Do you think feminism has been a net positive or net negative for relationships?

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Anonymous wrote:Obviously it's a negative for relationships. That doesn't meant there aren't other positives. But for relationships, no. Now women don't need men and men don't need women.


Do you think relationships are better when they reflect “needs“? I think the fact that I don’t “need” my husband to support me financially, sign for any business deal I do, or give me permission for medical treatment makes our relationship much better. Is your hypothesis that in places where women do not have rights, relationship relationships are better? Because, at least a news reporting, there seem to be a lot of murders and suicides of women being abused.


The question one is it better for relationships. No. It's not. Men can get the sex they want by never marrying and women can support themselves and kids if they want them. Neither "needs" a relationship to get their needs met.


People should never need to be together. They should want to be together.


Except that was the point of the social contract between men and women that worked for eons. And now that's broken. Men can get sex whenever they want and women can support themselves. There really is no point to a relationship for most people. Soon there will be bots so men won't even need a real woman. You can decide if that's better or not.


I don't think this is true, because men as a group haven't done the work to become more balanced people, but women have. Men can't get sex whenever they want because it requires a woman to want to have sex with them (and women have more choice than ever now), and it seems like there are things a lot of men want and either can only get in relationships or vastly prefer to get them in relationships (kids, societal connections and belonging, stability, etc.). Women also seem to prefer getting these in relationships, though it seems on the whole, women who don't find marriage are better able to attain these things than men do.

I think of my BIL who is never married, quite bitter about it, and very lonely. He lacks a lot of social skills that would enable him to build and maintain friendships, doesn't really know how to make his home nice, and absolutely could not raise kids on his own. Then I think of the half dozen female friends I have who are also never married, but still have really lovely lives. They are financially stable and work to give their lives structure and meaning without a spouse. Several of them have had kids on their own and done a good job of figuring out how to make that work (often living near family to ensure greater stability, making enough to afford nannies and other supports to cover childcare gaps). Others instead focus on friendships, travel, and hobbies. They are all very happy. I think all of them would have been happy to marry IF they had found the right person at the right time, but they didn't and demonstrated a lot of resiliency in figuring out how to make it work for them anyway.

Meanwhile my BIL sits around angry at the world for not providing him with a wife to compensate for all his shortcomings. He wanted someone who would not only give him sex, but also children and create a comfortable home for him and manage his social life and cook his meals. He also would have needed a woman who would do all that while also earning an income, because he's a low earner who is often unemployed and would not have been able to support a family on his own. My MIL often laments his "bad luck" in not finding a partner but the truth is that I've never met a woman who would be willing to take all that on. He has had several lengthy and somewhat serious relationships but they don't last because he'll start out on his best behavior and then as he reveals himself to her, she realizes what she's taking on and leaves. One of his ex girlfriends was a single mom in her 40s -- she chose to stay a single mom rather than take on BIL as essentially a second dependent. More recently he dated a woman in her late 40s who never had kids and likely didn't have a ton of other romantic prospects. That one lasted two years but ultimately she decided she'd rather be alone than deal with BIL. And I've heard of other stories like this for other men. The women who reject them do fine even if it means being alone. The men don't.

The biggest problem with feminism is that some men have not stepped up to the plate and bettered themselves to make themselves worthy of women and marriage. When women have the choice to support themselves and be alone, it might not be their first choice but they can make it work and some even really enjoy it. And men suffer because before feminism, those women would have HAD to marry. Independence was not an option and they would have been really exposed and in danger of starvation or physical harm without a husband. That single mom especially would likely never have chosen to give up the protection of a husband, even one as burdensome as my BIL, because her prospects would have been so bad.

Feminism is a net positive for women in relationships because it has allowed us to choose, and offered us an alternative to marriage if we can't find a man we want to marry. For reasons I frankly don't understand, men have not seized the opportunity to make that same choice for themselves, and there are too many men (see the incel movement if you are looking for examples) still view access to women and a wife as a god-given right even though they've done nothing to earn the love of a woman.



+1000000000 YES


That's great that you keep telling us why women don't need men. But men don't need women either. If you think this is a plus for society then we'll have to agree to disagree. If you have children you might be wondering what the future will look like for them.


Which aspect of feminism are you suggesting it’s in my daughter’s best interest to roll back? The laws that keep her from being raped by her future spouse? The legal right to leave her marriage? The right to have medical treatment without her husband’s permission? Truly what am I supposed to be worrying about for her?


Did the PP ever respond to these questions?


Of course not, because its easier to complain about feminism when you don’t have to deal with facts and can just make vague assertions of doom.


Vague assertions of doom? What planet do you all live on where the future is bright?


Oh good you're still here! Could you tell me which parts of the future will be brighter for my daughter if her husband can rape her at will? If she needs his permission for lifesaving medical care? Or if she can’t have a credit card without his signature?


Your daughter won't get married so it's really irrelevant this fake rape scenario. Our daughters will all be single, working their fingers to the bone in a purposeless life, wondering what the point of life is.

You need to stop reading tradwife fanfiction by incels and comprehend that being a stay at home mom is extremely hard work -- except it thankless, with zero promotions, zero severance, zero sick days, zero pay, and zero protections from your stupid husband. What is this silly narrative that only paid employment is "working their fingers to the bone"?


Do tell us where all these eligible bachelors will be found in the future! On college campuses? Where?

Are you mentally ill? Where did I mention eligible bachelors?


Then who will your daughter be marrying and potentially raped by? I've said all along she won't be getting married at all.

How exactly am I supposed to know what you have said "all along" on an anonymous forum? And how is your bizarre non sequitur even a response to what I wrote about the hardships of being a SAHM?


Who cares about SAHM? I know you don't. Feminists sure don't. But marriage as an institution is hanging on by a thread while people are patting themselves on the back for being a positive thing for relationships. Ok!


Don't you have some clothes to wash, asses to wipe? You are waaaayyyy out of your depth here.

All of you trad wives shit on feminism, until of course, your husbands cheat on you and you need to enjoy all of the protections that feminism affords you.


Your husbands? What about yours? Are you even in a relationship?


Because I need a husband in order to be credible? BAHAHAHAHAHAAHA


Where did you get your expertise on relationships?


I'm a woman and a feminist. My relationship status is irrelevant. But how unsurprising that a trad wife can only see herself through the eyes of her husband. Please make sure you stay with him if he cheats, beats you, or abuses you financially. Those benefits we enjoy after fighting for them are not for you.


Go pet your cats. You don't know anything about relationships.
Anonymous
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Anonymous wrote:Obviously it's a negative for relationships. That doesn't meant there aren't other positives. But for relationships, no. Now women don't need men and men don't need women.


Do you think relationships are better when they reflect “needs“? I think the fact that I don’t “need” my husband to support me financially, sign for any business deal I do, or give me permission for medical treatment makes our relationship much better. Is your hypothesis that in places where women do not have rights, relationship relationships are better? Because, at least a news reporting, there seem to be a lot of murders and suicides of women being abused.


The question one is it better for relationships. No. It's not. Men can get the sex they want by never marrying and women can support themselves and kids if they want them. Neither "needs" a relationship to get their needs met.


People should never need to be together. They should want to be together.


Except that was the point of the social contract between men and women that worked for eons. And now that's broken. Men can get sex whenever they want and women can support themselves. There really is no point to a relationship for most people. Soon there will be bots so men won't even need a real woman. You can decide if that's better or not.


