Reply to Any all-boy moms wistful about not having a daughter?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What makes me sad is the matrilineal bond is so much stronger. Boys do what the wife's family wants, often, leaving the boy-grandmother out in the cold.[/quote]

I don't think this has to do with a "bond". I think it's because (many) women plan and do the work necessary to see their families; (many) men do not. Paternal grandmothers sometimes want to take this out on the wife, but it's likely due to the way they raised their son.[/quote]

I think this is exactly it. My husband is an equal as a father and partner in the household in every way, but I see this in our relationships with our parents - I do more of the planning, make more of an effort, and frankly care more. My MIL had terminal cancer last year and the difference between how my husband stepped up vs his sisters, when he otherwise doesn't do that typical "men don't do reproductive labor" crap (in the sociological sense, not thr literal childbearing sense) was noteworthy and sad to me. And yes, of course i offered to pick up the slack at home or take time off myself to help.

I don't know exactly where this comes from and how to raise sons differently, because I don't know if it's all based on what happens within a household vs broader social influence. But yeah, when I am dying i would rather my sons would inconvenience themselves the way my sister in laws did. [/quote]

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