Shocked at how many families in nice DMV neighborhoods are living in relatives' homes

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our kid (only-child) just finished kindergarten at a school in an upscale DMV neighborhood.

We've met at least a dozen families at our school who are living in a childhood home or a living in a house own by an elderly parent/relative and "paying rent" (whatever that means)

Though extracurricular activities we've met other families with the same arrangements in Chevy Chase, Bethesda, and upper NW DC. This is, in fact, pretty widespread.

So, if you're slogging away saving for that down payment, paying for child care and wondering "how do all these people do it????"....just know that this is one of the ways you're getting shut out. I'm honestly surprised at how widespread this is happening.

Yep, my friend moved into her DH's childhood home. The parents helped their son out and provide her/DH free babysitting to take trips.
I'm so jealous.
They really have the perfect set up.

With just three simple words, this PP has managed to encapsulate the OP's feelings -- resentment, bitterness and envy.

I'm. So. Jealous.

Envy is such an incredibly unattractive trait, as it conveys to the world that you've chosen to become rooted in bitterness, resentment, inferiority, and insecurity.

This post is predictable.

They always find a way to blame someone else for their own inadequacies & shortcomings, because they've deluded themselves into believing that life isn't fair.
They MUST live their lives as perpetual victims of unfairness & injustice⁸⁰.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't that the goal of this entire post?

It seemed like the OP was positively giddy for her GOTCHA! moment, in trying to expose the so-called "secrets" of legacy real estate in the DMV area (aka; inheretences of the rich & privileged).
However, it seems painfully obvious that OP was probably the only one who didn't know that the DMV has always been ripe with real estate legacies, and the three kind of people who react to them:

1. Those who get labeled entitled for having the benefit of legacy/nepo inheritances.
2. Those who feel bitter & resentful because they'll never receive those same privileges AND
3. Those who are happy for anyone who is fortunate enough to own their home... no matter how they got it.

Stop worrying so much about what other people have and how they got it.
Focus on yourself.

NP. I think you should take your own advice.

Envy/jealousy is not a "trait." It's a normal human emotion that is incredibly common. The PP you are quoting is a mentally healthy person experiencing a very normal thing-- someone she knows has some extremely valuable and beneficial things PP wishes she had. That's it. It happens to everyone, and is not a moral failing.

OP and others in this thread are experiencing that SUPER NORMAL felling regarding housing. This is totally unsurprising because we live on n an area with really expensive housing.

The takeaway here is not that people who feel this way are bad people who need your lessons in how to act or feel (also, I hope you can recognize the irony in telling people to focus on themselves and mind their own business while we're going in on the merit of their thoughts and feelings).

The take away is that being very fortunate, especially financially, is likely to involve jealousy. The end. It's just the reality and trade off to having a lot. There is no read n to freak out about it.

I'd still rather have a lot of money or a nice house (knowing friends and neighbors might envy me) so it's a tradeoff I'm happy with. Demanding that everyone be happy for you that you have so much more than them is deranged. And some people actually will be happy for you (while also feeling jealous). Humans are complex. But melting down over the idea that envy exists is so weird. Who cares? I 100% guarantee you feel envy sometimes too, you just won't admit it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our kid (only-child) just finished kindergarten at a school in an upscale DMV neighborhood.

We've met at least a dozen families at our school who are living in a childhood home or a living in a house own by an elderly parent/relative and "paying rent" (whatever that means)

Though extracurricular activities we've met other families with the same arrangements in Chevy Chase, Bethesda, and upper NW DC. This is, in fact, pretty widespread.

So, if you're slogging away saving for that down payment, paying for child care and wondering "how do all these people do it????"....just know that this is one of the ways you're getting shut out. I'm honestly surprised at how widespread this is happening.

Yep, my friend moved into her DH's childhood home. The parents helped their son out and provide her/DH free babysitting to take trips.
I'm so jealous.
They really have the perfect set up.

With just three simple words, this PP has managed to encapsulate the OP's feelings -- resentment, bitterness and envy.

I'm. So. Jealous.

Envy is such an incredibly unattractive trait, as it conveys to the world that you've chosen to become rooted in bitterness, resentment, inferiority, and insecurity.

This post is predictable.

They always find a way to blame someone else for their own inadequacies & shortcomings, because they've deluded themselves into believing that life isn't fair.
They MUST live their lives as perpetual victims of unfairness & injustice⁸⁰.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't that the goal of this entire post?

It seemed like the OP was positively giddy for her GOTCHA! moment, in trying to expose the so-called "secrets" of legacy real estate in the DMV area (aka; inheretences of the rich & privileged).
However, it seems painfully obvious that OP was probably the only one who didn't know that the DMV has always been ripe with real estate legacies, and the three kind of people who react to them:

1. Those who get labeled entitled for having the benefit of legacy/nepo inheritances.
2. Those who feel bitter & resentful because they'll never receive those same privileges AND
3. Those who are happy for anyone who is fortunate enough to own their home... no matter how they got it.

Stop worrying so much about what other people have and how they got it.
Focus on yourself.

Exactly. It's so transparent. Especially because said legacy/inheriting families will often have other advantages, like a built in-childhood social circle that the OP could never buy their way into. The world is unfair but seething over someone else getting blessings from their parents is truly pathetic

I don’t think OP is seething. It’s like watching a slow motion train wreck. My husband’s family was like this - all ivy educated society Mayflower types then a generation full of spending, alcohol and drugs squandered it all. People without purpose pick up bad habits.

I think they are. Because the harsh reality is, there's nothing trainwreck about a guy with an easy non-profit job and a trust fund living a great life in a nice Chevy Chase or Kalorama with his family. There's nothing trainwreck about belonging to a tony country or university club and socializing (and getting valuable connections) with your boarding school buddies. It can be infuriating and enraging to watch these people get handed all the things so many others have worked so hard for, striven their whole lives for. And these guys just get it handed to them on a silver platter, with a maddening insouciance that makes it even worse.

Ooo yeah, this is me. I’m not a train wreck and I haven’t squandered anything. I’m pretty responsible! Never been fired, arrested, genuinely pretty good at my job, etc etc. I just have like, $5m than I’ve earned and that’s not even counting any of the tuition etc. AND I have dramatically different retirement requirements, which really frees us to take entrepreneurial risks and do things like have a SAHP for a while.

