I think I’m going to have to contact my husband’s affair partner

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So is this one of the threads Jeff was referring to that has been posted by the same woman in the last few days? Referenced in the post he just locked down about OP’s husband telling his AP that OP is revolting?

OP, if that is you, all I can say is there is no way out of this mess until you get tired enough of mistreatment and tired enough of feeling the way you feel now. Then and only then will you feel better. I really do wish you the best. It’s not fun being lost like this.

+1

I'd love for the OW to get hit by Karma, but in this case OP is trying to make herself feel better any way but the only way that would actually work: leaving her husband. Nothing else is going to scratch that itch, OP.

Bingo !!!!

Also Karma! But people don’t like to think about that. And plotting revenge never brings good karma.

I sometimes wonder ... so many folks suggest the that they expect the spouse's APs to get "hit with Karma" -- but have you considered that your spouse and their AP are YOUR Karma for something crappy you've done in the past?? Sometimes, most of the time, all of the time ... you aren't the innocent or pure one. Nobody is. "Karma" doesn't always work in the way you think it does.

Ouch!

Those who believe in Karma don't think this deeply about how it really works. Lol

Yeah. I've seen the betrayed spouse coming out the best in most of these situations. It's not a bad final outcome so I don't see it as karma working against him/her.

My neighbor has a wonderful new life partner and a second home, kids are all launched. She is having the time of her life. Spouse has newborn twins at age 51, OW 45...and they are miserable. He is cash-strapped now after the divorce settlement. The kids from his first marriage lost all respect for him and last I heard--strong rumors he's now cheating on the 2ndwife/OW.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So is this one of the threads Jeff was referring to that has been posted by the same woman in the last few days? Referenced in the post he just locked down about OP’s husband telling his AP that OP is revolting?

OP, if that is you, all I can say is there is no way out of this mess until you get tired enough of mistreatment and tired enough of feeling the way you feel now. Then and only then will you feel better. I really do wish you the best. It’s not fun being lost like this.

+1

I'd love for the OW to get hit by Karma, but in this case OP is trying to make herself feel better any way but the only way that would actually work: leaving her husband. Nothing else is going to scratch that itch, OP.

Bingo !!!!

Also Karma! But people don’t like to think about that. And plotting revenge never brings good karma.

I sometimes wonder ... so many folks suggest the that they expect the spouse's APs to get "hit with Karma" -- but have you considered that your spouse and their AP are YOUR Karma for something crappy you've done in the past?? Sometimes, most of the time, all of the time ... you aren't the innocent or pure one. Nobody is. "Karma" doesn't always work in the way you think it does.

Ouch!

Those who believe in Karma don't think this deeply about how it really works. Lol

Yeah. I've seen the betrayed spouse coming out the best in most of these situations. It's not a bad final outcome so I don't see it as karma working against him/her.

My neighbor has a wonderful new life partner and a second home, kids are all launched. She is having the time of her life. Spouse has newborn twins at age 51, OW 45...and they are miserable. He is cash-strapped now after the divorce settlement. The kids from his first marriage lost all respect for him and last I heard--strong rumors he's now cheating on the 2ndwife/OW.

Oh and we often joke about his 'karma'. When he has come over a few times for some kid-related things, he looks absolutely beat down and miserable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So is this one of the threads Jeff was referring to that has been posted by the same woman in the last few days? Referenced in the post he just locked down about OP’s husband telling his AP that OP is revolting?

OP, if that is you, all I can say is there is no way out of this mess until you get tired enough of mistreatment and tired enough of feeling the way you feel now. Then and only then will you feel better. I really do wish you the best. It’s not fun being lost like this.

+1

I'd love for the OW to get hit by Karma, but in this case OP is trying to make herself feel better any way but the only way that would actually work: leaving her husband. Nothing else is going to scratch that itch, OP.

Bingo !!!!

Also Karma! But people don’t like to think about that. And plotting revenge never brings good karma.

