Johnny Depp trial in Fairfax County

[Anonymous]

Despite how Amber Heard doesn’t come off as particularly likeabke in court, I actually believe her claims that Depp was abusive.

The comments on this thread go against the vast majority of DCUM opinions. In almost every addict, alcoholic, substance abuse, multiple marriages post on DCUM where there is a spouse in this position the responses say something along the lines of “addicts are abusive. Run for your life now.”

Why now is DCUM going against its logic and lived experience to say Johnny Depp is any different? I’m sure Amber Heard is a basket case too. After all, they chose each other and married each other.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I've listened to most of the trial and I support AH. Seems clear he did a lot of bad stuff he doesn't remember.

I don't understand the self-confidence of someone who spent years abusing drugs and alcohol and yet seems to claim with absolute certainty that he would never do _____ [hit a woman/damage property/harm someone/etc.]. There is plenty of evidence that he did this terrible stuff -- punched out walls, completely destroyed property, scared people (especially women) he was being destructive around that he might hurt them, behave in a generally out of control way, even hit people or things accidentally - on top of testimony about more personal and damaging hitting/violence behind closed doors. He just doesn't want to believe he did this stuff, despite evidence to the contrary, because he doesn't want to be that guy. Isn't it pretty to think so? He needs help and some truth tellers around him who aren't on his payroll.

I agree with all of this, but think it's very telling that he's never taken responsibility for *any* of his behavior including his embarrassing unprofessionalism. He denies he has a substance abuse problem ffs even with photographic evidence! Who could possibly believe a single thing he claims to be true?

The same exact thing can be said about her

Except no evidence she is an addict or has ever been unprofessional on set.

She actually admitted taking drugs a couple of times during the trial. She probably stopped by now and thus - weight gain.

Recreational drug use is a far cry from serious bottom-dwelling addiction a la Depp. Any photos of her passed out, having sh*t herself? Anyone who's lived with an addict knows it is TORTURE.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She did a lot of recording. Why is there none of him being abusive to her?

I'm not a lawyer and won't guess at the outcome. However, I hope people in general realize that men can be victims of DV.

How did the lovely Ms Heard put it? Something about "Go ahead - tell people that Johnny Depp is abused. Who is going to believe you? You're such a baby. I didn't punch you, I hit you."

If he was apparently violent while drunk, why did she pour him a drink when he got home? That makes no sense to me.

Sincere question that I'm hoping someone with DV or IPV training can answer. Why would AH buy JD an engraved knife as a gift after he had abused her?

That's something else that doesn't make sense to me. She seems to have done things that would put her at risk.Why??

Victims are imperfect

Same could be said for him then, since there is a recording of her admitting to hitting him and then calling him names and mocking him.

Are only female victims imperfect ?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I've listened to most of the trial and I support AH. Seems clear he did a lot of bad stuff he doesn't remember.

I don't understand the self-confidence of someone who spent years abusing drugs and alcohol and yet seems to claim with absolute certainty that he would never do _____ [hit a woman/damage property/harm someone/etc.]. There is plenty of evidence that he did this terrible stuff -- punched out walls, completely destroyed property, scared people (especially women) he was being destructive around that he might hurt them, behave in a generally out of control way, even hit people or things accidentally - on top of testimony about more personal and damaging hitting/violence behind closed doors. He just doesn't want to believe he did this stuff, despite evidence to the contrary, because he doesn't want to be that guy. Isn't it pretty to think so? He needs help and some truth tellers around him who aren't on his payroll.

I agree with all of this, but think it's very telling that he's never taken responsibility for *any* of his behavior including his embarrassing unprofessionalism. He denies he has a substance abuse problem ffs even with photographic evidence! Who could possibly believe a single thing he claims to be true?

The same exact thing can be said about her

Except no evidence she is an addict or has ever been unprofessional on set.

She actually admitted taking drugs a couple of times during the trial. She probably stopped by now and thus - weight gain.

Recreational drug use is a far cry from serious bottom-dwelling addiction a la Depp. Any photos of her passed out, having sh*t herself? Anyone who's lived with an addict knows it is TORTURE.

