Met a guy at a party I like but two guys I DON'T like are texting me

[Anonymous]

Ask your friend. You can certainly hang with the two guys casually (maybe even with your friend and her boyfriend). Just don't do solo dates. Be sweet, hang out with them as friends and be clear that you are not feeling the romantic sparks but you find them wonderful to do fun stuff with. This prevents any ill feelings.

As for the tall guy. Again ask the friend to include him when you hang out with her and her BF. For all you know once u get to know him he will not be that great. Still, for the 2 guys and the tall guy - my answer is the same - meet them in a group. Then decide if you want to get to know them better or not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ask your friend. You can certainly hang with the two guys casually (maybe even with your friend and her boyfriend). Just don't do solo dates. Be sweet, hang out with them as friends and be clear that you are not feeling the romantic sparks but you find them wonderful to do fun stuff with. This prevents any ill feelings.

As for the tall guy. Again ask the friend to include him when you hang out with her and her BF. For all you know once u get to know him he will not be that great. Still, for the 2 guys and the tall guy - my answer is the same - meet them in a group. Then decide if you want to get to know them better or not.

I like this advice. I guess the annoying thing is the guy she is dating is not friends with him- tall guy mentioned that he knew him in HS but they werent really friends, so I'm not sure how he's related to the group or who he was close to- I didnt really know the dynamics, unfortunately, though he seemed well liked.

But I like that idea nonetheless. I'm sure I could throw it out to her and maybe her BF could mention it to him and if he's interested maybe it can happen! Seems easier than tracking him down otherwise

[Anonymous]

So you think these two guys are so delicate that they can't handle rejection from a "pretty attractive" woman and will slander your name so much that you can't hang out with the group anymore, ruining your chances with hot guy? Yea, okay.

Most people are more mature than that, but if you are still worried, pull the ol' "thanks but I'm not dating at the moment so I can focus on myself". Yea, they'll see right through it, but it allows everyone to save some face.

For hot guy- if you wouldn't be embarrassed if he rejected you and word got out, then go ahead and ask a mutual friend for his info. If you would be embarrassed, then just bide your time and wait to run into him again. As for it being creepy, it depends on how hot he thinks you are. Hot= not creepy. Not hot=creepy. But in my experience, guys you have to push like this tend to make very little effort even if they are interested, or are only interested in sex and nothing else.

[Anonymous]

I'm only one page in but methinks the tall guy dodged a bullet

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So you think these two guys are so delicate that they can't handle rejection from a "pretty attractive" woman and will slander your name so much that you can't hang out with the group anymore, ruining your chances with hot guy? Yea, okay.

Most people are more mature than that, but if you are still worried, pull the ol' "thanks but I'm not dating at the moment so I can focus on myself". Yea, they'll see right through it, but it allows everyone to save some face.

For hot guy- if you wouldn't be embarrassed if he rejected you and word got out, then go ahead and ask a mutual friend for his info. If you would be embarrassed, then just bide your time and wait to run into him again. As for it being creepy, it depends on how hot he thinks you are. Hot= not creepy. Not hot=creepy. But in my experience, guys you have to push like this tend to make very little effort even if they are interested, or are only interested in sex and nothing else.

Thanks. I worry that the "not dating at the moment" thing might spread out and make me unable to date anyone else in the group- but I suppose you're right, they'll probably understand what it means and take it in kind. They seem like sweet dudes, so I also want to spare their feelings somewhat.

As for the hot guy, I know he thinks I'm hot, but him being lazy is part of my concern. But I'm not looking for anything super serious soulmatey, so I feel like it's fine if he's lazy. I'm honestly kind of bored since I moved to this city and I want someone to hang out with who I also want to bone. So he kind of fits the bill. Not that I'm looking for an f-buddy either. But I feel like if he's a lazy schmuck it won't annoy me too much (although it did occur to me)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm only one page in but methinks the tall guy dodged a bullet

I think anyone who uses the word "methinks" cant give dating advise.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So you think these two guys are so delicate that they can't handle rejection from a "pretty attractive" woman and will slander your name so much that you can't hang out with the group anymore, ruining your chances with hot guy? Yea, okay.

