URMs Feeling Pressure to Prove Themselves

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The cost of Affirmative Action.

+1. URM's cannot have it both ways. It's a well known fact that females have an advantage in college admissions for STEM and URM for everything. Frankly even workplaces have DEI initiatives.

I think you forget to mention the advantage for white males in many other college settings, but particularly liberal arts colleges? Or does that upset your narrative?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was a biracial white-passing minority at an elite college in the 90s and knew immediately literally everyone in my class was far smarter and cutthroat. It was awful. And in January of my first year my advisors were trying to get me to consider the easiest majors just because I aced an easy intro class everyone aces. Not try harder and here’s some resources, they just wanted me in an easy department. Being the dumb kid sucks. EVERYONE know you only got in because of affirmative action. Not to say most peers are mean and won’t socialize with you, it’s just you can tell they know you’re not on their level.

You were both white-passing AND people assumed you got in because of affirmative action????

Your story doesn't pass the smell test...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That's terrible people say rude things. Your daughter sounds amazing. Congrats on her acceptances!

+1

I am not surprised by this given comments we see daily on this board, but please don’t let petty people undermine your child’s amazing accomplishments.

[Anonymous]

do the athletes and legacy admits feel the same way? I’d say no, and yet the dopes at the ivies are more likely athletes than URM or legacy, who have a higher admission standard than the Ivy AI. And I am the parent of one (athlete)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:do the athletes and legacy admits feel the same way? I’d say no, and yet the dopes at the ivies are more likely athletes than URM or legacy, who have a higher admission standard than the Ivy AI. And I am the parent of one (athlete)

Athletes routinely get those comments and some athletic departments and administrations give coaches leeway to bar students from certain majors that are viewed as too hard or time consuming.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was a biracial white-passing minority at an elite college in the 90s and knew immediately literally everyone in my class was far smarter and cutthroat. It was awful. And in January of my first year my advisors were trying to get me to consider the easiest majors just because I aced an easy intro class everyone aces. Not try harder and here’s some resources, they just wanted me in an easy department. Being the dumb kid sucks. EVERYONE know you only got in because of affirmative action. Not to say most peers are mean and won’t socialize with you, it’s just you can tell they know you’re not on their level.

I was like you, down to the imposter syndrome. Most of your classmates weren't smarter and cutthroat than you naturally. They were just groomed to be that way by parents who know what it takes. So many of my classmates had already taken in high school, the classes I was struggling to get Bs in.
As an older person who is well off now, I can see how the game is played. You were not on their level because you you came to a gunfight with a knife. Not your natural intellect but the preparation. So should only those who can afford private or high HHI neighborhood school go to top school?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:do the athletes and legacy admits feel the same way? I’d say no, and yet the dopes at the ivies are more likely athletes than URM or legacy, who have a higher admission standard than the Ivy AI. And I am the parent of one (athlete)

Legacies particularly aren't obvious like skin color.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That's terrible people say rude things. Your daughter sounds amazing. Congrats on her acceptances!

I sincerely doubt that anyone says what OP is claiming, and I’ve been active in both private and public high schools. No one says that

OP here. I assure you, these comments have come from parents of my kid’s peers. One, I clearly remember, was the same mom who, back when they were in Kindergarten, asked if I would “let” my kid date a Black person. I was in shock! I grew up in a liberal state, and was not ready for this kind of comment. Just a few months ago, this same mom said to me, “You know, your kid will have an easier time getting into XX University, because you are Hispanic”. Which in some cases may be true, but kid did get high grades, and deserves to be there.

I have also heard, “Well, if my kid were were Hispanic, we would totally use that to our advantage”

well, yea. Your kid put their race on the application; it was to their advantage.

No one is saying your kid didn't work hard, but unfortunately, this is the problem with using "holistic admissions" as a form of affirmative action.

Would you support policies that purely look at stats and not "holistic" demographics?

