Private school keeps asking which holidays we celebrate

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If it's a Christian (or other religion) school, I doubt they are worried about "offending" OP with religious talk or that they will provide alternate assignments based on OP's religion. A primary function of most religious schools are to teach religion.
However if they find that many of their students are of a different culture (not even necessarily a different religion) and will be taking a holiday off to observe, the school might alter their schedule to avoid disruption.
For example, if they already know several months (or even a year) in advance that multiple children will not be in school on X date, they might avoid scheduling class pictures or the school chorus concert or something that day.

That argument doesn't fit here since they are asking mid-year. The family doesn't care which holidays the kid will celebrate otherwise they would have spoken to the school about it. Pressing for that information is not necessary. It sounds like the school has nothing better to do.

Mid year is when they start planning NEXT years calendar, so it does fit here if they are expecting OP's kid will still be at the school next year.

Op here. I doubt that's it. There are 3 or so families from our same culture at the school. I have already been asked several times this question and I replied our child can celebrate all of the holidays just like everyone else. They are making it a big deal by bringing it up so much and it's getting uncomfortable.
In the email to the director reminded us they are a Presbyterian school as if we didn't know that and even mentioned if we don't celebrate these holidays perhaps the school isn't right for us. So now do you see why we may not want to disclose which holidays we don't celebrate? Our particular religion doesn't have a lot of options because it's so rare. I am looking into secular schools for next year. Both my husband and I went to Baptist missionary schools but we lived in a country where the majority of the population wasn't Christian.

That was hostile. I would find another school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If it's a Christian (or other religion) school, I doubt they are worried about "offending" OP with religious talk or that they will provide alternate assignments based on OP's religion. A primary function of most religious schools are to teach religion.
However if they find that many of their students are of a different culture (not even necessarily a different religion) and will be taking a holiday off to observe, the school might alter their schedule to avoid disruption.
For example, if they already know several months (or even a year) in advance that multiple children will not be in school on X date, they might avoid scheduling class pictures or the school chorus concert or something that day.

That argument doesn't fit here since they are asking mid-year. The family doesn't care which holidays the kid will celebrate otherwise they would have spoken to the school about it. Pressing for that information is not necessary. It sounds like the school has nothing better to do.

Mid year is when they start planning NEXT years calendar, so it does fit here if they are expecting OP's kid will still be at the school next year.

Op here. I doubt that's it. There are 3 or so families from our same culture at the school. I have already been asked several times this question and I replied our child can celebrate all of the holidays just like everyone else. They are making it a big deal by bringing it up so much and it's getting uncomfortable.
In the email to the director reminded us they are a Presbyterian school as if we didn't know that and even mentioned if we don't celebrate these holidays perhaps the school isn't right for us. So now do you see why we may not want to disclose which holidays we don't celebrate? Our particular religion doesn't have a lot of options because it's so rare. I am looking into secular schools for next year. Both my husband and I went to Baptist missionary schools but we lived in a country where the majority of the population wasn't Christian.

That was hostile. I would find another school.

They are not unhappy your kid took a spot that could have gone to a Christian family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:People like OP drive me crazy. You’re part of a community! Who is trying to be courteous! Be part of society and tell them.
They want to know so your kid doesn’t make a Christmas ornament craft if you don’t celebrate Christmas. So they can make sure the coloring page matches the holiday that resonates with the kid. Probably little things like that.

Yes, this. And the school knows some people will pitch a fit if their kid is accidentally grouped into the wrong holiday group. Those parents will get mad about school making assumptions and not being inclusive, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If it's a Christian (or other religion) school, I doubt they are worried about "offending" OP with religious talk or that they will provide alternate assignments based on OP's religion. A primary function of most religious schools are to teach religion.
However if they find that many of their students are of a different culture (not even necessarily a different religion) and will be taking a holiday off to observe, the school might alter their schedule to avoid disruption.
For example, if they already know several months (or even a year) in advance that multiple children will not be in school on X date, they might avoid scheduling class pictures or the school chorus concert or something that day.

