Advice from women - sexual jealousy is good, in doses?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Very immature people on this thread that shouldn't be married. If you resort to games instead of communicating your marriage won't last.

If my husband was flirting with another woman I would only resent him. That's a quick way to break down trust.

Many of you need to grow up, and brush up on your communication skills. How about talking to your spouse?

And if a poor person wants steak, they should just shoot a cow. Easy peasy.

You can't talk your way back into desire. You can communicate your need for more sex and intimacy but it won't rev her engine like a little competition will.

But good for you for having a naturally compatible libido with your spouse. Not all couples have it so easy.

[Anonymous]

I would like to see that another woman finds my partner attractive. Flirting? Harmless. It probably would rev me up for him a bit.

I do find that when my partner talks complementarily about women he's been working with I feel a little jealous ... wondering if he is interested in them. Logically, I know this is ridiculous. But I do get a little twinge and want to f him more.

So, have at it within bounds, gentlemen. At least if you are my partner.

[Anonymous]

DW has a friend that is always flirty with me, I try to avoid her as best as I can, but this situation does seem to lead to sex with DW
On the other hand if some random woman talks to me, DW will say that we were flirting and she gets mad

[Anonymous]

I don't think it's a good idea to allow jealousy into your relationship over the long term. Can't predict what else it might drive your wife to do.

[Anonymous]

Other women flirting with husband - hot. Husband encouraging it - disrespectful/embarrassing. It’s a fine line.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Many of you need to grow up, and brush up on your communication skills. How about talking to your spouse?

You can't talk your way back into desire. You can communicate your need for more sex and intimacy but it won't rev her engine like a little competition will.

+1. Communication sounds good and jealousy sounds bad, but talking about wanting sex is unsexy and makes a woman even less likely to want to have sex with a guy. Meanwhile, seeing that other women wants a husband makes the wife feel more attracted to him. Turns out the world is not nice or fair.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Other women flirting with husband - hot. Husband encouraging it - disrespectful/embarrassing. It’s a fine line.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't think it's a good idea to allow jealousy into your relationship over the long term. Can't predict what else it might drive your wife to do.

She might decide to make you jealous and in the process meet someone she likes better.

[Anonymous]

When I was young and insecure, I dated a male model off and on for about three years. We actually had a child together. I let jealousy of other women cloud how I saw him. When I got over the jealousy, I saw that beyond appearance, he was no catch.

As a newlywed, a coworker of my then-H fell in love with him. It was glaringly obvious to everyone. He was initially uncomfortable with it, but over time it puffed him up in an unattractive way. He said he didn’t reciprocate, but rubbed her adoration and attraction in my face. It really broke my jealousy button, which ended up being a blessing because 1) he had an EA four years later but just wanted him gone, and

2) after my divorce, I remarried a handsome, charismatic man that everyone flirts with. I simply don’t get jealous, so it doesn’t harm our relationship.

[Anonymous]

Wife here. It matters. When I got married women used to be all over my husband - he was so fit and attractive, and I loved how he only had eyes for me. After marriage he quickly decided getting fat was ok, and now he gets no female attention. I used to feel proud and now I feel embarrassed. We still have sex but my genuine desire is way down. Not my fault. Biology.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wife here. It matters. When I got married women used to be all over my husband - he was so fit and attractive, and I loved how he only had eyes for me. After marriage he quickly decided getting fat was ok, and now he gets no female attention. I used to feel proud and now I feel embarrassed. We still have sex but my genuine desire is way down. Not my fault. Biology.

If it makes you feel any better, like most women, you'd still eventually lose interest in him even if he was fit, attractive and great in bed. Also basic biology.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wife here. It matters. When I got married women used to be all over my husband - he was so fit and attractive, and I loved how he only had eyes for me. After marriage he quickly decided getting fat was ok, and now he gets no female attention. I used to feel proud and now I feel embarrassed. We still have sex but my genuine desire is way down. Not my fault. Biology.

If it makes you feel any better, like most women, you'd still eventually lose interest in him even if he was fit, attractive and great in bed. Also basic biology.

I don't know. I feel like I am always reading people on this board saying in the comments how wonderful their husbands are and how attracted they are to them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wife here. It matters. When I got married women used to be all over my husband - he was so fit and attractive, and I loved how he only had eyes for me. After marriage he quickly decided getting fat was ok, and now he gets no female attention. I used to feel proud and now I feel embarrassed. We still have sex but my genuine desire is way down. Not my fault. Biology.

If it makes you feel any better, like most women, you'd still eventually lose interest in him even if he was fit, attractive and great in bed. Also basic biology.

I don't know. I feel like I am always reading people on this board saying in the comments how wonderful their husbands are and how attracted they are to them.

My wife tells everyone how wonderful I am. Still isn't jumping my bones. It's once a week duty sex. Period. End of story.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wife here. It matters. When I got married women used to be all over my husband - he was so fit and attractive, and I loved how he only had eyes for me. After marriage he quickly decided getting fat was ok, and now he gets no female attention. I used to feel proud and now I feel embarrassed. We still have sex but my genuine desire is way down. Not my fault. Biology.

If it makes you feel any better, like most women, you'd still eventually lose interest in him even if he was fit, attractive and great in bed. Also basic biology.

I don't know. I feel like I am always reading people on this board saying in the comments how wonderful their husbands are and how attracted they are to them.

My wife tells everyone how wonderful I am. Still isn't jumping my bones. It's once a week duty sex. Period. End of story.

Well, I'm sorry. Being disappointed in your marriage feels pretty crappy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wife here. It matters. When I got married women used to be all over my husband - he was so fit and attractive, and I loved how he only had eyes for me. After marriage he quickly decided getting fat was ok, and now he gets no female attention. I used to feel proud and now I feel embarrassed. We still have sex but my genuine desire is way down. Not my fault. Biology.

If it makes you feel any better, like most women, you'd still eventually lose interest in him even if he was fit, attractive and great in bed. Also basic biology.

I don't know. I feel like I am always reading people on this board saying in the comments how wonderful their husbands are and how attracted they are to them.

My wife tells everyone how wonderful I am. Still isn't jumping my bones. It's once a week duty sex. Period. End of story.

Well, I'm sorry. Being disappointed in your marriage feels pretty crappy.

I'm actually pretty happy in my marriage, for the most part, but it does wear you down after awhile to know that no matter what you do, that part of it will never change.