Agree! And anyone who has lived with or been an addict knows it is nearly impossible to keep one’s cool and not end up at some point in a verbal or physical altercation with an addict. I am NOT condoning attacking an addict at all. Far from it. But that is why family systems therapy, Al-anon, and distancing from an addict are such necessary principles for people who are intertwined with addicts.

Being married to or having a family member who is an addict is insanely complicated and I think that the media and Publics response to this trial is a reflection of how completely naive most people are to the complexities of addiction.

It is also kind of misogynistic that the public is fawning over Depp’s lawyer patting his hand, opening his pencil case, fetching him water etc… like ok, all good to be kind and polite, but this doesn’t make either of them some noble creature. She is not his mom and he is not a baby and can we just stop fawning over men being treated like a baby as if that is somehow admirable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She did a lot of recording. Why is there none of him being abusive to her?

I'm not a lawyer and won't guess at the outcome. However, I hope people in general realize that men can be victims of DV.

How did the lovely Ms Heard put it? Something about "Go ahead - tell people that Johnny Depp is abused. Who is going to believe you? You're such a baby. I didn't punch you, I hit you."

If he was apparently violent while drunk, why did she pour him a drink when he got home? That makes no sense to me.

Sincere question that I'm hoping someone with DV or IPV training can answer. Why would AH buy JD an engraved knife as a gift after he had abused her?

That's something else that doesn't make sense to me. She seems to have done things that would put her at risk.Why??

Victims are imperfect

Same could be said for him then, since there is a recording of her admitting to hitting him and then calling him names and mocking him.

Are only female victims imperfect ?

No? Victims in general are imperfect. Both of these people are clearly highly imperfect. But what is notable is that Depp does not take one iota of responsibility in the mess of their marriage.

It seems to me like they are BOTH physically, verbally and emotionally abusive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She did a lot of recording. Why is there none of him being abusive to her?

I'm not a lawyer and won't guess at the outcome. However, I hope people in general realize that men can be victims of DV.

How did the lovely Ms Heard put it? Something about "Go ahead - tell people that Johnny Depp is abused. Who is going to believe you? You're such a baby. I didn't punch you, I hit you."

If he was apparently violent while drunk, why did she pour him a drink when he got home? That makes no sense to me.

Sincere question that I'm hoping someone with DV or IPV training can answer. Why would AH buy JD an engraved knife as a gift after he had abused her?

That's something else that doesn't make sense to me. She seems to have done things that would put her at risk.Why??

Victims are imperfect

Same could be said for him then, since there is a recording of her admitting to hitting him and then calling him names and mocking him.

Are only female victims imperfect ?

According to this thread, yes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Despite how Amber Heard doesn’t come off as particularly likeabke in court, I actually believe her claims that Depp was abusive.

The comments on this thread go against the vast majority of DCUM opinions. In almost every addict, alcoholic, substance abuse, multiple marriages post on DCUM where there is a spouse in this position the responses say something along the lines of “addicts are abusive. Run for your life now.”

Why now is DCUM going against its logic and lived experience to say Johnny Depp is any different? I’m sure Amber Heard is a basket case too. After all, they chose each other and married each other.

Easy answer: because I just assume that the regular DCUM wife is normal and whatever she tells us in her post is true. In AH-JD case, I previously believed her (just like I believed those DCUM wives) but the trial exposed many lies and inconsistencies in AH's story so it's hard to see her as a one-way victim now. I believe that both were equally responsible for their toxic relationship but I don't believe her narrative of her as a helpless victim and him as the perpetrator of that abuse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Despite how Amber Heard doesn’t come off as particularly likeabke in court, I actually believe her claims that Depp was abusive.

The comments on this thread go against the vast majority of DCUM opinions. In almost every addict, alcoholic, substance abuse, multiple marriages post on DCUM where there is a spouse in this position the responses say something along the lines of “addicts are abusive. Run for your life now.”

Why now is DCUM going against its logic and lived experience to say Johnny Depp is any different? I’m sure Amber Heard is a basket case too. After all, they chose each other and married each other.

