I just found out my boyfriend is super wealthy, and I don't know how to handle it

[Anonymous]

It seems like a quick Google search early on would have given you a hint. Didn't you check him at all?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You didn't google him?

This?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So he's divorced, lives in Florida and you live in the DC area? Okey dokey...That should work out well. Hint: Don't quit your job.

Are you sure he's divorced? Did you google him? Have you met his kids and ex-wife? Agree don't quit your job. Sounds a bit shady.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was introduced to a man through mutual friends - 35/divorced/lives in Florida. (I'm 32/never married.) We hit it off and started dating, and since he travels a lot for work, he's come up to DC a few times, and we've gone to NYC together once. Things are going really well - he's smart and kind and I honestly didn't think guys like him existed. Okay. Enough being sappy.

I always figured he was financially comfortable because of how he dressed and his job and the hotel he picked in NYC, but I sort of assumed we were on the same level. (I'm in consulting and make very low six-figures - I'm comfortable but nothing obscene for this area.)

But this weekend, we had the big "define the relationship" talk about where our future could go (since we are meeting families this holiday season), and he was honest about his financial situation. He's more than financially comfortable - he has a vacation home in Palm Beach and an apartment in West Village and owns the southern equivalent of INOVA. He apologized for not being up front about everything, but I guess women in the past had been more into the money than him. He said he hopes I'll end up moving to Florida and in the next few years once he finds people to run his businesses for him, we can travel full-time.

I just...I feel like this is a dream come true situation since I love him... but part of me now feels suspicious of dating a really rich guy. I'm a pretty girl, but I am not the kind of pretty girl that dates millionaires. I almost wish I never knew about the money because then I wouldn't be stressing that I now need to lose 15 lbs and be tanner and more...trophy-like. I also have no idea what to buy him for Christmas because what do you buy the person who is literally buying themselves a new Tesla for Christmas - "Oh here babe I got you a nice steering wheel cover to keep your hands warm in your gajillion dollar car"

Also he asked me what I wanted for Christmas, and how do I even answer that?! I'd been saving for a Cartier watch, but I now I feel like it'd be gold-diggery of me to mention I'd been saving up for one.... but if I didn't know he had all that money, I would have had no problem joking that he should buy me the watch (and assume that I wouldn't get it)

I just feel like I need someone to talk to about all this, but I don't trust my friends since they'll all gossip about it lol

You went out with this guy to the point where you meet the parents but you have yet to do a simple Google/linkedin/social media presence search on him to find out this fact? hmmm.....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do I feel like I’m reading a script for a Hallmark movie.

Plot twist: the boyfriend is really a set of twins

and one of them is really a medieval knight - but they both love christmas

[Anonymous]

Pro-tip: Ask for two Cartier watches. Then it seems less like gold digging when you settle for one.

[Anonymous]

I don’t understand why anything has to change just because you found out that he is “rich.” This should not even matter. Buy him what you would have had you not know about his finances. Do not tell him you want a Cartier watch!!!! Ask for what you would have asked him for before you knew about his finances. Act as if his money is not yours. Because it isn’t yours.

[Anonymous]

I agree this whole story is suspect. What 32 year old doesn't do a basic internet search on the man she's dating? Also, a 35 year who owns and personally operates a large hospital conglomerate? Right...

[Anonymous]

The monocle and top hat didn't tip you off to his wealth? Suspect.

[Anonymous]

Not suspect to me. We live in one of the wealthiest parts of the entire world. You never know who you’re sitting next to on the metro. It’s Washington, D.C. you’re talking about. And more wealth is coming with the tech bros from CA.

[Anonymous]

You have nothing to worry about until he proposes. Do not move anywhere until you are married. Don't do something stupid like quit. You are dating him, you are not married.

[Anonymous]

Are the mutual friends close enough that you can get a handle on how well they know him and for how long to be sure there is no scam involved? Did they already know he "super wealthy"? How did they get to know him? I feel like being introduced by friends who think you two make a good match is a positive sign, assuming they know you and him well enough. How much does he socialize with people who expect a trophy wife kind of person? Would you be happy/satisfied with a lifetime of just travelling and not working? (Actually, that to me would be a warning sign.)

[Anonymous]

How are you dating if he’s only been to DC a few times and NY once?

[Anonymous]

If you went to NYC and stayed in a hotel even though he has a place in West Village he is still married.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you went to NYC and stayed in a hotel even though he has a place in West Village he is still married.

heehee...