Help - gay brother

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just don't get why gays think people need to accept gays in their private lives.

OP isn't refusing to hire gays, harassing them at work, looking to deny them civil rights, campaigning to overturn gay marriage, rounding up neighbors to chase out the gays who bought next door, or doing anything to affect actual RIGHTS that gays have.

She just doesn't want gays in her personal, most intimate life.

Why do gays get to dictate who people can have in their lives?

You're gay. Fine. You should have all the same rights as everyone else. But this whole idea that people have to welcome you and your lover into their lives and celebrate you is so childish.

Some people are not going to like or befriend you because your homosexuality makes them uncomfortable. As a racial minority, I've had whites (including gay whites!) not welcome me into their social circles.

There is no right or entitlement to others' love.

Deal with it.

Were those unwelcoming whites your family members?

Based on your post, I suspect the gay white people who shunned you did it for reasons completely unrelated to your skin color.

As far as the gay whites shunning me goes, I couldn't care less. But when you pull your head out of your ass one day, you'll figure out that a lot of gay whites are racists and ignorant towards minorities of all types. The only issue they are conveniently liberal on is sexuality.

I never denied that gay people can be racist.

Just like, as you've proven, racial minorities can be homophobic.

Being a minority in one sense obviously doesn't make you a good person, nor accepting of other minorities.

Np. Do people even know what homophobic means anymore? Homophobic does not mean a person annoyed you or their stance differs from yours and you happen to be discussing gays. Goodness. People like you are going to make the word lose all meaning and effect.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just don't get why gays think people need to accept gays in their private lives.

OP isn't refusing to hire gays, harassing them at work, looking to deny them civil rights, campaigning to overturn gay marriage, rounding up neighbors to chase out the gays who bought next door, or doing anything to affect actual RIGHTS that gays have.

She just doesn't want gays in her personal, most intimate life.

Why do gays get to dictate who people can have in their lives?

You're gay. Fine. You should have all the same rights as everyone else. But this whole idea that people have to welcome you and your lover into their lives and celebrate you is so childish.

Some people are not going to like or befriend you because your homosexuality makes them uncomfortable. As a racial minority, I've had whites (including gay whites!) not welcome me into their social circles.

There is no right or entitlement to others' love.

Deal with it.

Were those unwelcoming whites your family members?

Based on your post, I suspect the gay white people who shunned you did it for reasons completely unrelated to your skin color.

As far as the gay whites shunning me goes, I couldn't care less. But when you pull your head out of your ass one day, you'll figure out that a lot of gay whites are racists and ignorant towards minorities of all types. The only issue they are conveniently liberal on is sexuality.

I never denied that gay people can be racist.

Just like, as you've proven, racial minorities can be homophobic.

Being a minority in one sense obviously doesn't make you a good person, nor accepting of other minorities.

Np. Do people even know what homophobic means anymore? Homophobic does not mean a person annoyed you or their stance differs from yours and you happen to be discussing gays. Goodness. People like you are going to make the word lose all meaning and effect.

Referring to gay people as "the gays" when using it as "the gays want acceptance! The Gays think they're entitled! I don't know why the gays have to be so annoying!" IS homophobia. It sounds like you don't know what it means.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just don't get why gays think people need to accept gays in their private lives.

OP isn't refusing to hire gays, harassing them at work, looking to deny them civil rights, campaigning to overturn gay marriage, rounding up neighbors to chase out the gays who bought next door, or doing anything to affect actual RIGHTS that gays have.

She just doesn't want gays in her personal, most intimate life.

Why do gays get to dictate who people can have in their lives?

You're gay. Fine. You should have all the same rights as everyone else. But this whole idea that people have to welcome you and your lover into their lives and celebrate you is so childish.

Some people are not going to like or befriend you because your homosexuality makes them uncomfortable. As a racial minority, I've had whites (including gay whites!) not welcome me into their social circles.

There is no right or entitlement to others' love.

Deal with it.

Were those unwelcoming whites your family members?