I guess we’ll all get cancer?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will never sell my house in MoCo. When we retire, I will keep the house and have one of my adult children live in it. Financially it doesn't make sense to sell.

THIS. I am planning to move out of the area but has decided not to sell my house in Bethesda. Keeping it for the children.

Except most kids don’t want their parents’ house. All the old people around me in CC MD are amazed their kids don’t want their house, mainly because it was last updated 30’years ago and lots of deferred maintenance and the kids created lives elsewhere.

Talk to the kids and they wish the parents would just sell it and save them the hassle of cleaning out the house and selling it.

All the adult children on our block of CCMD are licking their chops to get back into their childhood homes. Proximity to great privates and great publics, easy commute to work, big yards and parks for their kids to play, what's there not to like?

We know of a couple of families who are within a few houses from their childhood homes. And one who actually had to buy their childhood home from a third party because their parents sold it and they're always complaining/ laughing about it

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our kid (only-child) just finished kindergarten at a school in an upscale DMV neighborhood.

We've met at least a dozen families at our school who are living in a childhood home or a living in a house own by an elderly parent/relative and "paying rent" (whatever that means)

Though extracurricular activities we've met other families with the same arrangements in Chevy Chase, Bethesda, and upper NW DC. This is, in fact, pretty widespread.

So, if you're slogging away saving for that down payment, paying for child care and wondering "how do all these people do it????"....just know that this is one of the ways you're getting shut out. I'm honestly surprised at how widespread this is happening.

Yep, my friend moved into her DH's childhood home. The parents helped their son out and provide her/DH free babysitting to take trips.
I'm so jealous.
They really have the perfect set up.

With just three simple words, this PP has managed to encapsulate the OP's feelings -- resentment, bitterness and envy.

I'm. So. Jealous.

Envy is such an incredibly unattractive trait, as it conveys to the world that you've chosen to become rooted in bitterness, resentment, inferiority, and insecurity.

This post is predictable.

They always find a way to blame someone else for their own inadequacies & shortcomings, because they've deluded themselves into believing that life isn't fair.
They MUST live their lives as perpetual victims of unfairness & injustice⁸⁰.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't that the goal of this entire post?

It seemed like the OP was positively giddy for her GOTCHA! moment, in trying to expose the so-called "secrets" of legacy real estate in the DMV area (aka; inheretences of the rich & privileged).
However, it seems painfully obvious that OP was probably the only one who didn't know that the DMV has always been ripe with real estate legacies, and the three kind of people who react to them:

1. Those who get labeled entitled for having the benefit of legacy/nepo inheritances.
2. Those who feel bitter & resentful because they'll never receive those same privileges AND
3. Those who are happy for anyone who is fortunate enough to own their home... no matter how they got it.

Stop worrying so much about what other people have and how they got it.
Focus on yourself.

Exactly. It's so transparent. Especially because said legacy/inheriting families will often have other advantages, like a built in-childhood social circle that the OP could never buy their way into. The world is unfair but seething over someone else getting blessings from their parents is truly pathetic

I don’t think OP is seething. It’s like watching a slow motion train wreck. My husband’s family was like this - all ivy educated society Mayflower types then a generation full of spending, alcohol and drugs squandered it all. People without purpose pick up bad habits.

I think they are. Because the harsh reality is, there's nothing trainwreck about a guy with an easy non-profit job and a trust fund living a great life in a nice Chevy Chase or Kalorama with his family. There's nothing trainwreck about belonging to a tony country or university club and socializing (and getting valuable connections) with your boarding school buddies. It can be infuriating and enraging to watch these people get handed all the things so many others have worked so hard for, striven their whole lives for. And these guys just get it handed to them on a silver platter, with a maddening insouciance that makes it even worse.

Ooo yeah, this is me. I’m not a train wreck and I haven’t squandered anything. I’m pretty responsible! Never been fired, arrested, genuinely pretty good at my job, etc etc. I just have like, $5m than I’ve earned and that’s not even counting any of the tuition etc. AND I have dramatically different retirement requirements, which really frees us to take entrepreneurial risks and do things like have a SAHP for a while.

I guess we’ll all get cancer?

Sorry $5m MORE than I’ve earned obviously

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our kid (only-child) just finished kindergarten at a school in an upscale DMV neighborhood.

We've met at least a dozen families at our school who are living in a childhood home or a living in a house own by an elderly parent/relative and "paying rent" (whatever that means)

Though extracurricular activities we've met other families with the same arrangements in Chevy Chase, Bethesda, and upper NW DC. This is, in fact, pretty widespread.

So, if you're slogging away saving for that down payment, paying for child care and wondering "how do all these people do it????"....just know that this is one of the ways you're getting shut out. I'm honestly surprised at how widespread this is happening.

Yep, my friend moved into her DH's childhood home. The parents helped their son out and provide her/DH free babysitting to take trips.
I'm so jealous.
They really have the perfect set up.

With just three simple words, this PP has managed to encapsulate the OP's feelings -- resentment, bitterness and envy.

I'm. So. Jealous.

Envy is such an incredibly unattractive trait, as it conveys to the world that you've chosen to become rooted in bitterness, resentment, inferiority, and insecurity.

This post is predictable.

They always find a way to blame someone else for their own inadequacies & shortcomings, because they've deluded themselves into believing that life isn't fair.
They MUST live their lives as perpetual victims of unfairness & injustice⁸⁰.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't that the goal of this entire post?

It seemed like the OP was positively giddy for her GOTCHA! moment, in trying to expose the so-called "secrets" of legacy real estate in the DMV area (aka; inheretences of the rich & privileged).
However, it seems painfully obvious that OP was probably the only one who didn't know that the DMV has always been ripe with real estate legacies, and the three kind of people who react to them:

1. Those who get labeled entitled for having the benefit of legacy/nepo inheritances.
2. Those who feel bitter & resentful because they'll never receive those same privileges AND
3. Those who are happy for anyone who is fortunate enough to own their home... no matter how they got it.

Stop worrying so much about what other people have and how they got it.
Focus on yourself.

Exactly. It's so transparent. Especially because said legacy/inheriting families will often have other advantages, like a built in-childhood social circle that the OP could never buy their way into. The world is unfair but seething over someone else getting blessings from their parents is truly pathetic

I don’t think OP is seething. It’s like watching a slow motion train wreck. My husband’s family was like this - all ivy educated society Mayflower types then a generation full of spending, alcohol and drugs squandered it all. People without purpose pick up bad habits.

