Help me write text to volatile siblings

[Anonymous]

You do sound like a bit of a nut, OP. Just tell them you don't want them to visit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PP here. I mean, let’s be clear. The issue isn’t that your kid will get COVID from their unvaxed kid and it will be rough. The issue is that you cannot trust these folks to test or tell you the truth about either symptoms or testing. So there you are.

OP again. It’s both that I can’t trust them and that I’ve learned things about them through covid that make me not like them, honestly. They aren’t vaccinated, but when they got covid they of course went to the hospital (which I’m glad about), spent weeks in the hospital, complaining the whole time about their care. They have lied. They have ridiculed me for being a sheep. They have hosted an intervention with my parents, who are in their 80s, to convince my parents to be around them even when they are unvaccinated back when we thought being vaccinated could stop transmission. They are so selfish. I felt like my family had accomplished a slow fade from them, and now it looks like we’re going to have to have a dramatic break up. Or suck it up and have a once per year or so visit, with whatever risk that entails.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:PP here. I mean, let’s be clear. The issue isn’t that your kid will get COVID from their unvaxed kid and it will be rough. The issue is that you cannot trust these folks to test or tell you the truth about either symptoms or testing. So there you are.

OP again. It’s both that I can’t trust them and that I’ve learned things about them through covid that make me not like them, honestly. They aren’t vaccinated, but when they got covid they of course went to the hospital (which I’m glad about), spent weeks in the hospital, complaining the whole time about their care. They have lied. They have ridiculed me for being a sheep. They have hosted an intervention with my parents, who are in their 80s, to convince my parents to be around them even when they are unvaccinated back when we thought being vaccinated could stop transmission. They are so selfish. I felt like my family had accomplished a slow fade from them, and now it looks like we’re going to have to have a dramatic break up. Or suck it up and have a once per year or so visit, with whatever risk that entails.

You are the problem and create drama when it's not there. Vaccines help with your symptoms not transmission. Many of the kids your kids go to school with aren't vaccinated. Grow up. If you don't want to see them say so but don't pretend its covid related when you aren't careful at all. You are selfish.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:PP here. I mean, let’s be clear. The issue isn’t that your kid will get COVID from their unvaxed kid and it will be rough. The issue is that you cannot trust these folks to test or tell you the truth about either symptoms or testing. So there you are.

OP again. It’s both that I can’t trust them and that I’ve learned things about them through covid that make me not like them, honestly. They aren’t vaccinated, but when they got covid they of course went to the hospital (which I’m glad about), spent weeks in the hospital, complaining the whole time about their care. They have lied. They have ridiculed me for being a sheep. They have hosted an intervention with my parents, who are in their 80s, to convince my parents to be around them even when they are unvaccinated back when we thought being vaccinated could stop transmission. They are so selfish. I felt like my family had accomplished a slow fade from them, and now it looks like we’re going to have to have a dramatic break up. Or suck it up and have a once per year or so visit, with whatever risk that entails.

OMG just tell them you can't stand them and never want to see them again and stop pretending it's about "science" and vaccines.

[Anonymous]

This is OP. The extent to which it’s about vaccines is that I’ve never really enjoyed visits with them, but it used to be just an obligation we did from time to time because they are family. Now it’s an obligation that carries some risk of all of us getting covid and me getting seriously ill. Maybe vaccination status doesn’t matter. I don’t take that risk for ANYONE. We haven’t been around anyone outside our household without masks on since the beginning of the pandemic, unless we are outside.

Vaccination status just matters, I guess, because like PPs have said, I don’t trust them. I don’t trust them to tell the truth and I don’t trust them to do their best to protect my health.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:PP here. I mean, let’s be clear. The issue isn’t that your kid will get COVID from their unvaxed kid and it will be rough. The issue is that you cannot trust these folks to test or tell you the truth about either symptoms or testing. So there you are.