Based on your post, I suspect the gay white people who shunned you did it for reasons completely unrelated to your skin color.

As far as the gay whites shunning me goes, I couldn't care less. But when you pull your head out of your ass one day, you'll figure out that a lot of gay whites are racists and ignorant towards minorities of all types. The only issue they are conveniently liberal on is sexuality.

I never denied that gay people can be racist.

Just like, as you've proven, racial minorities can be homophobic.

Being a minority in one sense obviously doesn't make you a good person, nor accepting of other minorities.

Np. Do people even know what homophobic means anymore? Homophobic does not mean a person annoyed you or their stance differs from yours and you happen to be discussing gays. Goodness. People like you are going to make the word lose all meaning and effect.

Actually, if you generalize LGBT people as one group and have an issue supporting them, yeah you're homophobic. Hope that helps.

[Anonymous]

No, "gay people" are not trying to dictate who is in your life, but choosing people to be in your life based on sexual orientation, skin color, religion, or even political party affiliation is superficial. I personally want to raise my children in a diverse, accepting, and understanding environment and include friends and family who are gay, bi, trans, fat, thin, old, young, black, white, brown, pink, blonde, brunette, blue-eyed, green-eyed, tall, short, Jewish, Mormon, Muslim, Christian, Republican, Democrat, Green-party, Libertarian party. People have more to offer us because of their diversity of opinions and experiences and not just because they are yes men. Yes, I will invite you to my dinner party just because you are a Trump or Jill Stein supporter -- I don't get to meet many!

I'm a bi, Hispanic Republican Baptist married to a straight white Jewish democrat and our kids are happy and love our informative, lively, fascinaging dinner conversations! They are being raised to be future leaders of our country and our world. Most of our freinds are in interfaith, interrace, and inter-political marriages and they are the best marriages I've known!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I just don't get why gays think people need to accept gays in their private lives.

OP isn't refusing to hire gays, harassing them at work, looking to deny them civil rights, campaigning to overturn gay marriage, rounding up neighbors to chase out the gays who bought next door, or doing anything to affect actual RIGHTS that gays have.

She just doesn't want gays in her personal, most intimate life.

Why do gays get to dictate who people can have in their lives?

You're gay. Fine. You should have all the same rights as everyone else. But this whole idea that people have to welcome you and your lover into their lives and celebrate you is so childish.

Some people are not going to like or befriend you because your homosexuality makes them uncomfortable. As a racial minority, I've had whites (including gay whites!) not welcome me into their social circles.

There is no right or entitlement to others' love.

Deal with it.

The OP's post isn't about welcoming LGBT people into her social circle. It isn't about not befriending a new neighbor or co-worker who happens to be gay. It is about her relationship with her brother. She disapproves of her brother's SO because the SO is the "wrong" sex. It is comparable to a family member who disapproves of your SO because s/he is a member of a different race, culture, ethnicity, religion, etc. In this case, her disapproval is so strong that she is only willing to have a relationship with her brother if he pretends the SO doesn't exist. No one expects OP to become best friends with her brother's SO. But she is expected to give her brother and his SO the basic respect of acknowledging/accepting their relationship.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just don't get why gays think people need to accept gays in their private lives.

OP isn't refusing to hire gays, harassing them at work, looking to deny them civil rights, campaigning to overturn gay marriage, rounding up neighbors to chase out the gays who bought next door, or doing anything to affect actual RIGHTS that gays have.

She just doesn't want gays in her personal, most intimate life.

Why do gays get to dictate who people can have in their lives?

You're gay. Fine. You should have all the same rights as everyone else. But this whole idea that people have to welcome you and your lover into their lives and celebrate you is so childish.

Some people are not going to like or befriend you because your homosexuality makes them uncomfortable. As a racial minority, I've had whites (including gay whites!) not welcome me into their social circles.

There is no right or entitlement to others' love.

Deal with it.