I don't think this is true, because men as a group haven't done the work to become more balanced people, but women have. Men can't get sex whenever they want because it requires a woman to want to have sex with them (and women have more choice than ever now), and it seems like there are things a lot of men want and either can only get in relationships or vastly prefer to get them in relationships (kids, societal connections and belonging, stability, etc.). Women also seem to prefer getting these in relationships, though it seems on the whole, women who don't find marriage are better able to attain these things than men do.

I think of my BIL who is never married, quite bitter about it, and very lonely. He lacks a lot of social skills that would enable him to build and maintain friendships, doesn't really know how to make his home nice, and absolutely could not raise kids on his own. Then I think of the half dozen female friends I have who are also never married, but still have really lovely lives. They are financially stable and work to give their lives structure and meaning without a spouse. Several of them have had kids on their own and done a good job of figuring out how to make that work (often living near family to ensure greater stability, making enough to afford nannies and other supports to cover childcare gaps). Others instead focus on friendships, travel, and hobbies. They are all very happy. I think all of them would have been happy to marry IF they had found the right person at the right time, but they didn't and demonstrated a lot of resiliency in figuring out how to make it work for them anyway.

Meanwhile my BIL sits around angry at the world for not providing him with a wife to compensate for all his shortcomings. He wanted someone who would not only give him sex, but also children and create a comfortable home for him and manage his social life and cook his meals. He also would have needed a woman who would do all that while also earning an income, because he's a low earner who is often unemployed and would not have been able to support a family on his own. My MIL often laments his "bad luck" in not finding a partner but the truth is that I've never met a woman who would be willing to take all that on. He has had several lengthy and somewhat serious relationships but they don't last because he'll start out on his best behavior and then as he reveals himself to her, she realizes what she's taking on and leaves. One of his ex girlfriends was a single mom in her 40s -- she chose to stay a single mom rather than take on BIL as essentially a second dependent. More recently he dated a woman in her late 40s who never had kids and likely didn't have a ton of other romantic prospects. That one lasted two years but ultimately she decided she'd rather be alone than deal with BIL. And I've heard of other stories like this for other men. The women who reject them do fine even if it means being alone. The men don't.

The biggest problem with feminism is that some men have not stepped up to the plate and bettered themselves to make themselves worthy of women and marriage. When women have the choice to support themselves and be alone, it might not be their first choice but they can make it work and some even really enjoy it. And men suffer because before feminism, those women would have HAD to marry. Independence was not an option and they would have been really exposed and in danger of starvation or physical harm without a husband. That single mom especially would likely never have chosen to give up the protection of a husband, even one as burdensome as my BIL, because her prospects would have been so bad.

Feminism is a net positive for women in relationships because it has allowed us to choose, and offered us an alternative to marriage if we can't find a man we want to marry. For reasons I frankly don't understand, men have not seized the opportunity to make that same choice for themselves, and there are too many men (see the incel movement if you are looking for examples) still view access to women and a wife as a god-given right even though they've done nothing to earn the love of a woman.



+1000000000 YES


That's great that you keep telling us why women don't need men. But men don't need women either. If you think this is a plus for society then we'll have to agree to disagree. If you have children you might be wondering what the future will look like for them.


Which aspect of feminism are you suggesting it’s in my daughter’s best interest to roll back? The laws that keep her from being raped by her future spouse? The legal right to leave her marriage? The right to have medical treatment without her husband’s permission? Truly what am I supposed to be worrying about for her?


Did the PP ever respond to these questions?


Of course not, because its easier to complain about feminism when you don’t have to deal with facts and can just make vague assertions of doom.


Vague assertions of doom? What planet do you all live on where the future is bright?


Oh good you're still here! Could you tell me which parts of the future will be brighter for my daughter if her husband can rape her at will? If she needs his permission for lifesaving medical care? Or if she can’t have a credit card without his signature?


Your daughter won't get married so it's really irrelevant this fake rape scenario. Our daughters will all be single, working their fingers to the bone in a purposeless life, wondering what the point of life is.

You need to stop reading tradwife fanfiction by incels and comprehend that being a stay at home mom is extremely hard work -- except it thankless, with zero promotions, zero severance, zero sick days, zero pay, and zero protections from your stupid husband. What is this silly narrative that only paid employment is "working their fingers to the bone"?


Do tell us where all these eligible bachelors will be found in the future! On college campuses? Where?

Are you mentally ill? Where did I mention eligible bachelors?


Then who will your daughter be marrying and potentially raped by? I've said all along she won't be getting married at all.

How exactly am I supposed to know what you have said "all along" on an anonymous forum? And how is your bizarre non sequitur even a response to what I wrote about the hardships of being a SAHM?


Who cares about SAHM? I know you don't. Feminists sure don't. But marriage as an institution is hanging on by a thread while people are patting themselves on the back for being a positive thing for relationships. Ok!


Don't you have some clothes to wash, asses to wipe? You are waaaayyyy out of your depth here.

All of you trad wives shit on feminism, until of course, your husbands cheat on you and you need to enjoy all of the protections that feminism affords you.


Your husbands? What about yours? Are you even in a relationship?


Because I need a husband in order to be credible? BAHAHAHAHAHAAHA


Where did you get your expertise on relationships?


I'm a woman and a feminist. My relationship status is irrelevant. But how unsurprising that a trad wife can only see herself through the eyes of her husband. Please make sure you stay with him if he cheats, beats you, or abuses you financially. Those benefits we enjoy after fighting for them are not for you.


Go pet your cats. You don't know anything about relationships.


Oh honey, you are so sad. You don't even understand most of what is being discussed here. Go bake something.
Anonymous
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Anonymous wrote:
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Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Obviously it's a negative for relationships. That doesn't meant there aren't other positives. But for relationships, no. Now women don't need men and men don't need women.


Do you think relationships are better when they reflect “needs“? I think the fact that I don’t “need” my husband to support me financially, sign for any business deal I do, or give me permission for medical treatment makes our relationship much better. Is your hypothesis that in places where women do not have rights, relationship relationships are better? Because, at least a news reporting, there seem to be a lot of murders and suicides of women being abused.


The question one is it better for relationships. No. It's not. Men can get the sex they want by never marrying and women can support themselves and kids if they want them. Neither "needs" a relationship to get their needs met.


People should never need to be together. They should want to be together.


Except that was the point of the social contract between men and women that worked for eons. And now that's broken. Men can get sex whenever they want and women can support themselves. There really is no point to a relationship for most people. Soon there will be bots so men won't even need a real woman. You can decide if that's better or not.


I don't think this is true, because men as a group haven't done the work to become more balanced people, but women have. Men can't get sex whenever they want because it requires a woman to want to have sex with them (and women have more choice than ever now), and it seems like there are things a lot of men want and either can only get in relationships or vastly prefer to get them in relationships (kids, societal connections and belonging, stability, etc.). Women also seem to prefer getting these in relationships, though it seems on the whole, women who don't find marriage are better able to attain these things than men do.

I think of my BIL who is never married, quite bitter about it, and very lonely. He lacks a lot of social skills that would enable him to build and maintain friendships, doesn't really know how to make his home nice, and absolutely could not raise kids on his own. Then I think of the half dozen female friends I have who are also never married, but still have really lovely lives. They are financially stable and work to give their lives structure and meaning without a spouse. Several of them have had kids on their own and done a good job of figuring out how to make that work (often living near family to ensure greater stability, making enough to afford nannies and other supports to cover childcare gaps). Others instead focus on friendships, travel, and hobbies. They are all very happy. I think all of them would have been happy to marry IF they had found the right person at the right time, but they didn't and demonstrated a lot of resiliency in figuring out how to make it work for them anyway.

