Making SAHM get job to pay for private school

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do think it is a little ridiculous to both not work and insist on private school.

Agree. I’m a SAHM and private school would be a non-starter with my husband. He doesn’t quite make $500/k but it wouldn’t matter to him if he did. He is focused on college and retirement savings and generational wealth building. Private secondary school is just a badge like a luxury car or country club (we don’t those either.)

This kind of thinking is why you will never generate true generational wealth.

This isn’t true as well.

A lot of people don’t know or understand what generational wealth is.

A lot of people also don’t understand the difference between generational wealth and generational assets. Sure, buy a few rental properties and pass them down to your kids. But that’s not real generational wealth.

This!!! Thank you!!!

OK. So enlighten us what "real generational wealth" is. I'm guessing it somehow involves sending your kids to a tony private school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Doesn't matter if she gets lifetime alimony. Its not going to keep in her in the same house with the same lifestyle AND pay for her kids to go to private school. A court is not going to force OP to pay for private school. OP's wife is better of staying, she knows it and he knows it which is why he holds the cards.

Okay so first of all, he does not hold all the cards because he too would be worse off in a divorce.

But more importantly, is this how people really look at all marriages? Sorting out which spouse holds the cards like they're freaking opponents in life? Despite OP's clearly dysfunctional marriage I would hope that he and his wife have at least have some sense of partnership.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do think it is a little ridiculous to both not work and insist on private school.

Agree. I’m a SAHM and private school would be a non-starter with my husband. He doesn’t quite make $500/k but it wouldn’t matter to him if he did. He is focused on college and retirement savings and generational wealth building. Private secondary school is just a badge like a luxury car or country club (we don’t those either.)

This kind of thinking is why you will never generate true generational wealth.

This isn’t true as well.

A lot of people don’t know or understand what generational wealth is.

A lot of people also don’t understand the difference between generational wealth and generational assets. Sure, buy a few rental properties and pass them down to your kids. But that’s not real generational wealth.

This!!! Thank you!!!

OK. So enlighten us what "real generational wealth" is. I'm guessing it somehow involves sending your kids to a tony private school.

Isn't it about being able to live off the interest of investments?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Doesn't matter if she gets lifetime alimony. Its not going to keep in her in the same house with the same lifestyle AND pay for her kids to go to private school. A court is not going to force OP to pay for private school. OP's wife is better of staying, she knows it and he knows it which is why he holds the cards.

Okay so first of all, he does not hold all the cards because he too would be worse off in a divorce.

But more importantly, is this how people really look at all marriages? Sorting out which spouse holds the cards like they're freaking opponents in life? Despite OP's clearly dysfunctional marriage I would hope that he and his wife have at least have some sense of partnership.

Clearly they don't have a partnership. And while yes, OP would be worse off financially in a divorce, he still has 500k coming in every year and the kids will only be minors a little while longer. Anyone denying he has the upper had here is delusional. Finacially they would both be better off to keep the status quo, but OP's wife doesn't really have any leverage to be making ultimatums.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Doesn't matter if she gets lifetime alimony. Its not going to keep in her in the same house with the same lifestyle AND pay for her kids to go to private school. A court is not going to force OP to pay for private school. OP's wife is better of staying, she knows it and he knows it which is why he holds the cards.

Okay so first of all, he does not hold all the cards because he too would be worse off in a divorce.

But more importantly, is this how people really look at all marriages? Sorting out which spouse holds the cards like they're freaking opponents in life? Despite OP's clearly dysfunctional marriage I would hope that he and his wife have at least have some sense of partnership.

10 years from now after a divorce he will still be making 500k, no longer have child support, and be finishing up paying for college for his kids. He won’t be supporting his ex-wife and probably will have a new wife. Meanwhile the sah wife stops getting alimony and child support and her quality of life is nowhere near her previous life. It isn’t fair but that is what my sister’s life has become. She really wishes now she had stayed married and put up with her ex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do think it is a little ridiculous to both not work and insist on private school.

Agree. I’m a SAHM and private school would be a non-starter with my husband. He doesn’t quite make $500/k but it wouldn’t matter to him if he did. He is focused on college and retirement savings and generational wealth building. Private secondary school is just a badge like a luxury car or country club (we don’t those either.)

