Why Aren’t More People Getting Married? Ask Women What Dating Is Like.

[Anonymous]

Now that we dont have the pressure for marriage forcing women to pair up with dumpy looking, fat, or ugly men, they will go after the men they REALLY want.

Riight, there are plenty of wealthy tall men to go around.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Many women, myself included, do not want to be married. There are many reasons. 1. I can take care of myself. 2. I do not want to take care of a man (or a woman). 3. I don't want children in this world we live in. 4. GET OVER IT!

I don't understand your reasons. I have been married for 25+ years and 1) I can take care of myself (and always did so). 2. I do not want to take care of a man (I've never done, we always had domestic help, including live in maid). 3. I live in a wonderful world and gave life to 5 amazing people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Now that we dont have the pressure for marriage forcing women to pair up with dumpy looking, fat, or ugly men, they will go after the men they REALLY want.

Riight, there are plenty of wealthy tall men to go around.

I dont think most women care as much about wealth. Mostly it's about innate looks. And yeah, some women are gonna be sleeping with the same men- I honestly think women would prefer to sleep with a gorgeous, sexy guy and have him be getting action on the side than sleep with an ugly dumpy man. Sad fact that really showcases the difference between men and women... most men just want almost any woman they can get- being with almost any woman is better than being alone. For women it's the opposite. Women are much pickier about who they find attractive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can't find the source anymore, but I read an interesting article about how, historically, a good percentage of the population did not marry. They joined religious orders, joined the army, became educators, moved in with family to help out ... we have this cultural ideal that everybody pairs off, but that has never been true and, socially speaking, doesn't need to be true. Single people are a normal part of society.

Pretty much. The pressure to have everyone married is recent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Many women, myself included, do not want to be married. There are many reasons. 1. I can take care of myself. 2. I do not want to take care of a man (or a woman). 3. I don't want children in this world we live in. 4. GET OVER IT!

I don't understand your reasons. I have been married for 25+ years and 1) I can take care of myself (and always did so). 2. I do not want to take care of a man (I've never done, we always had domestic help, including live in maid). 3. I live in a wonderful world and gave life to 5 amazing people.

You have a charmed life. Most marriages are not like yours. Marriage is awful for most women. Thankfully, I am divorced.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In all honesty nowadays women have social media and have access to videos like this:

Whatever facade was able to exist before about marriage, where it was this beautiful, super romantic thing, has gone out the window as moms/wives share the realities of their daily life. Women are seeing that marriage is more akin to being in some kind of labor camp rather than what the movies/fairy tales have told us. Go hang out on that reddit forum, BreakingMom, for five minutes and tell me marriage seems attractive to you.

Great! Casual sex, and no economic ties or long term relationship baggage! A marriage free world sounds pretty sweet.

That's already happening with the younger crowd. But warning, my dear boomer: it's not the "free sex for all men!!!" utopia you were fantasizing about. More like a very small percentage of young men are having the vast majority of sex, and more men are virgins than ever before. And not many men are reproducing. But yeah, no economic ties or baggage, and women are happier at least even if more young men are lonely than ever before.

I'm one of the younger men having the vast majority of sex.

Most people seem to need more sex than they get.

If you want to be happier in your relationship, have more sex.

Good for you! You must be attractive/tall.

See, it's just survival of the fittest. Now that we dont have the pressure for marriage forcing women to pair up with dumpy looking, fat, or ugly men, they will go after the men they REALLY want. And within a generation youre going to see kids become taller/more attractive as nature is allowed to take its course. Love it.

I'm only 5'9''. I'm not knocking up the women I sleep with. Most college educated people understand birth control. Who wants all that?

Religious people will provide the future generations. I read an article about Amish / Mennonites population doubling every 15-18 years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Now that we dont have the pressure for marriage forcing women to pair up with dumpy looking, fat, or ugly men, they will go after the men they REALLY want.

Riight, there are plenty of wealthy tall men to go around.

I dont think most women care as much about wealth. Mostly it's about innate looks. And yeah, some women are gonna be sleeping with the same men- I honestly think women would prefer to sleep with a gorgeous, sexy guy and have him be getting action on the side than sleep with an ugly dumpy man. Sad fact that really showcases the difference between men and women... most men just want almost any woman they can get- being with almost any woman is better than being alone. For women it's the opposite. Women are much pickier about who they find attractive.

What? No. Plenty of women have settled for an alright looking dude because that is better than being alone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In all honesty nowadays women have social media and have access to videos like this:

Whatever facade was able to exist before about marriage, where it was this beautiful, super romantic thing, has gone out the window as moms/wives share the realities of their daily life. Women are seeing that marriage is more akin to being in some kind of labor camp rather than what the movies/fairy tales have told us. Go hang out on that reddit forum, BreakingMom, for five minutes and tell me marriage seems attractive to you.

Great! Casual sex, and no economic ties or long term relationship baggage! A marriage free world sounds pretty sweet.

That's already happening with the younger crowd. But warning, my dear boomer: it's not the "free sex for all men!!!" utopia you were fantasizing about. More like a very small percentage of young men are having the vast majority of sex, and more men are virgins than ever before. And not many men are reproducing. But yeah, no economic ties or baggage, and women are happier at least even if more young men are lonely than ever before.

I'm one of the younger men having the vast majority of sex.

Most people seem to need more sex than they get.

If you want to be happier in your relationship, have more sex.

Good for you! You must be attractive/tall.

See, it's just survival of the fittest. Now that we dont have the pressure for marriage forcing women to pair up with dumpy looking, fat, or ugly men, they will go after the men they REALLY want. And within a generation youre going to see kids become taller/more attractive as nature is allowed to take its course. Love it.

