Wife wants a house cleaner instead of preschool

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What kind of weird budget do you have that *only* housecleaning can be sacrificed to pay for preschool? Why don’t you start bringing your lunch to work instead of buying, for example, and move housecleaning to biweekly?

Maybe they are saving for a house? Some people have the money, but they want to save it.

Fine, but they only seem to be “saving” on items that the wife cares about. Maybe DH needs some skin in the game and some of his preferences can be up for negotiation, seeing as he is also the beneficiary of both housekeeping and preschool…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My wife isn't cool with getting rid of weekly house cleaning so we can pay for preschool. She has a part-time job on the weekends as a concierge. She's been a stay-at-home mom since our oldest was born. I am on board with her working or not working. Our first child was invited to public preschool because he was in an early intervention program. The second child's preschool won't be free. He goes to the YMCA at least four times a week for two hours a day, and they swim for another hour. My wife thinks gym childcare can provide a preschool experience.

I am so confused. Does your wife work as a concierge or is she a SAHM?

How old is kid number two?

I assume you'd clean the house if you stopped the house cleaner, is that correct?

She works on the weekend.

A SAHM is one who doesn't work for pay. It has nothing to do with what days of the week she works.

If she's doing things with your kid, such as taking them to the pool, and your kid is interacting with the other kids, then preschool is a luxury for mom, not something that the kid benefits from or is hurt by. She should get to choose the luxury she wants. I'd totally pick homeschooling over cleaning in that circumstance.

I bet anything this guy doesn't do any housework while she's working all weekend. She probably cooks all the weekend meals and comes home to dishes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What kind of weird budget do you have that *only* housecleaning can be sacrificed to pay for preschool? Why don’t you start bringing your lunch to work instead of buying, for example, and move housecleaning to biweekly?

Maybe they are saving for a house? Some people have the money, but they want to save it.

Fine, but they only seem to be “saving” on items that the wife cares about. Maybe DH needs some skin in the game and some of his preferences can be up for negotiation, seeing as he is also the beneficiary of both housekeeping and preschool…

She's saving him a divorce. Hired help saves marriages.

[Anonymous]

I’m trying to imagine only working TWO days a week and not cleaning the house. Nope. Can’t do it. Can’t imagine being that lazy.

[Anonymous]

Divorced dad here.

1. I am the maid in my home. Cleaning takes about one hour per day on average. This includes: washing dishes, doing laundry, cleaning bathrooms, changing linens, dusting, vacuuming, and maybe washing windows or some other deep cleaning occasionally. My friends who have a maid service find that a maid visit is around 2 hours once a week.

I have a nice clean house and I'm happy to have women come to my house for a date.

2. OP should quit his job, stay home, and clean the house. Rather than working 8 or more hours a day (plus commute), he will just have to work one hour per day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My wife isn't cool with getting rid of weekly house cleaning so we can pay for preschool. She has a part-time job on the weekends as a concierge. She's been a stay-at-home mom since our oldest was born. I am on board with her working or not working. Our first child was invited to public preschool because he was in an early intervention program. The second child's preschool won't be free. He goes to the YMCA at least four times a week for two hours a day, and they swim for another hour. My wife thinks gym childcare can provide a preschool experience.

I am so confused. Does your wife work as a concierge or is she a SAHM?

How old is kid number two?

I assume you'd clean the house if you stopped the house cleaner, is that correct?

She works on the weekend.

A SAHM is one who doesn't work for pay. It has nothing to do with what days of the week she works.

If she's doing things with your kid, such as taking them to the pool, and your kid is interacting with the other kids, then preschool is a luxury for mom, not something that the kid benefits from or is hurt by. She should get to choose the luxury she wants. I'd totally pick homeschooling over cleaning in that circumstance.

I bet anything this guy doesn't do any housework while she's working all weekend. She probably cooks all the weekend meals and comes home to dishes.

You'd bet anything? How about your life?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m trying to imagine only working TWO days a week and not cleaning the house. Nope. Can’t do it. Can’t imagine being that lazy.

+1

A weekly cleaner?
We do bi-weekly and that is perfectly fine. We handle the cleaning in between visits.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m trying to imagine only working TWO days a week and not cleaning the house. Nope. Can’t do it. Can’t imagine being that lazy.

Not even a full work day but part-time

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Divorced dad here.

