Marriage is a horrible deal for women

[Anonymous]

Give me a providing spouse, and I will raise the littles. No $2000/month daycare needed. I will clean, cook, grocery shop, bathe the children and tend to them. This is how I was raised, and it works beautifully.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Give me a providing spouse, and I will raise the littles. No $2000/month daycare needed. I will clean, cook, grocery shop, bathe the children and tend to them. This is how I was raised, and it works beautifully.

Are men beating down your door for this offer?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s tragic that nobody values traditional family life anywhere. The poorest people seem to value it the most.

Traditional family life is a way to make women do free labor, and keep men dominant in society.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s tragic that nobody values traditional family life anywhere. The poorest people seem to value it the most.

Traditional family life is a way to make women do free labor, and keep men dominant in society.

I very much enjoyed growing up in a large family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Give me a providing spouse, and I will raise the littles. No $2000/month daycare needed. I will clean, cook, grocery shop, bathe the children and tend to them. This is how I was raised, and it works beautifully.

And this is why we are in the position we are. Women like this who perpetuate this standard.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s tragic that nobody values traditional family life anywhere. The poorest people seem to value it the most.

Traditional family life is a way to make women do free labor, and keep men dominant in society.

I very much enjoyed growing up in a large family.

My DH did too and I’m the tiniest bit jealous.

My MIL never worked a job after kids in a large traditional family and in no way was she not “dominant in society”. She merely had(has) influence in different areas than FIL.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s tragic that nobody values traditional family life anywhere. The poorest people seem to value it the most.

you must be a man.
Sorry to say the tide of change won’t stop.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Give me a providing spouse, and I will raise the littles. No $2000/month daycare needed. I will clean, cook, grocery shop, bathe the children and tend to them. This is how I was raised, and it works beautifully.

And this is why we are in the position we are. Women like this who perpetuate this standard.

“This standard” works.

[Anonymous]

I’m a structural functionalist.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s tragic that nobody values traditional family life anywhere. The poorest people seem to value it the most.

Have you been around actual poor people? The poor have the highest rates of out of wedlock births and divorces.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s tragic that nobody values traditional family life anywhere. The poorest people seem to value it the most.

Have you been around actual poor people? The poor have the highest rates of out of wedlock births and divorces.

And they are happier. They provide childcare for one another, too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I grew up in an UMC area and most women with kids, especially young ones, stay home. My college friends “married well” and seem pretty happy. At least as happy as the women working two shifts. They are married to men who make more money than they could in the workforce. The husbands wanted kids and are content with family life. The women enjoy doing all of the planning, driving kids around etc. Seems like a good deal for both parties.

I’m convinced most people in this area are so stressed, unhappy and don’t have any fun because of more families being dual income. It’s all work and no fun.

Agree with everyone that it’s terrible for women if you’re working AND doing everything at home.

I can assure you… your umc friends are eating poop in their marriage.

We all have to eat poop somewhere.

As a PP mentioned if it’s not in the marriage then it’s in the job. And there are social and financial implications for either choice that place additional stress and anxiety that manifests in different ways. I think it offers an opportunity, though, for women to self-actualise. At least it has for me.

If it’s at your job at least you don’t have to go to bed with them.

Sure, but you can get laid off. Is a 52 year old woman really having that great of sex with men she meets? Probably not.

A 52 year old single woman might not have as great of a future as she thinks. There’s ageism in the workplace and facing health problems alone. I can’t imagine being 50 and dating.

I’m going to face ageism in the workplace but I have a husband to rely on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I grew up in an UMC area and most women with kids, especially young ones, stay home. My college friends “married well” and seem pretty happy. At least as happy as the women working two shifts. They are married to men who make more money than they could in the workforce. The husbands wanted kids and are content with family life. The women enjoy doing all of the planning, driving kids around etc. Seems like a good deal for both parties.

I’m convinced most people in this area are so stressed, unhappy and don’t have any fun because of more families being dual income. It’s all work and no fun.

