Dating across the political aisle

[Anonymous]

My DH is a D but his whole family is Republican, including some MAGA losers. It’s very stressful and he’s basically estranged from his family now.

Definitely don’t marry a R and it’s even worth a pause if they come from a Republican family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As a black woman, no. That’s something I can’t compromise on.

Same.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Two words: bodily autonomy. I would never date a republican.

But a democrat Pfizer exec would be fine. My body, my choice, unless it’s sponsored by Pfizer

I also wouldn’t date someone with poor reasoning skills. ^^

I wouldn't date a hypocrite ^^

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Depends which part of conservative or liberal they are. I could not be with someone longterm who was really into the culture wars on either side. Fiscal conservatism versus quasi-socialism, sure. Debates on health care policy, sure. Debates on abortion or gay marriage or immigration or religious freedom - nope, I know where I stand on those, for moral and cultural/religious reasons, and I am not interested in being with someone whose beliefs are so opposed to mine that we disagree on issues so fundamental to my world view.

I can be friends with folks with diametrically opposing views. Partly by not talking about them. But I couldn't be life partners with such a person, not because I think they're bad people, but because it would drive me crazy every time we talked.

+1 I could date a fiscal conservative but not somebody who thinks being gay or trans people shouldn't exist or that women shouldn't have control of their health decisions. And, if they like Trump I would assume they are either shockingly stupid or completely morally repugnant.

+1

My close fiscally conservative friend is the loudest anti-Trump person I know. And a huge feminist.

The GOP that exists in 2023 is broken beyond repair.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Two words: bodily autonomy. I would never date a republican.

But a democrat Pfizer exec would be fine. My body, my choice, unless it’s sponsored by Pfizer

I also wouldn’t date someone with poor reasoning skills. ^^

I wouldn't date a hypocrite ^^

Thanks for proving my point.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Depends which part of conservative or liberal they are. I could not be with someone longterm who was really into the culture wars on either side. Fiscal conservatism versus quasi-socialism, sure. Debates on health care policy, sure. Debates on abortion or gay marriage or immigration or religious freedom - nope, I know where I stand on those, for moral and cultural/religious reasons, and I am not interested in being with someone whose beliefs are so opposed to mine that we disagree on issues so fundamental to my world view.

I can be friends with folks with diametrically opposing views. Partly by not talking about them. But I couldn't be life partners with such a person, not because I think they're bad people, but because it would drive me crazy every time we talked.

+1. Disagreeing on abortion - nope. Disagreeing on the success of the welfare reform- sure, makes dinner conversations more fun.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Two words: bodily autonomy. I would never date a republican.

But a democrat Pfizer exec would be fine. My body, my choice, unless it’s sponsored by Pfizer

This makes no sense. Are you trying to make an anti-vax statement?

You can't claim to be the party of bodily autonomy while forcing people to put things into their bodies. NP

NP. These aren’t the same thing. When abortion is made illegal the source for the service goes away and women no longer have the legal right to make choices on their own behalf over their own bodies. In some states the desire is to make these restrictions absolute, with no exceptions. Women truly are denied the right to bodily autonomy.

Vaccination would be the same if it were truly compulsory: a forced injection. But vaccination policies (mostly? Always?) only require that one be vaccinated as a condition of employment or to use a service, and there are exemptions of various kinds for religious etc. reasons. Individuals still have the right to choose whether or not to be vaccinated, and have had to bear the social consequences of that choice, which is ethically reasonable. For students in public schools, “mandatory” vaccination and related laws have existed for decades, strongly suggesting that “mandatory” vaccination does not undermine freedom of consent.

[Anonymous]

I couldn’t date a man who was anti-abortion or held toxic “red pill” views. Otherwise don’t care about politics as long as they are not truly extreme. I probably would have trouble dating someone actively involved in election denial.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Two words: bodily autonomy. I would never date a republican.

But a democrat Pfizer exec would be fine. My body, my choice, unless it’s sponsored by Pfizer

This makes no sense. Are you trying to make an anti-vax statement?

You can't claim to be the party of bodily autonomy while forcing people to put things into their bodies. NP

NP. These aren’t the same thing. When abortion is made illegal the source for the service goes away and women no longer have the legal right to make choices on their own behalf over their own bodies. In some states the desire is to make these restrictions absolute, with no exceptions. Women truly are denied the right to bodily autonomy.

