I resent my husband for getting me a cheap engagement ring

[Anonymous]

Put on your big girl panties and use your OWN MONEY to upgrade your ring. Why do you think this is your husband's problem? WTF is wrong with you?

[Anonymous]

Poor little baby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'd resent it too if he could have afforded more.

I have a guy friend who made 300k, but he wanted to "test" his girlfriend. He gave her a .75ct ring in a shape she didn't even like and it was white gold when she wanted yellow or rose gold. He said that if she really wanted to marry him, that she would still accept the proposal even with a small ring. She dumped him. She thought his test was just nasty and bitter. A proposal shouldn't be a test or designed to deceive someone. She said she would have preferred to receive no ring rather than a ring he knew she wouldn't like.

Good for her. What he did was super shitty and an omen for how their marriage would have been.

[Anonymous]

So you married your husband so that you could have more ostentatious displays of wealth than the other girls?

If you believe you're behind on the income level, it's time to find a wealthier husband, OP. This is your fail.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I still resent my husband for not getting me a ring even once he could afford to. He makes so much money now and knows it was and is important to me and he still won’t do it.

Why don’t you buy your ring? Isn’t it all marital money anyway? If “he” can afford it, “you” can afford it. Make it a birthday or Christmas present and call it a day.

It means nothing giving it to myself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Those rings are a waste of money. Actual value of a $5k ring is $500 (or less). Only fools are about them.

Only a fool buys a 4 figure item without understanding the secondary market for it. I assure you I could sell my ring for more than I paid, because 1) it’s high quality 2) it has a GIA grading 3) I didn’t overpay in the first place.

Hey, want to buy some oceanfront property in Nebraska too?

You think you’re clever but you don’t see that you’re the chump. People who understand the diamond secondary market know what they’re doing and how to buy diamonds. Sorry you think diamond shopping begins and ends at the mall.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd resent it too if he could have afforded more.

I have a guy friend who made 300k, but he wanted to "test" his girlfriend. He gave her a .75ct ring in a shape she didn't even like and it was white gold when she wanted yellow or rose gold. He said that if she really wanted to marry him, that she would still accept the proposal even with a small ring. She dumped him. She thought his test was just nasty and bitter. A proposal shouldn't be a test or designed to deceive someone. She said she would have preferred to receive no ring rather than a ring he knew she wouldn't like.

Good for her. What he did was super shitty and an omen for how their marriage would have been.

Yes but SO many men say things like this. The ring shouldn't matter, she should be happy with a small ring and it's a test of how much she loves me, etc.

[Anonymous]

My DH knew I wanted a nice ring. I waited and waited. I said nothing even after he proposed without one. Eventually I let him know I really wanted one. He was angry. Then one day he took me ring shopping. He took me to Fifth and Madison in NYC. We visited Cartier, Tiffany, Harry Winston; he had me try on rings there. Then Kwiat, and then lesser and lesser stores. Finally he took me to the diamond district, picked a $1000 ring with visible flaws and haggled over it with the orthodox Jewish jeweler. He hadn’t had any intention of buying it was just to hurt me. He said he couldn’t afford the kind of ring I wanted and I was a terrible person for expecting him to spend money on a ring. He never did it even when he started making over $300k. It was about hurting me.

[Anonymous]

I had a very ornate, very beautiful ring given to me by my former husband who lied, cheated, and was abusive.

I asked my now-husband for a simple solitaire engagement ring and it’s perfect. He also treats me like gold and is my best friend.

Marriage is not about your engagement ring.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd resent it too if he could have afforded more.

I have a guy friend who made 300k, but he wanted to "test" his girlfriend. He gave her a .75ct ring in a shape she didn't even like and it was white gold when she wanted yellow or rose gold. He said that if she really wanted to marry him, that she would still accept the proposal even with a small ring. She dumped him. She thought his test was just nasty and bitter. A proposal shouldn't be a test or designed to deceive someone. She said she would have preferred to receive no ring rather than a ring he knew she wouldn't like.

Good for her. What he did was super shitty and an omen for how their marriage would have been.

Yes but SO many men say things like this. The ring shouldn't matter, she should be happy with a small ring and it's a test of how much she loves me, etc.

By the time someone proposes you should know how they feel about you and about money and status.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DH knew I wanted a nice ring. I waited and waited. I said nothing even after he proposed without one. Eventually I let him know I really wanted one. He was angry. Then one day he took me ring shopping. He took me to Fifth and Madison in NYC. We visited Cartier, Tiffany, Harry Winston; he had me try on rings there. Then Kwiat, and then lesser and lesser stores. Finally he took me to the diamond district, picked a $1000 ring with visible flaws and haggled over it with the orthodox Jewish jeweler. He hadn’t had any intention of buying it was just to hurt me. He said he couldn’t afford the kind of ring I wanted and I was a terrible person for expecting him to spend money on a ring. He never did it even when he started making over $300k. It was about hurting me.

You’re still married to him?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DH knew I wanted a nice ring. I waited and waited. I said nothing even after he proposed without one. Eventually I let him know I really wanted one. He was angry. Then one day he took me ring shopping. He took me to Fifth and Madison in NYC. We visited Cartier, Tiffany, Harry Winston; he had me try on rings there. Then Kwiat, and then lesser and lesser stores. Finally he took me to the diamond district, picked a $1000 ring with visible flaws and haggled over it with the orthodox Jewish jeweler. He hadn’t had any intention of buying it was just to hurt me. He said he couldn’t afford the kind of ring I wanted and I was a terrible person for expecting him to spend money on a ring. He never did it even when he started making over $300k. It was about hurting me.

Girl have some respect for yourself. Why are you married to this jerk? Why isn't he an EX husband?!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I still resent my husband for not getting me a ring even once he could afford to. He makes so much money now and knows it was and is important to me and he still won’t do it.

Why don’t you buy your ring? Isn’t it all marital money anyway? If “he” can afford it, “you” can afford it. Make it a birthday or Christmas present and call it a day.

It means nothing giving it to myself.

If it’s just about wearing something on your hand that you love and makes you feel good, then sure it does. If you’re really trying to assign a dollar value to your husband’s love for you, however, you have way bigger issues than a ring will solve.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I still resent my husband for not getting me a ring even once he could afford to. He makes so much money now and knows it was and is important to me and he still won’t do it.

Why don’t you buy your ring? Isn’t it all marital money anyway? If “he” can afford it, “you” can afford it. Make it a birthday or Christmas present and call it a day.

It means nothing giving it to myself.

If it’s just about wearing something on your hand that you love and makes you feel good, then sure it does. If you’re really trying to assign a dollar value to your husband’s love for you, however, you have way bigger issues than a ring will solve.

It’s about him having the altruism and tenderness to do something that is meaningful to me even if it doesn’t matter to him. He is not that person though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DH knew I wanted a nice ring. I waited and waited. I said nothing even after he proposed without one. Eventually I let him know I really wanted one. He was angry. Then one day he took me ring shopping. He took me to Fifth and Madison in NYC. We visited Cartier, Tiffany, Harry Winston; he had me try on rings there. Then Kwiat, and then lesser and lesser stores. Finally he took me to the diamond district, picked a $1000 ring with visible flaws and haggled over it with the orthodox Jewish jeweler. He hadn’t had any intention of buying it was just to hurt me. He said he couldn’t afford the kind of ring I wanted and I was a terrible person for expecting him to spend money on a ring. He never did it even when he started making over $300k. It was about hurting me.

lol is this a Jodi Picoult audiobook