I think they are. Because the harsh reality is, there's nothing trainwreck about a guy with an easy non-profit job and a trust fund living a great life in a nice Chevy Chase or Kalorama with his family. There's nothing trainwreck about belonging to a tony country or university club and socializing (and getting valuable connections) with your boarding school buddies. It can be infuriating and enraging to watch these people get handed all the things so many others have worked so hard for, striven their whole lives for. And these guys just get it handed to them on a silver platter, with a maddening insouciance that makes it even worse.

Ooo yeah, this is me. I’m not a train wreck and I haven’t squandered anything. I’m pretty responsible! Never been fired, arrested, genuinely pretty good at my job, etc etc. I just have like, $5m than I’ve earned and that’s not even counting any of the tuition etc. AND I have dramatically different retirement requirements, which really frees us to take entrepreneurial risks and do things like have a SAHP for a while.

I guess we’ll all get cancer?

Right. Which is probably the much more common story than the boozing drug addict trust fund kid who ruins their life because their parents paid for college. The unfair reality is that some people have a lot more advantages and get a lot of help in life. The emotionally mature response to this is to be happy for them and understand that no ill was done to you just because your parents werent rich and you had to earn every penny yourself. The hate for trust funders and old money types on here is just very predictable and frankly embarrassing. Envy is such a bad look

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will never sell my house in MoCo. When we retire, I will keep the house and have one of my adult children live in it. Financially it doesn't make sense to sell.

THIS. I am planning to move out of the area but has decided not to sell my house in Bethesda. Keeping it for the children.

Except most kids don’t want their parents’ house. All the old people around me in CC MD are amazed their kids don’t want their house, mainly because it was last updated 30’years ago and lots of deferred maintenance and the kids created lives elsewhere.

Talk to the kids and they wish the parents would just sell it and save them the hassle of cleaning out the house and selling it.

All the adult children on our block of CCMD are licking their chops to get back into their childhood homes. Proximity to great privates and great publics, easy commute to work, big yards and parks for their kids to play, what's there not to like?

We know of a couple of families who are within a few houses from their childhood homes. And one who actually had to buy their childhood home from a third party because their parents sold it and they're always complaining/ laughing about it

In theory they live elsewhere, no? Just curious how they think parents will give them a house but what will the siblings get? If parents have tons of $$$s so that they just give the kid that gets the house less cash, well then these adult children are wealthy and can buy their childhood home equivalent outright, no?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our kid (only-child) just finished kindergarten at a school in an upscale DMV neighborhood.

We've met at least a dozen families at our school who are living in a childhood home or a living in a house own by an elderly parent/relative and "paying rent" (whatever that means)

Though extracurricular activities we've met other families with the same arrangements in Chevy Chase, Bethesda, and upper NW DC. This is, in fact, pretty widespread.

So, if you're slogging away saving for that down payment, paying for child care and wondering "how do all these people do it????"....just know that this is one of the ways you're getting shut out. I'm honestly surprised at how widespread this is happening.

Yep, my friend moved into her DH's childhood home. The parents helped their son out and provide her/DH free babysitting to take trips.
I'm so jealous.
They really have the perfect set up.

With just three simple words, this PP has managed to encapsulate the OP's feelings -- resentment, bitterness and envy.

I'm. So. Jealous.

Envy is such an incredibly unattractive trait, as it conveys to the world that you've chosen to become rooted in bitterness, resentment, inferiority, and insecurity.

This post is predictable.

They always find a way to blame someone else for their own inadequacies & shortcomings, because they've deluded themselves into believing that life isn't fair.
They MUST live their lives as perpetual victims of unfairness & injustice⁸⁰.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't that the goal of this entire post?

It seemed like the OP was positively giddy for her GOTCHA! moment, in trying to expose the so-called "secrets" of legacy real estate in the DMV area (aka; inheretences of the rich & privileged).
However, it seems painfully obvious that OP was probably the only one who didn't know that the DMV has always been ripe with real estate legacies, and the three kind of people who react to them:

1. Those who get labeled entitled for having the benefit of legacy/nepo inheritances.
2. Those who feel bitter & resentful because they'll never receive those same privileges AND
3. Those who are happy for anyone who is fortunate enough to own their home... no matter how they got it.

Stop worrying so much about what other people have and how they got it.
Focus on yourself.

Exactly. It's so transparent. Especially because said legacy/inheriting families will often have other advantages, like a built in-childhood social circle that the OP could never buy their way into. The world is unfair but seething over someone else getting blessings from their parents is truly pathetic

I don’t think OP is seething. It’s like watching a slow motion train wreck. My husband’s family was like this - all ivy educated society Mayflower types then a generation full of spending, alcohol and drugs squandered it all. People without purpose pick up bad habits.

I think they are. Because the harsh reality is, there's nothing trainwreck about a guy with an easy non-profit job and a trust fund living a great life in a nice Chevy Chase or Kalorama with his family. There's nothing trainwreck about belonging to a tony country or university club and socializing (and getting valuable connections) with your boarding school buddies. It can be infuriating and enraging to watch these people get handed all the things so many others have worked so hard for, striven their whole lives for. And these guys just get it handed to them on a silver platter, with a maddening insouciance that makes it even worse.

Ooo yeah, this is me. I’m not a train wreck and I haven’t squandered anything. I’m pretty responsible! Never been fired, arrested, genuinely pretty good at my job, etc etc. I just have like, $5m than I’ve earned and that’s not even counting any of the tuition etc. AND I have dramatically different retirement requirements, which really frees us to take entrepreneurial risks and do things like have a SAHP for a while.

I guess we’ll all get cancer?

Right. Which is probably the much more common story than the boozing drug addict trust fund kid who ruins their life because their parents paid for college. The unfair reality is that some people have a lot more advantages and get a lot of help in life. The emotionally mature response to this is to be happy for them and understand that no ill was done to you just because your parents werent rich and you had to earn every penny yourself. The hate for trust funders and old money types on here is just very predictable and frankly embarrassing. Envy is such a bad look

Factually, most generational wealth is squandered in 3 generations.

The stats are 60% is lost by the 2nd generation and 90% by the 3rd.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our kid (only-child) just finished kindergarten at a school in an upscale DMV neighborhood.

