Less successful sister is acting like she's the de facto owner of dad's beach house

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Anonymous wrote:You have your own friggin beach house. Dammit. Count your blessings, let dad give her the beach house. Why are you so jealous???

Because she has saved and made sacrifices to own the beach house, whereas the sister hasn’t.

Yeah but how often is OP visiting her dad and helping him out? Maybe the sister is helping care for him or spends time with him and that provides companionship and comfort to him?

The sister doesn't even hold a job!

So what? She still is showing up for the father. How ofter in OP visiting?

If a $1m house wasn't at stake, would she be there?

Would OP care if her dad didn’t own a mortgage free property? I wonder if the other sibling also cares or this is just an OP issue.

So we have a sister who is unemployed -vs- OP works, OP's husband works, OP and husband have stable income and good credit history to qualify for a pricey second mortgage, OP and husband went out of their way to buy a vacation home next to her father. And you think OP is the hustler here? Quite a long con.

This forum is full of unhappy trolls who see themselves in the scheming freeloader sister. Just be passive, let a sibling steal a million dollars from you. No big deal. Yeah, right.

Nobody is stealing ANYTHING from her. Not one cent of it is her money, nor is she entitled to it.

This. Right. Here. All of you people acting like you are owed your parents' money--now or in the future--are gross.

Keep in mind that your parents have every right to do with their money and property as they please, including donating it all to charity or leaving it to a cat. Literally, a cat.

This. Reminds me I need to set up a will to provide a stipend for my cats.

But seriously, just ask your dad whether he intends on leaving the house to all three of you or just your sister. It’s really not your business but I feel like given all the drama it’s the easiest way to move on. My parents used to talk about inheritance when we were younger until we pointed out how much elder care costs and that we’d prefer they just focus on funding their own end of life, and that’d be the best inheritance gift we could get.

Yes to the funding of elder care! I learned my lesson when MIL and her brother planned on using inheritance from their mother for various things. Well, their mom lived into her late 90s, 20 of those years in assisted living-type facilities. By the end, MIL and her sibling were shelling out their own money for funeral costs. Their mother had a couple million (and survivor benefits from her husband’s nice pension) when she went into assisted living. People really underestimate how expensive those later years are in many cases.

Yes, the best gift we can give our children is to save and invest carefully to have enough to pay for our own care as we age. I hope to never be a burden to my children. My parents and in-laws did a good job of doing this kind of planning and I hope to follow their examples.

Right there with you. My folks both worked hard and when they quit working at age 70 had hundreds of thousands of dollars saved, which was more money than they ever imagined having. They expected this would be a lovely windfall to us kids when they passed. Sixteen years later it is all long gone and the bills just keep coming.

The best gift we can give our children is about a week of illness (to give people time to travel) before a rapid death in our sleep.