Youngest cousin wants no-kids wedding

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Then decline.

This. Just don’t go. Too inconvenient.

[Anonymous]

I prefer including kids, but I also get it. If she's the youngest girl in her generation in a family with tons of grandkids, she's probably done a lot of babysitting and kid wrangling-I can understand why she would want an adult wedding.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Then don’t go. This is not hard.

I didn't go to my cousin's wedding. I would have gone by myself, except DH had a work conference, so he was gone. My parents were at the wedding and my in-laws were out of town that weekend. So I couldn't leave DCs home and wasn't comfortable leaving them with a random babysitter because my youngest was an infant. I missed the wedding, I was sad about it, but I had to decide between which made me feel worse: leaving my kids with a complete stranger or missing the wedding. At that point so many of us cousins had kids already that including kids would have really driven the costs up.

[Anonymous]

I would love this. I would have an excuse to leave the kids with DH and go have fun with my family alone.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't go - my sister had a no kids wedding although all of her 3 older siblings had kids - at a venue far from where there was any lodging so she hired a sitter to watch the kids at the venue - who proceeded to call and have parents come up and get their kids if the kids fussed so my husband and I spent most of the wedding outside looking in the windows with the kids - her choice, and it wasn't an option to skip a siblings wedding, but you have to evaluate how the people you want most to attend and celebrate with you will do so with the choices you are making. I also had a no kids wedding and set up babysitters in the hotel for couples with kids but in the end regretted it because everyone was running up and down to the rooms to check on kids, spouses up there etc.. If alot of people are coming from out of town - it really changes the no kids element. If everyone is local i see no reason why you can't get a trusted babysitter to sit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's so frustrating. Literally everyone has kids. All the cousins except this one. All of us had inclusive weddings. She also has given 0 help for everyone coming from out of town to find sitters. I enjoy my kids and frankly find it hard to leave them in a hotel room for multiple hours.

I had cousins like this. Family weddings on that side have always had kids but the younger generation doesn't seem to want that. We just didn't go. Period.

[Anonymous]

If you want to have a family reunion, host it yourself. This is their wedding and it's not about you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I loved having kids at my wedding! They are so stinking cute and usually bring out some funny moments.

Everyone has a right to the wedding they want. If you can't spend a few hours without your kids, this isn't the wedding for you. Just send a gift and stay home.

Some people are coming from out of town. They would be traveling with kids, and the expense of that, only to be sticking them with a babysitter they don't know and running up/down to check on them. Not fun.

It's not about not being able to spend a few hours without them, Miss/Mr. Judgmental. Everyone likes a break from their kids. And yes, I did decline these weddings when mine were little.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So go the wedding alone and leave your kids at home with your spouse, if you have one.

Since she is the youngest, there are obviously more family kids than there were when you were married.

OP enjoys her kids too much to leave them in the hotel for a few hours, so I’m sure traveling withou them would be too much of a hardship…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I loved having kids at my wedding! They are so stinking cute and usually bring out some funny moments.

Everyone has a right to the wedding they want. If you can't spend a few hours without your kids, this isn't the wedding for you. Just send a gift and stay home.

Some people are coming from out of town. They would be traveling with kids, and the expense of that, only to be sticking them with a babysitter they don't know and running up/down to check on them. Not fun.

It's not about not being able to spend a few hours without them, Miss/Mr. Judgmental. Everyone likes a break from their kids. And yes, I did decline these weddings when mine were little.

The OP specifically mentioned not enjoying time away from her kids. That's what the PP you quoted was referencing, so yes, it WAS about not being able to spend a few hours without them, in the context of the OP.

[Anonymous]

Her wedding her choice. We asked local friends to leave their kids home but thought it was fine for people who travelled to bring their kids. Our wedding location was a decent drive from the hotel and there was no space to hire a few sitters to watch kids at the site. We thought it was a reasonable compromise because our local friends had known babysitters and the like but it would have been harder to set something up for out of town guests. Most of the cousins came without their kids so the only kids were my siblings, who we wanted to bring their kids.

It was about saving space for more friends and our friends with kids who lived near by understood that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I loved having kids at my wedding! They are so stinking cute and usually bring out some funny moments.

Everyone has a right to the wedding they want. If you can't spend a few hours without your kids, this isn't the wedding for you. Just send a gift and stay home.

Some people are coming from out of town. They would be traveling with kids, and the expense of that, only to be sticking them with a babysitter they don't know and running up/down to check on them. Not fun.

It's not about not being able to spend a few hours without them, Miss/Mr. Judgmental. Everyone likes a break from their kids. And yes, I did decline these weddings when mine were little.

DP. <tee-hee> the IRONY!

[Anonymous]

Totally fine for her to make that call but I probably wouldn't go. My kids are really young and I wouldn't want the hassle of travelling with them only to follow up with the hassle of finding a baby sitter for them in a strange place. But I don't think I've even been invited to most of my cousins' wedding, since they're on the West Coast and I couldn't have afforded to fly out anyway.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would love this. I would have an excuse to leave the kids with DH and go have fun with my family alone.

Exactly. Plus it's so much cheaper because you can share a hotel room with your favorite cousin who is ALSO ditching their entire family to go to the wedding.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I loved having kids at my wedding! They are so stinking cute and usually bring out some funny moments.

Everyone has a right to the wedding they want. If you can't spend a few hours without your kids, this isn't the wedding for you. Just send a gift and stay home.

Some people are coming from out of town. They would be traveling with kids, and the expense of that, only to be sticking them with a babysitter they don't know and running up/down to check on them. Not fun.

It's not about not being able to spend a few hours without them, Miss/Mr. Judgmental. Everyone likes a break from their kids. And yes, I did decline these weddings when mine were little.

Don't travel with the children. Leave the kids at home, with your DH. Go solo. Honestly, this sort of sounds like heaven.