Atheist bil won’t allow 3 year old nephew to receive a gift during holidays

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:And what's att this stuff about upsetting the "elderly grandma." Since when should we protect elderly people from getting upset?

They have lots of life experience and have been upset many times. They know that times change and people change and remember, they were young once, too and know how that feels.

shame on Grandma is she's using her advanced age to get her way. and shame on the others if they are using Grandma to force their will on others.

What's ALL this stuff....

[Anonymous]

Yeah - I think these folks need to pray on their intentions here.

[Anonymous]

He will survive

[Anonymous]

Buy your nephew a gift and give it to him on December 23rd, unwrapped. Happy Friday! Let your his parents deal with his feelings on Christmas, it's not your responsibility.

[Anonymous]

Atheism is a culture.

I personally enjoy celebrating Christmas as an anthropological lesson in myths with my kids, but hey- to each their own.

Also- we love our kids unconditionally and teach them personal responsibility over fear of a mythical god’s wrath.

Oh- and we have Sundays free to you know, spend with each other instead of shuttling them off to Sunday school- because we love each other and enjoy each others company.

So it’s a culture. Family first over tithing and lies.

This being said- there is always an a$$ in the family- and it turns out: you’re it!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Atheism is a culture.

I personally enjoy celebrating Christmas as an anthropological lesson in myths with my kids, but hey- to each their own.

Also- we love our kids unconditionally and teach them personal responsibility over fear of a mythical god’s wrath.

Oh- and we have Sundays free to you know, spend with each other instead of shuttling them off to Sunday school- because we love each other and enjoy each others company.

So it’s a culture. Family first over tithing and lies.

This being said- there is always an a$$ in the family- and it turns out: you’re it!

You sound smug and insufferable....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Atheism is a culture.

I personally enjoy celebrating Christmas as an anthropological lesson in myths with my kids, but hey- to each their own.

Also- we love our kids unconditionally and teach them personal responsibility over fear of a mythical god’s wrath.

Oh- and we have Sundays free to you know, spend with each other instead of shuttling them off to Sunday school- because we love each other and enjoy each others company.

So it’s a culture. Family first over tithing and lies.

This being said- there is always an a$$ in the family- and it turns out: you’re it!

You sound smug and insufferable....

What specifically did pp say that sounded smug and insufferable to you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Atheism is a culture.

I personally enjoy celebrating Christmas as an anthropological lesson in myths with my kids, but hey- to each their own.

Also- we love our kids unconditionally and teach them personal responsibility over fear of a mythical god’s wrath.

Oh- and we have Sundays free to you know, spend with each other instead of shuttling them off to Sunday school- because we love each other and enjoy each others company.

So it’s a culture. Family first over tithing and lies.

This being said- there is always an a$$ in the family- and it turns out: you’re it!

You sound smug and insufferable....

What specifically did pp say that sounded smug and insufferable to you?

DP. Pretty much the whole thing....

[Anonymous]

dp, where to start?

people who aend their kids to Sunday School don’t want to spend time with their kids or love them?

mythical God?

Church is about tithing and lies?

People who are religious don’t teach personal responsibility to their kids?

Atheism is a culture of Family first, and religious people do not put family first because they attend church and believe in God?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you are so concerned about Larlo - although a lot of energy here has been about how the adult grandmother feels, but if you are sooo concerned about how this child feels the best thing you can do is to provide a loving and accepting environment for his whole family. You can only control how YOU behave. So if Larlo gets upset you don’t say “mommy and daddy wouldn’t let us give you a gift” you provide a distraction. Take him to pet the dog or show him a magic trick. He’s only 3. It will pass. As he gets older his parents will explain things to him and his expectations will be different. Maybe he will be resentful but that’s not your problem. This child is a member of your family and your job is to love him and his parents in spite of your fundamental differences. You teach him about generosity of spirit and unconditional love.

Why is it wrong to be concerned about Larlo?

Literally no one said it was wrong to be concerned about Larlo - the OP seemed more concerned about her mother than Larlo frankly.

Op (me) is concerned for both.

Larlo deserves a Christmas gift with his family. It won’t hurt anything.

To the posters above who advised to distract Larlo during gift opening; that’s on his parents. They want larlo to live as they choose, they can deal with the ramifications of their choices. It’s their choice! They can deal. Honestly nothing is going to placate a child in this situation.

Nobody deserves gifts, ever. They are literally gratuitous by definition. If you are raising your kids to feel entitled to gifts and to expect them, then that’s on you.

A child is perfectly capable of understanding and accepting that he’s not getting a gift for a holiday that he doesn’t celebrate. If not, then again - parents’ fault.