This kind of thinking is why you will never generate true generational wealth.

This isn’t true as well.

A lot of people don’t know or understand what generational wealth is.

A lot of people also don’t understand the difference between generational wealth and generational assets. Sure, buy a few rental properties and pass them down to your kids. But that’s not real generational wealth.

This!!! Thank you!!!

OK. So enlighten us what "real generational wealth" is. I'm guessing it somehow involves sending your kids to a tony private school.

Isn't it about being able to live off the interest of investments?

I'm the PP right above you and I was referencing the bold. Clearly those who think we don't understand "generational wealth" are very pro private school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do think it is a little ridiculous to both not work and insist on private school.

Agree. I’m a SAHM and private school would be a non-starter with my husband. He doesn’t quite make $500/k but it wouldn’t matter to him if he did. He is focused on college and retirement savings and generational wealth building. Private secondary school is just a badge like a luxury car or country club (we don’t those either.)

This kind of thinking is why you will never generate true generational wealth.

This isn’t true as well.

A lot of people don’t know or understand what generational wealth is.

A lot of people also don’t understand the difference between generational wealth and generational assets. Sure, buy a few rental properties and pass them down to your kids. But that’s not real generational wealth.

This!!! Thank you!!!

OK. So enlighten us what "real generational wealth" is. I'm guessing it somehow involves sending your kids to a tony private school.

Isn't it about being able to live off the interest of investments?

I'm the PP right above you and I was referencing the bold. Clearly those who think we don't understand "generational wealth" are very pro private school.

Ah gotcha.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do think it is a little ridiculous to both not work and insist on private school.

Agree. I’m a SAHM and private school would be a non-starter with my husband. He doesn’t quite make $500/k but it wouldn’t matter to him if he did. He is focused on college and retirement savings and generational wealth building. Private secondary school is just a badge like a luxury car or country club (we don’t those either.)

This kind of thinking is why you will never generate true generational wealth.

This isn’t true as well.

A lot of people don’t know or understand what generational wealth is.

A lot of people also don’t understand the difference between generational wealth and generational assets. Sure, buy a few rental properties and pass them down to your kids. But that’s not real generational wealth.

This!!! Thank you!!!

OK. So enlighten us what "real generational wealth" is. I'm guessing it somehow involves sending your kids to a tony private school.

Isn't it about being able to live off the interest of investments?

NP. Why would anyone want their kids to loaf around living off of interest? How is that doing them any kind of service?

I am working on leaving my kids a great inheritance, but my main priority is teaching a kid to fish. My children are preschool age, but whether or not they go to private school will be completely based on to what extent the education and culture of the school contributes to self-reliance, curiosity, a bit of competition, and hard work. In my area, the public school's math team sends 10+ kids to HYPSM every year. The fancy private sends kids to rando liberal arts colleges no one has ever heard of. I really do not care that the parents of these kids are high profile and my kids to get access to that "network" because it turns out it is a network to spoiled nowheresville.

[Anonymous]

Please OP. You will likely be working those “extra” 3 yrs whether your kids go to private school for not. You sound resentful of your wife.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do think it is a little ridiculous to both not work and insist on private school.

Agree. I’m a SAHM and private school would be a non-starter with my husband. He doesn’t quite make $500/k but it wouldn’t matter to him if he did. He is focused on college and retirement savings and generational wealth building. Private secondary school is just a badge like a luxury car or country club (we don’t those either.)

This kind of thinking is why you will never generate true generational wealth.

This isn’t true as well.

A lot of people don’t know or understand what generational wealth is.

A lot of people also don’t understand the difference between generational wealth and generational assets. Sure, buy a few rental properties and pass them down to your kids. But that’s not real generational wealth.

This!!! Thank you!!!

OK. So enlighten us what "real generational wealth" is. I'm guessing it somehow involves sending your kids to a tony private school.

Isn't it about being able to live off the interest of investments?

NP. Why would anyone want their kids to loaf around living off of interest? How is that doing them any kind of service?