Meanwhile my BIL sits around angry at the world for not providing him with a wife to compensate for all his shortcomings. He wanted someone who would not only give him sex, but also children and create a comfortable home for him and manage his social life and cook his meals. He also would have needed a woman who would do all that while also earning an income, because he's a low earner who is often unemployed and would not have been able to support a family on his own. My MIL often laments his "bad luck" in not finding a partner but the truth is that I've never met a woman who would be willing to take all that on. He has had several lengthy and somewhat serious relationships but they don't last because he'll start out on his best behavior and then as he reveals himself to her, she realizes what she's taking on and leaves. One of his ex girlfriends was a single mom in her 40s -- she chose to stay a single mom rather than take on BIL as essentially a second dependent. More recently he dated a woman in her late 40s who never had kids and likely didn't have a ton of other romantic prospects. That one lasted two years but ultimately she decided she'd rather be alone than deal with BIL. And I've heard of other stories like this for other men. The women who reject them do fine even if it means being alone. The men don't.

The biggest problem with feminism is that some men have not stepped up to the plate and bettered themselves to make themselves worthy of women and marriage. When women have the choice to support themselves and be alone, it might not be their first choice but they can make it work and some even really enjoy it. And men suffer because before feminism, those women would have HAD to marry. Independence was not an option and they would have been really exposed and in danger of starvation or physical harm without a husband. That single mom especially would likely never have chosen to give up the protection of a husband, even one as burdensome as my BIL, because her prospects would have been so bad.

Feminism is a net positive for women in relationships because it has allowed us to choose, and offered us an alternative to marriage if we can't find a man we want to marry. For reasons I frankly don't understand, men have not seized the opportunity to make that same choice for themselves, and there are too many men (see the incel movement if you are looking for examples) still view access to women and a wife as a god-given right even though they've done nothing to earn the love of a woman.



+1000000000 YES


That's great that you keep telling us why women don't need men. But men don't need women either. If you think this is a plus for society then we'll have to agree to disagree. If you have children you might be wondering what the future will look like for them.


Which aspect of feminism are you suggesting it’s in my daughter’s best interest to roll back? The laws that keep her from being raped by her future spouse? The legal right to leave her marriage? The right to have medical treatment without her husband’s permission? Truly what am I supposed to be worrying about for her?


Did the PP ever respond to these questions?


Of course not, because its easier to complain about feminism when you don’t have to deal with facts and can just make vague assertions of doom.


Vague assertions of doom? What planet do you all live on where the future is bright?


Oh good you're still here! Could you tell me which parts of the future will be brighter for my daughter if her husband can rape her at will? If she needs his permission for lifesaving medical care? Or if she can’t have a credit card without his signature?


Your daughter won't get married so it's really irrelevant this fake rape scenario. Our daughters will all be single, working their fingers to the bone in a purposeless life, wondering what the point of life is.

You need to stop reading tradwife fanfiction by incels and comprehend that being a stay at home mom is extremely hard work -- except it thankless, with zero promotions, zero severance, zero sick days, zero pay, and zero protections from your stupid husband. What is this silly narrative that only paid employment is "working their fingers to the bone"?


Do tell us where all these eligible bachelors will be found in the future! On college campuses? Where?

Are you mentally ill? Where did I mention eligible bachelors?


Then who will your daughter be marrying and potentially raped by? I've said all along she won't be getting married at all.

How exactly am I supposed to know what you have said "all along" on an anonymous forum? And how is your bizarre non sequitur even a response to what I wrote about the hardships of being a SAHM?


Who cares about SAHM? I know you don't. Feminists sure don't. But marriage as an institution is hanging on by a thread while people are patting themselves on the back for being a positive thing for relationships. Ok!


Don't you have some clothes to wash, asses to wipe? You are waaaayyyy out of your depth here.

All of you trad wives shit on feminism, until of course, your husbands cheat on you and you need to enjoy all of the protections that feminism affords you.


Your husbands? What about yours? Are you even in a relationship?


Because I need a husband in order to be credible? BAHAHAHAHAHAAHA


Where did you get your expertise on relationships?


I'm a woman and a feminist. My relationship status is irrelevant. But how unsurprising that a trad wife can only see herself through the eyes of her husband. Please make sure you stay with him if he cheats, beats you, or abuses you financially. Those benefits we enjoy after fighting for them are not for you.


Go pet your cats. You don't know anything about relationships.


Oh honey, you are so sad. You don't even understand most of what is being discussed here. Go bake something.


DP. Do you both not find it weird that you're are trading in misogynistic tropes ("cat lady" and "get back in the kitchen") to take jabs at each other in a thread about feminism?

Sigh
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Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Obviously it's a negative for relationships. That doesn't meant there aren't other positives. But for relationships, no. Now women don't need men and men don't need women.


Do you think relationships are better when they reflect “needs“? I think the fact that I don’t “need” my husband to support me financially, sign for any business deal I do, or give me permission for medical treatment makes our relationship much better. Is your hypothesis that in places where women do not have rights, relationship relationships are better? Because, at least a news reporting, there seem to be a lot of murders and suicides of women being abused.


The question one is it better for relationships. No. It's not. Men can get the sex they want by never marrying and women can support themselves and kids if they want them. Neither "needs" a relationship to get their needs met.


People should never need to be together. They should want to be together.


Except that was the point of the social contract between men and women that worked for eons. And now that's broken. Men can get sex whenever they want and women can support themselves. There really is no point to a relationship for most people. Soon there will be bots so men won't even need a real woman. You can decide if that's better or not.


I don't think this is true, because men as a group haven't done the work to become more balanced people, but women have. Men can't get sex whenever they want because it requires a woman to want to have sex with them (and women have more choice than ever now), and it seems like there are things a lot of men want and either can only get in relationships or vastly prefer to get them in relationships (kids, societal connections and belonging, stability, etc.). Women also seem to prefer getting these in relationships, though it seems on the whole, women who don't find marriage are better able to attain these things than men do.

I think of my BIL who is never married, quite bitter about it, and very lonely. He lacks a lot of social skills that would enable him to build and maintain friendships, doesn't really know how to make his home nice, and absolutely could not raise kids on his own. Then I think of the half dozen female friends I have who are also never married, but still have really lovely lives. They are financially stable and work to give their lives structure and meaning without a spouse. Several of them have had kids on their own and done a good job of figuring out how to make that work (often living near family to ensure greater stability, making enough to afford nannies and other supports to cover childcare gaps). Others instead focus on friendships, travel, and hobbies. They are all very happy. I think all of them would have been happy to marry IF they had found the right person at the right time, but they didn't and demonstrated a lot of resiliency in figuring out how to make it work for them anyway.

Meanwhile my BIL sits around angry at the world for not providing him with a wife to compensate for all his shortcomings. He wanted someone who would not only give him sex, but also children and create a comfortable home for him and manage his social life and cook his meals. He also would have needed a woman who would do all that while also earning an income, because he's a low earner who is often unemployed and would not have been able to support a family on his own. My MIL often laments his "bad luck" in not finding a partner but the truth is that I've never met a woman who would be willing to take all that on. He has had several lengthy and somewhat serious relationships but they don't last because he'll start out on his best behavior and then as he reveals himself to her, she realizes what she's taking on and leaves. One of his ex girlfriends was a single mom in her 40s -- she chose to stay a single mom rather than take on BIL as essentially a second dependent. More recently he dated a woman in her late 40s who never had kids and likely didn't have a ton of other romantic prospects. That one lasted two years but ultimately she decided she'd rather be alone than deal with BIL. And I've heard of other stories like this for other men. The women who reject them do fine even if it means being alone. The men don't.

