Why Aren’t More People Getting Married? Ask Women What Dating Is Like.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I read that piece and agree that there is some "male drift." Most college educated women I know want to marry professional men.

Also, sociology 101 shows that in populations where men are outnumbered by women, there are lower rates of marriage because men do not need to try to "lock down" women. Instead, they take the advantage of the availability of casual relationships, sometimes more than one at the same time.

Making up new jargon as quoted I'm the article to explain away the obvious that many women can't seem to cope with, and runs counter to the woke/progressive narrative peddled by the MSM, is not helpful. "Male drift" means what?

An obese unattractive unskilled unemployed or minimum wage baby mama in her 30s is.going to attract her male equivalent.

A professional woman in her mid 30s with a sketchy relationship history, emotional problems, attachment disorders, obsessed with feminism and woke politics, who is at best a "5" with a thick coat of makeup in dim lighting, but who believes she us too good for her male equivalent, is.going to be constantly frustrated.

A sexy attractive or even just average pretty girl next door type who is not overweight and actually likes men, does not have personality disorders or mental issues, and has realistic expectations in relationships, will have no problems at all. If she wants a good solid man for marriage she needs to be willing to have his children and raise them. Sure she can have a career but should be willing to prioritize caring for the children above that.

After all is she is looking for a family man doesn't she need to be a family woman?

If you are happily married, why do you care what single people do? Doth do protest too much, methinks.

It’s sad that this is the pitiful narrative you’re preaching to your children. Your sons will grow up hating women and treating them as objects, and your daughters will have some serious complexes.

Your lack of self love and support comes across as very sad to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is a guest editorial in NYTimes.

https://www.nytimes.com/2023/11/11/opinion/marriage-women-men-dating.html

I agree with the DCUM consensus that women can now afford to be picky because they have higher educations and incomes. But the author suggests that modern men are not emotionally available. Nonsense, - men were not emotionally available in previous generations either, but people still got married! The author calls for policies such as supporting single parents and higher ed cost reform. If you subsidize single parents, then you get more of them. If you want to increase marriage rates, then you need to start burning witches, bachelors, and spinsters.

Are women too picky? The article mentions an anthropologists book about egg freezing that mention "online ageism" and has a taxonomic Table 1.1 of cads. Or consider the author's college friend, who must be in her forties now:

One of these friends, with whom I went to college, would like nothing more than to be married. She’s beautiful and successful, and not, as far as I can tell, overly “picky.” She has had long-term relationships in the past, and cherishes the intimacy and stability they provide. To that end, she keeps a post-it note on a bulletin board. On it, she has drawn out 10 lines of 10 circles each. Every time she goes on a date with someone new, she fills in a circle. She’s committed to going on at least a hundred dates as she searches for a male partner with whom she can have a family. In two years, she’s filled in nearly half of the circles, and she’s still single. It’s like an SAT test form where every answer is incorrect. When she asks her male friends to set her up with their friends, they consistently tell her that no one they know would be good enough for her. “It’s like, how bad are you guys?” she marvels.

Yes, this friend sounds too picky.

[Anonymous]

Uh the quality of men on the market was never great. It used to be that women “had” to get married and fast. Now they don’t have to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I reject the premise that getting married is some optimal goal/outcome.

Agreed. I’m in my 40s and know far more people getting divorced or already divorced, than happy couples. And the divorced women are HAPPY! Truly living their best lives after getting rid of dead weight. For them, marriage wasn’t everything it was cracked up to be.

I think this OP was started by a young married woman in her 20s that’s trying to justify her life choice. OP you need to realize that many single women and men are happy just the way they are, and lead very satisfying lives and don’t want to be married. I know you can’t stand to hear that, but it’s the truth. Accept it and move on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I read that piece and agree that there is some "male drift." Most college educated women I know want to marry professional men.

Also, sociology 101 shows that in populations where men are outnumbered by women, there are lower rates of marriage because men do not need to try to "lock down" women. Instead, they take the advantage of the availability of casual relationships, sometimes more than one at the same time.

Making up new jargon as quoted I'm the article to explain away the obvious that many women can't seem to cope with, and runs counter to the woke/progressive narrative peddled by the MSM, is not helpful. "Male drift" means what?

An obese unattractive unskilled unemployed or minimum wage baby mama in her 30s is.going to attract her male equivalent.

A professional woman in her mid 30s with a sketchy relationship history, emotional problems, attachment disorders, obsessed with feminism and woke politics, who is at best a "5" with a thick coat of makeup in dim lighting, but who believes she us too good for her male equivalent, is.going to be constantly frustrated.

A sexy attractive or even just average pretty girl next door type who is not overweight and actually likes men, does not have personality disorders or mental issues, and has realistic expectations in relationships, will have no problems at all. If she wants a good solid man for marriage she needs to be willing to have his children and raise them. Sure she can have a career but should be willing to prioritize caring for the children above that.

After all is she is looking for a family man doesn't she need to be a family woman?

If you are happily married, why do you care what single people do? Doth do protest too much, methinks.

It’s sad that this is the pitiful narrative you’re preaching to your children. Your sons will grow up hating women and treating them as objects, and your daughters will have some serious complexes.

Your lack of self love and support comes across as very sad to me.

What did you you disagree with from this post? Why did you think this narrative was pitiful? Are you one of the women who is constantly frustrated the poster wrote about?

[Anonymous]

This article is a weak take on a big, valid topic. And it’s so depressing to see the NYT onboard with “lived experience” as acceptable language in an allegedly research-driven article.

