18yo about to be let go from summer job because of phone use

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Tell her to keep her phone turned OFF before she starts her shift and keep it off until her shift is over. Maybe if she gets a break she can check her phone during the break, but then she should be sure to turn it off.

She should apologize to the manager and explain her plan for how she will act going forward. Tell her you expect her to work it out and keep her job.

This.

One of the worst disagreement I had with a direct report was when she had a text-related remote breakup with a boyfriend during the workday. This was a woman in her late 40s and a guy she met on OLD. She told me she needed to leave work because she was too upset. I was hangry so I told her it was ridiculous for her to be acting this way at work. I stand by that although I could have been nicer at the moment.

If there is idle time at work, she needs to ask her manager if there are additional tasks to be done. Or just rest.

If you want to talk to anyone beyond your DD, tell the boyfriend to learn some respect for your DD and her job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:man there is a lot going on here. First figure out if the boyfriend is being controlling and getting mad that she isn't available or if SHE is the one who wants to be in constant contact with the boyfriend. Either way it's a problem.

Definitely. This level of constant contact isn't healthy or normal, particularly as it's about to cost her a job.

[Anonymous]

It sounds bad but I mean, natural consequences.

If you're paying for the phone, stop paying for it.

Set rules for being home with no job.

[Anonymous]

It sounds like she has a boyfriend problem and a phone problem. Both are getting her fired.

[Anonymous]

Get her addiction under control before there's an even bigger fallout

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She says he’s mostly calling her, but I’d say it’s half and half. She is an extreme people pleaser and never says no to anyone. She doesn’t want to leave the phone at home. OP

She’s not an extreme people pleaser if she’s blowing off her boss and refusing to do as she is asked at work.

[Anonymous]

She’s learning a lesson in professionalism. Well, hopefully she is —sounds like she didn’t listen when the manager discussed it with her earlier on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She says he’s mostly calling her, but I’d say it’s half and half. She is an extreme people pleaser and never says no to anyone. She doesn’t want to leave the phone at home. OP

She’s not an extreme people pleaser if she’s blowing off her boss and refusing to do as she is asked at work.

+1

She sure didn’t seem to have any problems saying no to the manager, who didn’t want her on her phone at work. Which should’ve been obvious to begin with.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Leave the phone at home during work time. Job is more important than boyfriend. He does not respect her time and responsibilities.

+1

He sounds immature and so does she if she feels she has to answer his calls.

[Anonymous]

She can pick up another job or two. No need to sit around over the summer.

[Anonymous]

I made lots of mistakes at my first few jobs. Had to be spoken to many times about things that are now so obvious to me I cringe. But that was the learning experience. I also knew I could not lose the job, that my parents would have killed me, and that I needed spending money. In no world was sitting around at home for months an option. Be clear that she must do whatever she can to salvage the situation and you won’t be paying for the phone anymore if she gets fired. That might turn things around.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Tell her to keep her phone turned OFF before she starts her shift and keep it off until her shift is over. Maybe if she gets a break she can check her phone during the break, but then she should be sure to turn it off.

She should apologize to the manager and explain her plan for how she will act going forward. Tell her you expect her to work it out and keep her job.

This.

One of the worst disagreement I had with a direct report was when she had a text-related remote breakup with a boyfriend during the workday. This was a woman in her late 40s and a guy she met on OLD. She told me she needed to leave work because she was too upset. I was hangry so I told her it was ridiculous for her to be acting this way at work. I stand by that although I could have been nicer at the moment.

If there is idle time at work, she needs to ask her manager if there are additional tasks to be done. Or just rest.

If you want to talk to anyone beyond your DD, tell the boyfriend to learn some respect for your DD and her job.

You’re a b*

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She says he’s mostly calling her, but I’d say it’s half and half. She is an extreme people pleaser and never says no to anyone. She doesn’t want to leave the phone at home. OP

Okay. Choices come with consequences.

Same choices, same consequences. If she wants different consequences, she needs to make different choices.

She doesn't have to be home all summer. There are other jobs, temp staffing agencies, yard work as a self-employed person. She's an adult. Looking for a job can be a full-time job. If she doesn't want to do that, well, that's also a choice, and it can come with consequences, too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Tell her to keep her phone turned OFF before she starts her shift and keep it off until her shift is over. Maybe if she gets a break she can check her phone during the break, but then she should be sure to turn it off.

She should apologize to the manager and explain her plan for how she will act going forward. Tell her you expect her to work it out and keep her job.

This.

One of the worst disagreement I had with a direct report was when she had a text-related remote breakup with a boyfriend during the workday. This was a woman in her late 40s and a guy she met on OLD. She told me she needed to leave work because she was too upset. I was hangry so I told her it was ridiculous for her to be acting this way at work. I stand by that although I could have been nicer at the moment.

If there is idle time at work, she needs to ask her manager if there are additional tasks to be done. Or just rest.

If you want to talk to anyone beyond your DD, tell the boyfriend to learn some respect for your DD and her job.

You’re a b*

Nope, you're just wrong.

DP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP I can’t believe you are asking this question.

If my child got fired for something like this, the phone would be gone for the rest of the summer.

You created this problem.

This!