WDYD with a teen party with alcohol?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am truly interested in what kind of high school experience the call the police posters had. We drank all the time, went to top DC schools, went to great colleges, and were generally fine. We were drinking beer and, back then, smoking cigarettes. We weren't doing anything too crazy.

Did these posters not go to parties, and assume parties involved cocaine and sex trafficking or something? This level of outrage is such an extreme take on normal teen behavior. You have to teach your kid how to exist in the world. It's not your job to shut down teenage activity as a general matter.

The OP is talking about parents supplying alcohol to teenagers. I don't know why you think that's all right, because it's not. You were lucky that nothing bad came of your frequent drinking as a teen; many aren't so fortunate.

Next time, call the cops, OP.

No, she is talking about a party where there are no adults and alcohol is present.

I am not promoting alcohol use, but the hysterical reaction on this site leads me to believe many posters just have zero experience with teen drinking. The advice is often way over the top.

No, we just think we need to stop normalizing passed out teens that don't know where they are or are passed out.

That is not the job of cops.

Sure it is. They'd much rather be called for prevention rather than after a catastrophe.

[Anonymous]

My former neighbor's daughter threw a party, complete with drugs and alcohol, when they were away. We noticed a lot of comings and goings (they usually inform us when they're throwing a party, as it impacts out ability to get in and out of our house), and called to ask if their guests needed to use our parking spaces. Dad was furious, and called the cops. The girl's BFF left the party with two boys before the cops got there, and they crashed the car. One of the boys was seriously hurt.

Anyway, I'm in Camp 'Call the Cops'.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just a thought - how many of the parents saying call the cops on your teens are white vs POC?

Does it matter? Someone who can assure that none of these kids are going to be driving needs to be. called. Color has nothing to do with it. this isnt the 80s for all of you reminiscing about your drug and alcohol use in the woods and under the bleachers.

Color may color the police response. I would be much more comfortable calling the cops on a party of white kids at a white family’s house bc I know the cops would rest them fairly and just break up the party and get people home safe, rather shooting a kid.

NP but of course it matters. Have you been paying attention at all? Calling the police on a group of BIPOC teens could be subjecting them to serious harm... for drinking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am truly interested in what kind of high school experience the call the police posters had. We drank all the time, went to top DC schools, went to great colleges, and were generally fine. We were drinking beer and, back then, smoking cigarettes. We weren't doing anything too crazy.

Did these posters not go to parties, and assume parties involved cocaine and sex trafficking or something? This level of outrage is such an extreme take on normal teen behavior. You have to teach your kid how to exist in the world. It's not your job to shut down teenage activity as a general matter.

I had a fabulous high school experience! I'm in my 50s, grew up in the midwest where everyone was driving by the age of 15 (didn't need a license to drive a farm vehicle and everyone had a farm truck). I went to a lot of parties with alcohol, weed and cigarettes. I never got into any accidents or trouble. Yet, I would still call the police if I were OP because I recognize just how very lucky I was. Several of my high school friends and college roommates weren't so lucky. Several were involved in accidents, One friend, our senior year, was killed when he hit a bridge guard rail right in front of our farm. One of my college roommates killed a passenger while drinking and driving.

So, yeah, I recognize that just because something has been normalized doesn't mean it's okay.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just a thought - how many of the parents saying call the cops on your teens are white vs POC?

Does it matter? Someone who can assure that none of these kids are going to be driving needs to be. called. Color has nothing to do with it. this isnt the 80s for all of you reminiscing about your drug and alcohol use in the woods and under the bleachers.

Color may color the police response. I would be much more comfortable calling the cops on a party of white kids at a white family’s house bc I know the cops would rest them fairly and just break up the party and get people home safe, rather shooting a kid.

NP but of course it matters. Have you been paying attention at all? Calling the police on a group of BIPOC teens could be subjecting them to serious harm... for drinking.

Well, these same teens can get in a car and subject themselves and others to harm. If I see kids getting into cars, ould still call the cops. There isnt another alternative. . If the parents are away, what good are they going to do at that moment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am truly interested in what kind of high school experience the call the police posters had. We drank all the time, went to top DC schools, went to great colleges, and were generally fine. We were drinking beer and, back then, smoking cigarettes. We weren't doing anything too crazy.

Did these posters not go to parties, and assume parties involved cocaine and sex trafficking or something? This level of outrage is such an extreme take on normal teen behavior. You have to teach your kid how to exist in the world. It's not your job to shut down teenage activity as a general matter.

How old are your kids?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am truly interested in what kind of high school experience the call the police posters had. We drank all the time, went to top DC schools, went to great colleges, and were generally fine. We were drinking beer and, back then, smoking cigarettes. We weren't doing anything too crazy.

Did these posters not go to parties, and assume parties involved cocaine and sex trafficking or something? This level of outrage is such an extreme take on normal teen behavior. You have to teach your kid how to exist in the world. It's not your job to shut down teenage activity as a general matter.

