We started sharing it when we went to Europe for the oldest kids Hs grad gift. And it's never been turned off. We don't stalk, I mainly use it to only call if they are at home, not work or out. It's a safety item just like I share my u er rides with my partner, our kids share u er rides with us or their friends if they are solo |
If knowing your 18 yo is home safely in their dorm/apt on a Sat night at 2am helps you sleep track them. You can track their location/check it and not say anything to your kid if they are still at the frats/out. The issue comes when you are obsessed with it. I only track late at night (kid is female on a campus that borders a bad area and her apt is at edge of that area. So yes I might check late at night to make sure she's home safe. But if she isn't I rarely comment because I usually know where she is. But I rarely mention anything about it. It's a safety tool for us |
I would help with flights because that is what friends and family do--I help my husband if he has that happen as well. But I would never do any of the others--that is totally on them |
I guess that makes sense, but I don't want to know where my adult kids are! As far as the OP, I think no news is good news. There isn't anything you can do anyway. |
+1. You never stop being family/a parent. I only contacted a teacher once since MS because my kid tried everything in HS to resolve it and got nowhere so they asked for help. Notice, they attempted to solve it themselves but when that got them nowhere I assisted. Because 14 is too young to just say "oh well you tried now deal with it" |
then you don't check their location. We don't meddle, we don't stalk but when we are in Europe/asia/nyc/any large city in USA where we don't live it's nice to know where they are if needed. On a normal week I might check once for my college kid and rarely for my 26 yo |
Have you sought therapy for your anxiety? Asking sincerely. I love my kids but I’m not particularly anxious about them.
My mom’s anxiety was so irritating, though. I hope you aren’t constantly asking for reassurance (when will you be home, call when you get there, etc) bc it’s annoying to have to manage another person’s anxiety. |
I think that's too much information. What if she is at a party and just crashes for the night with a friend instead of going to her dorm? I used to do that. It was safer than walking home in the middle of the night. Or, what if she's with a new boyfriend you don't know about? What would you do with this info? Call her right away? I mean, unless she's in a foreign country inexplicably, what would you do anyway? Of course, I used to travel places in college and didn't tell my parents everything. |
Ugh, I would hate this so, so much. I guess the key is to make sure the reassurance you seek does not annoy the heck out of the person you are asking. |
Why do adult children share their locations? This seems weird. Ask all the Life 360 users: - 83.7 million Global Monthly Active Users - 45.3 million U.S. Monthly Active Users |
That isn’t normal and you don’t have to live that way. Therapy and drugs may help you. Look into it. |
I'd do nothing with the information. She happily shares location with us. And I check at most once a week, many times it's less than that. I also see her credit card bills, because I pay them. So yes, I also asked her once, why are you taking Ubers when you have your car? And I learned it's because some bars allow underaged kids, so they pre-party/drink at home and uber there. I was just curious why she was Ubering. Happy to pay for it all, but since I'm also paying for a car, I was curious why |
You don't share your solo uber rides with a friend/loved one at 10pm from the airport or to a hotel in a new city? Most people I know do that, my husband does that. Simple safety Most kids do not care, they track 100+ other friends and have that many tracking them. Now my kids would care if I was constantly asking them about where are they, what were they doing, etc. But I rarely do that. |
+1 But I have never used location trackers for my kids. |
Just understand this all comes full circle. When your kids are 50 they will want your location because they will wonder why 80 year old mom is randomly in Kansas when you live in DC. Not that extreme, but a parent with dementia can start doing odd things. |