The OP's post isn't about welcoming LGBT people into her social circle. It isn't about not befriending a new neighbor or co-worker who happens to be gay. It is about her relationship with her brother. She disapproves of her brother's SO because the SO is the "wrong" sex. It is comparable to a family member who disapproves of your SO because s/he is a member of a different race, culture, ethnicity, religion, etc. In this case, her disapproval is so strong that she is only willing to have a relationship with her brother if he pretends the SO doesn't exist. No one expects OP to become best friends with her brother's SO. But she is expected to give her brother and his SO the basic respect of acknowledging/accepting their relationship.

MIL/FIL won't talk to me because I'm voting for Trump. I am fine with them voting for Clinton. I live in DC so my vote won't matter but they refuse to have anyone in their home who casts a vote for Trump. I didn't volunteer who I was voting for but they knew I am a registered Republican and harassed me until I told them. I think it's interesting that liberals who preach acceptance can be so unaccepting and my DC Republican friends are more open to other opinions without getting angry or judgmental.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just don't get why gays think people need to accept gays in their private lives.

OP isn't refusing to hire gays, harassing them at work, looking to deny them civil rights, campaigning to overturn gay marriage, rounding up neighbors to chase out the gays who bought next door, or doing anything to affect actual RIGHTS that gays have.

She just doesn't want gays in her personal, most intimate life.

Why do gays get to dictate who people can have in their lives?

You're gay. Fine. You should have all the same rights as everyone else. But this whole idea that people have to welcome you and your lover into their lives and celebrate you is so childish.

Some people are not going to like or befriend you because your homosexuality makes them uncomfortable. As a racial minority, I've had whites (including gay whites!) not welcome me into their social circles.

There is no right or entitlement to others' love.

Deal with it.

The OP's post isn't about welcoming LGBT people into her social circle. It isn't about not befriending a new neighbor or co-worker who happens to be gay. It is about her relationship with her brother. She disapproves of her brother's SO because the SO is the "wrong" sex. It is comparable to a family member who disapproves of your SO because s/he is a member of a different race, culture, ethnicity, religion, etc. In this case, her disapproval is so strong that she is only willing to have a relationship with her brother if he pretends the SO doesn't exist. No one expects OP to become best friends with her brother's SO. But she is expected to give her brother and his SO the basic respect of acknowledging/accepting their relationship.

MIL/FIL won't talk to me because I'm voting for Trump. I am fine with them voting for Clinton. I live in DC so my vote won't matter but they refuse to have anyone in their home who casts a vote for Trump. I didn't volunteer who I was voting for but they knew I am a registered Republican and harassed me until I told them. I think it's interesting that liberals who preach acceptance can be so unaccepting and my DC Republican friends are more open to other opinions without getting angry or judgmental.

Yep -- the only hate I see in this thread is from supposedly tolerant people directing their venom toward the OP. I have a gay relative. I don't hate her. But I disagree with some of the choices she's made. She doesn't have to agree with the choices I've made. We still talk. We still love each other. I'm not afraid of having a different opinion than most people. If that makes you want to call me names, so be it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just don't get why gays think people need to accept gays in their private lives.

OP isn't refusing to hire gays, harassing them at work, looking to deny them civil rights, campaigning to overturn gay marriage, rounding up neighbors to chase out the gays who bought next door, or doing anything to affect actual RIGHTS that gays have.

She just doesn't want gays in her personal, most intimate life.

Why do gays get to dictate who people can have in their lives?

You're gay. Fine. You should have all the same rights as everyone else. But this whole idea that people have to welcome you and your lover into their lives and celebrate you is so childish.

Some people are not going to like or befriend you because your homosexuality makes them uncomfortable. As a racial minority, I've had whites (including gay whites!) not welcome me into their social circles.

There is no right or entitlement to others' love.

Deal with it.

The OP's post isn't about welcoming LGBT people into her social circle. It isn't about not befriending a new neighbor or co-worker who happens to be gay. It is about her relationship with her brother. She disapproves of her brother's SO because the SO is the "wrong" sex. It is comparable to a family member who disapproves of your SO because s/he is a member of a different race, culture, ethnicity, religion, etc. In this case, her disapproval is so strong that she is only willing to have a relationship with her brother if he pretends the SO doesn't exist. No one expects OP to become best friends with her brother's SO. But she is expected to give her brother and his SO the basic respect of acknowledging/accepting their relationship.