We've met at least a dozen families at our school who are living in a childhood home or a living in a house own by an elderly parent/relative and "paying rent" (whatever that means)

Though extracurricular activities we've met other families with the same arrangements in Chevy Chase, Bethesda, and upper NW DC. This is, in fact, pretty widespread.

So, if you're slogging away saving for that down payment, paying for child care and wondering "how do all these people do it????"....just know that this is one of the ways you're getting shut out. I'm honestly surprised at how widespread this is happening.

Yep, my friend moved into her DH's childhood home. The parents helped their son out and provide her/DH free babysitting to take trips.
I'm so jealous.
They really have the perfect set up.

With just three simple words, this PP has managed to encapsulate the OP's feelings -- resentment, bitterness and envy.

I'm. So. Jealous.

Envy is such an incredibly unattractive trait, as it conveys to the world that you've chosen to become rooted in bitterness, resentment, inferiority, and insecurity.

This post is predictable.

They always find a way to blame someone else for their own inadequacies & shortcomings, because they've deluded themselves into believing that life isn't fair.
They MUST live their lives as perpetual victims of unfairness & injustice⁸⁰.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't that the goal of this entire post?

It seemed like the OP was positively giddy for her GOTCHA! moment, in trying to expose the so-called "secrets" of legacy real estate in the DMV area (aka; inheretences of the rich & privileged).
However, it seems painfully obvious that OP was probably the only one who didn't know that the DMV has always been ripe with real estate legacies, and the three kind of people who react to them:

1. Those who get labeled entitled for having the benefit of legacy/nepo inheritances.
2. Those who feel bitter & resentful because they'll never receive those same privileges AND
3. Those who are happy for anyone who is fortunate enough to own their home... no matter how they got it.

Stop worrying so much about what other people have and how they got it.
Focus on yourself.

Exactly. It's so transparent. Especially because said legacy/inheriting families will often have other advantages, like a built in-childhood social circle that the OP could never buy their way into. The world is unfair but seething over someone else getting blessings from their parents is truly pathetic

I don’t think OP is seething. It’s like watching a slow motion train wreck. My husband’s family was like this - all ivy educated society Mayflower types then a generation full of spending, alcohol and drugs squandered it all. People without purpose pick up bad habits.

I think they are. Because the harsh reality is, there's nothing trainwreck about a guy with an easy non-profit job and a trust fund living a great life in a nice Chevy Chase or Kalorama with his family. There's nothing trainwreck about belonging to a tony country or university club and socializing (and getting valuable connections) with your boarding school buddies. It can be infuriating and enraging to watch these people get handed all the things so many others have worked so hard for, striven their whole lives for. And these guys just get it handed to them on a silver platter, with a maddening insouciance that makes it even worse.

Ooo yeah, this is me. I’m not a train wreck and I haven’t squandered anything. I’m pretty responsible! Never been fired, arrested, genuinely pretty good at my job, etc etc. I just have like, $5m than I’ve earned and that’s not even counting any of the tuition etc. AND I have dramatically different retirement requirements, which really frees us to take entrepreneurial risks and do things like have a SAHP for a while.

I guess we’ll all get cancer?

Right. Which is probably the much more common story than the boozing drug addict trust fund kid who ruins their life because their parents paid for college. The unfair reality is that some people have a lot more advantages and get a lot of help in life. The emotionally mature response to this is to be happy for them and understand that no ill was done to you just because your parents werent rich and you had to earn every penny yourself. The hate for trust funders and old money types on here is just very predictable and frankly embarrassing. Envy is such a bad look

Factually, most generational wealth is squandered in 3 generations.

The stats are 60% is lost by the 2nd generation and 90% by the 3rd.

Yep, third generation curse. This is probably why people like Warren Buffet are giving most of their wealth to charity.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our kid (only-child) just finished kindergarten at a school in an upscale DMV neighborhood.

We've met at least a dozen families at our school who are living in a childhood home or a living in a house own by an elderly parent/relative and "paying rent" (whatever that means)

Though extracurricular activities we've met other families with the same arrangements in Chevy Chase, Bethesda, and upper NW DC. This is, in fact, pretty widespread.

So, if you're slogging away saving for that down payment, paying for child care and wondering "how do all these people do it????"....just know that this is one of the ways you're getting shut out. I'm honestly surprised at how widespread this is happening.

Yep, my friend moved into her DH's childhood home. The parents helped their son out and provide her/DH free babysitting to take trips.
I'm so jealous.
They really have the perfect set up.

With just three simple words, this PP has managed to encapsulate the OP's feelings -- resentment, bitterness and envy.

I'm. So. Jealous.

Envy is such an incredibly unattractive trait, as it conveys to the world that you've chosen to become rooted in bitterness, resentment, inferiority, and insecurity.

This post is predictable.

They always find a way to blame someone else for their own inadequacies & shortcomings, because they've deluded themselves into believing that life isn't fair.
They MUST live their lives as perpetual victims of unfairness & injustice⁸⁰.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't that the goal of this entire post?

It seemed like the OP was positively giddy for her GOTCHA! moment, in trying to expose the so-called "secrets" of legacy real estate in the DMV area (aka; inheretences of the rich & privileged).
However, it seems painfully obvious that OP was probably the only one who didn't know that the DMV has always been ripe with real estate legacies, and the three kind of people who react to them:

1. Those who get labeled entitled for having the benefit of legacy/nepo inheritances.
2. Those who feel bitter & resentful because they'll never receive those same privileges AND
3. Those who are happy for anyone who is fortunate enough to own their home... no matter how they got it.

Stop worrying so much about what other people have and how they got it.
Focus on yourself.

Exactly. It's so transparent. Especially because said legacy/inheriting families will often have other advantages, like a built in-childhood social circle that the OP could never buy their way into. The world is unfair but seething over someone else getting blessings from their parents is truly pathetic

I don’t think OP is seething. It’s like watching a slow motion train wreck. My husband’s family was like this - all ivy educated society Mayflower types then a generation full of spending, alcohol and drugs squandered it all. People without purpose pick up bad habits.

I think they are. Because the harsh reality is, there's nothing trainwreck about a guy with an easy non-profit job and a trust fund living a great life in a nice Chevy Chase or Kalorama with his family. There's nothing trainwreck about belonging to a tony country or university club and socializing (and getting valuable connections) with your boarding school buddies. It can be infuriating and enraging to watch these people get handed all the things so many others have worked so hard for, striven their whole lives for. And these guys just get it handed to them on a silver platter, with a maddening insouciance that makes it even worse.

