Stop complaining about the way patents are raising kids today versus twenty years ago

[Anonymous]

OP -- I don't like generational stereotypes. I'm a baby boomer and I'm just relieved not to be raising a kid today. You do you!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, OP. Just no.

We will complain about you and your parenting style compared the past. Deal with it (whithout running off to your "safe space").

You millenials are the most self-absorbed, narcissistic, infantile generation ever. Your so immature, they now have offer remedial classes to adult millenials just to learn how to "adult!"

https://www.kxnet.com/news/bismarck-news/-adulting-classes-teach-millennials-basic-adult-life-skills/1663377272

Pathetic. I can only imagine what confused little brats you must be raising.

Preach! My oldest is 29. Youngest is 16. I have a foot in both worlds. The difference is truly astounding.

Huh? So you’re saying you did a crap job of raising your first kid but got your act together for your second?

Not at all. I have four successful adult children. All college grads. All with zero student loan debt and great jobs. I have every reason to believe my 16 year old will do just as well. But I’ve watched the differences in parenting over the last 30 years. It truly is astounding. When my oldest was younger, parents trusted and respected teachers. We didn’t contact them daily with a constant list of “concerns”. We didn’t enroll our kids in 10 different “enrichment” activities. We didn’t pour over college applications, help with essays, or prep our kids like crazy for tests. We dropped our kids off at birthday parties and didn’t hover over them at the playground. The idea of calling a college professor over a grade would have seemed absolutely inplausible. And it never occurred to us that our adult kids would move home after college.

So yes. Things have drastically changed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, OP. Just no.

We will complain about you and your parenting style compared the past. Deal with it (whithout running off to your "safe space").

You millenials are the most self-absorbed, narcissistic, infantile generation ever. Your so immature, they now have offer remedial classes to adult millenials just to learn how to "adult!"

https://www.kxnet.com/news/bismarck-news/-adulting-classes-teach-millennials-basic-adult-life-skills/1663377272

Pathetic. I can only imagine what confused little brats you must be raising.

Preach! My oldest is 29. Youngest is 16. I have a foot in both worlds. The difference is truly astounding.

Huh? So you’re saying you did a crap job of raising your first kid but got your act together for your second?

Not at all. I have four successful adult children. All college grads. All with zero student loan debt and great jobs. I have every reason to believe my 16 year old will do just as well. But I’ve watched the differences in parenting over the last 30 years. It truly is astounding. When my oldest was younger, parents trusted and respected teachers. We didn’t contact them daily with a constant list of “concerns”. We didn’t enroll our kids in 10 different “enrichment” activities. We didn’t pour over college applications, help with essays, or prep our kids like crazy for tests. We dropped our kids off at birthday parties and didn’t hover over them at the playground. The idea of calling a college professor over a grade would have seemed absolutely inplausible. And it never occurred to us that our adult kids would move home after college.

So yes. Things have drastically changed.

No, it hasn't drastically changed between your kids. It's just that with your youngest, you actually had time to notice your kid, try to take the time to know that kid and his or her world, and and try to see what was going on with and around him or her. You didn't pay close attention to your oldest kids, in contrast, so didn't notice these things. The difference is you, not the world.

Signed,
Oldest of Five

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, OP. Just no.

We will complain about you and your parenting style compared the past. Deal with it (whithout running off to your "safe space").

You millenials are the most self-absorbed, narcissistic, infantile generation ever. Your so immature, they now have offer remedial classes to adult millenials just to learn how to "adult!"

https://www.kxnet.com/news/bismarck-news/-adulting-classes-teach-millennials-basic-adult-life-skills/1663377272

Pathetic. I can only imagine what confused little brats you must be raising.

Preach! My oldest is 29. Youngest is 16. I have a foot in both worlds. The difference is truly astounding.

Huh? So you’re saying you did a crap job of raising your first kid but got your act together for your second?

Not at all. I have four successful adult children. All college grads. All with zero student loan debt and great jobs. I have every reason to believe my 16 year old will do just as well. But I’ve watched the differences in parenting over the last 30 years. It truly is astounding. When my oldest was younger, parents trusted and respected teachers. We didn’t contact them daily with a constant list of “concerns”. We didn’t enroll our kids in 10 different “enrichment” activities. We didn’t pour over college applications, help with essays, or prep our kids like crazy for tests. We dropped our kids off at birthday parties and didn’t hover over them at the playground. The idea of calling a college professor over a grade would have seemed absolutely inplausible. And it never occurred to us that our adult kids would move home after college.

So yes. Things have drastically changed.

No, it hasn't drastically changed between your kids. It's just that with your youngest, you actually had time to notice your kid, try to take the time to know that kid and his or her world, and and try to see what was going on with and around him or her. You didn't pay close attention to your oldest kids, in contrast, so didn't notice these things. The difference is you, not the world.

Signed,
Oldest of Five

Also, millennials were born from 1980-2000. Your older kids are millennials, your youngest kid is not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, OP. Just no.

We will complain about you and your parenting style compared the past. Deal with it (whithout running off to your "safe space").