Vaccination would be the same if it were truly compulsory: a forced injection. But vaccination policies (mostly? Always?) only require that one be vaccinated as a condition of employment or to use a service, and there are exemptions of various kinds for religious etc. reasons. Individuals still have the right to choose whether or not to be vaccinated, and have had to bear the social consequences of that choice, which is ethically reasonable. For students in public schools, “mandatory” vaccination and related laws have existed for decades, strongly suggesting that “mandatory” vaccination does not undermine freedom of consent.

I am pro-choice and anti-mandate and agree 100%. Should we date???

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So last month, WaPo did a piece on the "political mismatch" of dating among millennials and GenZ. I found the article silly, but poignant.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/2023/11/22/marriage-polarization-dating-trump/

Jumping right into the topic - what are your thoughts? Would you consider dating someone who thinks differently than you, politically? Are you in a mixed-political marriage or LTR?

I think I would be open to dating someone outside of my politics, even though I'm pretty firmly on the left. I like to hear others' point of views and I think different ideologies bring different things to the table and expose blind spots of others. While I'm left-leaning on economics and the environment, i appreciate conservative arguments on some cultural issues. I think if a conservative or right-leaning man were interested in dating me, I'd give him a chance.

I think it's really hard to do now because we've wrapped political identity into actual identity and make value judgements based on it.

In my own 20+ year marriage we both started out as moderate - I was more left, he was more right - but now it's hugely divisive. I wouldn't date my spouse now if we met under the same circumstances as we did a couple of decades ago and I've thought of divorce many times in the last several years. I don't really feel like I know the person I am married to anymore, and I think he feels the same about me.

[Anonymous]

I’ve dated republican men (not trumpers). I’ve learned that I’m fine with fiscal conservatives. But the ones who are anti gay, racist, or want to regulate women’s bodies are a hard no.

[Anonymous]

I am quite liberal and have friends who are moderate/lite C. I couldn’t imagine dating anyone seriously that had differing views on certain issues.

My mom dated/married a guy who is more conservative than her and idk how she does it. He starts spewing whatever garbage Fox News is on about recently (usually patently false too) and she just rolls her eyes. My dh likes to challenge him since he can never back up anything he says.

But anyways, no. Couldn’t date someone with views I personally see as stripping rights away from others.

[Anonymous]

I'm a liberal man and my college girlfriend was conservative. It worked fine in college but would not have worked in the real world.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Two words: bodily autonomy. I would never date a republican.

But a democrat Pfizer exec would be fine. My body, my choice, unless it’s sponsored by Pfizer

This makes no sense. Are you trying to make an anti-vax statement?

You can't claim to be the party of bodily autonomy while forcing people to put things into their bodies. NP

NP. These aren’t the same thing. When abortion is made illegal the source for the service goes away and women no longer have the legal right to make choices on their own behalf over their own bodies. In some states the desire is to make these restrictions absolute, with no exceptions. Women truly are denied the right to bodily autonomy.

Vaccination would be the same if it were truly compulsory: a forced injection. But vaccination policies (mostly? Always?) only require that one be vaccinated as a condition of employment or to use a service, and there are exemptions of various kinds for religious etc. reasons. Individuals still have the right to choose whether or not to be vaccinated, and have had to bear the social consequences of that choice, which is ethically reasonable. For students in public schools, “mandatory” vaccination and related laws have existed for decades, strongly suggesting that “mandatory” vaccination does not undermine freedom of consent.

LOL, starving people out to get them to vaccinate is the antithesis of freedom. Stopping citizens from free movement is a 4th amendment violation and hardly ethical.
And schools never required flu shots for students, because like covid, flu shot does not offer sterilizing immunity. You still get and transmit covid with the shot. How many times have you been boosted for Chickenpox? Probably never, because getting the virus once or one shot as a kid renders immunity. Not so with Covid.
So again, forcing people to put something in their body is taking away bodily autonomy. There is no two ways around it.

[Anonymous]

I'm a staunch moderate/centrist democrat and a GenXer. I would prefer to only date democrats but since my type is 40-55 year old white dudes, I end up dating a fair number of republicans. It's not ideal, but it can work if they're not MAGA and think trump is crazy. Current BF is a moderate republican, fiscally conservative-Ish but socially liberal. There are a lot of those around here.