I am working on leaving my kids a great inheritance, but my main priority is teaching a kid to fish. My children are preschool age, but whether or not they go to private school will be completely based on to what extent the education and culture of the school contributes to self-reliance, curiosity, a bit of competition, and hard work. In my area, the public school's math team sends 10+ kids to HYPSM every year. The fancy private sends kids to rando liberal arts colleges no one has ever heard of. I really do not care that the parents of these kids are high profile and my kids to get access to that "network" because it turns out it is a network to spoiled nowheresville.

absolutely this. I've seen this in my life as well as the product of public schools, married to another product of public schools who went to HYPSM, and as as a private school teacher (where the college counselors basically sent everyone to random private liberal arts colleges.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do think it is a little ridiculous to both not work and insist on private school.

Agree. I’m a SAHM and private school would be a non-starter with my husband. He doesn’t quite make $500/k but it wouldn’t matter to him if he did. He is focused on college and retirement savings and generational wealth building. Private secondary school is just a badge like a luxury car or country club (we don’t those either.)

This kind of thinking is why you will never generate true generational wealth.

This isn’t true as well.

A lot of people don’t know or understand what generational wealth is.

A lot of people also don’t understand the difference between generational wealth and generational assets. Sure, buy a few rental properties and pass them down to your kids. But that’s not real generational wealth.

This!!! Thank you!!!

OK. So enlighten us what "real generational wealth" is. I'm guessing it somehow involves sending your kids to a tony private school.

Isn't it about being able to live off the interest of investments?

NP. Why would anyone want their kids to loaf around living off of interest? How is that doing them any kind of service?

I am working on leaving my kids a great inheritance, but my main priority is teaching a kid to fish. My children are preschool age, but whether or not they go to private school will be completely based on to what extent the education and culture of the school contributes to self-reliance, curiosity, a bit of competition, and hard work. In my area, the public school's math team sends 10+ kids to HYPSM every year. The fancy private sends kids to rando liberal arts colleges no one has ever heard of. I really do not care that the parents of these kids are high profile and my kids to get access to that "network" because it turns out it is a network to spoiled nowheresville.

I’m not saying I do, I’m just saying I thought that was the definition of generational wealth.

(Side note: I don’t think there should be any generational wealth, at least not according to this definition. Why tax hard workers when you can take the money from the dead? Like you say, it’ll be better for their kids)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do think it is a little ridiculous to both not work and insist on private school.

Agree. I’m a SAHM and private school would be a non-starter with my husband. He doesn’t quite make $500/k but it wouldn’t matter to him if he did. He is focused on college and retirement savings and generational wealth building. Private secondary school is just a badge like a luxury car or country club (we don’t those either.)

This kind of thinking is why you will never generate true generational wealth.

This isn’t true as well.

A lot of people don’t know or understand what generational wealth is.

A lot of people also don’t understand the difference between generational wealth and generational assets. Sure, buy a few rental properties and pass them down to your kids. But that’s not real generational wealth.

This!!! Thank you!!!

OK. So enlighten us what "real generational wealth" is. I'm guessing it somehow involves sending your kids to a tony private school.

Isn't it about being able to live off the interest of investments?

NP. Why would anyone want their kids to loaf around living off of interest? How is that doing them any kind of service?

I am working on leaving my kids a great inheritance, but my main priority is teaching a kid to fish. My children are preschool age, but whether or not they go to private school will be completely based on to what extent the education and culture of the school contributes to self-reliance, curiosity, a bit of competition, and hard work. In my area, the public school's math team sends 10+ kids to HYPSM every year. The fancy private sends kids to rando liberal arts colleges no one has ever heard of. I really do not care that the parents of these kids are high profile and my kids to get access to that "network" because it turns out it is a network to spoiled nowheresville.

I’m not saying I do, I’m just saying I thought that was the definition of generational wealth.

(Side note: I don’t think there should be any generational wealth, at least not according to this definition. Why tax hard workers when you can take the money from the dead? Like you say, it’ll be better for their kids)

Um, I am PP and from my point of view, that'd be a hard no for me. Nothing wastes resources as hard and fast as the government. Furthermore, it is unethical to tax the same money repeatedly. If I make it, I get to decide what happens to it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do think it is a little ridiculous to both not work and insist on private school.