OP again. It’s both that I can’t trust them and that I’ve learned things about them through covid that make me not like them, honestly. They aren’t vaccinated, but when they got covid they of course went to the hospital (which I’m glad about), spent weeks in the hospital, complaining the whole time about their care. They have lied. They have ridiculed me for being a sheep. They have hosted an intervention with my parents, who are in their 80s, to convince my parents to be around them even when they are unvaccinated back when we thought being vaccinated could stop transmission. They are so selfish. I felt like my family had accomplished a slow fade from them, and now it looks like we’re going to have to have a dramatic break up. Or suck it up and have a once per year or so visit, with whatever risk that entails.

You are the problem and create drama when it's not there. Vaccines help with your symptoms not transmission. Many of the kids your kids go to school with aren't vaccinated. Grow up. If you don't want to see them say so but don't pretend its covid related when you aren't careful at all. You are selfish.

Ignore this poster. You aren’t selfish OP. The selfish ones are your relatives if they don’t understand why you aren’t willing to meet them indoors. It’s about limiting your risk. There’s no need to enter into a situation with people who you know don’t take their own health and that of others, including yours, seriously.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is OP. The extent to which it’s about vaccines is that I’ve never really enjoyed visits with them, but it used to be just an obligation we did from time to time because they are family. Now it’s an obligation that carries some risk of all of us getting covid and me getting seriously ill. Maybe vaccination status doesn’t matter. I don’t take that risk for ANYONE. We haven’t been around anyone outside our household without masks on since the beginning of the pandemic, unless we are outside.

Vaccination status just matters, I guess, because like PPs have said, I don’t trust them. I don’t trust them to tell the truth and I don’t trust them to do their best to protect my health.

You're just looking for something to use to avoid visiting them. Your kids are in school and daycare. You are not super duper cautious and safe. Just stop.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is OP. The extent to which it’s about vaccines is that I’ve never really enjoyed visits with them, but it used to be just an obligation we did from time to time because they are family. Now it’s an obligation that carries some risk of all of us getting covid and me getting seriously ill. Maybe vaccination status doesn’t matter. I don’t take that risk for ANYONE. We haven’t been around anyone outside our household without masks on since the beginning of the pandemic, unless we are outside.

Vaccination status just matters, I guess, because like PPs have said, I don’t trust them. I don’t trust them to tell the truth and I don’t trust them to do their best to protect my health.

If you don't like them, don't see them, but drop the Covid sanctimony.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is OP. The extent to which it’s about vaccines is that I’ve never really enjoyed visits with them, but it used to be just an obligation we did from time to time because they are family. Now it’s an obligation that carries some risk of all of us getting covid and me getting seriously ill. Maybe vaccination status doesn’t matter. I don’t take that risk for ANYONE. We haven’t been around anyone outside our household without masks on since the beginning of the pandemic, unless we are outside.

Vaccination status just matters, I guess, because like PPs have said, I don’t trust them. I don’t trust them to tell the truth and I don’t trust them to do their best to protect my health.

This is beyond nuts! We are at the end of 2022 and you are still acting like this is June 2020? Have you stopped driving too? I mean why stopped acting insane for just COVID risk, why don’t you stay home for the rest of your life and take no risk whatsoever.

Your poor, poor kids. Haven’t you read of all the social emotional damage isolation did for kids and teenagers? There are lasting effects on mental health and education attainment for those who extended virtual learning. I am taking a wild guess that you also fought against kids going back to in person school. You are just as bad as all the Q-anon anti-vax.

[Anonymous]

How about a Xanax and a N95 mask? Problem solved.

[Anonymous]

From your own description, it sounds like your reluctance to see them has more to do with your disdain for their position about covid & vaccines than it does with fear of catching COVID from them.

Vaccination does NOT prevent transmission.

And since they had COVID, they have immunological protection, which several studies have shown to offer superior protection to vaccination. If you understand how vaccines work, this should be clear. So please stop with the "they aren't vaccinated."

