Any all-boy moms wistful about not having a daughter?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Also, I'm pretty sure there are boys who wanted to go to Taylor Swift and plenty of girls who didn't.

I was just going to say this. I’ve seen Taylor Swift twice with one of my boys.

[Anonymous]

I like having sons now, but hope that my future daughters in law will let me have a relationship with my kids when they are adults.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What makes me sad is the matrilineal bond is so much stronger. Boys do what the wife's family wants, often, leaving the boy-grandmother out in the cold.

I don't think this has to do with a "bond". I think it's because (many) women plan and do the work necessary to see their families; (many) men do not. Paternal grandmothers sometimes want to take this out on the wife, but it's likely due to the way they raised their son.

I think this is exactly it. My husband is an equal as a father and partner in the household in every way, but I see this in our relationships with our parents - I do more of the planning, make more of an effort, and frankly care more. My MIL had terminal cancer last year and the difference between how my husband stepped up vs his sisters, when he otherwise doesn't do that typical "men don't do reproductive labor" crap (in the sociological sense, not thr literal childbearing sense) was noteworthy and sad to me. And yes, of course i offered to pick up the slack at home or take time off myself to help.

I don't know exactly where this comes from and how to raise sons differently, because I don't know if it's all based on what happens within a household vs broader social influence. But yeah, when I am dying i would rather my sons would inconvenience themselves the way my sister in laws did.

[Anonymous]

Yes, I think most feel this way and also most eventually make peace with it

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Friends are going with their tweens to Taylor Swift, making bracelets, etc. Such a bonding experience. It just hit me that I won't have that. I mean, I love my boys, but ... they like baseball, and I love their games and watch them, but it's not the same exactly, and sometimes I feel wistful!!

I knew this thread would turn into "why girls suck" and so glad I am a boy mom. Why can't you be happy with what you have without tearing down girls? If your boys marry girls is this how you are going to treat them? Do you forget you are women too? Or is the misogyny so ingrained?

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nope, because there’s no chance my sons will come home pregnant, and if either one impregnates a woman at a young age, the financial & logistical burden on me will be much lower than if it was a daughter of mine pregnant.

Very weird reason

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I cried when I found out I was having a boy (thanks for making me believe boys suck, radical feminism!), but he's awesome.

Yikes…weird mental gymnastics there!

[Anonymous]

Yes. Thank goodness I have a niece who lives nearby and has very busy parents who are happy for me to take off their hands.

[Anonymous]

No, I wanted boys. I didn’t have a close relationship with my mom as a kid and I don’t now. I find relationships with men to be much easier than women - no gossip, they take you how you are, no comparisons. I’m not close with my MIL, as she always bring drama. I just don’t have these issues with men.

[Anonymous]

I have an 11yo DD who has no interest in Taylor Swift or bracelet making. She probably never will. She plays soccer and swims and I’m ok with that. You could have a girl OP and they would be nothing like your envision. Be happy you have heathy kids and just enjoy them.

[Anonymous]

Not at all. I have boys and wanted a daughter at first. Once I had a boy, I only wanted boys. Someone knew what they were doing with me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No, I wanted boys. I didn’t have a close relationship with my mom as a kid and I don’t now. I find relationships with men to be much easier than women - no gossip, they take you how you are, no comparisons. I’m not close with my MIL, as she always bring drama. I just don’t have these issues with men.

100% this

[Anonymous]

Totally normal OP. I had a girl after two boys and was very relieved and excited. There is nothing wrong with feeling the way you do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nope, because there’s no chance my sons will come home pregnant, and if either one impregnates a woman at a young age, the financial & logistical burden on me will be much lower than if it was a daughter of mine pregnant.

Ew

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Friends are going with their tweens to Taylor Swift, making bracelets, etc. Such a bonding experience. It just hit me that I won't have that. I mean, I love my boys, but ... they like baseball, and I love their games and watch them, but it's not the same exactly, and sometimes I feel wistful!!

I knew this thread would turn into "why girls suck" and so glad I am a boy mom. Why can't you be happy with what you have without tearing down girls? If your boys marry girls is this how you are going to treat them? Do you forget you are women too? Or is the misogyny so ingrained?

+1

Every.single.time. It’s so sad.