I sometimes wonder ... so many folks suggest the that they expect the spouse's APs to get "hit with Karma" -- but have you considered that your spouse and their AP are YOUR Karma for something crappy you've done in the past?? Sometimes, most of the time, all of the time ... you aren't the innocent or pure one. Nobody is. "Karma" doesn't always work in the way you think it does.

Ouch!

Those who believe in Karma don't think this deeply about how it really works. Lol

Yeah. I've seen the betrayed spouse coming out the best in most of these situations. It's not a bad final outcome so I don't see it as karma working against him/her.

My neighbor has a wonderful new life partner and a second home, kids are all launched. She is having the time of her life. Spouse has newborn twins at age 51, OW 45...and they are miserable. He is cash-strapped now after the divorce settlement. The kids from his first marriage lost all respect for him and last I heard--strong rumors he's now cheating on the 2ndwife/OW.

Meh. It's not a final outcome for your neighbor either. No one really knows how this life is going to end.

Alternatively, perhaps it was Karma and now that all her wrongdoings have been canceled out. Then she gets a new better fresh start.

[Anonymous]

^ people that lie, cheat and betray will usually have it catch up with them over time. I don't see that as karma (though many like to say it is). It's just a person lacking empathy and character whose life actions catch up with them. The charade is hard to keep up after awhile. Trump, Giuliani, are examples on the big stage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:^ people that lie, cheat and betray will usually have it catch up with them over time. I don't see that as karma (though many like to say it is). It's just a person lacking empathy and character whose life actions catch up with them. The charade is hard to keep up after awhile. Trump, Giuliani, are examples on the big stage.

Yes. This makes more sense than Karma.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So is this one of the threads Jeff was referring to that has been posted by the same woman in the last few days? Referenced in the post he just locked down about OP’s husband telling his AP that OP is revolting?

OP, if that is you, all I can say is there is no way out of this mess until you get tired enough of mistreatment and tired enough of feeling the way you feel now. Then and only then will you feel better. I really do wish you the best. It’s not fun being lost like this.

+1

I'd love for the OW to get hit by Karma, but in this case OP is trying to make herself feel better any way but the only way that would actually work: leaving her husband. Nothing else is going to scratch that itch, OP.

Bingo !!!!

Also Karma! But people don’t like to think about that. And plotting revenge never brings good karma.

I sometimes wonder ... so many folks suggest the that they expect the spouse's APs to get "hit with Karma" -- but have you considered that your spouse and their AP are YOUR Karma for something crappy you've done in the past?? Sometimes, most of the time, all of the time ... you aren't the innocent or pure one. Nobody is. "Karma" doesn't always work in the way you think it does.

Ouch!

Those who believe in Karma don't think this deeply about how it really works. Lol

Yeah. I've seen the betrayed spouse coming out the best in most of these situations. It's not a bad final outcome so I don't see it as karma working against him/her.

My neighbor has a wonderful new life partner and a second home, kids are all launched. She is having the time of her life. Spouse has newborn twins at age 51, OW 45...and they are miserable. He is cash-strapped now after the divorce settlement. The kids from his first marriage lost all respect for him and last I heard--strong rumors he's now cheating on the 2ndwife/OW.

Thank goodness these folks have you to keep tabs on and share all the "strong rumors" about them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So is this one of the threads Jeff was referring to that has been posted by the same woman in the last few days? Referenced in the post he just locked down about OP’s husband telling his AP that OP is revolting?

OP, if that is you, all I can say is there is no way out of this mess until you get tired enough of mistreatment and tired enough of feeling the way you feel now. Then and only then will you feel better. I really do wish you the best. It’s not fun being lost like this.

+1

I'd love for the OW to get hit by Karma, but in this case OP is trying to make herself feel better any way but the only way that would actually work: leaving her husband. Nothing else is going to scratch that itch, OP.

Bingo !!!!

Also Karma! But people don’t like to think about that. And plotting revenge never brings good karma.