MIL/FIL won't talk to me because I'm voting for Trump. I am fine with them voting for Clinton. I live in DC so my vote won't matter but they refuse to have anyone in their home who casts a vote for Trump. I didn't volunteer who I was voting for but they knew I am a registered Republican and harassed me until I told them. I think it's interesting that liberals who preach acceptance can be so unaccepting and my DC Republican friends are more open to other opinions without getting angry or judgmental.

Trump is not like any other candidate. It is not the same as accepting someone voting for Bush or something. But regardless, since you attempted to change the topic and slam liberals at once, you can choose who to vote for but not your sexuality. Being a trump supporter isn't at the core of your existence. I hope.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just don't get why gays think people need to accept gays in their private lives.

OP isn't refusing to hire gays, harassing them at work, looking to deny them civil rights, campaigning to overturn gay marriage, rounding up neighbors to chase out the gays who bought next door, or doing anything to affect actual RIGHTS that gays have.

She just doesn't want gays in her personal, most intimate life.

Why do gays get to dictate who people can have in their lives?

You're gay. Fine. You should have all the same rights as everyone else. But this whole idea that people have to welcome you and your lover into their lives and celebrate you is so childish.

Some people are not going to like or befriend you because your homosexuality makes them uncomfortable. As a racial minority, I've had whites (including gay whites!) not welcome me into their social circles.

There is no right or entitlement to others' love.

Deal with it.

The OP's post isn't about welcoming LGBT people into her social circle. It isn't about not befriending a new neighbor or co-worker who happens to be gay. It is about her relationship with her brother. She disapproves of her brother's SO because the SO is the "wrong" sex. It is comparable to a family member who disapproves of your SO because s/he is a member of a different race, culture, ethnicity, religion, etc. In this case, her disapproval is so strong that she is only willing to have a relationship with her brother if he pretends the SO doesn't exist. No one expects OP to become best friends with her brother's SO. But she is expected to give her brother and his SO the basic respect of acknowledging/accepting their relationship.

MIL/FIL won't talk to me because I'm voting for Trump. I am fine with them voting for Clinton. I live in DC so my vote won't matter but they refuse to have anyone in their home who casts a vote for Trump. I didn't volunteer who I was voting for but they knew I am a registered Republican and harassed me until I told them. I think it's interesting that liberals who preach acceptance can be so unaccepting and my DC Republican friends are more open to other opinions without getting angry or judgmental.

Yep -- the only hate I see in this thread is from supposedly tolerant people directing their venom toward the OP. I have a gay relative. I don't hate her. But I disagree with some of the choices she's made. She doesn't have to agree with the choices I've made. We still talk. We still love each other. I'm not afraid of having a different opinion than most people. If that makes you want to call me names, so be it.

What choices? You don't have to like a person just because they are gay. But if the "choices" are their sexuality then that is ignorant and not a reason to dislike anythhrinf about them.

And no, I am sorry, but not tolerating hate and discrimination is NOT "being intolerant." That is a stupid, stupid argument that conservatives insist on using.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just don't get why gays think people need to accept gays in their private lives.

OP isn't refusing to hire gays, harassing them at work, looking to deny them civil rights, campaigning to overturn gay marriage, rounding up neighbors to chase out the gays who bought next door, or doing anything to affect actual RIGHTS that gays have.

She just doesn't want gays in her personal, most intimate life.

Why do gays get to dictate who people can have in their lives?

You're gay. Fine. You should have all the same rights as everyone else. But this whole idea that people have to welcome you and your lover into their lives and celebrate you is so childish.

Some people are not going to like or befriend you because your homosexuality makes them uncomfortable. As a racial minority, I've had whites (including gay whites!) not welcome me into their social circles.

There is no right or entitlement to others' love.

Deal with it.