You millenials are the most self-absorbed, narcissistic, infantile generation ever. Your so immature, they now have offer remedial classes to adult millenials just to learn how to "adult!"

https://www.kxnet.com/news/bismarck-news/-adulting-classes-teach-millennials-basic-adult-life-skills/1663377272

Pathetic. I can only imagine what confused little brats you must be raising.

Preach! My oldest is 29. Youngest is 16. I have a foot in both worlds. The difference is truly astounding.

Huh? So you’re saying you did a crap job of raising your first kid but got your act together for your second?

Not at all. I have four successful adult children. All college grads. All with zero student loan debt and great jobs. I have every reason to believe my 16 year old will do just as well. But I’ve watched the differences in parenting over the last 30 years. It truly is astounding. When my oldest was younger, parents trusted and respected teachers. We didn’t contact them daily with a constant list of “concerns”. We didn’t enroll our kids in 10 different “enrichment” activities. We didn’t pour over college applications, help with essays, or prep our kids like crazy for tests. We dropped our kids off at birthday parties and didn’t hover over them at the playground. The idea of calling a college professor over a grade would have seemed absolutely inplausible. And it never occurred to us that our adult kids would move home after college.

So yes. Things have drastically changed.

Agree.

There are even names for the "bad parent behaviors" you describe:

lawnmower parents = parents who REMOVE or mow down any challenges facing their kids & make everything super easy for the kid. This prevents kids developing resilience or "grit" and sets them up for failure.

helicopter parents = those who hover over their kids 24/7 (usually out of irrational fear; fear fueled by the Internet). This bad behavior also leads to unhealthy dependence, lack of independence, and lack of resilience.

Millenials engage in both of these bad behaviors; they can tell you the latest about whats trending on Twitter, but they are too frightened to look at themselves in the proverbial mirror, and ask if they are doing a good job of parenting?

Stop twitting, stop being a twit, and look for what traditionally WORKS for raising successful kids (hint: it isn't coddling them).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, OP. Just no.

We will complain about you and your parenting style compared the past. Deal with it (whithout running off to your "safe space").

You millenials are the most self-absorbed, narcissistic, infantile generation ever. Your so immature, they now have offer remedial classes to adult millenials just to learn how to "adult!"

https://www.kxnet.com/news/bismarck-news/-adulting-classes-teach-millennials-basic-adult-life-skills/1663377272

Pathetic. I can only imagine what confused little brats you must be raising.

Preach! My oldest is 29. Youngest is 16. I have a foot in both worlds. The difference is truly astounding.

Huh? So you’re saying you did a crap job of raising your first kid but got your act together for your second?

Not at all. I have four successful adult children. All college grads. All with zero student loan debt and great jobs. I have every reason to believe my 16 year old will do just as well. But I’ve watched the differences in parenting over the last 30 years. It truly is astounding. When my oldest was younger, parents trusted and respected teachers. We didn’t contact them daily with a constant list of “concerns”. We didn’t enroll our kids in 10 different “enrichment” activities. We didn’t pour over college applications, help with essays, or prep our kids like crazy for tests. We dropped our kids off at birthday parties and didn’t hover over them at the playground. The idea of calling a college professor over a grade would have seemed absolutely inplausible. And it never occurred to us that our adult kids would move home after college.

So yes. Things have drastically changed.

Agree.

There are even names for the "bad parent behaviors" you describe:

lawnmower parents = parents who REMOVE or mow down any challenges facing their kids & make everything super easy for the kid. This prevents kids developing resilience or "grit" and sets them up for failure.

helicopter parents = those who hover over their kids 24/7 (usually out of irrational fear; fear fueled by the Internet). This bad behavior also leads to unhealthy dependence, lack of independence, and lack of resilience.

Millenials engage in both of these bad behaviors; they can tell you the latest about whats trending on Twitter, but they are too frightened to look at themselves in the proverbial mirror, and ask if they are doing a good job of parenting?

Stop twitting, stop being a twit, and look for what traditionally WORKS for raising successful kids (hint: it isn't coddling them).

Honestly--do you know any Millennials and know them well? Or are you recycling stereotypes from memes you see on Facebook? Because this is so weird to me.

I am a Millennial, mother of two, and it is often shocking to me how consciously my peers (and my husband, a Gen Xer, and I) are raising our kids. We read book after book. We think about how to respond instead of yelling or spanking. We discuss discipline, behavior, child sleep patterns, etc. ad nauseum. My in laws -- boomers -- literally laugh at us, saying they never thought about parenting this much, they just winged it. My parents also didn't give a whole lot of thought to parenting.

So, boomers, which is it? Are we too narcissistic, materialistic, and oblivious to be good parents? Do we spoil the kids rotten because we are lazy and weak? Or are we overthinking what could be a mindless exercise of raising kids, because it isn't as hard as we make it out to be? Do we spoil the kids rotten because we are neurotic?