The OP is talking about parents supplying alcohol to teenagers. I don't know why you think that's all right, because it's not. You were lucky that nothing bad came of your frequent drinking as a teen; many aren't so fortunate.

Next time, call the cops, OP.

No, she is talking about a party where there are no adults and alcohol is present.

I am not promoting alcohol use, but the hysterical reaction on this site leads me to believe many posters just have zero experience with teen drinking. The advice is often way over the top.

No, we just think we need to stop normalizing passed out teens that don't know where they are or are passed out.

That is not the job of cops.

Sure it is. They'd much rather be called for prevention rather than after a catastrophe.

You don’t need guns or police over to call a parent. Do your job and stop expecting cops to do it for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just a thought - how many of the parents saying call the cops on your teens are white vs POC?

Does it matter? Someone who can assure that none of these kids are going to be driving needs to be. called. Color has nothing to do with it. this isnt the 80s for all of you reminiscing about your drug and alcohol use in the woods and under the bleachers.

OPs daughter is breaking the law. Is she calling the cops on her child too?

No! Why ?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you become aware that a group of teens are throwing a party without adults visibly present and with alcohol present, is there an obligation to report? I am locked in a battle with my spouse.

We know the kids, and they've had a long history of being up to no good. DD went to that party with a group of her own friends and by the time I picked her and a friend up, the friend was wasted, passed out on a couch. I did my parenting best to talk about decisions, alcohol, situations that turn on a dime. DH was not home, and now he thinks I should have called the cops on the party after I picked up the girls. I'm pretty sure she will run into this again and again, and I want to maintain some sanity with her. I'd rather she volunteers where she's gong and what's going on than fear the consequences to the point she clams up. Yet given this particular group of kids' history, I do agree that sooner or later they will run into trouble. DH's point: how would you feel if you found that something happened later that night?

Opinions on this?

MYOB and deal with your own kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How old are you parents? do you not remember the death of a Whitman senior from drinking in Dec. 2017?

One kid dying from drinking is terrible. But its a pretty small statistic. Kids die from many different causes all.the time. I would never call the police on a party.

[Anonymous]

I have a feeling a lot of the "call the cops" posters have elementary and middle school children. Would love to know how many of you have high school or college aged kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am truly interested in what kind of high school experience the call the police posters had. We drank all the time, went to top DC schools, went to great colleges, and were generally fine. We were drinking beer and, back then, smoking cigarettes. We weren't doing anything too crazy.

Did these posters not go to parties, and assume parties involved cocaine and sex trafficking or something? This level of outrage is such an extreme take on normal teen behavior. You have to teach your kid how to exist in the world. It's not your job to shut down teenage activity as a general matter.

I grew up in this area as well and my experiences compared to my teens' experiences is like night and day.

The partying and drinking we did back then was like PG-13 rated, if you will. It was pretty harmless. We drank mainly beer, had some liquor when someone smuggled it from a parent, and the worst drugs was weed. Of course, everyone smoked cigs. This was HS years 1995-1999. I don't remember any friends ever drinking so much they blacked out. The hardest drug ever offered to me was shrooms once.

The partying and drinking that my kids have told me about is like NC-17 or more. Most of my son's friends have fake IDs. He's said he doesn't and I haven't found one, but he's showed me several videos on how easy it is to order one. It's not uncommon to have 2 or 3 kids drinking so much that they pass out. Some kids think it's okay to have one drink and still be the DD or smoke weed and be the DD! They smoke weed like we did cigarettes. The drugs they take at these parties are much harder, like coke and molly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am truly interested in what kind of high school experience the call the police posters had. We drank all the time, went to top DC schools, went to great colleges, and were generally fine. We were drinking beer and, back then, smoking cigarettes. We weren't doing anything too crazy.

Did these posters not go to parties, and assume parties involved cocaine and sex trafficking or something? This level of outrage is such an extreme take on normal teen behavior. You have to teach your kid how to exist in the world. It's not your job to shut down teenage activity as a general matter.

You are 100% wrong.
OP should have called the police. Drinking age 21

Why did you go to cocaine and sex trafficking trumpet? That's on you.

Of course, teens drink no one is denying that but it does not mean they should not have consequences to their actions. Again it's illegal.


Team DH OP you should have called the police.

You are hysterical. I don’t report all illegal activity undertaken by people to the police, and I do not consider teen drinking to require my intervention. This is not like a kidnapping in progress. Get a grip.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a feeling a lot of the "call the cops" posters have elementary and middle school children. Would love to know how many of you have high school or college aged kids.

12:29 here. As I said in my post, I'm in my 50s. My 4 kids are in high school/college. I'd definitely call the cops.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How old are you parents? do you not remember the death of a Whitman senior from drinking in Dec. 2017?

One kid dying from drinking is terrible. But its a pretty small statistic. Kids die from many different causes all.the time. I would never call the police on a party.

Half your children dying before graduating is not a small statistic to his family. How completely sociopathic you are.