The OP's post isn't about welcoming LGBT people into her social circle. It isn't about not befriending a new neighbor or co-worker who happens to be gay. It is about her relationship with her brother. She disapproves of her brother's SO because the SO is the "wrong" sex. It is comparable to a family member who disapproves of your SO because s/he is a member of a different race, culture, ethnicity, religion, etc. In this case, her disapproval is so strong that she is only willing to have a relationship with her brother if he pretends the SO doesn't exist. No one expects OP to become best friends with her brother's SO. But she is expected to give her brother and his SO the basic respect of acknowledging/accepting their relationship.

MIL/FIL won't talk to me because I'm voting for Trump. I am fine with them voting for Clinton. I live in DC so my vote won't matter but they refuse to have anyone in their home who casts a vote for Trump. I didn't volunteer who I was voting for but they knew I am a registered Republican and harassed me until I told them. I think it's interesting that liberals who preach acceptance can be so unaccepting and my DC Republican friends are more open to other opinions without getting angry or judgmental.

Trump is not like any other candidate. It is not the same as accepting someone voting for Bush or something. But regardless, since you attempted to change the topic and slam liberals at once, you can choose who to vote for but not your sexuality. Being a trump supporter isn't at the core of your existence. I hope.

PP was not slamming liberals but made a great point. Research backs me up. The vast, vast majority of people who are raised by 2 registered democrats are democrats. The vast, vast majority of people who are raised by 2 registered republicans are republicans. Your party affiliation is more similar to your religion (which you also choose, but you should 100% accept people of every religion). And, for some people (including bi-sexuals, by definition), they choose who to love, but that does not mean you should discriminate against them just because they choose someone of the same gender (or of different genders, for that matter). I have long said that our society has fought to give religions equal rights (the foundation of our nation) and then races equal rights (100 years later) AND THEN women equal rights (almost another 100 years), and slowly interracial and interfaith couples, and now finally to allow gay marriage ... BUT we still openly discriminate against many people and it is 100% politically correct to do so and it shouldn't be:

1) People of the opposite political affiliation
2) Polygamous couples (why can't they choose to marry who they love -- just because they love more than one person?)
3) Immigrants (especially illegal ones -- who I get broke a law, but that doesn't deserve the type of shaming they receive)

Let's use this post to learn to love everyone and yes, Trump supporters are included. Just because someone doesn't want to vote for Hillary Clinton does not make them a bad person. (I agree that Trump is not like any other candidate, but Hillary Clinton with email issues, Clinton Foundation issues, and honesty issues isn't like any other candidate -- and that is someone is coming from someone who is voting for her == albeit while holding my nose!).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just don't get why gays think people need to accept gays in their private lives.

OP isn't refusing to hire gays, harassing them at work, looking to deny them civil rights, campaigning to overturn gay marriage, rounding up neighbors to chase out the gays who bought next door, or doing anything to affect actual RIGHTS that gays have.

She just doesn't want gays in her personal, most intimate life.

Why do gays get to dictate who people can have in their lives?

You're gay. Fine. You should have all the same rights as everyone else. But this whole idea that people have to welcome you and your lover into their lives and celebrate you is so childish.

Some people are not going to like or befriend you because your homosexuality makes them uncomfortable. As a racial minority, I've had whites (including gay whites!) not welcome me into their social circles.

There is no right or entitlement to others' love.

Deal with it.

The OP's post isn't about welcoming LGBT people into her social circle. It isn't about not befriending a new neighbor or co-worker who happens to be gay. It is about her relationship with her brother. She disapproves of her brother's SO because the SO is the "wrong" sex. It is comparable to a family member who disapproves of your SO because s/he is a member of a different race, culture, ethnicity, religion, etc. In this case, her disapproval is so strong that she is only willing to have a relationship with her brother if he pretends the SO doesn't exist. No one expects OP to become best friends with her brother's SO. But she is expected to give her brother and his SO the basic respect of acknowledging/accepting their relationship.

