I just found out my boyfriend is super wealthy, and I don't know how to handle it

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You didn't google him?

This?

and check him out on LinkedIn?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was introduced to a man through mutual friends - 35/divorced/lives in Florida. (I'm 32/never married.) We hit it off and started dating, and since he travels a lot for work, he's come up to DC a few times, and we've gone to NYC together once. Things are going really well - he's smart and kind and I honestly didn't think guys like him existed. Okay. Enough being sappy.

I always figured he was financially comfortable because of how he dressed and his job and the hotel he picked in NYC, but I sort of assumed we were on the same level. (I'm in consulting and make very low six-figures - I'm comfortable but nothing obscene for this area.)

But this weekend, we had the big "define the relationship" talk about where our future could go (since we are meeting families this holiday season), and he was honest about his financial situation. He's more than financially comfortable - he has a vacation home in Palm Beach and an apartment in West Village and owns the southern equivalent of INOVA. He apologized for not being up front about everything, but I guess women in the past had been more into the money than him. He said he hopes I'll end up moving to Florida and in the next few years once he finds people to run his businesses for him, we can travel full-time.

I just...I feel like this is a dream come true situation since I love him... but part of me now feels suspicious of dating a really rich guy. I'm a pretty girl, but I am not the kind of pretty girl that dates millionaires. I almost wish I never knew about the money because then I wouldn't be stressing that I now need to lose 15 lbs and be tanner and more...trophy-like. I also have no idea what to buy him for Christmas because what do you buy the person who is literally buying themselves a new Tesla for Christmas - "Oh here babe I got you a nice steering wheel cover to keep your hands warm in your gajillion dollar car"

Also he asked me what I wanted for Christmas, and how do I even answer that?! I'd been saving for a Cartier watch, but I now I feel like it'd be gold-diggery of me to mention I'd been saving up for one.... but if I didn't know he had all that money, I would have had no problem joking that he should buy me the watch (and assume that I wouldn't get it)

I just feel like I need someone to talk to about all this, but I don't trust my friends since they'll all gossip about it lol

This sounds like a scam. Proceed with caution, especially because he lives in a different city.

[Anonymous]

I am not the kind of person who would care about how wealthy a person is, as that is not how I evaluate people.

However, if with this wealth comes an expectation that your normal life, career, relationships will get disrupted significantly then I would really ponder and ask where this relationship is going and if that this relationship is worth it for you to forgo or delay normal life goals like career, kids ...etc.
If this does not work out the way you want then do you really have the time to waste in this relationship?

[Anonymous]

I would proceed with caution. My friend got spun a similar tale about how wealthy her guy was, turned out he was an utter fraud that ghosted her, not before her persuaded to make some “investments” of her own.

[Anonymous]

Troll post but if it's real, you are probably one of many.

And if he is real, and an honest real life charming, handsome multi-millionaire who just happens to be single and happens to have fallen for a 32 year old, then I have met two DCUM unicorns today: him and the new mom who has adventurous sex almost every day and wonders if its enough.

Both posts are probably the same person

[Anonymous]

I’d be cautious about any 35 year old divorced guy living in Palm Beach. You need to do some due diligence on him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why do I feel like I’m reading a script for a Hallmark movie.

This was my same thought.

Don't quit your job OP.

[Anonymous]

I agree. Ask your mutual friends that set you up if this is real or not. Also agree "why stay at a hotel in NYC if he owns there?" Sounds married to me.

[Anonymous]

OP, come back!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You didn't google him?

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’d be cautious about any 35 year old divorced guy living in Palm Beach. You need to do some due diligence on him.

Unless his mom lives there? Why would you live there otherwise as a young man?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was introduced to a man through mutual friends - 35/divorced/lives in Florida....

owns the southern equivalent of INOVA. He apologized for not being up front about everything, but I guess women in the past had been more into the money than him. He said he hopes I'll end up moving to Florida and in the next few years once he finds people to run his businesses for him, we can travel full-time.



I just feel like I need someone to talk to about all this, but I don't trust my friends since they'll all gossip about it lol

Did he give you the name of the hospital system? Did it check out with his name and ownership?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you went to NYC and stayed in a hotel even though he has a place in West Village he is still married.

Absolutely.

Step 1: Google him.

Step 2: google his ex wife.


Dude is married, for sure.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was introduced to a man through mutual friends - 35/divorced/lives in Florida. (I'm 32/never married.) We hit it off and started dating, and since he travels a lot for work, he's come up to DC a few times, and we've gone to NYC together once. Things are going really well - he's smart and kind and I honestly didn't think guys like him existed. Okay. Enough being sappy.

I always figured he was financially comfortable because of how he dressed and his job and the hotel he picked in NYC, but I sort of assumed we were on the same level. (I'm in consulting and make very low six-figures - I'm comfortable but nothing obscene for this area.)

But this weekend, we had the big "define the relationship" talk about where our future could go (since we are meeting families this holiday season), and he was honest about his financial situation. He's more than financially comfortable - he has a vacation home in Palm Beach and an apartment in West Village and owns the southern equivalent of INOVA. He apologized for not being up front about everything, but I guess women in the past had been more into the money than him. He said he hopes I'll end up moving to Florida and in the next few years once he finds people to run his businesses for him, we can travel full-time.

I just...I feel like this is a dream come true situation since I love him... but part of me now feels suspicious of dating a really rich guy. I'm a pretty girl, but I am not the kind of pretty girl that dates millionaires. I almost wish I never knew about the money because then I wouldn't be stressing that I now need to lose 15 lbs and be tanner and more...trophy-like. I also have no idea what to buy him for Christmas because what do you buy the person who is literally buying themselves a new Tesla for Christmas - "Oh here babe I got you a nice steering wheel cover to keep your hands warm in your gajillion dollar car"

Also he asked me what I wanted for Christmas, and how do I even answer that?! I'd been saving for a Cartier watch, but I now I feel like it'd be gold-diggery of me to mention I'd been saving up for one.... but if I didn't know he had all that money, I would have had no problem joking that he should buy me the watch (and assume that I wouldn't get it)

I just feel like I need someone to talk to about all this, but I don't trust my friends since they'll all gossip about it lol

Oof. Red flags all over the place. Proceed with caution and I would not believe anything he says at this stage. That sentence bolded above would make me RUN. Have you heard of "love bombing"? Look it up. If you were my friend, I would tell you to be *very* careful. Something is fishy. Sorry, this sets off my narcissist radar.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do I feel like I’m reading a script for a Hallmark movie.

Plot twist: the boyfriend is really a set of twins

and one of them is really a medieval knight - but they both love christmas

But their flight gets rerouted on their way to NYC due to bad weather and they end up in a small town where they learn the true meaning of Christmas.