Locker Room Teasing

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would have him ask the other kids why they are looking at his underwear. I’d tell him to say that’s a weird thing to be looking at.

Never do this. Kids can smell "mom gave me a retort" and double their efforts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Conscious that there are some weirdo’s using these forums to get their kicks, so please be mindful of what you share.

My DS 11 has just started at his new middle school, generally settling in well and has made a few new friends as well as a couple who followed from elementary. He’s a nice kid, generally gets on well with everyone even if not close friends, not one to cause trouble or pick on others etc. He is quite sensitive though, not overly so but also not crazy confident and loud.

He’s confided in me this afternoon that a few of the kids he doesn’t know have been making unkind comments when they’ve been changing for gym class, laughing at him and calling him a baby because he wears briefs not boxers/trunks as the majority of others seem to.

It’s his choice, he has always found them more comfortable since potty training - over the years I’ve bought him different underwear to try a few times (usually because they had a favourite character on and he wanted them!) but he’s never got on well with them, and they always end up shoved to the back of his drawer or worn as PJs. Fair enough, I wouldn’t want to wear something I found uncomfortable either! Glad he knows his mind and despite not being too confident he’s been assertive to make his own choices.

I don’t want him getting ahead of hard time and being bullied about it though, from my distant memories of middle school it can be tough enough without making yourself stand out and giving those who want to bully ammunition. I did ask whether it was just him, but he said there are a couple of other boys who got laughed at too.

Now I’m torn, the confident adult in me wants to tell him to own it, he should do him and let them do them etc. Why should he be uncomfortable just because of what others think, about something which is very much a personal choice and absolutely nothing to do with them? Besides, whilst not being male and having no first hand experience, I’d have thought briefs may be a better option for sports - particularly as the boys get older?

On the other hand, is this a hill to die on? Is it worth putting a target on his back over? Would it be kinder to gently encourage him to consider wearing boxers on the days he’s got to change for gym, even if he doesn’t really like them, just so he’s not singling himself out for ridicule?

Why do some kids have to make mountains out of the strangest molehills?

Arnold Schwarzenegger wore briefs in public.

Most kids are stupid. Most kids aren't confident and strong enough to overcome stupid kids. Your kid has to either grow an unusually thick skin, grow unusually large muscles, or conform to fashion, or get out of the environment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Conscious that there are some weirdo’s using these forums to get their kicks, so please be mindful of what you share.

My DS 11 has just started at his new middle school, generally settling in well and has made a few new friends as well as a couple who followed from elementary. He’s a nice kid, generally gets on well with everyone even if not close friends, not one to cause trouble or pick on others etc. He is quite sensitive though, not overly so but also not crazy confident and loud.

He’s confided in me this afternoon that a few of the kids he doesn’t know have been making unkind comments when they’ve been changing for gym class, laughing at him and calling him a baby because he wears briefs not boxers/trunks as the majority of others seem to.

It’s his choice, he has always found them more comfortable since potty training - over the years I’ve bought him different underwear to try a few times (usually because they had a favourite character on and he wanted them!) but he’s never got on well with them, and they always end up shoved to the back of his drawer or worn as PJs. Fair enough, I wouldn’t want to wear something I found uncomfortable either! Glad he knows his mind and despite not being too confident he’s been assertive to make his own choices.

I don’t want him getting ahead of hard time and being bullied about it though, from my distant memories of middle school it can be tough enough without making yourself stand out and giving those who want to bully ammunition. I did ask whether it was just him, but he said there are a couple of other boys who got laughed at too.

Now I’m torn, the confident adult in me wants to tell him to own it, he should do him and let them do them etc. Why should he be uncomfortable just because of what others think, about something which is very much a personal choice and absolutely nothing to do with them? Besides, whilst not being male and having no first hand experience, I’d have thought briefs may be a better option for sports - particularly as the boys get older?

On the other hand, is this a hill to die on? Is it worth putting a target on his back over? Would it be kinder to gently encourage him to consider wearing boxers on the days he’s got to change for gym, even if he doesn’t really like them, just so he’s not singling himself out for ridicule?

Why do some kids have to make mountains out of the strangest molehills?

Arnold Schwarzenegger wore briefs in public.

Most kids are stupid. Most kids aren't confident and strong enough to overcome stupid kids. Your kid has to either grow an unusually thick skin, grow unusually large muscles, or conform to fashion, or get out of the environment.