The biggest problem with feminism is that some men have not stepped up to the plate and bettered themselves to make themselves worthy of women and marriage. When women have the choice to support themselves and be alone, it might not be their first choice but they can make it work and some even really enjoy it. And men suffer because before feminism, those women would have HAD to marry. Independence was not an option and they would have been really exposed and in danger of starvation or physical harm without a husband. That single mom especially would likely never have chosen to give up the protection of a husband, even one as burdensome as my BIL, because her prospects would have been so bad.

Feminism is a net positive for women in relationships because it has allowed us to choose, and offered us an alternative to marriage if we can't find a man we want to marry. For reasons I frankly don't understand, men have not seized the opportunity to make that same choice for themselves, and there are too many men (see the incel movement if you are looking for examples) still view access to women and a wife as a god-given right even though they've done nothing to earn the love of a woman.



+1000000000 YES


That's great that you keep telling us why women don't need men. But men don't need women either. If you think this is a plus for society then we'll have to agree to disagree. If you have children you might be wondering what the future will look like for them.


Which aspect of feminism are you suggesting it’s in my daughter’s best interest to roll back? The laws that keep her from being raped by her future spouse? The legal right to leave her marriage? The right to have medical treatment without her husband’s permission? Truly what am I supposed to be worrying about for her?


Did the PP ever respond to these questions?


Of course not, because its easier to complain about feminism when you don’t have to deal with facts and can just make vague assertions of doom.


Vague assertions of doom? What planet do you all live on where the future is bright?


Oh good you're still here! Could you tell me which parts of the future will be brighter for my daughter if her husband can rape her at will? If she needs his permission for lifesaving medical care? Or if she can’t have a credit card without his signature?


Your daughter won't get married so it's really irrelevant this fake rape scenario. Our daughters will all be single, working their fingers to the bone in a purposeless life, wondering what the point of life is.

You need to stop reading tradwife fanfiction by incels and comprehend that being a stay at home mom is extremely hard work -- except it thankless, with zero promotions, zero severance, zero sick days, zero pay, and zero protections from your stupid husband. What is this silly narrative that only paid employment is "working their fingers to the bone"?


Do tell us where all these eligible bachelors will be found in the future! On college campuses? Where?

Are you mentally ill? Where did I mention eligible bachelors?


Then who will your daughter be marrying and potentially raped by? I've said all along she won't be getting married at all.

How exactly am I supposed to know what you have said "all along" on an anonymous forum? And how is your bizarre non sequitur even a response to what I wrote about the hardships of being a SAHM?


Who cares about SAHM? I know you don't. Feminists sure don't. But marriage as an institution is hanging on by a thread while people are patting themselves on the back for being a positive thing for relationships. Ok!


Don't you have some clothes to wash, asses to wipe? You are waaaayyyy out of your depth here.

All of you trad wives shit on feminism, until of course, your husbands cheat on you and you need to enjoy all of the protections that feminism affords you.


Your husbands? What about yours? Are you even in a relationship?


Because I need a husband in order to be credible? BAHAHAHAHAHAAHA


Where did you get your expertise on relationships?


I'm a woman and a feminist. My relationship status is irrelevant. But how unsurprising that a trad wife can only see herself through the eyes of her husband. Please make sure you stay with him if he cheats, beats you, or abuses you financially. Those benefits we enjoy after fighting for them are not for you.


Go pet your cats. You don't know anything about relationships.


Oh honey, you are so sad. You don't even understand most of what is being discussed here. Go bake something.


Not that it matters but my mom and dad have been together for 52 years (still going) and they're both feminists. My parents raised me to believe that being a woman shouldn't hold me back. And I have an awesome husband (15 years and counting) and kids as well as a career I love.

Don't make yourself small for other people.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Obviously it's a negative for relationships. That doesn't meant there aren't other positives. But for relationships, no. Now women don't need men and men don't need women.


Do you think relationships are better when they reflect “needs“? I think the fact that I don’t “need” my husband to support me financially, sign for any business deal I do, or give me permission for medical treatment makes our relationship much better. Is your hypothesis that in places where women do not have rights, relationship relationships are better? Because, at least a news reporting, there seem to be a lot of murders and suicides of women being abused.


The question one is it better for relationships. No. It's not. Men can get the sex they want by never marrying and women can support themselves and kids if they want them. Neither "needs" a relationship to get their needs met.


People should never need to be together. They should want to be together.


Except that was the point of the social contract between men and women that worked for eons. And now that's broken. Men can get sex whenever they want and women can support themselves. There really is no point to a relationship for most people. Soon there will be bots so men won't even need a real woman. You can decide if that's better or not.


I don't think this is true, because men as a group haven't done the work to become more balanced people, but women have. Men can't get sex whenever they want because it requires a woman to want to have sex with them (and women have more choice than ever now), and it seems like there are things a lot of men want and either can only get in relationships or vastly prefer to get them in relationships (kids, societal connections and belonging, stability, etc.). Women also seem to prefer getting these in relationships, though it seems on the whole, women who don't find marriage are better able to attain these things than men do.

I think of my BIL who is never married, quite bitter about it, and very lonely. He lacks a lot of social skills that would enable him to build and maintain friendships, doesn't really know how to make his home nice, and absolutely could not raise kids on his own. Then I think of the half dozen female friends I have who are also never married, but still have really lovely lives. They are financially stable and work to give their lives structure and meaning without a spouse. Several of them have had kids on their own and done a good job of figuring out how to make that work (often living near family to ensure greater stability, making enough to afford nannies and other supports to cover childcare gaps). Others instead focus on friendships, travel, and hobbies. They are all very happy. I think all of them would have been happy to marry IF they had found the right person at the right time, but they didn't and demonstrated a lot of resiliency in figuring out how to make it work for them anyway.

Meanwhile my BIL sits around angry at the world for not providing him with a wife to compensate for all his shortcomings. He wanted someone who would not only give him sex, but also children and create a comfortable home for him and manage his social life and cook his meals. He also would have needed a woman who would do all that while also earning an income, because he's a low earner who is often unemployed and would not have been able to support a family on his own. My MIL often laments his "bad luck" in not finding a partner but the truth is that I've never met a woman who would be willing to take all that on. He has had several lengthy and somewhat serious relationships but they don't last because he'll start out on his best behavior and then as he reveals himself to her, she realizes what she's taking on and leaves. One of his ex girlfriends was a single mom in her 40s -- she chose to stay a single mom rather than take on BIL as essentially a second dependent. More recently he dated a woman in her late 40s who never had kids and likely didn't have a ton of other romantic prospects. That one lasted two years but ultimately she decided she'd rather be alone than deal with BIL. And I've heard of other stories like this for other men. The women who reject them do fine even if it means being alone. The men don't.

The biggest problem with feminism is that some men have not stepped up to the plate and bettered themselves to make themselves worthy of women and marriage. When women have the choice to support themselves and be alone, it might not be their first choice but they can make it work and some even really enjoy it. And men suffer because before feminism, those women would have HAD to marry. Independence was not an option and they would have been really exposed and in danger of starvation or physical harm without a husband. That single mom especially would likely never have chosen to give up the protection of a husband, even one as burdensome as my BIL, because her prospects would have been so bad.