Easy answer: because I just assume that the regular DCUM wife is normal and whatever she tells us in her post is true. In AH-JD case, I previously believed her (just like I believed those DCUM wives) but the trial exposed many lies and inconsistencies in AH's story so it's hard to see her as a one-way victim now. I believe that both were equally responsible for their toxic relationship but I don't believe her narrative of her as a helpless victim and him as the perpetrator of that abuse.

This.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She did a lot of recording. Why is there none of him being abusive to her?

I'm not a lawyer and won't guess at the outcome. However, I hope people in general realize that men can be victims of DV.

How did the lovely Ms Heard put it? Something about "Go ahead - tell people that Johnny Depp is abused. Who is going to believe you? You're such a baby. I didn't punch you, I hit you."

If he was apparently violent while drunk, why did she pour him a drink when he got home? That makes no sense to me.

Sincere question that I'm hoping someone with DV or IPV training can answer. Why would AH buy JD an engraved knife as a gift after he had abused her?

That's something else that doesn't make sense to me. She seems to have done things that would put her at risk.Why??

Victims are imperfect

Same could be said for him then, since there is a recording of her admitting to hitting him and then calling him names and mocking him.

Are only female victims imperfect ?

No? Victims in general are imperfect. Both of these people are clearly highly imperfect. But what is notable is that Depp does not take one iota of responsibility in the mess of their marriage.

It seems to me like they are BOTH physically, verbally and emotionally abusive.

It's AH who has not accepted any responsibility. JD owned up to his alcohol and drug use. AH is still portraying herself as the sole victim and everybody is out to get her and lie for JD to curry favors from him.

[Anonymous]

It is amazing how many days people can go around and around making exactly the same arguments, utterly convinced that this time when they post it, everyone will see it their way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It is amazing how many days people can go around and around making exactly the same arguments, utterly convinced that this time when they post it, everyone will see it their way.

So true! I guess we're stuck in our own head and no amount of arguing will make others jump ship into our camp

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:she's not especially likeable. but they had a relatively short-lived and obviously unhealthy/abusive relationship that was now already some years ago. he has filed this legal charade where he gets to (legally) torture her somewhat and waste 6 weeks of her life. it's amazing how many people want to immediately write her off as clearly also crazy and the issue as clearly being both of them. abusive narcissists can turn one's life upside down and be very vindictive (refusing to let the former partner truly emotionally and mentally move on) years after separation.

She could have left well enough alone and do without her Op ed? That would probably have prevented her from the torture and wasting 6 weeks of her life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:she's not especially likeable. but they had a relatively short-lived and obviously unhealthy/abusive relationship that was now already some years ago. he has filed this legal charade where he gets to (legally) torture her somewhat and waste 6 weeks of her life. it's amazing how many people want to immediately write her off as clearly also crazy and the issue as clearly being both of them. abusive narcissists can turn one's life upside down and be very vindictive (refusing to let the former partner truly emotionally and mentally move on) years after separation.

She could have left well enough alone and do without her Op ed? That would probably have prevented her from the torture and wasting 6 weeks of her life.

I know, right? Why won’t abuse victims just shut up and stop making other people, like, think about it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It is amazing how many days people can go around and around making exactly the same arguments, utterly convinced that this time when they post it, everyone will see it their way.

That’s what the jurors are thinking as they go into day 3 of deliberations.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:she's not especially likeable. but they had a relatively short-lived and obviously unhealthy/abusive relationship that was now already some years ago. he has filed this legal charade where he gets to (legally) torture her somewhat and waste 6 weeks of her life. it's amazing how many people want to immediately write her off as clearly also crazy and the issue as clearly being both of them. abusive narcissists can turn one's life upside down and be very vindictive (refusing to let the former partner truly emotionally and mentally move on) years after separation.

She could have left well enough alone and do without her Op ed? That would probably have prevented her from the torture and wasting 6 weeks of her life.

I know, right? Why won’t abuse victims just shut up and stop making other people, like, think about it?

Newspapers need to stop publishing drivel like this.