I'm only 5'9''. I'm not knocking up the women I sleep with. Most college educated people understand birth control. Who wants all that?

Religious people will provide the future generations. I read an article about Amish / Mennonites population doubling every 15-18 years.

You must have an attractive face if youre able to overcome the height deficit. Good for you.

Like I said, this is a total net positive for society. Youre gonna see the dumpies die off within a few generations and a much more "fit" population overall

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Now that we dont have the pressure for marriage forcing women to pair up with dumpy looking, fat, or ugly men, they will go after the men they REALLY want.

Riight, there are plenty of wealthy tall men to go around.

I dont think most women care as much about wealth. Mostly it's about innate looks. And yeah, some women are gonna be sleeping with the same men- I honestly think women would prefer to sleep with a gorgeous, sexy guy and have him be getting action on the side than sleep with an ugly dumpy man. Sad fact that really showcases the difference between men and women... most men just want almost any woman they can get- being with almost any woman is better than being alone. For women it's the opposite. Women are much pickier about who they find attractive.

What? No. Plenty of women have settled for an alright looking dude because that is better than being alone.

IN THE PAST. That's kinda the point of the article, lol.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A couple of points:

As a man I don't want to raise someone else's kids. (You want a good man? Don't have kids outside of marriage.)

Many women in DC are smart, that's great! But many are ~40+ and have prioritized their careers over family for most of their lives. I don't care about the status-level of my partner's job. I don't care how much money my partner makes. I do care if someone will be a good partner and can give me time and togetherness. (The DC area dating apps are filled with attractive, single, smart, 40 year old female attorneys.)

Women who are fat aren't attractive. (Most women who are online dating are obese. You want a good man? Have good hygiene, go to the gym regularly and diet.)

Women who are old aren't attractive. (You want a man? Lock one down before you turn 35-40. After 45 most women are invisible to men and you'll be stuck dating 60 year old men.)

Most people (men or women) who are still dating and never married by their late 30s-40s aren't partner material. (Emotional, psychological, sexual, commitment issues...)

Are looks important to men? Yes! And sex and a real emotional connection.

One easy fact about dating: if you want to find someone who will commit to you, date someone who is less attractive than you are. If you are a 6, date a 4 or 5.

Either you are in your late 30s-40s and aren't partner material by your own admission or you are too young to know what you are talking about. In any case, your only meaningful contribution to this thread is some eyerolls.

I'm a woman who's been married for 10 years (and an attorney to boot!) and I agree with all of that that PP said. Harsh but true.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I reject the premise that getting married is some optimal goal/outcome.

Agreed. I’m in my 40s and know far more people getting divorced or already divorced, than happy couples. And the divorced women are HAPPY! Truly living their best lives after getting rid of dead weight. For them, marriage wasn’t everything it was cracked up to be.

I think this OP was started by a young married woman in her 20s that’s trying to justify her life choice. OP you need to realize that many single women and men are happy just the way they are, and lead very satisfying lives and don’t want to be married. I know you can’t stand to hear that, but it’s the truth. Accept it and move on.

Every divorced man I meet and bang is overjoyed to be free of his nagging, spendthrift shrew. So, yeah.

Considering those men must have been gay to be banging you, I'm sure they are.

Hardly, love. They’re all just straight and super horny because their kunty wives view sex as a chore to be performed to gain access to the high-limit visa so they can go buy Birkins and whatnot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I reject the premise that getting married is some optimal goal/outcome.

Agreed. I’m in my 40s and know far more people getting divorced or already divorced, than happy couples. And the divorced women are HAPPY! Truly living their best lives after getting rid of dead weight. For them, marriage wasn’t everything it was cracked up to be.

I think this OP was started by a young married woman in her 20s that’s trying to justify her life choice. OP you need to realize that many single women and men are happy just the way they are, and lead very satisfying lives and don’t want to be married. I know you can’t stand to hear that, but it’s the truth. Accept it and move on.

Every divorced man I meet and bang is overjoyed to be free of his nagging, spendthrift shrew. So, yeah.

Considering those men must have been gay to be banging you, I'm sure they are.

Hardly, love. They’re all just straight and super horny because their kunty wives view sex as a chore to be performed to gain access to the high-limit visa so they can go buy Birkins and whatnot.

Sure they were. Because you totally talk and sound just like a woman, Bob. No one believes youre a man larping on an anonymous forum.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Many women, myself included, do not want to be married. There are many reasons. 1. I can take care of myself. 2. I do not want to take care of a man (or a woman). 3. I don't want children in this world we live in. 4. GET OVER IT!

5. No one asked me to.

Actually 4 men have asked me to marry them, Beta Boy.

Larry, Curly, Moe, and Shemp?

[Anonymous]

Single 41. Never married and want to. I just happened to land on a 34 year old who is financially generous, very handsome but too short for the dating game apparently( he is 5’5 and i’m 5’7). He is for sure self conscious about it but I have no provlems. What he lacks in height he makes up for it in ambition, kindness, and consistency. Unfortunately he does not want to marry me so we don’t have the discussion and I just carry on with our friendship and financial perks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I never had a problem meeting nice guys. I think early on I had very ambitious goals so that was my problem. When I decided to lighten up I was lucky enough to find a guy who exceeded my goals especially as it related to being a sweetheart.

Yes if you were very career oriented that's probably going to mean you were filtering out men who want to marry someone who is at least open to the idea of having multiple kids and being a SAHM for at least a few years. I work with someone now whose wife makes 2x what he does. They just had a kid and looking to have more and she really wants to quit and be a sahm but they just bought a new house so it's a dilemma. Now she is very good at what she does, but with a lot of women it's like a switch is flipped when they become mom's and their priorities change.