Thanks for all those choices!

[Anonymous]

I have a difficult time believing that any of the kids have any interest in seeing what kind of underwear their classmates have. I think a lot of kids would prefer to go commando anyway.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He should tell them he thinks briefs show off his package better and mock their penis sizes

Do you want your kid to be a sex offender? Saying anything like that is weird and gross.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As you can see, OP, so much of this behavior is learned from parents. Children of mean girls/bullies are going to end up being bullies themselves.

Agree

If he doesn’t want all the extra cloth under his slacks or or shorts and prefers briefs so what. He should wear briefs.

That’s what every country outside of America does.

He should respond that he’s European and they should Piss Off and get out more.

Boxers are for insecure Americans who like to pretend their junk is so big they must have boxers chafing away so their big junk can swing away.

Thank goodness you don’t live in Florida where the private schools boys junk is so big they just free ball and don’t wear anything underneath in the hot humidity.

Truth.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As you can see, OP, so much of this behavior is learned from parents. Children of mean girls/bullies are going to end up being bullies themselves.

No one is bullying OP, Sally. Everyone is giving practical advice. If we supported bullying, we’d tell OP to send her kid to school in an Elmo thong.

Huh?

You’ll all caring to peer pressure yet have zero premises for doing so other than the Loudmouth Bully Kid wears boxers. Lame.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So glad our fcps ms abandoned changing for pe.

Ours just has intramural sports before school, after school or period 1 or 8, depending on field or facilities scheduling.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As you can see, OP, so much of this behavior is learned from parents. Children of mean girls/bullies are going to end up being bullies themselves.

Agree

If he doesn’t want all the extra cloth under his slacks or or shorts and prefers briefs so what. He should wear briefs.

That’s what every country outside of America does.

He should respond that he’s European and they should Piss Off and get out more.

Boxers are for insecure Americans who like to pretend their junk is so big they must have boxers chafing away so their big junk can swing away.

Thank goodness you don’t live in Florida where the private schools boys junk is so big they just free ball and don’t wear anything underneath in the hot humidity.

Truth.

Ummm why are you perving on school boys packages?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:


Just get anything like these. Problem solved.

Agree, good hybrid solution. And European!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would have him ask the other kids why they are looking at his underwear. I’d tell him to say that’s a weird thing to be looking at.

+1

Best answer/advice. On this thread. That will shut them up real quick

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As you can see, OP, so much of this behavior is learned from parents. Children of mean girls/bullies are going to end up being bullies themselves.

Agree

If he doesn’t want all the extra cloth under his slacks or or shorts and prefers briefs so what. He should wear briefs.

That’s what every country outside of America does.

He should respond that he’s European and they should Piss Off and get out more.

Boxers are for insecure Americans who like to pretend their junk is so big they must have boxers chafing away so their big junk can swing away.

Thank goodness you don’t live in Florida where the private schools boys junk is so big they just free ball and don’t wear anything underneath in the hot humidity.

Truth.

Ummm why are you perving on school boys packages?

No one is perving. Thats what we say, boxers are more comfortable because I’m so big.

Be happy you don’t play baseball.

-Man

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would have him ask the other kids why they are looking at his underwear. I’d tell him to say that’s a weird thing to be looking at.

+1

Best answer/advice. On this thread. That will shut them up real quick

Literally won’t shut them up at all. Will kick the situation up a notch.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As you can see, OP, so much of this behavior is learned from parents. Children of mean girls/bullies are going to end up being bullies themselves.

No one is bullying OP, Sally. Everyone is giving practical advice. If we supported bullying, we’d tell OP to send her kid to school in an Elmo thong.

Huh?

You’ll all caring to peer pressure yet have zero premises for doing so other than the Loudmouth Bully Kid wears boxers. Lame.

Ok, so you send your 11 boy to school and tell him to stand up for his underwear rights in the middle of the locker room while wearing his briefs. How do you think that will go?

OP’s kid doesn’t like being teased about his underwear, the practical advice is just to switch underwear.

Your advice is what?
-That he makes one of these stupid retorts that the toddler moms are throwing out?
-That he just “ignores it?” So he can keep being the butt of the joke?

It’s a stupid situation, it’s an easy fix. Kids don’t need to go all Norma Rae over every little stupid issue.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would have him ask the other kids why they are looking at his underwear. I’d tell him to say that’s a weird thing to be looking at.

No. just get him some briefs. Amazon under armour ones.