Ooo yeah, this is me. I’m not a train wreck and I haven’t squandered anything. I’m pretty responsible! Never been fired, arrested, genuinely pretty good at my job, etc etc. I just have like, $5m than I’ve earned and that’s not even counting any of the tuition etc. AND I have dramatically different retirement requirements, which really frees us to take entrepreneurial risks and do things like have a SAHP for a while.

I guess we’ll all get cancer?

Right. Which is probably the much more common story than the boozing drug addict trust fund kid who ruins their life because their parents paid for college. The unfair reality is that some people have a lot more advantages and get a lot of help in life. The emotionally mature response to this is to be happy for them and understand that no ill was done to you just because your parents werent rich and you had to earn every penny yourself. The hate for trust funders and old money types on here is just very predictable and frankly embarrassing. Envy is such a bad look

Factually, most generational wealth is squandered in 3 generations.

The stats are 60% is lost by the 2nd generation and 90% by the 3rd.

Who cares? Some will keep it, some won't. Some of these old money families are several generations deep, and have a wealth of social connections worth their weight in gold. It will be up to their descendants to maintain things, same for the new rich couples, which probably have a much higher likelihood of raising drug addict silly wastrels considering they dont have many generations used to having money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our kid (only-child) just finished kindergarten at a school in an upscale DMV neighborhood.

We've met at least a dozen families at our school who are living in a childhood home or a living in a house own by an elderly parent/relative and "paying rent" (whatever that means)

Though extracurricular activities we've met other families with the same arrangements in Chevy Chase, Bethesda, and upper NW DC. This is, in fact, pretty widespread.

So, if you're slogging away saving for that down payment, paying for child care and wondering "how do all these people do it????"....just know that this is one of the ways you're getting shut out. I'm honestly surprised at how widespread this is happening.

Yep, my friend moved into her DH's childhood home. The parents helped their son out and provide her/DH free babysitting to take trips.
I'm so jealous.
They really have the perfect set up.

With just three simple words, this PP has managed to encapsulate the OP's feelings -- resentment, bitterness and envy.

I'm. So. Jealous.

Envy is such an incredibly unattractive trait, as it conveys to the world that you've chosen to become rooted in bitterness, resentment, inferiority, and insecurity.

This post is predictable.

They always find a way to blame someone else for their own inadequacies & shortcomings, because they've deluded themselves into believing that life isn't fair.
They MUST live their lives as perpetual victims of unfairness & injustice⁸⁰.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't that the goal of this entire post?

It seemed like the OP was positively giddy for her GOTCHA! moment, in trying to expose the so-called "secrets" of legacy real estate in the DMV area (aka; inheretences of the rich & privileged).
However, it seems painfully obvious that OP was probably the only one who didn't know that the DMV has always been ripe with real estate legacies, and the three kind of people who react to them:

1. Those who get labeled entitled for having the benefit of legacy/nepo inheritances.
2. Those who feel bitter & resentful because they'll never receive those same privileges AND
3. Those who are happy for anyone who is fortunate enough to own their home... no matter how they got it.

Stop worrying so much about what other people have and how they got it.
Focus on yourself.

Exactly. It's so transparent. Especially because said legacy/inheriting families will often have other advantages, like a built in-childhood social circle that the OP could never buy their way into. The world is unfair but seething over someone else getting blessings from their parents is truly pathetic

I don’t think OP is seething. It’s like watching a slow motion train wreck. My husband’s family was like this - all ivy educated society Mayflower types then a generation full of spending, alcohol and drugs squandered it all. People without purpose pick up bad habits.

I think they are. Because the harsh reality is, there's nothing trainwreck about a guy with an easy non-profit job and a trust fund living a great life in a nice Chevy Chase or Kalorama with his family. There's nothing trainwreck about belonging to a tony country or university club and socializing (and getting valuable connections) with your boarding school buddies. It can be infuriating and enraging to watch these people get handed all the things so many others have worked so hard for, striven their whole lives for. And these guys just get it handed to them on a silver platter, with a maddening insouciance that makes it even worse.

Ooo yeah, this is me. I’m not a train wreck and I haven’t squandered anything. I’m pretty responsible! Never been fired, arrested, genuinely pretty good at my job, etc etc. I just have like, $5m than I’ve earned and that’s not even counting any of the tuition etc. AND I have dramatically different retirement requirements, which really frees us to take entrepreneurial risks and do things like have a SAHP for a while.

I guess we’ll all get cancer?

Right. Which is probably the much more common story than the boozing drug addict trust fund kid who ruins their life because their parents paid for college. The unfair reality is that some people have a lot more advantages and get a lot of help in life. The emotionally mature response to this is to be happy for them and understand that no ill was done to you just because your parents werent rich and you had to earn every penny yourself. The hate for trust funders and old money types on here is just very predictable and frankly embarrassing. Envy is such a bad look

Factually, most generational wealth is squandered in 3 generations.

The stats are 60% is lost by the 2nd generation and 90% by the 3rd.

Who cares? Some will keep it, some won't. Some of these old money families are several generations deep, and have a wealth of social connections worth their weight in gold. It will be up to their descendants to maintain things, same for the new rich couples, which probably have a much higher likelihood of raising drug addict silly wastrels considering they dont have many generations used to having money.

Not quite what the stats show. Time and time again the first generation works hard and is highly successful. Second generation watched them work hard so has a sense of money and manages things ok. Third generation is spoiled and entitled and that is the end of the wealth in 90% of situations.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will never sell my house in MoCo. When we retire, I will keep the house and have one of my adult children live in it. Financially it doesn't make sense to sell.

THIS. I am planning to move out of the area but has decided not to sell my house in Bethesda. Keeping it for the children.

Except most kids don’t want their parents’ house. All the old people around me in CC MD are amazed their kids don’t want their house, mainly because it was last updated 30’years ago and lots of deferred maintenance and the kids created lives elsewhere.

Talk to the kids and they wish the parents would just sell it and save them the hassle of cleaning out the house and selling it.

All the adult children on our block of CCMD are licking their chops to get back into their childhood homes. Proximity to great privates and great publics, easy commute to work, big yards and parks for their kids to play, what's there not to like?