Also, have you looked in the proverbial mirror at all? I'm not sure you should be so comfortable with what your generation has done to the world. Who do you blame for the current state of things?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think this has anything to do with millennials or the economy or anything listed here. Anyone who has taught or worked with children over the past 20-30 years can tell you that parents are massively more anxious and hovering than they used to be, and this is due to one thing: the Internet. Since the late 1990s parents have made the internet into an echo chamber of their anxieties, causing everything from the ridiculous anti-vaccine movement to the epidemic of “have you had your child tested??” diagnoses.

And most of the parents doing all of this have been Gen X, not Millenials.

I guess it's nice to have one's existence acknowledged - a rare occurrence -- even if it's only to be blamed.

-Gen Xer

javascript:void(0);

https://gizmodo.com/5851062/generation-x-is-sick-of-your-bullshit


As a GenX-er, I kinda hate both the Boomers and the Millennials, but will end up siding with the Millennials, because the Boomers have for the most part pulled up the ladder behind them, as a poster above said.

[Anonymous]

and why won't the boomers retire? Get out of that job you're not doing and let someone else have it.

[Anonymous]

As a GenX-er, I kinda hate both the Boomers and the Millennials, but will end up siding with the Millennials, because the Boomers have for the most part pulled up the ladder behind them, as a poster above said.

+1,000,000

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:and why won't the boomers retire? Get out of that job you're not doing and let someone else have it.

They didn't save well for retirement.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think this has anything to do with millennials or the economy or anything listed here. Anyone who has taught or worked with children over the past 20-30 years can tell you that parents are massively more anxious and hovering than they used to be, and this is due to one thing: the Internet. Since the late 1990s parents have made the internet into an echo chamber of their anxieties, causing everything from the ridiculous anti-vaccine movement to the epidemic of “have you had your child tested??” diagnoses.

And most of the parents doing all of this have been Gen X, not Millenials.

I guess it's nice to have one's existence acknowledged - a rare occurrence -- even if it's only to be blamed.

-Gen Xer

Yeah, me too. I was going to say something but then thought I'd just shrug, roll my eyes, and adjust my flannel shirt and ripped jeans instead. We are raising the bleeding edge of iGen, if that name sticks, the first generation who grew up knowing how to swipe an iPhone before they knew how to feed themselves. We'll see how we did. My 12 year old is pretty damn awesome, and I think they are going to be fine. For what it is worth I think Millenials are fine, too - in some respects they are just the mirror of the Boomers who raised them. And if Millenials disrupt the workplace enough that my son comes of age into a world where its expected that we treat staff as people with needs and frailties and not as widgets...well, then, I bless them. And if in the end snowflake Millenials make it so that fewer LGBTQ kids are bullied, and fewer racists can hurt people, I thank them for that, too. Carry on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Baby Boomer here who did not benefit from any of the items you mentioned. I just worked two jobs when I could so that I wouldn't have massive student debt, and if I couldn't afford it I didn't buy it. I kept my cars for ten plus years and keep my smart phone forever, resisting the urge to have the newest and best. That's something your generation has perfected, the need for instant gratification and if you don't get it, you point your little fingers at everybody else, it's always someone else's fault, always. Not buying into your pity part, actually a little sick of your generation. Who are you going to blame when we all die out? No worries, I know you'll find someone or thing to blame other than yourself. Go take your nap.
Oh no, you'e not allowed to complain about having graduated into the worst economy since the Great Depression, or about having massive student debt that Baby Boomers didn't have. That makes you narcissistic.

Are you delusional? I worked three jobs, went to school full time, and still had massive student debt. That is because school just COSTS more now. That $7 minimum wage goes a hell lot less far than it did 30 years ago. FWIW, I paid off that massive debt by working at a job I hated and doing without, just praying I didn’t get sick or injured in a car accident because that could have quite literally destroyed my life. I was well into my 30s before I could buy a house. The Boomer who sold that to me made a tidy 200% profit.

To be honest, I can’t wait until your generation dies off. You climbed up the ladder your parents left for you and pulled it up behind you. You destroyed the social fabric of this country with your conspiracy theories and unending greed. See, e.g., the Great Recession, caused by your lies and your cheap McMansions you just had to fill with the latest in faux Tuscan garbage. You voted for bad policies that benefit corporations at the expense of people. Right when our country is about to break under the weight of your senior entitlements (that’s what they are, even if you paid 1% of the cost for them), you give yourselves a fat tax cut. You start dumb wars to keep the $ flowing and the people scared. My infant son will be paying off your debts for the rest of his life. When you die, we can start to clean up the mess.

It will mean more doing without, but we millennials are pros at that by now.

I just gave this post a standing ovation at my desk. Couldn't have said it any better myself.

[Anonymous]

Gen x-er here-really, the only thing we have 200% in common with millennials is our mutual disgust for baby boomers.

[Anonymous]

Generational warfare is just as bad as class warfare. Just stop.

[Anonymous]

I see the people who want to create divisiveness and hatred have found this page or at least have influenced the posters through other sources. We are not going to find a better way forward if we keep pointing fingers at others and don’t take responsibility for ourselves.