I sometimes wonder ... so many folks suggest the that they expect the spouse's APs to get "hit with Karma" -- but have you considered that your spouse and their AP are YOUR Karma for something crappy you've done in the past?? Sometimes, most of the time, all of the time ... you aren't the innocent or pure one. Nobody is. "Karma" doesn't always work in the way you think it does.

Ouch!

Those who believe in Karma don't think this deeply about how it really works. Lol

Yeah. I've seen the betrayed spouse coming out the best in most of these situations. It's not a bad final outcome so I don't see it as karma working against him/her.

My neighbor has a wonderful new life partner and a second home, kids are all launched. She is having the time of her life. Spouse has newborn twins at age 51, OW 45...and they are miserable. He is cash-strapped now after the divorce settlement. The kids from his first marriage lost all respect for him and last I heard--strong rumors he's now cheating on the 2ndwife/OW.

Thank goodness these folks have you to keep tabs on and share all the "strong rumors" about them.

I wonder what the karma is for gossiping online about struggling people?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So is this one of the threads Jeff was referring to that has been posted by the same woman in the last few days? Referenced in the post he just locked down about OP’s husband telling his AP that OP is revolting?

OP, if that is you, all I can say is there is no way out of this mess until you get tired enough of mistreatment and tired enough of feeling the way you feel now. Then and only then will you feel better. I really do wish you the best. It’s not fun being lost like this.

+1

I'd love for the OW to get hit by Karma, but in this case OP is trying to make herself feel better any way but the only way that would actually work: leaving her husband. Nothing else is going to scratch that itch, OP.

Bingo !!!!

Also Karma! But people don’t like to think about that. And plotting revenge never brings good karma.

I sometimes wonder ... so many folks suggest the that they expect the spouse's APs to get "hit with Karma" -- but have you considered that your spouse and their AP are YOUR Karma for something crappy you've done in the past?? Sometimes, most of the time, all of the time ... you aren't the innocent or pure one. Nobody is. "Karma" doesn't always work in the way you think it does.

Ouch!

Those who believe in Karma don't think this deeply about how it really works. Lol

Yeah. I've seen the betrayed spouse coming out the best in most of these situations. It's not a bad final outcome so I don't see it as karma working against him/her.

My neighbor has a wonderful new life partner and a second home, kids are all launched. She is having the time of her life. Spouse has newborn twins at age 51, OW 45...and they are miserable. He is cash-strapped now after the divorce settlement. The kids from his first marriage lost all respect for him and last I heard--strong rumors he's now cheating on the 2ndwife/OW.

Thank goodness these folks have you to keep tabs on and share all the "strong rumors" about them.

I wonder what the karma is for gossiping online about struggling people?

Are your ears burning?

[Anonymous]

I don't know of any interpretation of karma -- Buddhist, Hindu, or otherwise -- that would blame the person harmed by an evil deed. It is very much about the person choosing to do good deeds or ill and what type of fruit it will bear in their own lives. Karma is not about victim-blaming, and it's certainly not about schadenfreude, but rather about encouraging people to live moral lives.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't know of any interpretation of karma -- Buddhist, Hindu, or otherwise -- that would blame the person harmed by an evil deed. It is very much about the person choosing to do good deeds or ill and what type of fruit it will bear in their own lives. Karma is not about victim-blaming, and it's certainly not about schadenfreude, but rather about encouraging people to live moral lives.

If you believe in Karma, a victim of one evil deed may be a perpetrator of a previous one. So the subsequent evil deed may just be karma for the first.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't know of any interpretation of karma -- Buddhist, Hindu, or otherwise -- that would blame the person harmed by an evil deed. It is very much about the person choosing to do good deeds or ill and what type of fruit it will bear in their own lives. Karma is not about victim-blaming, and it's certainly not about schadenfreude, but rather about encouraging people to live moral lives.

If you believe in Karma, a victim of one evil deed may be a perpetrator of a previous one. So the subsequent evil deed may just be karma for the first.