That argument doesn't fit here since they are asking mid-year. The family doesn't care which holidays the kid will celebrate otherwise they would have spoken to the school about it. Pressing for that information is not necessary. It sounds like the school has nothing better to do.

Mid year is when they start planning NEXT years calendar, so it does fit here if they are expecting OP's kid will still be at the school next year.

Op here. I doubt that's it. There are 3 or so families from our same culture at the school. I have already been asked several times this question and I replied our child can celebrate all of the holidays just like everyone else. They are making it a big deal by bringing it up so much and it's getting uncomfortable.
In the email to the director reminded us they are a Presbyterian school as if we didn't know that and even mentioned if we don't celebrate these holidays perhaps the school isn't right for us. So now do you see why we may not want to disclose which holidays we don't celebrate? Our particular religion doesn't have a lot of options because it's so rare. I am looking into secular schools for next year. Both my husband and I went to Baptist missionary schools but we lived in a country where the majority of the population wasn't Christian.

It's clear that there is a problem that your family does not celebrate these holidays. OP, are you sure that your kid has not been making statements in class about not celebrating/believing?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The school likely doesn't want to to offend you. They want to make an inclusive environment I think it's kind of overkill too but what's the big deal about completing a form in a private school? They want to know what holidays the families who pay good money in tuition celebrate.

Clearly op won’t be offended. Not everyone is a delicate flower who needs to be catered to. Maybe they’re atheists who are open to all religions?

OP clearly IS a delicate flower because literally an innocuous form and email offends her.

[Anonymous]

Just tell them. You’re the one who made this into a big deal by not filling in the form, then later bringing up the fact you don’t celebrate a Christmas, refusing to answer which holiday you DO celebrate, and then posting about it here.

Which holiday is it btw? We at DCUM NEED to know!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The school likely doesn't want to to offend you. They want to make an inclusive environment I think it's kind of overkill too but what's the big deal about completing a form in a private school? They want to know what holidays the families who pay good money in tuition celebrate.

Because they don't think it's important for the school to know. Those forms have multiple questions such as the kid's favorite color. A lot of Hindu families leave it blank because they don't care if the kid learns about Christmas. It's a given if the school is Christian. Should the school also not talk about god? Kind of ridiculous to expect that so most don't say anything because they don't want special treatment.

I completely see your point and agree with you. I would not want special treatment either. It sounds like inclusion overkill. Maybe they got sued at one point or had parents complain about their celebrations not being included so they go overboard. Maybe cut them a break.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The school likely doesn't want to to offend you. They want to make an inclusive environment I think it's kind of overkill too but what's the big deal about completing a form in a private school? They want to know what holidays the families who pay good money in tuition celebrate.

Clearly op won’t be offended. Not everyone is a delicate flower who needs to be catered to. Maybe they’re atheists who are open to all religions?

OP clearly IS a delicate flower because literally an innocuous form and email offends her.

Op can correct me if I’m wrong, but I don’t think offended is the right word, but rather “annoyed” that the school is being pushy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The school likely doesn't want to to offend you. They want to make an inclusive environment I think it's kind of overkill too but what's the big deal about completing a form in a private school? They want to know what holidays the families who pay good money in tuition celebrate.

Because they don't think it's important for the school to know. Those forms have multiple questions such as the kid's favorite color. A lot of Hindu families leave it blank because they don't care if the kid learns about Christmas. It's a given if the school is Christian. Should the school also not talk about god? Kind of ridiculous to expect that so most don't say anything because they don't want special treatment.

I completely see your point and agree with you. I would not want special treatment either. It sounds like inclusion overkill. Maybe they got sued at one point or had parents complain about their celebrations not being included so they go overboard. Maybe cut them a break.

