DD’s team mates think DH is creepy

[Anonymous]

"basically revealing that he was paying very close attention to the eighth graders in car line."

Re-read your OP. Unsure why the talk about varsity team when you are talking about 8th grade girls that could be in middle school with your daughter. I thought he was checking out 17/18 year old girls, slimy but more understandable. Yes, him noticing 8th grade girls is very odd.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can a dad jump in here and tell us what he thinks OP’s husband is thinking when he’s watching those girls?

Hard to tell.

Someone mentioned Asperger’s syndrome. That’s possible. People suffering from Tourette’s syndrome face disdain from people who don’t understand it. And some cultures normalize staring, unlike the US, where it’s considered weird or creepy.

Then there’s the obvious possibility: he is attracted to young girls. That would be a problem.

[Anonymous]

Creepy dad is creepy.

[Anonymous]

Creepy dad should stay home.

[Anonymous]

Multiple girls have made comments about him making them feel uncomfortable. And you yourself noticed he is paying a lot of attention to 8th graders bodies and commenting on them. He may not be hurting anyone, but that is not normal and he needs to stop. There is no reason he needs to attend practice, ever and I would demand that he stop. And I would definitely not let him interact with tween/teen girls if your daughter ever has a sleepover.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Did you, or your DD, tell him what the other girls said. Time for some direct language. "You look like a creep. Stop it. One comment from on of those girls can ruin your life, your daughter's, and our family. Do not go to pick up line early. Do not go to practices. Stop it "

Also parents don't need to go to sport practices.

+100000 This!!!
Please do not go to your kids' practices. The kids AND their coaches know which parents do this and it is not a good look for your kid or family.
Let your kid live their life.

[Anonymous]

Wasn’t there a post almost exactly like this a while back, but “creepy dad” and his supposedly creepy actions were happening at home around the kid’s friends with the kids making almost identical comments as these?

[Anonymous]

I swear you or someone else has posted this situation before saying a girl wouldn’t stay at your house when your DH was there and you brushed it off as him being socially awkward. If that wasn’t you, your DH does sound creepy from what you describe. Keep him away from school and other kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wasn’t there a post almost exactly like this a while back, but “creepy dad” and his supposedly creepy actions were happening at home around the kid’s friends with the kids making almost identical comments as these?

yes and OP said socially awkward and maybe also blamed it on ADHD then too. Swear it’s the same person.

[Anonymous]

Dad needs to stop being creepy. I don’t think being early to car line is weird. However, he needs to sit on his phone instead of eyeballing all the kids. How weird and creepy. This is going to impact your kid if these girls think her dad is creepy and will be a big deal when they tell their parents and your kid is socially isolated bc her dad is a creeper. You also need to have conversation with him about how he needs to never comment on the appearance of teen girls.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I told him about the comments. He was like “don’t they know who I’m. I was bringing water and food at the last tournament.” Then he said maybe it’s better if the sports is a girl thing meaning that DD and I should attend sporting events.

I told him to stop coming early to car line months ago.

OP, the bolded is a wise choice.

So rearrange your responsibilities so that you can drop and pick her up most of the time. It doesn't really matter what others think. The other girls are uncomfortable with him being there, so he needs to make himself less visible.

I was overly cautious about men as a teenager. Any man other than my father and uncles seemed like a dangerous person. It was an overeaction, but it could get someone in trouble. I once saw a man who had fallen on the street near the metro, and I screamed and ran hysterically all the way home. My parents were shocked, and they kept asking me if he had touched me or moved towards me or even spoken to me. He had not even looked in my direction. I could see in their eyes that they were very confused even though they tried to hide their confusion. It was an awkward stage. I was supposed to be a little more independent, but I was still not sure what was creepy/dangerous behavior and what wasn't. Luckily, once anyone realized how uncomfortable I was, they stayed away and/or avoided making eye contact.

These girls are probably trying to figure out how to be more independent and to trust their instincts. It's not easy at this age.

[Anonymous]

Her teammates think he is creepy because he IS being creepy. You said it yourself that he is noticing/commenting on very specific details about the appearance and physique of some of the girls. When someone is watching you like that, you can feel it. Their intuition is rightfully telling them that something about him is off. It's not their job to make allowances for a socially awkward adult. He should modify his behavior.

[Anonymous]

Is this you?

https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1015908.page

Troll? <— Jeff?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wasn’t there a post almost exactly like this a while back, but “creepy dad” and his supposedly creepy actions were happening at home around the kid’s friends with the kids making almost identical comments as these?

And didn’t it involve bike shorts? Or am I not remembering correctly?

[Anonymous]

OP, I have a 14-year-old DD. I do a lot of carpools with 14 and 15 year-olds, plus my daughter has friends over often. Seriously, they use the word creep and creepy all the time, “pedo” also. They think most of their male teachers and male coaches are creeps. When I ask for examples they are ridiculous. For example, they think one of their soccer coaches is a creep because he has been telling one of the girls how great she is playing and how much she has improved. Which she has, but because it comes from a male coach it’s creepy. The little extra attention, instead of feeling encouraged, makes them all think that he is into her. All the examples about their male teaches being creeps are similar to this. I feel for male teachers middle school and high school, as well as male coaches for female teams. It cannot be easy.