Anyone facing jealous friends now that your kids are in private school?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You don’t think $1 million a year is impressive???? I sure do. Most people I know who make that much are working lots of hours and sacrificing time with their families. That’s what people do to make that much money. There are trade offs.

No. Not really. And most lawyers earn it in very unappetizing ways. Grinding on documents, or compliance programs or litigation prep. I feel sorry for the BigLaw parents. It’s a tough grind.

Do you know many big law partners?? Like actual partners, not of counsel or non equity or what have you? They are not doing what you think they’re doing. This is what junior associates do. The ones I know, who earn a lot and are at actual big law firms, do a lot of advisory work, presentations and deal making. I don’t think you have much salient experience.

I know the managing partners of the most prominent DC and NY based firms. They grind. I know this bc they grind for me. I don’t need “presentations” as I do the thinking. What I need is massive amounts of data and documents organized, understood and able to be used and I often need it done in hours. My lawyers and the lawyer parents of the kids at my kids schools are not doing glamorous things all the time, mostly they are grinding.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You don’t think $1 million a year is impressive???? I sure do. Most people I know who make that much are working lots of hours and sacrificing time with their families. That’s what people do to make that much money. There are trade offs.

No. Not really. And most lawyers earn it in very unappetizing ways. Grinding on documents, or compliance programs or litigation prep. I feel sorry for the BigLaw parents. It’s a tough grind.

Do you know many big law partners?? Like actual partners, not of counsel or non equity or what have you? They are not doing what you think they’re doing. This is what junior associates do. The ones I know, who earn a lot and are at actual big law firms, do a lot of advisory work, presentations and deal making. I don’t think you have much salient experience.

I look down on lawyers. It is an awful job that is very unappealing.

Private schools are full of lawyer parents. Do you look down at your kids’ friends’ parents??

I try to help them out with business and then support. They are not usually the ones at sports or mid-week events. They are billing hours.

[Anonymous]

My son goes to a pubic magnet school. I have friends with kids in elite private schools, religious private schools, charter schools and their zoned public schools in VA, MoCo, PGCPS, and DC, and I have nothing to say about another family's educational decisions. Get new friends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You don’t think $1 million a year is impressive???? I sure do. Most people I know who make that much are working lots of hours and sacrificing time with their families. That’s what people do to make that much money. There are trade offs.

No. Not really. And most lawyers earn it in very unappetizing ways. Grinding on documents, or compliance programs or litigation prep. I feel sorry for the BigLaw parents. It’s a tough grind.

Do you know many big law partners?? Like actual partners, not of counsel or non equity or what have you? They are not doing what you think they’re doing. This is what junior associates do. The ones I know, who earn a lot and are at actual big law firms, do a lot of advisory work, presentations and deal making. I don’t think you have much salient experience.

I know the managing partners of the most prominent DC and NY based firms. They grind. I know this bc they grind for me. I don’t need “presentations” as I do the thinking. What I need is massive amounts of data and documents organized, understood and able to be used and I often need it done in hours. My lawyers and the lawyer parents of the kids at my kids schools are not doing glamorous things all the time, mostly they are grinding.

Have another glass of wine. What a load of crap!

[Anonymous]

I find this hard to believe. We were in public for about five years and were good friends with a family that had left our public and put all three of their children (full pay) in private school. They were very widely accepted and included in all of the social activities in the neighborhood - also never acted stuck up, bragged, etc. In fact, couple of years later during the pandemic, we pulled our kid out and put her in the same school as this family. No one treated them differently - I saw their kids at the pool with the public school kids/friends; trick or treating every year with our kids and most of the birthday parties.

[Anonymous]

Perhaps they are not jealous, but it makes them feel uncomfortable at some level. I’ve found it is best to focus on you and your plan, as the rest is just distraction. Don’t worry about it too much.

[Anonymous]

After many such instances of jealousy and unkind responses, we have learned it's generally easier to just avoid socializing with the public school set.

It's sad that people see private school as a political statement or as a negative judgment about their life choices, but it's true in my experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:After many such instances of jealousy and unkind responses, we have learned it's generally easier to just avoid socializing with the public school set.

It's sad that people see private school as a political statement or as a negative judgment about their life choices, but it's true in my experience.

I agree with this but I don't think it's jealousy, I think it's deep insecurity.
When we switched to Catholic school the first question was "What's wrong with (public)"? Then "Are you guys secret Trumpers or something?" It bothers them that you're saying their choice isn't good enough for your kid. And at least in my area, they treat support for public school like a religion. People have lawn signs that say "We love our (local public) teachers" and such.

[Anonymous]

No one cares where your kids go to school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No one cares where your kids go to school.

This. Main Character Syndrome is never a good look.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You don’t think $1 million a year is impressive???? I sure do. Most people I know who make that much are working lots of hours and sacrificing time with their families. That’s what people do to make that much money. There are trade offs.

No. Not really. And most lawyers earn it in very unappetizing ways. Grinding on documents, or compliance programs or litigation prep. I feel sorry for the BigLaw parents. It’s a tough grind.

Do you know many big law partners?? Like actual partners, not of counsel or non equity or what have you? They are not doing what you think they’re doing. This is what junior associates do. The ones I know, who earn a lot and are at actual big law firms, do a lot of advisory work, presentations and deal making. I don’t think you have much salient experience.

I know the managing partners of the most prominent DC and NY based firms. They grind. I know this bc they grind for me. I don’t need “presentations” as I do the thinking. What I need is massive amounts of data and documents organized, understood and able to be used and I often need it done in hours. My lawyers and the lawyer parents of the kids at my kids schools are not doing glamorous things all the time, mostly they are grinding.

Have another glass of wine. What a load of crap!

Can you tell them it’s a load of crap when they bill me? You literally know nothing yet pop off. That is the load of crap.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No one cares where your kids go to school.

Oh yes, the public school parents most definitely do. I think it is both jealousy and insecurity on their part. What baffles me is why they feel it is okay to be snarky.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No one cares where your kids go to school.

Oh yes, the public school parents most definitely do. I think it is both jealousy and insecurity on their part. What baffles me is why they feel it is okay to be snarky.

I've been both a public and private school parent. Nobody cares about where your kid goes to school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No one cares where your kids go to school.

Oh yes, the public school parents most definitely do. I think it is both jealousy and insecurity on their part. What baffles me is why they feel it is okay to be snarky.

I've been both a public and private school parent. Nobody cares about where your kid goes to school.

Agreed. People are too busy to give it more than a passing thought.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No one cares where your kids go to school.

Oh yes, the public school parents most definitely do. I think it is both jealousy and insecurity on their part. What baffles me is why they feel it is okay to be snarky.

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