NP
If it is purely stats MIT could end up accepting only from very few top magnet technology high schools.
I don’t think this will create a well rounded class room.

hence OP's post. We've now come full circle.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was a biracial white-passing minority at an elite college in the 90s and knew immediately literally everyone in my class was far smarter and cutthroat. It was awful. And in January of my first year my advisors were trying to get me to consider the easiest majors just because I aced an easy intro class everyone aces. Not try harder and here’s some resources, they just wanted me in an easy department. Being the dumb kid sucks. EVERYONE know you only got in because of affirmative action. Not to say most peers are mean and won’t socialize with you, it’s just you can tell they know you’re not on their level.

I was like you, down to the imposter syndrome. Most of your classmates weren't smarter and cutthroat than you naturally. They were just groomed to be that way by parents who know what it takes. So many of my classmates had already taken in high school, the classes I was struggling to get Bs in.
As an older person who is well off now, I can see how the game is played. You were not on their level because you you came to a gunfight with a knife. Not your natural intellect but the preparation. So should only those who can afford private or high HHI neighborhood school go to top school?

Plug in the T10 of your choice https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2017/01/18/upshot/some-colleges-have-more-students-from-the-top-1-percent-than-the-bottom-60.html and you'll see that is largely the case.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was a biracial white-passing minority at an elite college in the 90s and knew immediately literally everyone in my class was far smarter and cutthroat. It was awful. And in January of my first year my advisors were trying to get me to consider the easiest majors just because I aced an easy intro class everyone aces. Not try harder and here’s some resources, they just wanted me in an easy department. Being the dumb kid sucks. EVERYONE know you only got in because of affirmative action. Not to say most peers are mean and won’t socialize with you, it’s just you can tell they know you’re not on their level.

At least you are honest about it. Most are not.

+1

I also think that is how HBCUs came to be. Why do HBCUs seem to be falling out of favor?

[Anonymous]

This is what people such as the Most Honorable Justice Thomas has had to face among racists. And get this. There was no affirmative action when the Most Honorable Justice Thomas applied to college.

The cost of affirmative action.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was a biracial white-passing minority at an elite college in the 90s and knew immediately literally everyone in my class was far smarter and cutthroat. It was awful. And in January of my first year my advisors were trying to get me to consider the easiest majors just because I aced an easy intro class everyone aces. Not try harder and here’s some resources, they just wanted me in an easy department. Being the dumb kid sucks. EVERYONE know you only got in because of affirmative action. Not to say most peers are mean and won’t socialize with you, it’s just you can tell they know you’re not on their level.

At least you are honest about it. Most are not.

+1

I also think that is how HBCUs came to be. Why do HBCUs seem to be falling out of favor?

Most HBCUs where created when state flagships wouldn't accept black students. Now that there are better and often cheaper options, they aren't as popular.

[Anonymous]

Welcome to the ugly side of living in a highly educated “liberal” community. The hypocrisy in these comments is truly astounding.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That's terrible people say rude things. Your daughter sounds amazing. Congrats on her acceptances!

I sincerely doubt that anyone says what OP is claiming, and I’ve been active in both private and public high schools. No one says that

Sure they say that. Maybe not as much to their face. Kid in my high school got accepted to an Ivy, was ranked somewhere around 5 in the class. No one else in the class attended an Ivy or anything close.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That's terrible people say rude things. Your daughter sounds amazing. Congrats on her acceptances!

I sincerely doubt that anyone says what OP is claiming, and I’ve been active in both private and public high schools. No one says that

Sure they say that. Maybe not as much to their face. Kid in my high school got accepted to an Ivy, was ranked somewhere around 5 in the class. No one else in the class attended an Ivy or anything close.

When my daughter was applying to colleges we used to go over the Naviance graphs. The one ivy acceptance (Yale) in my kids school in the previous 3-4 years was from a kid of African immigrants. Had excellent grades (very close to a 4.0 UW) but a 1090 on the SAT (before TO). All of the other kids with a 4.0 and 1500+ SAT scores were rejected.