1. I am the maid in my home. Cleaning takes about one hour per day on average. This includes: washing dishes, doing laundry, cleaning bathrooms, changing linens, dusting, vacuuming, and maybe washing windows or some other deep cleaning occasionally. My friends who have a maid service find that a maid visit is around 2 hours once a week.

I have a nice clean house and I'm happy to have women come to my house for a date.

2. OP should quit his job, stay home, and clean the house. Rather than working 8 or more hours a day (plus commute), he will just have to work one hour per day.

Do children live in your home all day? Do you prepare 3 meals a day for them? I have issues of "time blindness" so I have begun timing all my cleaning. It takes more than that, if you actually have kids in your home --

But hey, I am glad for you that your home is clean for your women guests, which is clearly your priority. No wonder!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m trying to imagine only working TWO days a week and not cleaning the house. Nope. Can’t do it. Can’t imagine being that lazy.

Not even a full work day but part-time

I can’t imagine taking care of a toddler all day, a toddler AND school aged child every evening, working every weekend and still being married to someone who thinks I’m the help.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m trying to imagine only working TWO days a week and not cleaning the house. Nope. Can’t do it. Can’t imagine being that lazy.

Not even a full work day but part-time

I can’t imagine taking care of a toddler all day, a toddler AND school aged child every evening, working every weekend and still being married to someone who thinks I’m the help.

I love how we assume that OP doesn’t help in the evenings or on the weekends.

Also she isn’t “the help”. She’s a SAHM who works part-time on the weekends to escape her kids and husband.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Divorced dad here.

1. I am the maid in my home. Cleaning takes about one hour per day on average. This includes: washing dishes, doing laundry, cleaning bathrooms, changing linens, dusting, vacuuming, and maybe washing windows or some other deep cleaning occasionally. My friends who have a maid service find that a maid visit is around 2 hours once a week.

I have a nice clean house and I'm happy to have women come to my house for a date.

2. OP should quit his job, stay home, and clean the house. Rather than working 8 or more hours a day (plus commute), he will just have to work one hour per day.

i haven't known anyone in my whole life that had a cleaning lady that only had then for 2 hours once a week.

you are delusional.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Divorced dad here.

1. I am the maid in my home. Cleaning takes about one hour per day on average. This includes: washing dishes, doing laundry, cleaning bathrooms, changing linens, dusting, vacuuming, and maybe washing windows or some other deep cleaning occasionally. My friends who have a maid service find that a maid visit is around 2 hours once a week.

I have a nice clean house and I'm happy to have women come to my house for a date.

2. OP should quit his job, stay home, and clean the house. Rather than working 8 or more hours a day (plus commute), he will just have to work one hour per day.

i haven't known anyone in my whole life that had a cleaning lady that only had then for 2 hours once a week.

you are delusional.

NP. I have a cleaning lady once a month for 3 hours for a 4,500 sf home. 2 hours once a week is not delusional.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m trying to imagine only working TWO days a week and not cleaning the house. Nope. Can’t do it. Can’t imagine being that lazy.

Not even a full work day but part-time

I can’t imagine taking care of a toddler all day, a toddler AND school aged child every evening, working every weekend and still being married to someone who thinks I’m the help.

I love how we assume that OP doesn’t help in the evenings or on the weekends.

Also she isn’t “the help”. She’s a SAHM who works part-time on the weekends to escape her kids and husband.

Sahm don’t work. She works part time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m trying to imagine only working TWO days a week and not cleaning the house. Nope. Can’t do it. Can’t imagine being that lazy.

Not even a full work day but part-time

I can’t imagine taking care of a toddler all day, a toddler AND school aged child every evening, working every weekend and still being married to someone who thinks I’m the help.

I love how we assume that OP doesn’t help in the evenings or on the weekends.

Also she isn’t “the help”. She’s a SAHM who works part-time on the weekends to escape her kids and husband.

A SAHM by definition doesn’t have a job. She is a working mother whose schedule accommodates her husbands job. Obviously she’s making some money, and she wants to use it for house cleaning, DH can pay for childcare if it’s so important to him.

The kind of man who thinks his wife should clean the house in all the spare time she’s not caring for his child (and it sounds like she’s doing meaningful activity with the kid) is not the kind of man who picks up his own socks.