We know of a couple of families who are within a few houses from their childhood homes. And one who actually had to buy their childhood home from a third party because their parents sold it and they're always complaining/ laughing about it

In theory they live elsewhere, no? Just curious how they think parents will give them a house but what will the siblings get? If parents have tons of $$$s so that they just give the kid that gets the house less cash, well then these adult children are wealthy and can buy their childhood home equivalent outright, no?

Yeah, I'm a trust fund kid and I would never want to live in my parents' house. For one thing, they live there! I'm grown and living my life, and by the time they pass away or move to assisted living, god willing, I will be well past middle aged. For another it's my parents' house! Wouldn't that be weird? I could see moving to a house near theirs, but moving into their actual house would weird me out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our kid (only-child) just finished kindergarten at a school in an upscale DMV neighborhood.

We've met at least a dozen families at our school who are living in a childhood home or a living in a house own by an elderly parent/relative and "paying rent" (whatever that means)

Though extracurricular activities we've met other families with the same arrangements in Chevy Chase, Bethesda, and upper NW DC. This is, in fact, pretty widespread.

So, if you're slogging away saving for that down payment, paying for child care and wondering "how do all these people do it????"....just know that this is one of the ways you're getting shut out. I'm honestly surprised at how widespread this is happening.

Yep, my friend moved into her DH's childhood home. The parents helped their son out and provide her/DH free babysitting to take trips.
I'm so jealous.
They really have the perfect set up.

With just three simple words, this PP has managed to encapsulate the OP's feelings -- resentment, bitterness and envy.

I'm. So. Jealous.

Envy is such an incredibly unattractive trait, as it conveys to the world that you've chosen to become rooted in bitterness, resentment, inferiority, and insecurity.

This post is predictable.

They always find a way to blame someone else for their own inadequacies & shortcomings, because they've deluded themselves into believing that life isn't fair.
They MUST live their lives as perpetual victims of unfairness & injustice⁸⁰.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't that the goal of this entire post?

It seemed like the OP was positively giddy for her GOTCHA! moment, in trying to expose the so-called "secrets" of legacy real estate in the DMV area (aka; inheretences of the rich & privileged).
However, it seems painfully obvious that OP was probably the only one who didn't know that the DMV has always been ripe with real estate legacies, and the three kind of people who react to them:

1. Those who get labeled entitled for having the benefit of legacy/nepo inheritances.
2. Those who feel bitter & resentful because they'll never receive those same privileges AND
3. Those who are happy for anyone who is fortunate enough to own their home... no matter how they got it.

Stop worrying so much about what other people have and how they got it.
Focus on yourself.

Exactly. It's so transparent. Especially because said legacy/inheriting families will often have other advantages, like a built in-childhood social circle that the OP could never buy their way into. The world is unfair but seething over someone else getting blessings from their parents is truly pathetic

I don’t think OP is seething. It’s like watching a slow motion train wreck. My husband’s family was like this - all ivy educated society Mayflower types then a generation full of spending, alcohol and drugs squandered it all. People without purpose pick up bad habits.

I think they are. Because the harsh reality is, there's nothing trainwreck about a guy with an easy non-profit job and a trust fund living a great life in a nice Chevy Chase or Kalorama with his family. There's nothing trainwreck about belonging to a tony country or university club and socializing (and getting valuable connections) with your boarding school buddies. It can be infuriating and enraging to watch these people get handed all the things so many others have worked so hard for, striven their whole lives for. And these guys just get it handed to them on a silver platter, with a maddening insouciance that makes it even worse.

Ooo yeah, this is me. I’m not a train wreck and I haven’t squandered anything. I’m pretty responsible! Never been fired, arrested, genuinely pretty good at my job, etc etc. I just have like, $5m than I’ve earned and that’s not even counting any of the tuition etc. AND I have dramatically different retirement requirements, which really frees us to take entrepreneurial risks and do things like have a SAHP for a while.

I guess we’ll all get cancer?

Right. Which is probably the much more common story than the boozing drug addict trust fund kid who ruins their life because their parents paid for college. The unfair reality is that some people have a lot more advantages and get a lot of help in life. The emotionally mature response to this is to be happy for them and understand that no ill was done to you just because your parents werent rich and you had to earn every penny yourself. The hate for trust funders and old money types on here is just very predictable and frankly embarrassing. Envy is such a bad look

Factually, most generational wealth is squandered in 3 generations.

The stats are 60% is lost by the 2nd generation and 90% by the 3rd.

Who cares? Some will keep it, some won't. Some of these old money families are several generations deep, and have a wealth of social connections worth their weight in gold. It will be up to their descendants to maintain things, same for the new rich couples, which probably have a much higher likelihood of raising drug addict silly wastrels considering they dont have many generations used to having money.

Not quite what the stats show. Time and time again the first generation works hard and is highly successful. Second generation watched them work hard so has a sense of money and manages things ok. Third generation is spoiled and entitled and that is the end of the wealth in 90% of situations.

Except by the time youre dealing with true old money families, theyve surpassed that stat and through clever money management, passing down an attitude of frugality and conservatism, and connections, theyve managed to keep the money flowing for generations. Escaping that particular familial curse. The new money families are the ones who should be concerned about it.

And after all, if running out of money is an inevitability, according to your philosophy- time's gonna catch up with the new money strivers as well, so who cares whether it's in two or three generations? After all, it's just a matter of time for both, so why feel smug about a few extra years? How is that a win?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our kid (only-child) just finished kindergarten at a school in an upscale DMV neighborhood.

We've met at least a dozen families at our school who are living in a childhood home or a living in a house own by an elderly parent/relative and "paying rent" (whatever that means)

Though extracurricular activities we've met other families with the same arrangements in Chevy Chase, Bethesda, and upper NW DC. This is, in fact, pretty widespread.

So, if you're slogging away saving for that down payment, paying for child care and wondering "how do all these people do it????"....just know that this is one of the ways you're getting shut out. I'm honestly surprised at how widespread this is happening.

Yep, my friend moved into her DH's childhood home. The parents helped their son out and provide her/DH free babysitting to take trips.
I'm so jealous.
They really have the perfect set up.

With just three simple words, this PP has managed to encapsulate the OP's feelings -- resentment, bitterness and envy.

I'm. So. Jealous.

Envy is such an incredibly unattractive trait, as it conveys to the world that you've chosen to become rooted in bitterness, resentment, inferiority, and insecurity.

This post is predictable.