MIL/FIL won't talk to me because I'm voting for Trump. I am fine with them voting for Clinton. I live in DC so my vote won't matter but they refuse to have anyone in their home who casts a vote for Trump. I didn't volunteer who I was voting for but they knew I am a registered Republican and harassed me until I told them. I think it's interesting that liberals who preach acceptance can be so unaccepting and my DC Republican friends are more open to other opinions without getting angry or judgmental.

Yep -- the only hate I see in this thread is from supposedly tolerant people directing their venom toward the OP. I have a gay relative. I don't hate her. But I disagree with some of the choices she's made. She doesn't have to agree with the choices I've made. We still talk. We still love each other. I'm not afraid of having a different opinion than most people. If that makes you want to call me names, so be it.

What choices? You don't have to like a person just because they are gay. But if the "choices" are their sexuality then that is ignorant and not a reason to dislike anythhrinf about them.

And no, I am sorry, but not tolerating hate and discrimination is NOT "being intolerant." That is a stupid, stupid argument that conservatives insist on using.

PP did not say tolerate hate -- but to tolerate someone who uses their right to vote for someone other than you choose to use your right to vote to vote for. 50% of the country is not full of hate and discrimination and yet 50% of the country (more or less) votes for one party and 50% of the country (who is also not full of hate and discrimination) votes for the other party. To say that a conservative is full of hate & discrimination is equally ignorant as saying a democrat is full of welfare moms and moochers of our society.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just don't get why gays think people need to accept gays in their private lives.

OP isn't refusing to hire gays, harassing them at work, looking to deny them civil rights, campaigning to overturn gay marriage, rounding up neighbors to chase out the gays who bought next door, or doing anything to affect actual RIGHTS that gays have.

She just doesn't want gays in her personal, most intimate life.

Why do gays get to dictate who people can have in their lives?

You're gay. Fine. You should have all the same rights as everyone else. But this whole idea that people have to welcome you and your lover into their lives and celebrate you is so childish.

Some people are not going to like or befriend you because your homosexuality makes them uncomfortable. As a racial minority, I've had whites (including gay whites!) not welcome me into their social circles.

There is no right or entitlement to others' love.

Deal with it.

The OP's post isn't about welcoming LGBT people into her social circle. It isn't about not befriending a new neighbor or co-worker who happens to be gay. It is about her relationship with her brother. She disapproves of her brother's SO because the SO is the "wrong" sex. It is comparable to a family member who disapproves of your SO because s/he is a member of a different race, culture, ethnicity, religion, etc. In this case, her disapproval is so strong that she is only willing to have a relationship with her brother if he pretends the SO doesn't exist. No one expects OP to become best friends with her brother's SO. But she is expected to give her brother and his SO the basic respect of acknowledging/accepting their relationship.

MIL/FIL won't talk to me because I'm voting for Trump. I am fine with them voting for Clinton. I live in DC so my vote won't matter but they refuse to have anyone in their home who casts a vote for Trump. I didn't volunteer who I was voting for but they knew I am a registered Republican and harassed me until I told them. I think it's interesting that liberals who preach acceptance can be so unaccepting and my DC Republican friends are more open to other opinions without getting angry or judgmental.

Yep -- the only hate I see in this thread is from supposedly tolerant people directing their venom toward the OP. I have a gay relative. I don't hate her. But I disagree with some of the choices she's made. She doesn't have to agree with the choices I've made. We still talk. We still love each other. I'm not afraid of having a different opinion than most people. If that makes you want to call me names, so be it.

What choices? You don't have to like a person just because they are gay. But if the "choices" are their sexuality then that is ignorant and not a reason to dislike anythhrinf about them.

And no, I am sorry, but not tolerating hate and discrimination is NOT "being intolerant." That is a stupid, stupid argument that conservatives insist on using.

PP did not say tolerate hate -- but to tolerate someone who uses their right to vote for someone other than you choose to use your right to vote to vote for. 50% of the country is not full of hate and discrimination and yet 50% of the country (more or less) votes for one party and 50% of the country (who is also not full of hate and discrimination) votes for the other party. To say that a conservative is full of hate & discrimination is equally ignorant as saying a democrat is full of welfare moms and moochers of our society.