Agree. I’m a SAHM and private school would be a non-starter with my husband. He doesn’t quite make $500/k but it wouldn’t matter to him if he did. He is focused on college and retirement savings and generational wealth building. Private secondary school is just a badge like a luxury car or country club (we don’t those either.)

This kind of thinking is why you will never generate true generational wealth.

This isn’t true as well.

A lot of people don’t know or understand what generational wealth is.

A lot of people also don’t understand the difference between generational wealth and generational assets. Sure, buy a few rental properties and pass them down to your kids. But that’s not real generational wealth.

This!!! Thank you!!!

OK. So enlighten us what "real generational wealth" is. I'm guessing it somehow involves sending your kids to a tony private school.

Isn't it about being able to live off the interest of investments?

NP. Why would anyone want their kids to loaf around living off of interest? How is that doing them any kind of service?

I am working on leaving my kids a great inheritance, but my main priority is teaching a kid to fish. My children are preschool age, but whether or not they go to private school will be completely based on to what extent the education and culture of the school contributes to self-reliance, curiosity, a bit of competition, and hard work. In my area, the public school's math team sends 10+ kids to HYPSM every year. The fancy private sends kids to rando liberal arts colleges no one has ever heard of. I really do not care that the parents of these kids are high profile and my kids to get access to that "network" because it turns out it is a network to spoiled nowheresville.

THIS. We are going to instead use the money to pay for grad school (if appropriate) and/or down payments on houses. Which will be far more useful than some random private secondary school that isn't as advanced as our top public.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do think it is a little ridiculous to both not work and insist on private school.

Agree. I’m a SAHM and private school would be a non-starter with my husband. He doesn’t quite make $500/k but it wouldn’t matter to him if he did. He is focused on college and retirement savings and generational wealth building. Private secondary school is just a badge like a luxury car or country club (we don’t those either.)

This kind of thinking is why you will never generate true generational wealth.

This isn’t true as well.

A lot of people don’t know or understand what generational wealth is.

A lot of people also don’t understand the difference between generational wealth and generational assets. Sure, buy a few rental properties and pass them down to your kids. But that’s not real generational wealth.

This!!! Thank you!!!

OK. So enlighten us what "real generational wealth" is. I'm guessing it somehow involves sending your kids to a tony private school.

Isn't it about being able to live off the interest of investments?

NP. Why would anyone want their kids to loaf around living off of interest? How is that doing them any kind of service?

I am working on leaving my kids a great inheritance, but my main priority is teaching a kid to fish. My children are preschool age, but whether or not they go to private school will be completely based on to what extent the education and culture of the school contributes to self-reliance, curiosity, a bit of competition, and hard work. In my area, the public school's math team sends 10+ kids to HYPSM every year. The fancy private sends kids to rando liberal arts colleges no one has ever heard of. I really do not care that the parents of these kids are high profile and my kids to get access to that "network" because it turns out it is a network to spoiled nowheresville.

My guess is that you don't know people with that kind of wealth if that is your idea of how it works. You can give your kids both a work ethic and drive to succeed and a steady stream of income that gives them so many more options in life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Doesn't matter if she gets lifetime alimony. Its not going to keep in her in the same house with the same lifestyle AND pay for her kids to go to private school. A court is not going to force OP to pay for private school. OP's wife is better of staying, she knows it and he knows it which is why he holds the cards.

Okay so first of all, he does not hold all the cards because he too would be worse off in a divorce.

But more importantly, is this how people really look at all marriages? Sorting out which spouse holds the cards like they're freaking opponents in life? Despite OP's clearly dysfunctional marriage I would hope that he and his wife have at least have some sense of partnership.

10 years from now after a divorce he will still be making 500k, no longer have child support, and be finishing up paying for college for his kids. He won’t be supporting his ex-wife and probably will have a new wife. Meanwhile the sah wife stops getting alimony and child support and her quality of life is nowhere near her previous life. It isn’t fair but that is what my sister’s life has become. She really wishes now she had stayed married and put up with her ex.

Is your sister jealous of the new wife?