DH - "You didn't even start dinner?"

[Anonymous]

So, it was my first day alone on maternity leave. Baby is two weeks old, nursing around the clock every 1-2 hours, my breasts are killing me, stitches are itchy and sore, and am totally sleep deprived because I've been doing pretty much all of the night wakings, while DH sleeps in the other room. DH went back to work today for the first time, and just came home with our two older kids. His first reaction "what, you didn't get dinner started?" I just stared at him and walked away. But I want to scratch his eyeballs out.

Am I overreacting here? I did several loads of laundry, washed all the dishes leftover from yesterday's dinner and breakfast (which DH said he would do, but didn't). And basically walked around nursing a fussing newborn in the ergo carrier. I haven't showered and haven't taken care of my own personal hygiene. And he is making underhanded comments about dinner? I dread the next couple of months when the comments like "what did you do all day?" and "you're on an extended vacation." Will start. Any advice on how to stop this immediately. FWIW, I usually work fulltime.

TIA.

[Anonymous]

You should've called him and told him to pick something up or gone out to get dinner yourself. Are the two older kids usually starving when you get home? This is the third time you've done this so get it together.

[Anonymous]

Go back to work. You are married to a jerk.

Insist that he gets a vasectomy or withhold sex.

[Anonymous]

Umm, how about "honey I left the divorce papers on the dining room table". Your husband sounds like a complete and total douche. Behavior like this doesn't just come out of nowhere, I assume this is his usual MO? In which case having a third DC probably wasn't the best idea. I'm sorry I know that wasn't helpful but it sounds like he is just a self centered jerk and after 3 kids that isn't about to change.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I just stared at him and walked away.

Seems appropriate.

[Anonymous]

No, but I'm going to start divorce proceedings if you ever say anything like that to me again.

Then let him know what you DID accomplish today. Then say "this is from some stranger on the internet" before kicking him in the balls.

[Anonymous]

OP, this is our situation exactly. Our third is due any day now , and I already know I will hear stuff like this when I am
on my maternity leave "vacation."
I have no advice, just commiseration. I wish I knew who you were so we could vent to each other.

[Anonymous]

I would have said to him, knowing you were in pain with a 2 week old, why on earth did he not call and offer to bring carry out for you and get something for himself and the two kids.

[Anonymous]

I think that you should have called/texted him and asked him to pick something up on his way home (or ordered a pizza/some sort of delivery).

[Anonymous]

Ask him what the five fingers said to the face.

[Anonymous]

Oh goodness, how can he be so clueless after 3 kids?

DH knows he can't say this. If he does, he knows I will just STEAMROLL him.

OP, please show your inconsiderate husband this very thread.

[Anonymous]

As a working mom of three with a stay at home dad, I sympathize with dh. What were your two other children going to eat for dinner? And you? You really did't think about this? Just pop a frozen lasagna in the oven and stop complaining. You had a baby not chemotherapy.

[Anonymous]

I would've kicked him square in the ball sack. Do not make dinner for him the entire time you are home. What an ass!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, this is our situation exactly. Our third is due any day now , and I already know I will hear stuff like this when I am
on my maternity leave "vacation."
I have no advice, just commiseration. I wish I knew who you were so we could vent to each other.

Why would you have 3 children with someone like this?

[Anonymous]

Please post your address so we can come over and kick him in the balls