Please think hard about what the real issue is. If you don't want to see them, tell them you're busy and can't. I don't see any way this visit would go well knowing how you feel about them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So the extent of your cautiousness is just not seeing your siblings? Mkay. You sound nuts. But go on and send the text so your siblings will know how crazy you have become.

I’m sorry but this feels kinda true to me. Illnesses are everywhere. RSV, flu, covid, norovirus, strep, rhinovirus, etc……

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Please stop using words like “momming.”

Stop with the “Is that going to work for you?” It’s mealy-mouthed. I’m not sure why you’re trying to manage people you say don’t care about you.

WTF does mealy-mouthed mean?

It's old people speak.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm sorry you've been put in this position. I guess my only counter would be that if you are eating inside, shopping in person, traveling at all, etc, you are probably sharing air with unvaccinated people every day.

So then you have to decide if you want to lay down the law this time, with these people - which makes it start seeming personal instead of a general rule.

But maybe you're not doing any of those things and you really do have a rule about not being indoors with anyone whose vax status isn't determined.

Would you be ok if they test right before they see you? Or at your house? Is this about setting emotional boundaries as much as health related ones?

A) I definitely don’t eat inside or travel! And I rarely go into stores.
B) It’s also about emotional boundaries. I know I’m going to catch covid. I have kids in school. But I care about WHERE I catch covid. I want to catch it from one of my kids. Not from a sibling who doesn’t give a $&@“ about my health.

And no, they won’t test before they come. Because we’re all sheep and microchips and blah blah blah.

You are also as irrational as your siblings, as they are at the far end of spectrum of carelessness, you are at the other extreme. Mathematically speaking there is more of a probability that you won’t get COVID from your siblings you are seeing once versus your daily exposure to your personal, husband and children’s activities. I can tell you also dont give a $#it about your siblings either, who are making an effort to continue to be part of your children. You are willing to damage the relationship to virtue signal how COVID conscious you are versus all the ´estoopid unvaxxed’

I like you have all shots and have follow all masks procedures, as my children, but understand some members of my family have a different point of view, their closeness means more to me than a 0.x chance to catch COVID.

Some people like you thrive on feeling special when so many people with actual immunocompromised illnesses continue to live life without subjugating others around them. I feel really sorry for your children,

Thanks for letting us know you don't know what "subjugating" means.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, for a very long time, I was one of the most COVID-cautious and COVID-anxious people I know. And honestly, it’s crazy to me that your kids are in *daycare and school* and you are acting like that’s OK and acceptable risk, but seeing family is not. Come on. That makes absolutely no logical sense. You’re telling me your kid could very well be sitting next to an unvaccinated kid all day at school, and somehow that’s different than if they were sitting next to an unvaccinated cousin building a Lego set?

FWIW, my kids go to preschool and private school, and everyone has to be vaccinated at both.

…and must the people the other kids live with also be vaccinated?

“ Some fully vaccinated people will still get COVID-19 if they are exposed to the virus that causes COVID-19. These are called vaccine breakthrough infections.”

https://www.mayoclinic.org/coronavirus-covid-19/fully-vaccinated

It’s fine not to see these people or to not offer to host these people, but you really don’t have a health-related leg to stand on if your kids are in daycare/school. Do you and/or DH work? Do you go grocery shopping? Are you dining indoors?

DH and I work from home. We get groceries delivered, and only dine at places that have outdoor seating. We are REALLY careful. And I got Covid in July and nearly had to call 911, and I am certain had I not been vaccinated and boosted I'd have wound up in the hospital. I agree OP is ridiculous to care WHO she gets Covid from. She should just get as boosted as possible, and wear a mask any time inside a public space.

"Dining" at restaurants unmasked, including outdoors, is not "REALLY careful." Omicron is not Alpha and the old "outdoors is safe" rules don't apply. No wonder you got COVID.