Most people are more mature than that, but if you are still worried, pull the ol' "thanks but I'm not dating at the moment so I can focus on myself". Yea, they'll see right through it, but it allows everyone to save some face.

For hot guy- if you wouldn't be embarrassed if he rejected you and word got out, then go ahead and ask a mutual friend for his info. If you would be embarrassed, then just bide your time and wait to run into him again. As for it being creepy, it depends on how hot he thinks you are. Hot= not creepy. Not hot=creepy. But in my experience, guys you have to push like this tend to make very little effort even if they are interested, or are only interested in sex and nothing else.

Thanks. I worry that the "not dating at the moment" thing might spread out and make me unable to date anyone else in the group- but I suppose you're right, they'll probably understand what it means and take it in kind. They seem like sweet dudes, so I also want to spare their feelings somewhat.

As for the hot guy, I know he thinks I'm hot, but him being lazy is part of my concern. But I'm not looking for anything super serious soulmatey, so I feel like it's fine if he's lazy. I'm honestly kind of bored since I moved to this city and I want someone to hang out with who I also want to bone. So he kind of fits the bill. Not that I'm looking for an f-buddy either. But I feel like if he's a lazy schmuck it won't annoy me too much (although it did occur to me)

So he’s lazy and you’re easy. You don’t need to date anyone. You need to work on yourself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Tall Guy is probably not interested.

Increasingly, nice guys are steering clear of intoxicated women. My SS liked a girl for two years of college, but didn’t want to be in a potentially morally, legally gray area with hitting on her when she was clearly impaired. Eventually, seeing her drunk every few weekends was a turn off.

[Anonymous]

Don't give your number to guys you are not interested in, idiot

[Anonymous]

How do you know Tall Guy thinks you are hot?

[Anonymous]

Wait, the whole area is socially awkward and reserved? I'm confused.

[Anonymous]

Girl, this is not that hard. If he liked you he would have gotten your number at the party or after through friends. Men are simple. If they like something , they go for it. See how the other guys did it with no issue?

[Anonymous]

This post is making me dizzy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If the guy you are interested in was interested in you, he would have asked for your number. If you were interested, you should have asked for his number.

If you were not interested in the two guys, you should never have given them your number. You've led them on by giving them your number. You need to find a polite way to tell them you are not interested and not just ghosting them. It's just obnoxious to give out your number then ghost them. If you were so drunk that you could not control yourself and gave out your number when you didn't want to, you have a drinking problem and need to have that addressed before you party again.

This. Op, you sound immature on so many levels.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So you think these two guys are so delicate that they can't handle rejection from a "pretty attractive" woman and will slander your name so much that you can't hang out with the group anymore, ruining your chances with hot guy? Yea, okay.

Most people are more mature than that, but if you are still worried, pull the ol' "thanks but I'm not dating at the moment so I can focus on myself". Yea, they'll see right through it, but it allows everyone to save some face.

For hot guy- if you wouldn't be embarrassed if he rejected you and word got out, then go ahead and ask a mutual friend for his info. If you would be embarrassed, then just bide your time and wait to run into him again. As for it being creepy, it depends on how hot he thinks you are. Hot= not creepy. Not hot=creepy. But in my experience, guys you have to push like this tend to make very little effort even if they are interested, or are only interested in sex and nothing else.

Thanks. I worry that the "not dating at the moment" thing might spread out and make me unable to date anyone else in the group- but I suppose you're right, they'll probably understand what it means and take it in kind. They seem like sweet dudes, so I also want to spare their feelings somewhat.

As for the hot guy, I know he thinks I'm hot, but him being lazy is part of my concern. But I'm not looking for anything super serious soulmatey, so I feel like it's fine if he's lazy. I'm honestly kind of bored since I moved to this city and I want someone to hang out with who I also want to bone. So he kind of fits the bill. Not that I'm looking for an f-buddy either. But I feel like if he's a lazy schmuck it won't annoy me too much (although it did occur to me)

So he’s lazy and you’re easy. You don’t need to date anyone. You need to work on yourself.

Truer words have never been spoken.