They always find a way to blame someone else for their own inadequacies & shortcomings, because they've deluded themselves into believing that life isn't fair.
They MUST live their lives as perpetual victims of unfairness & injustice⁸⁰.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't that the goal of this entire post?

It seemed like the OP was positively giddy for her GOTCHA! moment, in trying to expose the so-called "secrets" of legacy real estate in the DMV area (aka; inheretences of the rich & privileged).
However, it seems painfully obvious that OP was probably the only one who didn't know that the DMV has always been ripe with real estate legacies, and the three kind of people who react to them:

1. Those who get labeled entitled for having the benefit of legacy/nepo inheritances.
2. Those who feel bitter & resentful because they'll never receive those same privileges AND
3. Those who are happy for anyone who is fortunate enough to own their home... no matter how they got it.

Stop worrying so much about what other people have and how they got it.
Focus on yourself.

Exactly. It's so transparent. Especially because said legacy/inheriting families will often have other advantages, like a built in-childhood social circle that the OP could never buy their way into. The world is unfair but seething over someone else getting blessings from their parents is truly pathetic

I don’t think OP is seething. It’s like watching a slow motion train wreck. My husband’s family was like this - all ivy educated society Mayflower types then a generation full of spending, alcohol and drugs squandered it all. People without purpose pick up bad habits.

I think they are. Because the harsh reality is, there's nothing trainwreck about a guy with an easy non-profit job and a trust fund living a great life in a nice Chevy Chase or Kalorama with his family. There's nothing trainwreck about belonging to a tony country or university club and socializing (and getting valuable connections) with your boarding school buddies. It can be infuriating and enraging to watch these people get handed all the things so many others have worked so hard for, striven their whole lives for. And these guys just get it handed to them on a silver platter, with a maddening insouciance that makes it even worse.

Ooo yeah, this is me. I’m not a train wreck and I haven’t squandered anything. I’m pretty responsible! Never been fired, arrested, genuinely pretty good at my job, etc etc. I just have like, $5m than I’ve earned and that’s not even counting any of the tuition etc. AND I have dramatically different retirement requirements, which really frees us to take entrepreneurial risks and do things like have a SAHP for a while.

I guess we’ll all get cancer?

Right. Which is probably the much more common story than the boozing drug addict trust fund kid who ruins their life because their parents paid for college. The unfair reality is that some people have a lot more advantages and get a lot of help in life. The emotionally mature response to this is to be happy for them and understand that no ill was done to you just because your parents werent rich and you had to earn every penny yourself. The hate for trust funders and old money types on here is just very predictable and frankly embarrassing. Envy is such a bad look

Factually, most generational wealth is squandered in 3 generations.

The stats are 60% is lost by the 2nd generation and 90% by the 3rd.

Who cares? Some will keep it, some won't. Some of these old money families are several generations deep, and have a wealth of social connections worth their weight in gold. It will be up to their descendants to maintain things, same for the new rich couples, which probably have a much higher likelihood of raising drug addict silly wastrels considering they dont have many generations used to having money.

Nobody cares...but PPs have indicated that wealth just seems to continue for many generations, which is not factually true.

Putting aside anecdotes which are a terrible way to prove any point, the facts are that generations do squander generational wealth. So, It's more accurate that the trust fund kid doesn't end up doing much productive because of the wealth, and then leaves less to their progeny, and by the 3rd generation it is all gone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our kid (only-child) just finished kindergarten at a school in an upscale DMV neighborhood.

We've met at least a dozen families at our school who are living in a childhood home or a living in a house own by an elderly parent/relative and "paying rent" (whatever that means)

Though extracurricular activities we've met other families with the same arrangements in Chevy Chase, Bethesda, and upper NW DC. This is, in fact, pretty widespread.

So, if you're slogging away saving for that down payment, paying for child care and wondering "how do all these people do it????"....just know that this is one of the ways you're getting shut out. I'm honestly surprised at how widespread this is happening.

Yep, my friend moved into her DH's childhood home. The parents helped their son out and provide her/DH free babysitting to take trips.
I'm so jealous.
They really have the perfect set up.

With just three simple words, this PP has managed to encapsulate the OP's feelings -- resentment, bitterness and envy.

I'm. So. Jealous.

Envy is such an incredibly unattractive trait, as it conveys to the world that you've chosen to become rooted in bitterness, resentment, inferiority, and insecurity.

This post is predictable.

They always find a way to blame someone else for their own inadequacies & shortcomings, because they've deluded themselves into believing that life isn't fair.
They MUST live their lives as perpetual victims of unfairness & injustice⁸⁰.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't that the goal of this entire post?

It seemed like the OP was positively giddy for her GOTCHA! moment, in trying to expose the so-called "secrets" of legacy real estate in the DMV area (aka; inheretences of the rich & privileged).
However, it seems painfully obvious that OP was probably the only one who didn't know that the DMV has always been ripe with real estate legacies, and the three kind of people who react to them:

1. Those who get labeled entitled for having the benefit of legacy/nepo inheritances.
2. Those who feel bitter & resentful because they'll never receive those same privileges AND
3. Those who are happy for anyone who is fortunate enough to own their home... no matter how they got it.

Stop worrying so much about what other people have and how they got it.
Focus on yourself.

Exactly. It's so transparent. Especially because said legacy/inheriting families will often have other advantages, like a built in-childhood social circle that the OP could never buy their way into. The world is unfair but seething over someone else getting blessings from their parents is truly pathetic

I don’t think OP is seething. It’s like watching a slow motion train wreck. My husband’s family was like this - all ivy educated society Mayflower types then a generation full of spending, alcohol and drugs squandered it all. People without purpose pick up bad habits.

I think they are. Because the harsh reality is, there's nothing trainwreck about a guy with an easy non-profit job and a trust fund living a great life in a nice Chevy Chase or Kalorama with his family. There's nothing trainwreck about belonging to a tony country or university club and socializing (and getting valuable connections) with your boarding school buddies. It can be infuriating and enraging to watch these people get handed all the things so many others have worked so hard for, striven their whole lives for. And these guys just get it handed to them on a silver platter, with a maddening insouciance that makes it even worse.

Ooo yeah, this is me. I’m not a train wreck and I haven’t squandered anything. I’m pretty responsible! Never been fired, arrested, genuinely pretty good at my job, etc etc. I just have like, $5m than I’ve earned and that’s not even counting any of the tuition etc. AND I have dramatically different retirement requirements, which really frees us to take entrepreneurial risks and do things like have a SAHP for a while.

