Do women do more or just complain more?
![[Post New]](/jforum/templates/default/images/icon_minipost_new.gif){kind=icon}
Anonymous
LOL at the dudes here who think they’ve done anything remotely like putting a man on the moon. Lemme guess, at best you’re what, middle management? Wow, such an accomplishment 🙄 But go ahead, keep acting like you’ve made some sort of scientific or engineering breakthrough. |
Anonymous
|
They do a lot more and complain a lot more.
It's close to 50/50 for me and DH. And i don't complain. However most women I know put up with a lot of crop and do too much. And then they complain. |
Anonymous
|
Women not only do more but we are often the driving force behind our husband doing things too, and making sure our DHs are contributing is a massive burden that men almost never carry.
For instance, during the holidays I make sure my DH buys the kids done gifts himself, cooks certain meals, plans and participates in certain events, helps clean the house, and spends quality time with each kid. Without my effort, he’d do about 10% of this. He’d say it’s because he just doesn’t value it as much as I do, and he’d be right. But what he may not understand is that I’m not really doing it for me. I like cleaning, I’m happy with takeout, I’m excellent and efficient at selecting, buying, and wrapping gifts. I could do the whole holiday myself, since I “value” it, and it would honestly be easier than pushing him to participate. But I do it for the kids, because I know it’s important for them to have two engaged, interested parents. So I work to make sure my DH is engaged. It’s exhausting— his desire to just check out and play video games is strong. And I know nagging doesn’t work so I have to do for him what I do for my kids— properly incentivize. It’s hard. But the end result is a functional family and strong bonds between him and his kids. None of them even understand I’m doing this. Anyway, don’t try to tell me men and women do the same amount. My DH has never had to encourage me to spend time with my kids instead of staring at a screen, and he certainly doesn’t make effort to plan events I will enjoy specifically to ensure I stay engaged and have reasons to interact with the kids. I don’t need him to! Come on. |
Anonymous
Its both but they discount anything they are or have not done. |
Anonymous
Speaking of things that matter and things that don’t... A lot of this sounds like a lot of frantic activity as a defense against impotence. If you aren’t going to participate in the important things in life like feeding your family and raising your children, then you need to find some way to feel important and worthwhile. Where would men be without politics and rivalries and criminals and lawyers on both sides? |
Anonymous
You are missing the point. Women are now also “building dams and putting people on the moon” or whatever the 2021 equivalent of that is. Problem is that time off work is more restorative to men and less restorative to women. |
Anonymous
Then spend your off-work time differently. You’re an adult. Take responsibility for your own actions. |
Anonymous
| They complain a lot more. Pick any topic on this site. Guess what. Women are complaining in each and every topic |
Anonymous
+1. And what about taking each other down? What’s that about?? Women don’t need men’s help for that. |
Anonymous
No. The problem is that we have to stop in the middle of whatever we are doing to set the table and pick up the kid from soccer because no one else is going to do it. It’s impossible to get ahead if you are starting from behind AND you have to be out the door by the time daycare closes EVERY DAY. |
Anonymous
|
Women do more at home. But a lot the work they create for themselves by over scheduling and micromanaging their children. Then the same women get angry with their husbands who don’t want to participate in that insanity.
Kids used to just be let out of the house to do whatever they wanted until dinner time. Parents had their own little lives. Now most kids’ lives are hyper-structured. Women are largely responsible for this. |
Anonymous
| I do a lot more than my husband but he’s gone 7am-7pm and I work 30 hours a week so I do have more time. He’s pretty good on weekends helping with chores etc and we live very well because of what he earns. I do complain once in awhile but I’m definitely not a complainer. |
Anonymous
| There's lots of studies showing women spend more time parenting now than they did in the 1950s and 1960s, even though back then they were not also holding a job. It's no wonder they feel stressed out and put upon. But it's also hard to think they really need to be spending all that time parenting |
Anonymous
NP here (and a woman who is a rocket scientist). Women actually contributed to these things, but men downplayed their role or stole credit. I work with a ton of men, unsurprisingly, and one common theme is the extent to which they overestimate their contribution and their aptitude. |
Anonymous
|
This thread, like so many on this board, reminds me of the John F. Kennedy quote:
“The great enemy of truth is very often not the lie--deliberate, contrived and dishonest--but the myth--persistent, persuasive and unrealistic. Too often we hold fast to the clichés of our forebears. We subject all facts to a prefabricated set of interpretations. We enjoy the comfort of opinion without the discomfort of thought." |