- Gen Xer

[Anonymous]

In all honesty nowadays women have social media and have access to videos like this:

Whatever facade was able to exist before about marriage, where it was this beautiful, super romantic thing, has gone out the window as moms/wives share the realities of their daily life. Women are seeing that marriage is more akin to being in some kind of labor camp rather than what the movies/fairy tales have told us. Go hang out on that reddit forum, BreakingMom, for five minutes and tell me marriage seems attractive to you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In all honesty nowadays women have social media and have access to videos like this:

Whatever facade was able to exist before about marriage, where it was this beautiful, super romantic thing, has gone out the window as moms/wives share the realities of their daily life. Women are seeing that marriage is more akin to being in some kind of labor camp rather than what the movies/fairy tales have told us. Go hang out on that reddit forum, BreakingMom, for five minutes and tell me marriage seems attractive to you.

Great! Casual sex, and no economic ties or long term relationship baggage! A marriage free world sounds pretty sweet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In all honesty nowadays women have social media and have access to videos like this:

Whatever facade was able to exist before about marriage, where it was this beautiful, super romantic thing, has gone out the window as moms/wives share the realities of their daily life. Women are seeing that marriage is more akin to being in some kind of labor camp rather than what the movies/fairy tales have told us. Go hang out on that reddit forum, BreakingMom, for five minutes and tell me marriage seems attractive to you.

Great! Casual sex, and no economic ties or long term relationship baggage! A marriage free world sounds pretty sweet.

That's already happening with the younger crowd. But warning, my dear boomer: it's not the "free sex for all men!!!" utopia you were fantasizing about. More like a very small percentage of young men are having the vast majority of sex, and more men are virgins than ever before. And not many men are reproducing. But yeah, no economic ties or baggage, and women are happier at least even if more young men are lonely than ever before.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Many women, myself included, do not want to be married. There are many reasons. 1. I can take care of myself. 2. I do not want to take care of a man (or a woman). 3. I don't want children in this world we live in. 4. GET OVER IT!

You do you and I sincerely wish you well.
I am also pretty happy that women who think like you are not procreating because it gives me hope that those of us who do will be able to raise a generation of children who place a higher value on marriage and family again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This article is a weak take on a big, valid topic. And it’s so depressing to see the NYT onboard with “lived experience” as acceptable language in an allegedly research-driven article.

- Gen Xer

I don’t mind “lived experience“ references so long as it’s backed by statistics

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In all honesty nowadays women have social media and have access to videos like this:

Whatever facade was able to exist before about marriage, where it was this beautiful, super romantic thing, has gone out the window as moms/wives share the realities of their daily life. Women are seeing that marriage is more akin to being in some kind of labor camp rather than what the movies/fairy tales have told us. Go hang out on that reddit forum, BreakingMom, for five minutes and tell me marriage seems attractive to you.

Great! Casual sex, and no economic ties or long term relationship baggage! A marriage free world sounds pretty sweet.

That's already happening with the younger crowd. But warning, my dear boomer: it's not the "free sex for all men!!!" utopia you were fantasizing about. More like a very small percentage of young men are having the vast majority of sex, and more men are virgins than ever before. And not many men are reproducing. But yeah, no economic ties or baggage, and women are happier at least even if more young men are lonely than ever before.

I'm one of the younger men having the vast majority of sex.

Most people seem to need more sex than they get.

If you want to be happier in your relationship, have more sex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I reject the premise that getting married is some optimal goal/outcome.

Agreed. I’m in my 40s and know far more people getting divorced or already divorced, than happy couples. And the divorced women are HAPPY! Truly living their best lives after getting rid of dead weight. For them, marriage wasn’t everything it was cracked up to be.

I think this OP was started by a young married woman in her 20s that’s trying to justify her life choice. OP you need to realize that many single women and men are happy just the way they are, and lead very satisfying lives and don’t want to be married. I know you can’t stand to hear that, but it’s the truth. Accept it and move on.

Every divorced man I meet and bang is overjoyed to be free of his nagging, spendthrift shrew. So, yeah.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In all honesty nowadays women have social media and have access to videos like this:

Whatever facade was able to exist before about marriage, where it was this beautiful, super romantic thing, has gone out the window as moms/wives share the realities of their daily life. Women are seeing that marriage is more akin to being in some kind of labor camp rather than what the movies/fairy tales have told us. Go hang out on that reddit forum, BreakingMom, for five minutes and tell me marriage seems attractive to you.

Great! Casual sex, and no economic ties or long term relationship baggage! A marriage free world sounds pretty sweet.

That's already happening with the younger crowd. But warning, my dear boomer: it's not the "free sex for all men!!!" utopia you were fantasizing about. More like a very small percentage of young men are having the vast majority of sex, and more men are virgins than ever before. And not many men are reproducing. But yeah, no economic ties or baggage, and women are happier at least even if more young men are lonely than ever before.

I'm one of the younger men having the vast majority of sex.

Most people seem to need more sex than they get.

If you want to be happier in your relationship, have more sex.

Good for you! You must be attractive/tall.

See, it's just survival of the fittest. Now that we dont have the pressure for marriage forcing women to pair up with dumpy looking, fat, or ugly men, they will go after the men they REALLY want. And within a generation youre going to see kids become taller/more attractive as nature is allowed to take its course. Love it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I reject the premise that getting married is some optimal goal/outcome.

Agreed. I’m in my 40s and know far more people getting divorced or already divorced, than happy couples. And the divorced women are HAPPY! Truly living their best lives after getting rid of dead weight. For them, marriage wasn’t everything it was cracked up to be.

I think this OP was started by a young married woman in her 20s that’s trying to justify her life choice. OP you need to realize that many single women and men are happy just the way they are, and lead very satisfying lives and don’t want to be married. I know you can’t stand to hear that, but it’s the truth. Accept it and move on.

Every divorced man I meet and bang is overjoyed to be free of his nagging, spendthrift shrew. So, yeah.

Considering those men must have been gay to be banging you, I'm sure they are.