Feminism is a net positive for women in relationships because it has allowed us to choose, and offered us an alternative to marriage if we can't find a man we want to marry. For reasons I frankly don't understand, men have not seized the opportunity to make that same choice for themselves, and there are too many men (see the incel movement if you are looking for examples) still view access to women and a wife as a god-given right even though they've done nothing to earn the love of a woman.



+1000000000 YES


That's great that you keep telling us why women don't need men. But men don't need women either. If you think this is a plus for society then we'll have to agree to disagree. If you have children you might be wondering what the future will look like for them.


Which aspect of feminism are you suggesting it’s in my daughter’s best interest to roll back? The laws that keep her from being raped by her future spouse? The legal right to leave her marriage? The right to have medical treatment without her husband’s permission? Truly what am I supposed to be worrying about for her?


Did the PP ever respond to these questions?


Of course not, because its easier to complain about feminism when you don’t have to deal with facts and can just make vague assertions of doom.


Vague assertions of doom? What planet do you all live on where the future is bright?


Oh good you're still here! Could you tell me which parts of the future will be brighter for my daughter if her husband can rape her at will? If she needs his permission for lifesaving medical care? Or if she can’t have a credit card without his signature?


Your daughter won't get married so it's really irrelevant this fake rape scenario. Our daughters will all be single, working their fingers to the bone in a purposeless life, wondering what the point of life is.


OK so…why do you think her future is better if my husband has to sign for her credit card after she’s an adult?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
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Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Obviously it's a negative for relationships. That doesn't meant there aren't other positives. But for relationships, no. Now women don't need men and men don't need women.


Do you think relationships are better when they reflect “needs“? I think the fact that I don’t “need” my husband to support me financially, sign for any business deal I do, or give me permission for medical treatment makes our relationship much better. Is your hypothesis that in places where women do not have rights, relationship relationships are better? Because, at least a news reporting, there seem to be a lot of murders and suicides of women being abused.


The question one is it better for relationships. No. It's not. Men can get the sex they want by never marrying and women can support themselves and kids if they want them. Neither "needs" a relationship to get their needs met.


People should never need to be together. They should want to be together.


Except that was the point of the social contract between men and women that worked for eons. And now that's broken. Men can get sex whenever they want and women can support themselves. There really is no point to a relationship for most people. Soon there will be bots so men won't even need a real woman. You can decide if that's better or not.


I don't think this is true, because men as a group haven't done the work to become more balanced people, but women have. Men can't get sex whenever they want because it requires a woman to want to have sex with them (and women have more choice than ever now), and it seems like there are things a lot of men want and either can only get in relationships or vastly prefer to get them in relationships (kids, societal connections and belonging, stability, etc.). Women also seem to prefer getting these in relationships, though it seems on the whole, women who don't find marriage are better able to attain these things than men do.

I think of my BIL who is never married, quite bitter about it, and very lonely. He lacks a lot of social skills that would enable him to build and maintain friendships, doesn't really know how to make his home nice, and absolutely could not raise kids on his own. Then I think of the half dozen female friends I have who are also never married, but still have really lovely lives. They are financially stable and work to give their lives structure and meaning without a spouse. Several of them have had kids on their own and done a good job of figuring out how to make that work (often living near family to ensure greater stability, making enough to afford nannies and other supports to cover childcare gaps). Others instead focus on friendships, travel, and hobbies. They are all very happy. I think all of them would have been happy to marry IF they had found the right person at the right time, but they didn't and demonstrated a lot of resiliency in figuring out how to make it work for them anyway.

Meanwhile my BIL sits around angry at the world for not providing him with a wife to compensate for all his shortcomings. He wanted someone who would not only give him sex, but also children and create a comfortable home for him and manage his social life and cook his meals. He also would have needed a woman who would do all that while also earning an income, because he's a low earner who is often unemployed and would not have been able to support a family on his own. My MIL often laments his "bad luck" in not finding a partner but the truth is that I've never met a woman who would be willing to take all that on. He has had several lengthy and somewhat serious relationships but they don't last because he'll start out on his best behavior and then as he reveals himself to her, she realizes what she's taking on and leaves. One of his ex girlfriends was a single mom in her 40s -- she chose to stay a single mom rather than take on BIL as essentially a second dependent. More recently he dated a woman in her late 40s who never had kids and likely didn't have a ton of other romantic prospects. That one lasted two years but ultimately she decided she'd rather be alone than deal with BIL. And I've heard of other stories like this for other men. The women who reject them do fine even if it means being alone. The men don't.

The biggest problem with feminism is that some men have not stepped up to the plate and bettered themselves to make themselves worthy of women and marriage. When women have the choice to support themselves and be alone, it might not be their first choice but they can make it work and some even really enjoy it. And men suffer because before feminism, those women would have HAD to marry. Independence was not an option and they would have been really exposed and in danger of starvation or physical harm without a husband. That single mom especially would likely never have chosen to give up the protection of a husband, even one as burdensome as my BIL, because her prospects would have been so bad.

Feminism is a net positive for women in relationships because it has allowed us to choose, and offered us an alternative to marriage if we can't find a man we want to marry. For reasons I frankly don't understand, men have not seized the opportunity to make that same choice for themselves, and there are too many men (see the incel movement if you are looking for examples) still view access to women and a wife as a god-given right even though they've done nothing to earn the love of a woman.



+1000000000 YES


That's great that you keep telling us why women don't need men. But men don't need women either. If you think this is a plus for society then we'll have to agree to disagree. If you have children you might be wondering what the future will look like for them.


Which aspect of feminism are you suggesting it’s in my daughter’s best interest to roll back? The laws that keep her from being raped by her future spouse? The legal right to leave her marriage? The right to have medical treatment without her husband’s permission? Truly what am I supposed to be worrying about for her?


Did the PP ever respond to these questions?


Of course not, because its easier to complain about feminism when you don’t have to deal with facts and can just make vague assertions of doom.


Vague assertions of doom? What planet do you all live on where the future is bright?


Oh good you're still here! Could you tell me which parts of the future will be brighter for my daughter if her husband can rape her at will? If she needs his permission for lifesaving medical care? Or if she can’t have a credit card without his signature?


Your daughter won't get married so it's really irrelevant this fake rape scenario. Our daughters will all be single, working their fingers to the bone in a purposeless life, wondering what the point of life is.

You need to stop reading tradwife fanfiction by incels and comprehend that being a stay at home mom is extremely hard work -- except it thankless, with zero promotions, zero severance, zero sick days, zero pay, and zero protections from your stupid husband. What is this silly narrative that only paid employment is "working their fingers to the bone"?


Do tell us where all these eligible bachelors will be found in the future! On college campuses? Where?

Are you mentally ill? Where did I mention eligible bachelors?


Then who will your daughter be marrying and potentially raped by? I've said all along she won't be getting married at all.

How exactly am I supposed to know what you have said "all along" on an anonymous forum? And how is your bizarre non sequitur even a response to what I wrote about the hardships of being a SAHM?


Who cares about SAHM? I know you don't. Feminists sure don't. But marriage as an institution is hanging on by a thread while people are patting themselves on the back for being a positive thing for relationships. Ok!


Don't you have some clothes to wash, asses to wipe? You are waaaayyyy out of your depth here.