Agree with everyone that it’s terrible for women if you’re working AND doing everything at home.

I can assure you… your umc friends are eating poop in their marriage.

We all have to eat poop somewhere.

As a PP mentioned if it’s not in the marriage then it’s in the job. And there are social and financial implications for either choice that place additional stress and anxiety that manifests in different ways. I think it offers an opportunity, though, for women to self-actualise. At least it has for me.

If it’s at your job at least you don’t have to go to bed with them.

Sure, but you can get laid off. Is a 52 year old woman really having that great of sex with men she meets? Probably not.

A 52 year old single woman might not have as great of a future as she thinks. There’s ageism in the workplace and facing health problems alone. I can’t imagine being 50 and dating.

I’m going to face ageism in the workplace but I have a husband to rely on.

And he won't also have these problems?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I grew up in an UMC area and most women with kids, especially young ones, stay home. My college friends “married well” and seem pretty happy. At least as happy as the women working two shifts. They are married to men who make more money than they could in the workforce. The husbands wanted kids and are content with family life. The women enjoy doing all of the planning, driving kids around etc. Seems like a good deal for both parties.

I’m convinced most people in this area are so stressed, unhappy and don’t have any fun because of more families being dual income. It’s all work and no fun.

Agree with everyone that it’s terrible for women if you’re working AND doing everything at home.

I can assure you… your umc friends are eating poop in their marriage.

We all have to eat poop somewhere.

As a PP mentioned if it’s not in the marriage then it’s in the job. And there are social and financial implications for either choice that place additional stress and anxiety that manifests in different ways. I think it offers an opportunity, though, for women to self-actualise. At least it has for me.

If it’s at your job at least you don’t have to go to bed with them.

Sure, but you can get laid off. Is a 52 year old woman really having that great of sex with men she meets? Probably not.

A 52 year old single woman might not have as great of a future as she thinks. There’s ageism in the workplace and facing health problems alone. I can’t imagine being 50 and dating.

I’m going to face ageism in the workplace but I have a husband to rely on.

What makes you think there isn’t ageism in marriages? A 52 yo woman can get “laid off” from her marriage too.

And yea btw a 52 yo woman can have great sex. Many aren’t even menopausal yet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I grew up in an UMC area and most women with kids, especially young ones, stay home. My college friends “married well” and seem pretty happy. At least as happy as the women working two shifts. They are married to men who make more money than they could in the workforce. The husbands wanted kids and are content with family life. The women enjoy doing all of the planning, driving kids around etc. Seems like a good deal for both parties.

I’m convinced most people in this area are so stressed, unhappy and don’t have any fun because of more families being dual income. It’s all work and no fun.

Agree with everyone that it’s terrible for women if you’re working AND doing everything at home.

I can assure you… your umc friends are eating poop in their marriage.

We all have to eat poop somewhere.

As a PP mentioned if it’s not in the marriage then it’s in the job. And there are social and financial implications for either choice that place additional stress and anxiety that manifests in different ways. I think it offers an opportunity, though, for women to self-actualise. At least it has for me.

If it’s at your job at least you don’t have to go to bed with them.

Sure, but you can get laid off. Is a 52 year old woman really having that great of sex with men she meets? Probably not.

A 52 year old single woman might not have as great of a future as she thinks. There’s ageism in the workplace and facing health problems alone. I can’t imagine being 50 and dating.

I’m going to face ageism in the workplace but I have a husband to rely on.

What makes you think there isn’t ageism in marriages? A 52 yo woman can get “laid off” from her marriage too.

And yea btw a 52 yo woman can have great sex. Many aren’t even menopausal yet.

Of course. The point is I wouldn’t count on the sex and career to continue being the same.

I can see how being 40 and single would be great. Still climbing career wise and plenty of men to sleep with. But 50s and older? No thanks. The security and companionship from a semi-decent marriage is way better than being a single 55 year old woman.