How do I tell the foodie hosting me I'm a very picky eater?

[Anonymous]

I would just say you like plain, not-spicy food. Eat b/f you go and do the best you can. Just ask for plain water when they ask what you want to drink.

[Anonymous]

Wow, OP -- water and tortilla chips? You really couldn't bring yourself to try anything else on the menu?

Yours is more than a food preference or aversion, it's an illness. Adults learn to broaden their palette and try new things.

[Anonymous]

OP, give us a rundown of your typical daily diet. I'm really curious. Have you traveled much in the U.S.? Ever been outside the country? I'm curious about people who've never learned to expand their palate. It's really weird, IMO.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would just say you like plain, not-spicy food. Eat b/f you go and do the best you can. Just ask for plain water when they ask what you want to drink.

The problem is OPs idea of plain is extreme. She thinks caprese salad and mexican are unusual.

I would just tell the host to buy me a box of teddy grahams.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Title says it all. I have to RSVP by tomorrow evening to avoid being rude and know you're supposed to mention any dietary restrictions when you RSVP. She is the hardest hardcore foodie. She routinely cooks things I've never even heard of. Like, I've heard of cornish game hens and venison, but she takes it 8 steps farther and has been known to fly food in from other COUNTRIES (I don't even know if that's legal!). I've already gotten out of a few dinner invitations by having her and her husband to my house twice, and meeting them at restaurants.

Here are my restrictions:
1. I physically CAN'T eat anything spicy. What you consider barely any spice, makes my mouth swell up and burns my tongue. A tiny bit of garlic or oregano or salt? Fine. Anything meant to make a dish "hot" = not fine.
2. I don't drink wine. Or soda. Or coffee or tea. I just want plain, cold water. Without lemon. Ice cubes are fine.
3. I don't really like any food that looks like "mush." Dark-colored sauce or gravy with stuff in it? Please no. I like to be able to look at my food and think "Oh. That's clearly a _____."

Here are regular dinners I've had as a guest at other people's homes that have been great:
1. Baked chicken (with rice and string beans)
2. Roast beef (baked potatoes, broccoli)
3. Manicotti/lasagna
4. Meatloaf (new potatoes, steamed cauliflower/broccoli)
5. Marinated salmon (rice pilaf, peas)
6. Scallops and shrimp in pasta (as long as it's sauce-free I'm happy)

Is this for real? Your foodie host should be shown proper respect and not be given a list of rules to follow to have you as a guest in HER home. If someone did this to me, and am a serious cook, not only would I be grossly offended but I might have to renege on my invite. Sorry but life is way to stressful than to have high maintenance guests in your home, when one entertains in their home they do it out of love and passion, put your finickiness aside and deal with it for one night!

THIS !!

[Anonymous]

Wow.

Just say you can't make it - or eat before you go and pretend. Don't tell anyone about your food issues because they will certainly be judging you.

[Anonymous]

Please decline this invitation.

At a later date, invite friend out for dinner and let her know you have serious food aversions (you do, it is not a case of being a picky eater, but of psychological food aversions). Then she will stop inviting you over or trying to get you to try new things. Easy.

[Anonymous]

It's like going to a water park and telling everyone else they can not get wet b/c you don't like to get wet. Do not go.

[Anonymous]

Well there are two sides to every story. Obviously you need to eat before you go. You can't expect a foodie to serve your grandmothers meals. On the other hand she should not nag you to eat more or expand your palate. Eat some crackers and practice your conversational skills. -- you are going to need the as you obviously don't like her cooking.

[Anonymous]

OP does not have an illness. Just decline the invitation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow, OP -- water and tortilla chips? You really couldn't bring yourself to try anything else on the menu?

Yours is more than a food preference or aversion, it's an illness. Adults learn to broaden their palette and try new things.

I HAVE tried new things. I just don't like a lot of them. The first time I ate strawberries with vinegar on them I (didn't know about the vinegar and) thought they'd gone horribly rotten. When I was in Mexico I tried chicken mole even though it looked like liquid shit on top of chicken. It tasted fine. I had an Indian roommate and tried her food numerous times and always wound up gulping tons of water. I was once given a complementary glass of OJ at a restaurant. When I took a sip it tasted wrong and mentioned it to the friend I was brunching with - she tasted it and laughed at me - it had champagne in it. I tried quinoa (didn't like it), some pasta dish my sister made (it would have been okay without the white sauce) - I try things regularly.

[Anonymous]

Do not go. A lot of people enjoy spicy with their meals. Do not spoil it for the others. Just call her and tell her your food problems and do not go, no matter what she says. This is not the type of party for you.

[Anonymous]

I wonder if these people who are calling the OP unrefined and immature are the same who have kids or understanding for kids who have sensory issues. And, if so, if they think that all kids will just outgrow those issues one day. I don't know any adult person who is picky just because. I am and, if I had to choose, I would definitely make the pickiness go away. It would make my life easier, interactions easier and I wouldn't get judged all the time.
I agree that people are not required to make food specially for me and, because of that, I rarely go to other people's houses for dinner. And I'm okay with that. But the bitchiness and judgement is really unnecessary.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow, OP -- water and tortilla chips? You really couldn't bring yourself to try anything else on the menu?

Yours is more than a food preference or aversion, it's an illness. Adults learn to broaden their palette and try new things.

I HAVE tried new things. I just don't like a lot of them. The first time I ate strawberries with vinegar on them I (didn't know about the vinegar and) thought they'd gone horribly rotten. When I was in Mexico I tried chicken mole even though it looked like liquid shit on top of chicken. It tasted fine. I had an Indian roommate and tried her food numerous times and always wound up gulping tons of water. I was once given a complementary glass of OJ at a restaurant. When I took a sip it tasted wrong and mentioned it to the friend I was brunching with - she tasted it and laughed at me - it had champagne in it. I tried quinoa (didn't like it), some pasta dish my sister made (it would have been okay without the white sauce) - I try things regularly.

So tell us your typical breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Do you have kids? If so, what do you prepare for them?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do not go. A lot of people enjoy spicy with their meals. Do not spoil it for the others. Just call her and tell her your food problems and do not go, no matter what she says. This is not the type of party for you.

Pretty much this. OP, your weird food problems do not trump the other guests. They, like most people going to dinner parties by people who like to cook, are probably really excited to try some delicious, flavorful food. Don't ruin it for them.

Deal with your food issues on your own (or with a therapist). Do not make it the burden of others.