All of you trad wives shit on feminism, until of course, your husbands cheat on you and you need to enjoy all of the protections that feminism affords you.


Your husbands? What about yours? Are you even in a relationship?


Because I need a husband in order to be credible? BAHAHAHAHAHAAHA


Where did you get your expertise on relationships?


I'm a woman and a feminist. My relationship status is irrelevant. But how unsurprising that a trad wife can only see herself through the eyes of her husband. Please make sure you stay with him if he cheats, beats you, or abuses you financially. Those benefits we enjoy after fighting for them are not for you.


Go pet your cats. You don't know anything about relationships.


Oh honey, you are so sad. You don't even understand most of what is being discussed here. Go bake something.


DP. Do you both not find it weird that you're are trading in misogynistic tropes ("cat lady" and "get back in the kitchen") to take jabs at each other in a thread about feminism?

Sigh


You also do not understand what is being discussed if that's your takeaway. Maybe give it another read?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
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Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Obviously it's a negative for relationships. That doesn't meant there aren't other positives. But for relationships, no. Now women don't need men and men don't need women.


Do you think relationships are better when they reflect “needs“? I think the fact that I don’t “need” my husband to support me financially, sign for any business deal I do, or give me permission for medical treatment makes our relationship much better. Is your hypothesis that in places where women do not have rights, relationship relationships are better? Because, at least a news reporting, there seem to be a lot of murders and suicides of women being abused.


The question one is it better for relationships. No. It's not. Men can get the sex they want by never marrying and women can support themselves and kids if they want them. Neither "needs" a relationship to get their needs met.


People should never need to be together. They should want to be together.


Except that was the point of the social contract between men and women that worked for eons. And now that's broken. Men can get sex whenever they want and women can support themselves. There really is no point to a relationship for most people. Soon there will be bots so men won't even need a real woman. You can decide if that's better or not.


I don't think this is true, because men as a group haven't done the work to become more balanced people, but women have. Men can't get sex whenever they want because it requires a woman to want to have sex with them (and women have more choice than ever now), and it seems like there are things a lot of men want and either can only get in relationships or vastly prefer to get them in relationships (kids, societal connections and belonging, stability, etc.). Women also seem to prefer getting these in relationships, though it seems on the whole, women who don't find marriage are better able to attain these things than men do.

I think of my BIL who is never married, quite bitter about it, and very lonely. He lacks a lot of social skills that would enable him to build and maintain friendships, doesn't really know how to make his home nice, and absolutely could not raise kids on his own. Then I think of the half dozen female friends I have who are also never married, but still have really lovely lives. They are financially stable and work to give their lives structure and meaning without a spouse. Several of them have had kids on their own and done a good job of figuring out how to make that work (often living near family to ensure greater stability, making enough to afford nannies and other supports to cover childcare gaps). Others instead focus on friendships, travel, and hobbies. They are all very happy. I think all of them would have been happy to marry IF they had found the right person at the right time, but they didn't and demonstrated a lot of resiliency in figuring out how to make it work for them anyway.

Meanwhile my BIL sits around angry at the world for not providing him with a wife to compensate for all his shortcomings. He wanted someone who would not only give him sex, but also children and create a comfortable home for him and manage his social life and cook his meals. He also would have needed a woman who would do all that while also earning an income, because he's a low earner who is often unemployed and would not have been able to support a family on his own. My MIL often laments his "bad luck" in not finding a partner but the truth is that I've never met a woman who would be willing to take all that on. He has had several lengthy and somewhat serious relationships but they don't last because he'll start out on his best behavior and then as he reveals himself to her, she realizes what she's taking on and leaves. One of his ex girlfriends was a single mom in her 40s -- she chose to stay a single mom rather than take on BIL as essentially a second dependent. More recently he dated a woman in her late 40s who never had kids and likely didn't have a ton of other romantic prospects. That one lasted two years but ultimately she decided she'd rather be alone than deal with BIL. And I've heard of other stories like this for other men. The women who reject them do fine even if it means being alone. The men don't.

The biggest problem with feminism is that some men have not stepped up to the plate and bettered themselves to make themselves worthy of women and marriage. When women have the choice to support themselves and be alone, it might not be their first choice but they can make it work and some even really enjoy it. And men suffer because before feminism, those women would have HAD to marry. Independence was not an option and they would have been really exposed and in danger of starvation or physical harm without a husband. That single mom especially would likely never have chosen to give up the protection of a husband, even one as burdensome as my BIL, because her prospects would have been so bad.

Feminism is a net positive for women in relationships because it has allowed us to choose, and offered us an alternative to marriage if we can't find a man we want to marry. For reasons I frankly don't understand, men have not seized the opportunity to make that same choice for themselves, and there are too many men (see the incel movement if you are looking for examples) still view access to women and a wife as a god-given right even though they've done nothing to earn the love of a woman.



+1000000000 YES


That's great that you keep telling us why women don't need men. But men don't need women either. If you think this is a plus for society then we'll have to agree to disagree. If you have children you might be wondering what the future will look like for them.


Which aspect of feminism are you suggesting it’s in my daughter’s best interest to roll back? The laws that keep her from being raped by her future spouse? The legal right to leave her marriage? The right to have medical treatment without her husband’s permission? Truly what am I supposed to be worrying about for her?


Did the PP ever respond to these questions?


Of course not, because its easier to complain about feminism when you don’t have to deal with facts and can just make vague assertions of doom.


Vague assertions of doom? What planet do you all live on where the future is bright?


Oh good you're still here! Could you tell me which parts of the future will be brighter for my daughter if her husband can rape her at will? If she needs his permission for lifesaving medical care? Or if she can’t have a credit card without his signature?


Your daughter won't get married so it's really irrelevant this fake rape scenario. Our daughters will all be single, working their fingers to the bone in a purposeless life, wondering what the point of life is.

You need to stop reading tradwife fanfiction by incels and comprehend that being a stay at home mom is extremely hard work -- except it thankless, with zero promotions, zero severance, zero sick days, zero pay, and zero protections from your stupid husband. What is this silly narrative that only paid employment is "working their fingers to the bone"?


Do tell us where all these eligible bachelors will be found in the future! On college campuses? Where?

Are you mentally ill? Where did I mention eligible bachelors?


Then who will your daughter be marrying and potentially raped by? I've said all along she won't be getting married at all.

How exactly am I supposed to know what you have said "all along" on an anonymous forum? And how is your bizarre non sequitur even a response to what I wrote about the hardships of being a SAHM?


Who cares about SAHM? I know you don't. Feminists sure don't. But marriage as an institution is hanging on by a thread while people are patting themselves on the back for being a positive thing for relationships. Ok!


Don't you have some clothes to wash, asses to wipe? You are waaaayyyy out of your depth here.

All of you trad wives shit on feminism, until of course, your husbands cheat on you and you need to enjoy all of the protections that feminism affords you.


Your husbands? What about yours? Are you even in a relationship?


Because I need a husband in order to be credible? BAHAHAHAHAHAAHA


Where did you get your expertise on relationships?


I'm a woman and a feminist. My relationship status is irrelevant. But how unsurprising that a trad wife can only see herself through the eyes of her husband. Please make sure you stay with him if he cheats, beats you, or abuses you financially. Those benefits we enjoy after fighting for them are not for you.


Go pet your cats. You don't know anything about relationships.


Oh honey, you are so sad. You don't even understand most of what is being discussed here. Go bake something.


DP. Do you both not find it weird that you're are trading in misogynistic tropes ("cat lady" and "get back in the kitchen") to take jabs at each other in a thread about feminism?