Nope. I refuse to believe somebody that is raped or abused or a victim of a violent robbery or murdered or a betrayed spouse is getting karma served. I do believe the person committing those moral bad deeds and/or crimes is a bad seed/liar/morally corrupt/lacks empathy, etc. And, I do think a person that acts with such blatant disregard for others and is okay with lying, deceiving and causing harm will have it catch up to them. It's a rotten core.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't know of any interpretation of karma -- Buddhist, Hindu, or otherwise -- that would blame the person harmed by an evil deed. It is very much about the person choosing to do good deeds or ill and what type of fruit it will bear in their own lives. Karma is not about victim-blaming, and it's certainly not about schadenfreude, but rather about encouraging people to live moral lives.

If you believe in Karma, a victim of one evil deed may be a perpetrator of a previous one. So the subsequent evil deed may just be karma for the first.

Nope. I refuse to believe somebody that is raped or abused or a victim of a violent robbery or murdered or a betrayed spouse is getting karma served. I do believe the person committing those moral bad deeds and/or crimes is a bad seed/liar/morally corrupt/lacks empathy, etc. And, I do think a person that acts with such blatant disregard for others and is okay with lying, deceiving and causing harm will have it catch up to them. It's a rotten core.

And I do think there is a lot of mental gymnastics by cheaters all the time---even in : oh the betrayed deserved it because of something in their past. Give me a break.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't know of any interpretation of karma -- Buddhist, Hindu, or otherwise -- that would blame the person harmed by an evil deed. It is very much about the person choosing to do good deeds or ill and what type of fruit it will bear in their own lives. Karma is not about victim-blaming, and it's certainly not about schadenfreude, but rather about encouraging people to live moral lives.

If you believe in Karma, a victim of one evil deed may be a perpetrator of a previous one. So the subsequent evil deed may just be karma for the first.

Nope. I refuse to believe somebody that is raped or abused or a victim of a violent robbery or murdered or a betrayed spouse is getting karma served. I do believe the person committing those moral bad deeds and/or crimes is a bad seed/liar/morally corrupt/lacks empathy, etc. And, I do think a person that acts with such blatant disregard for others and is okay with lying, deceiving and causing harm will have it catch up to them. It's a rotten core.

But if the cheating spouse gets cheated on in the next marriage, is that Karma. I know someone who cheated on his wife, left her and then got cheated on by his then AP/new wife who also left him. Is that Karma?

I think it's his behavior catching up with him because he failed to see that the kind of person who sleeps with a married man is the kind of person who does not take marriage vows seriously.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't know of any interpretation of karma -- Buddhist, Hindu, or otherwise -- that would blame the person harmed by an evil deed. It is very much about the person choosing to do good deeds or ill and what type of fruit it will bear in their own lives. Karma is not about victim-blaming, and it's certainly not about schadenfreude, but rather about encouraging people to live moral lives.

If you believe in Karma, a victim of one evil deed may be a perpetrator of a previous one. So the subsequent evil deed may just be karma for the first.

Nope. I refuse to believe somebody that is raped or abused or a victim of a violent robbery or murdered or a betrayed spouse is getting karma served. I do believe the person committing those moral bad deeds and/or crimes is a bad seed/liar/morally corrupt/lacks empathy, etc. And, I do think a person that acts with such blatant disregard for others and is okay with lying, deceiving and causing harm will have it catch up to them. It's a rotten core.

And I do think there is a lot of mental gymnastics by cheaters all the time---even in : oh the betrayed deserved it because of something in their past. Give me a break.

I am not sure how you can believe in karma and not believe that some of the bad things happening to them is karma. If not, then karma never happens or always happens right away so that everybody can see an immediate link to the act that called for it.

Short story: The whole idea of karma is similar to heaven and hell. You need to play dumb to believe in it.

[Anonymous]

I think some people really mean 'comeuppance' when they speak of karma in these situations. IDK.