I guess we’ll all get cancer?

Right. Which is probably the much more common story than the boozing drug addict trust fund kid who ruins their life because their parents paid for college. The unfair reality is that some people have a lot more advantages and get a lot of help in life. The emotionally mature response to this is to be happy for them and understand that no ill was done to you just because your parents werent rich and you had to earn every penny yourself. The hate for trust funders and old money types on here is just very predictable and frankly embarrassing. Envy is such a bad look

Factually, most generational wealth is squandered in 3 generations.

The stats are 60% is lost by the 2nd generation and 90% by the 3rd.

Who cares? Some will keep it, some won't. Some of these old money families are several generations deep, and have a wealth of social connections worth their weight in gold. It will be up to their descendants to maintain things, same for the new rich couples, which probably have a much higher likelihood of raising drug addict silly wastrels considering they dont have many generations used to having money.

Not quite what the stats show. Time and time again the first generation works hard and is highly successful. Second generation watched them work hard so has a sense of money and manages things ok. Third generation is spoiled and entitled and that is the end of the wealth in 90% of situations.

No, the biggest problem with the third generation, and subsequent generations, is that they are big. I'm a 4th gen in a family and my kids will inherit, theoretically, 20x shares in the gen 1 company as the children of one of my 4th gen cousins, and that's just a function of people having more or fewer kids. Nobody "squandered" anything.

I don't think the "social connections" are nearly as big a deal as people think, except for the one that gets you the first job. But those chits are getting harder to cash in as people, quite rightly, tighten their hiring practices.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our kid (only-child) just finished kindergarten at a school in an upscale DMV neighborhood.

We've met at least a dozen families at our school who are living in a childhood home or a living in a house own by an elderly parent/relative and "paying rent" (whatever that means)

Though extracurricular activities we've met other families with the same arrangements in Chevy Chase, Bethesda, and upper NW DC. This is, in fact, pretty widespread.

So, if you're slogging away saving for that down payment, paying for child care and wondering "how do all these people do it????"....just know that this is one of the ways you're getting shut out. I'm honestly surprised at how widespread this is happening.

Yep, my friend moved into her DH's childhood home. The parents helped their son out and provide her/DH free babysitting to take trips.
I'm so jealous.
They really have the perfect set up.

With just three simple words, this PP has managed to encapsulate the OP's feelings -- resentment, bitterness and envy.

I'm. So. Jealous.

Envy is such an incredibly unattractive trait, as it conveys to the world that you've chosen to become rooted in bitterness, resentment, inferiority, and insecurity.

This post is predictable.

They always find a way to blame someone else for their own inadequacies & shortcomings, because they've deluded themselves into believing that life isn't fair.
They MUST live their lives as perpetual victims of unfairness & injustice⁸⁰.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't that the goal of this entire post?

It seemed like the OP was positively giddy for her GOTCHA! moment, in trying to expose the so-called "secrets" of legacy real estate in the DMV area (aka; inheretences of the rich & privileged).
However, it seems painfully obvious that OP was probably the only one who didn't know that the DMV has always been ripe with real estate legacies, and the three kind of people who react to them:

1. Those who get labeled entitled for having the benefit of legacy/nepo inheritances.
2. Those who feel bitter & resentful because they'll never receive those same privileges AND
3. Those who are happy for anyone who is fortunate enough to own their home... no matter how they got it.

Stop worrying so much about what other people have and how they got it.
Focus on yourself.

Exactly. It's so transparent. Especially because said legacy/inheriting families will often have other advantages, like a built in-childhood social circle that the OP could never buy their way into. The world is unfair but seething over someone else getting blessings from their parents is truly pathetic

I don’t think OP is seething. It’s like watching a slow motion train wreck. My husband’s family was like this - all ivy educated society Mayflower types then a generation full of spending, alcohol and drugs squandered it all. People without purpose pick up bad habits.

I think they are. Because the harsh reality is, there's nothing trainwreck about a guy with an easy non-profit job and a trust fund living a great life in a nice Chevy Chase or Kalorama with his family. There's nothing trainwreck about belonging to a tony country or university club and socializing (and getting valuable connections) with your boarding school buddies. It can be infuriating and enraging to watch these people get handed all the things so many others have worked so hard for, striven their whole lives for. And these guys just get it handed to them on a silver platter, with a maddening insouciance that makes it even worse.

Ooo yeah, this is me. I’m not a train wreck and I haven’t squandered anything. I’m pretty responsible! Never been fired, arrested, genuinely pretty good at my job, etc etc. I just have like, $5m than I’ve earned and that’s not even counting any of the tuition etc. AND I have dramatically different retirement requirements, which really frees us to take entrepreneurial risks and do things like have a SAHP for a while.

I guess we’ll all get cancer?

Right. Which is probably the much more common story than the boozing drug addict trust fund kid who ruins their life because their parents paid for college. The unfair reality is that some people have a lot more advantages and get a lot of help in life. The emotionally mature response to this is to be happy for them and understand that no ill was done to you just because your parents werent rich and you had to earn every penny yourself. The hate for trust funders and old money types on here is just very predictable and frankly embarrassing. Envy is such a bad look

Factually, most generational wealth is squandered in 3 generations.

The stats are 60% is lost by the 2nd generation and 90% by the 3rd.

Who cares? Some will keep it, some won't. Some of these old money families are several generations deep, and have a wealth of social connections worth their weight in gold. It will be up to their descendants to maintain things, same for the new rich couples, which probably have a much higher likelihood of raising drug addict silly wastrels considering they dont have many generations used to having money.

Nobody cares...but PPs have indicated that wealth just seems to continue for many generations, which is not factually true.

Putting aside anecdotes which are a terrible way to prove any point, the facts are that generations do squander generational wealth. So, It's more accurate that the trust fund kid doesn't end up doing much productive because of the wealth, and then leaves less to their progeny, and by the 3rd generation it is all gone.

It often does continue for generations, as old money families prove. The ones that last for centuries often have frugal tricks up their sleeve (such as giving their house to offspring, learning to live frugally even though you have the trust) that new money people could never understand. Most of those stats are for people who suddenly get rich- aka the nouveau riche strivers that love to brag about the big house they bought. Ironic, isn't it?