Sigh


You also do not understand what is being discussed if that's your takeaway. Maybe give it another read?


How about you self reflect instead of retorting with this silly "you don't understand" reply as if you're some heightened intellect? You're not. You're getting off on trading misogynistic insults to win some stupid internet dispute, while simultaneously touting your feminist credentials. You look like a clown.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Obviously it's a negative for relationships. That doesn't meant there aren't other positives. But for relationships, no. Now women don't need men and men don't need women.


Do you think relationships are better when they reflect “needs“? I think the fact that I don’t “need” my husband to support me financially, sign for any business deal I do, or give me permission for medical treatment makes our relationship much better. Is your hypothesis that in places where women do not have rights, relationship relationships are better? Because, at least a news reporting, there seem to be a lot of murders and suicides of women being abused.


The question one is it better for relationships. No. It's not. Men can get the sex they want by never marrying and women can support themselves and kids if they want them. Neither "needs" a relationship to get their needs met.


People should never need to be together. They should want to be together.


Except that was the point of the social contract between men and women that worked for eons. And now that's broken. Men can get sex whenever they want and women can support themselves. There really is no point to a relationship for most people. Soon there will be bots so men won't even need a real woman. You can decide if that's better or not.


I don't think this is true, because men as a group haven't done the work to become more balanced people, but women have. Men can't get sex whenever they want because it requires a woman to want to have sex with them (and women have more choice than ever now), and it seems like there are things a lot of men want and either can only get in relationships or vastly prefer to get them in relationships (kids, societal connections and belonging, stability, etc.). Women also seem to prefer getting these in relationships, though it seems on the whole, women who don't find marriage are better able to attain these things than men do.

I think of my BIL who is never married, quite bitter about it, and very lonely. He lacks a lot of social skills that would enable him to build and maintain friendships, doesn't really know how to make his home nice, and absolutely could not raise kids on his own. Then I think of the half dozen female friends I have who are also never married, but still have really lovely lives. They are financially stable and work to give their lives structure and meaning without a spouse. Several of them have had kids on their own and done a good job of figuring out how to make that work (often living near family to ensure greater stability, making enough to afford nannies and other supports to cover childcare gaps). Others instead focus on friendships, travel, and hobbies. They are all very happy. I think all of them would have been happy to marry IF they had found the right person at the right time, but they didn't and demonstrated a lot of resiliency in figuring out how to make it work for them anyway.

Meanwhile my BIL sits around angry at the world for not providing him with a wife to compensate for all his shortcomings. He wanted someone who would not only give him sex, but also children and create a comfortable home for him and manage his social life and cook his meals. He also would have needed a woman who would do all that while also earning an income, because he's a low earner who is often unemployed and would not have been able to support a family on his own. My MIL often laments his "bad luck" in not finding a partner but the truth is that I've never met a woman who would be willing to take all that on. He has had several lengthy and somewhat serious relationships but they don't last because he'll start out on his best behavior and then as he reveals himself to her, she realizes what she's taking on and leaves. One of his ex girlfriends was a single mom in her 40s -- she chose to stay a single mom rather than take on BIL as essentially a second dependent. More recently he dated a woman in her late 40s who never had kids and likely didn't have a ton of other romantic prospects. That one lasted two years but ultimately she decided she'd rather be alone than deal with BIL. And I've heard of other stories like this for other men. The women who reject them do fine even if it means being alone. The men don't.

The biggest problem with feminism is that some men have not stepped up to the plate and bettered themselves to make themselves worthy of women and marriage. When women have the choice to support themselves and be alone, it might not be their first choice but they can make it work and some even really enjoy it. And men suffer because before feminism, those women would have HAD to marry. Independence was not an option and they would have been really exposed and in danger of starvation or physical harm without a husband. That single mom especially would likely never have chosen to give up the protection of a husband, even one as burdensome as my BIL, because her prospects would have been so bad.

Feminism is a net positive for women in relationships because it has allowed us to choose, and offered us an alternative to marriage if we can't find a man we want to marry. For reasons I frankly don't understand, men have not seized the opportunity to make that same choice for themselves, and there are too many men (see the incel movement if you are looking for examples) still view access to women and a wife as a god-given right even though they've done nothing to earn the love of a woman.



+1000000000 YES


That's great that you keep telling us why women don't need men. But men don't need women either. If you think this is a plus for society then we'll have to agree to disagree. If you have children you might be wondering what the future will look like for them.


Which aspect of feminism are you suggesting it’s in my daughter’s best interest to roll back? The laws that keep her from being raped by her future spouse? The legal right to leave her marriage? The right to have medical treatment without her husband’s permission? Truly what am I supposed to be worrying about for her?


Did the PP ever respond to these questions?


Of course not, because its easier to complain about feminism when you don’t have to deal with facts and can just make vague assertions of doom.


Vague assertions of doom? What planet do you all live on where the future is bright?


Oh good you're still here! Could you tell me which parts of the future will be brighter for my daughter if her husband can rape her at will? If she needs his permission for lifesaving medical care? Or if she can’t have a credit card without his signature?


Your daughter won't get married so it's really irrelevant this fake rape scenario. Our daughters will all be single, working their fingers to the bone in a purposeless life, wondering what the point of life is.


OK so…why do you think her future is better if my husband has to sign for her credit card after she’s an adult?


You can keep trying to make up new scenarios but the train has left the station. In the future, marriages will be rare and it will be every person for themselves. If you think that's great, then good for yuo.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Obviously it's a negative for relationships. That doesn't meant there aren't other positives. But for relationships, no. Now women don't need men and men don't need women.


Do you think relationships are better when they reflect “needs“? I think the fact that I don’t “need” my husband to support me financially, sign for any business deal I do, or give me permission for medical treatment makes our relationship much better. Is your hypothesis that in places where women do not have rights, relationship relationships are better? Because, at least a news reporting, there seem to be a lot of murders and suicides of women being abused.


The question one is it better for relationships. No. It's not. Men can get the sex they want by never marrying and women can support themselves and kids if they want them. Neither "needs" a relationship to get their needs met.


People should never need to be together. They should want to be together.


Except that was the point of the social contract between men and women that worked for eons. And now that's broken. Men can get sex whenever they want and women can support themselves. There really is no point to a relationship for most people. Soon there will be bots so men won't even need a real woman. You can decide if that's better or not.


I don't think this is true, because men as a group haven't done the work to become more balanced people, but women have. Men can't get sex whenever they want because it requires a woman to want to have sex with them (and women have more choice than ever now), and it seems like there are things a lot of men want and either can only get in relationships or vastly prefer to get them in relationships (kids, societal connections and belonging, stability, etc.). Women also seem to prefer getting these in relationships, though it seems on the whole, women who don't find marriage are better able to attain these things than men do.

I think of my BIL who is never married, quite bitter about it, and very lonely. He lacks a lot of social skills that would enable him to build and maintain friendships, doesn't really know how to make his home nice, and absolutely could not raise kids on his own. Then I think of the half dozen female friends I have who are also never married, but still have really lovely lives. They are financially stable and work to give their lives structure and meaning without a spouse. Several of them have had kids on their own and done a good job of figuring out how to make that work (often living near family to ensure greater stability, making enough to afford nannies and other supports to cover childcare gaps). Others instead focus on friendships, travel, and hobbies. They are all very happy. I think all of them would have been happy to marry IF they had found the right person at the right time, but they didn't and demonstrated a lot of resiliency in figuring out how to make it work for them anyway.