Finally, even if the kid did get upset, IT IS OK AND NORMAL FOR KIDS TO FEEL BRIEFLY UPSET! We don’t have to go to extreme measures to avoid it. If kids are allowed to experience and handle disappointment early on, maybe they won’t end up like this grandma who can’t cope with not getting her way on Christmas.

It’s awful to disappoint and upset a kid at Christmas, and you get jerk bonus points for repeatedly saying elderly grandma has issues for wanting grandchild to have a Christmas gift with his cousins.

They don’t celebrate Christmas! So it is not disappointing!! Would you insist in giving a Christmas gift to a kid who is Jewish or Muslim? Or someone who is Christian but does not believe in gift giving? Kids learn what their culture is and what to expect.

+1

We're in a big multicultural family where some members don't celebrate Christmas, some do the tree and gift giving but nothing religious, and some celebrate it as a religious holiday. Our kids are being raised Jewish. They understood that when we went to see the grandparents over winter break, some of the cousins would be celebrating and would receive Christmas presents. Even from a very young age, our kids were fine with this. It was basically like going to someone else's birthday party.

We stopped going to the grandparents' for winter break after someone decided our kids were really missing out and made them personalized Christmas stockings. It felt really disrespectful and dismissive of our preferences, and it was clearly not for our kids, who didn't have a problem celebrating Christmas for their cousins' sake.

Just respect the parents' wishes, OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:dp, where to start?

people who aend their kids to Sunday School don’t want to spend time with their kids or love them?

mythical God?

Church is about tithing and lies?

People who are religious don’t teach personal responsibility to their kids?

Atheism is a culture of Family first, and religious people do not put family first because they attend church and believe in God?

I’m the DP and yes, the smugness and incomprehension were sort of exhausting so I let it drop. Thanks for filling in the blanks….

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:dp, where to start?

people who aend their kids to Sunday School don’t want to spend time with their kids or love them?

mythical God?

Church is about tithing and lies?

People who are religious don’t teach personal responsibility to their kids?

Atheism is a culture of Family first, and religious people do not put family first because they attend church and believe in God?

Pp is a smug atheist. Not all atheists are that way. Many religious people are smug too, but certainly not all of them.

Some people, irrespective of their religious affiliation, are smug. Some Christians are smug because they think they are going to spend an eternity in heaven, while atheists burn for eternity in hell.

Some atheists are smug because they have figured out that there is not a God and think that anyone who still believes is not as smart as they are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:dp, where to start?

people who aend their kids to Sunday School don’t want to spend time with their kids or love them?

mythical God?

Church is about tithing and lies?

People who are religious don’t teach personal responsibility to their kids?

Atheism is a culture of Family first, and religious people do not put family first because they attend church and believe in God?

Pp is a smug atheist. Not all atheists are that way. Many religious people are smug too, but certainly not all of them.

Some people, irrespective of their religious affiliation, are smug. Some Christians are smug because they think they are going to spend an eternity in heaven, while atheists burn for eternity in hell.

Some atheists are smug because they have figured out that there is not a God and think that anyone who still believes is not as smart as they are.

Again with the burning in hell? Christians don’t know who is “going to hell.” And burning? Lots of Christians don’t believe anyone will burn in hell. That’s certainly not what my religion believes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Atheism is a culture.

I personally enjoy celebrating Christmas as an anthropological lesson in myths with my kids, but hey- to each their own.

Also- we love our kids unconditionally and teach them personal responsibility over fear of a mythical god’s wrath.

Oh- and we have Sundays free to you know, spend with each other instead of shuttling them off to Sunday school- because we love each other and enjoy each others company.

So it’s a culture. Family first over tithing and lies.

This being said- there is always an a$$ in the family- and it turns out: you’re it!

You sound smug and insufferable....

What specifically did pp say that sounded smug and insufferable to you?

I'm an atheist and I found the entire post smug and insufferable. The intolerance is apparent on the face of the post. If you cannot see it, you're trolling

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:dp, where to start?

people who aend their kids to Sunday School don’t want to spend time with their kids or love them?

mythical God?

Church is about tithing and lies?

People who are religious don’t teach personal responsibility to their kids?

Atheism is a culture of Family first, and religious people do not put family first because they attend church and believe in God?

Pp is a smug atheist. Not all atheists are that way. Many religious people are smug too, but certainly not all of them.

Some people, irrespective of their religious affiliation, are smug. Some Christians are smug because they think they are going to spend an eternity in heaven, while atheists burn for eternity in hell.

Some atheists are smug because they have figured out that there is not a God and think that anyone who still believes is not as smart as they are.

Again with the burning in hell? Christians don’t know who is “going to hell.” And burning? Lots of Christians don’t believe anyone will burn in hell. That’s certainly not what my religion believes.

You don’t represent all religious people.