Parents who send their kid to a religious school that is not their religion have no right to complain when their religion is not accommodated. It's baffling when people do this. I see it a lot on the college board--people want their kid to go to a Catholic college, but then complain that it's too Catholic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The school likely doesn't want to to offend you. They want to make an inclusive environment I think it's kind of overkill too but what's the big deal about completing a form in a private school? They want to know what holidays the families who pay good money in tuition celebrate.

Clearly op won’t be offended. Not everyone is a delicate flower who needs to be catered to. Maybe they’re atheists who are open to all religions?

OP clearly IS a delicate flower because literally an innocuous form and email offends her.

Op can correct me if I’m wrong, but I don’t think offended is the right word, but rather “annoyed” that the school is being pushy.

Pretty small thing to be annoyed by. I'm sticking with "delicate flower."

[Anonymous]

I wish I knew this information too on teachers. It would make it nicer when I'm giving gifts or writing thank you cards to them. People get so offended if you say the wrong thing, so I'd like to make sure I'm greeting people how they wish to be greeted. This year our teacher is Middle Eastern, but I've seen her wearing Christmas tree sweaters.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The school likely doesn't want to to offend you. They want to make an inclusive environment I think it's kind of overkill too but what's the big deal about completing a form in a private school? They want to know what holidays the families who pay good money in tuition celebrate.

Because they don't think it's important for the school to know. Those forms have multiple questions such as the kid's favorite color. A lot of Hindu families leave it blank because they don't care if the kid learns about Christmas. It's a given if the school is Christian. Should the school also not talk about god? Kind of ridiculous to expect that so most don't say anything because they don't want special treatment.

I completely see your point and agree with you. I would not want special treatment either. It sounds like inclusion overkill. Maybe they got sued at one point or had parents complain about their celebrations not being included so they go overboard. Maybe cut them a break.

Parents who send their kid to a religious school that is not their religion have no right to complain when their religion is not accommodated. It's baffling when people do this. I see it a lot on the college board--people want their kid to go to a Catholic college, but then complain that it's too Catholic.

Op isn’t doing that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wish I knew this information too on teachers. It would make it nicer when I'm giving gifts or writing thank you cards to them. People get so offended if you say the wrong thing, so I'd like to make sure I'm greeting people how they wish to be greeted. This year our teacher is Middle Eastern, but I've seen her wearing Christmas tree sweaters.

Say happy holidays. No reason to ask someone their religion. It’s nosy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The school likely doesn't want to to offend you. They want to make an inclusive environment I think it's kind of overkill too but what's the big deal about completing a form in a private school? They want to know what holidays the families who pay good money in tuition celebrate.

Clearly op won’t be offended. Not everyone is a delicate flower who needs to be catered to. Maybe they’re atheists who are open to all religions?

OP clearly IS a delicate flower because literally an innocuous form and email offends her.

Op can correct me if I’m wrong, but I don’t think offended is the right word, but rather “annoyed” that the school is being pushy.

Not only are they being pushy but also suggesting the school might not be a good fit when they mentioned they don’t celebrate Christmas. That’s hostile and unnecessary.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The school likely doesn't want to to offend you. They want to make an inclusive environment I think it's kind of overkill too but what's the big deal about completing a form in a private school? They want to know what holidays the families who pay good money in tuition celebrate.

Because they don't think it's important for the school to know. Those forms have multiple questions such as the kid's favorite color. A lot of Hindu families leave it blank because they don't care if the kid learns about Christmas. It's a given if the school is Christian. Should the school also not talk about god? Kind of ridiculous to expect that so most don't say anything because they don't want special treatment.

I completely see your point and agree with you. I would not want special treatment either. It sounds like inclusion overkill. Maybe they got sued at one point or had parents complain about their celebrations not being included so they go overboard. Maybe cut them a break.

Parents who send their kid to a religious school that is not their religion have no right to complain when their religion is not accommodated. It's baffling when people do this. I see it a lot on the college board--people want their kid to go to a Catholic college, but then complain that it's too Catholic.

But people DO do this all the time and sometimes it ends up on the news. The school is right to be overly careful and inclusive, I think.