You've made this weirdly about politics. Are you the person who turns every thread to Trump!

You also missed the point. The point is there are many people of the conservative persuasion who dislike or outright hate minorities, think they don't deserve equal rights, etc and think that when theyre called out on their bigotry, that is just people being intolerant of them and gosh darn that isn't fair.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just don't get why gays think people need to accept gays in their private lives.

OP isn't refusing to hire gays, harassing them at work, looking to deny them civil rights, campaigning to overturn gay marriage, rounding up neighbors to chase out the gays who bought next door, or doing anything to affect actual RIGHTS that gays have.

She just doesn't want gays in her personal, most intimate life.

Why do gays get to dictate who people can have in their lives?

You're gay. Fine. You should have all the same rights as everyone else. But this whole idea that people have to welcome you and your lover into their lives and celebrate you is so childish.

Some people are not going to like or befriend you because your homosexuality makes them uncomfortable. As a racial minority, I've had whites (including gay whites!) not welcome me into their social circles.

There is no right or entitlement to others' love.

Deal with it.

The OP's post isn't about welcoming LGBT people into her social circle. It isn't about not befriending a new neighbor or co-worker who happens to be gay. It is about her relationship with her brother. She disapproves of her brother's SO because the SO is the "wrong" sex. It is comparable to a family member who disapproves of your SO because s/he is a member of a different race, culture, ethnicity, religion, etc. In this case, her disapproval is so strong that she is only willing to have a relationship with her brother if he pretends the SO doesn't exist. No one expects OP to become best friends with her brother's SO. But she is expected to give her brother and his SO the basic respect of acknowledging/accepting their relationship.

MIL/FIL won't talk to me because I'm voting for Trump. I am fine with them voting for Clinton. I live in DC so my vote won't matter but they refuse to have anyone in their home who casts a vote for Trump. I didn't volunteer who I was voting for but they knew I am a registered Republican and harassed me until I told them. I think it's interesting that liberals who preach acceptance can be so unaccepting and my DC Republican friends are more open to other opinions without getting angry or judgmental.

Yep -- the only hate I see in this thread is from supposedly tolerant people directing their venom toward the OP. I have a gay relative. I don't hate her. But I disagree with some of the choices she's made. She doesn't have to agree with the choices I've made. We still talk. We still love each other. I'm not afraid of having a different opinion than most people. If that makes you want to call me names, so be it.

The choices you disagree with- do they concern her sexuality or not? People can agree to disagree about most things in life without being homophobic- ie. finances, career, education, etc. After all, most life decisions don't actually concern our sexuality. In that case, it's no different than a straight cousin who took a life path that you wouldn't have taken. Or you think her sexuality is an inherently destructive lifestyle choice? Do you ask her to pretend her SO (if she has one) doesn't exist? Is your relationship with your cousin conditional upon her not mentioning her romantic/familial life with her SO? Do you ask her to go back into the closet/pretend she's straight when you two talk? This is what the OP wants to do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Referring to gay people as "the gays" when using it as "the gays want acceptance! The Gays think they're entitled! I don't know why the gays have to be so annoying!" IS homophobia. It sounds like you don't know what it means.

I use the term "the gays" or "a gay" frequently. I find it amusing. When my teen told me she is a lesbian, I asked her if she was "one of them queers." We find it funny.

I am probably the least homophobic person on the planet. I've dated women and men, marched in protests and had babies for gay couples.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Referring to gay people as "the gays" when using it as "the gays want acceptance! The Gays think they're entitled! I don't know why the gays have to be so annoying!" IS homophobia. It sounds like you don't know what it means.

I use the term "the gays" or "a gay" frequently. I find it amusing. When my teen told me she is a lesbian, I asked her if she was "one of them queers." We find it funny.

I am probably the least homophobic person on the planet. I've dated women and men, marched in protests and had babies for gay couples.

So you get the difference between what you do and what the pp is referencing