Meanwhile my BIL sits around angry at the world for not providing him with a wife to compensate for all his shortcomings. He wanted someone who would not only give him sex, but also children and create a comfortable home for him and manage his social life and cook his meals. He also would have needed a woman who would do all that while also earning an income, because he's a low earner who is often unemployed and would not have been able to support a family on his own. My MIL often laments his "bad luck" in not finding a partner but the truth is that I've never met a woman who would be willing to take all that on. He has had several lengthy and somewhat serious relationships but they don't last because he'll start out on his best behavior and then as he reveals himself to her, she realizes what she's taking on and leaves. One of his ex girlfriends was a single mom in her 40s -- she chose to stay a single mom rather than take on BIL as essentially a second dependent. More recently he dated a woman in her late 40s who never had kids and likely didn't have a ton of other romantic prospects. That one lasted two years but ultimately she decided she'd rather be alone than deal with BIL. And I've heard of other stories like this for other men. The women who reject them do fine even if it means being alone. The men don't.

The biggest problem with feminism is that some men have not stepped up to the plate and bettered themselves to make themselves worthy of women and marriage. When women have the choice to support themselves and be alone, it might not be their first choice but they can make it work and some even really enjoy it. And men suffer because before feminism, those women would have HAD to marry. Independence was not an option and they would have been really exposed and in danger of starvation or physical harm without a husband. That single mom especially would likely never have chosen to give up the protection of a husband, even one as burdensome as my BIL, because her prospects would have been so bad.

Feminism is a net positive for women in relationships because it has allowed us to choose, and offered us an alternative to marriage if we can't find a man we want to marry. For reasons I frankly don't understand, men have not seized the opportunity to make that same choice for themselves, and there are too many men (see the incel movement if you are looking for examples) still view access to women and a wife as a god-given right even though they've done nothing to earn the love of a woman.



+1000000000 YES


That's great that you keep telling us why women don't need men. But men don't need women either. If you think this is a plus for society then we'll have to agree to disagree. If you have children you might be wondering what the future will look like for them.


Which aspect of feminism are you suggesting it’s in my daughter’s best interest to roll back? The laws that keep her from being raped by her future spouse? The legal right to leave her marriage? The right to have medical treatment without her husband’s permission? Truly what am I supposed to be worrying about for her?


Did the PP ever respond to these questions?


Of course not, because its easier to complain about feminism when you don’t have to deal with facts and can just make vague assertions of doom.


Vague assertions of doom? What planet do you all live on where the future is bright?


Oh good you're still here! Could you tell me which parts of the future will be brighter for my daughter if her husband can rape her at will? If she needs his permission for lifesaving medical care? Or if she can’t have a credit card without his signature?


Your daughter won't get married so it's really irrelevant this fake rape scenario. Our daughters will all be single, working their fingers to the bone in a purposeless life, wondering what the point of life is.


OK so…why do you think her future is better if my husband has to sign for her credit card after she’s an adult?


You can keep trying to make up new scenarios but the train has left the station. In the future, marriages will be rare and it will be every person for themselves. If you think that's great, then good for yuo.


It’s not a new scenario, its the same scenario but I’m meeting you in your own apocalypse. If you roll back feminism, my daughter still doesn’t have legal rights. Why is that better?

And, why would her marriage prospects improve if she needed her husband’s signature on a credit card application? What is it about that you believe men find so appealing?
Anonymous
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Anonymous wrote:Obviously it's a negative for relationships. That doesn't meant there aren't other positives. But for relationships, no. Now women don't need men and men don't need women.


Do you think relationships are better when they reflect “needs“? I think the fact that I don’t “need” my husband to support me financially, sign for any business deal I do, or give me permission for medical treatment makes our relationship much better. Is your hypothesis that in places where women do not have rights, relationship relationships are better? Because, at least a news reporting, there seem to be a lot of murders and suicides of women being abused.


The question one is it better for relationships. No. It's not. Men can get the sex they want by never marrying and women can support themselves and kids if they want them. Neither "needs" a relationship to get their needs met.


People should never need to be together. They should want to be together.


Except that was the point of the social contract between men and women that worked for eons. And now that's broken. Men can get sex whenever they want and women can support themselves. There really is no point to a relationship for most people. Soon there will be bots so men won't even need a real woman. You can decide if that's better or not.


I don't think this is true, because men as a group haven't done the work to become more balanced people, but women have. Men can't get sex whenever they want because it requires a woman to want to have sex with them (and women have more choice than ever now), and it seems like there are things a lot of men want and either can only get in relationships or vastly prefer to get them in relationships (kids, societal connections and belonging, stability, etc.). Women also seem to prefer getting these in relationships, though it seems on the whole, women who don't find marriage are better able to attain these things than men do.

I think of my BIL who is never married, quite bitter about it, and very lonely. He lacks a lot of social skills that would enable him to build and maintain friendships, doesn't really know how to make his home nice, and absolutely could not raise kids on his own. Then I think of the half dozen female friends I have who are also never married, but still have really lovely lives. They are financially stable and work to give their lives structure and meaning without a spouse. Several of them have had kids on their own and done a good job of figuring out how to make that work (often living near family to ensure greater stability, making enough to afford nannies and other supports to cover childcare gaps). Others instead focus on friendships, travel, and hobbies. They are all very happy. I think all of them would have been happy to marry IF they had found the right person at the right time, but they didn't and demonstrated a lot of resiliency in figuring out how to make it work for them anyway.

Meanwhile my BIL sits around angry at the world for not providing him with a wife to compensate for all his shortcomings. He wanted someone who would not only give him sex, but also children and create a comfortable home for him and manage his social life and cook his meals. He also would have needed a woman who would do all that while also earning an income, because he's a low earner who is often unemployed and would not have been able to support a family on his own. My MIL often laments his "bad luck" in not finding a partner but the truth is that I've never met a woman who would be willing to take all that on. He has had several lengthy and somewhat serious relationships but they don't last because he'll start out on his best behavior and then as he reveals himself to her, she realizes what she's taking on and leaves. One of his ex girlfriends was a single mom in her 40s -- she chose to stay a single mom rather than take on BIL as essentially a second dependent. More recently he dated a woman in her late 40s who never had kids and likely didn't have a ton of other romantic prospects. That one lasted two years but ultimately she decided she'd rather be alone than deal with BIL. And I've heard of other stories like this for other men. The women who reject them do fine even if it means being alone. The men don't.

The biggest problem with feminism is that some men have not stepped up to the plate and bettered themselves to make themselves worthy of women and marriage. When women have the choice to support themselves and be alone, it might not be their first choice but they can make it work and some even really enjoy it. And men suffer because before feminism, those women would have HAD to marry. Independence was not an option and they would have been really exposed and in danger of starvation or physical harm without a husband. That single mom especially would likely never have chosen to give up the protection of a husband, even one as burdensome as my BIL, because her prospects would have been so bad.

Feminism is a net positive for women in relationships because it has allowed us to choose, and offered us an alternative to marriage if we can't find a man we want to marry. For reasons I frankly don't understand, men have not seized the opportunity to make that same choice for themselves, and there are too many men (see the incel movement if you are looking for examples) still view access to women and a wife as a god-given right even though they've done nothing to earn the love of a woman.



+1000000000 YES


That's great that you keep telling us why women don't need men. But men don't need women either. If you think this is a plus for society then we'll have to agree to disagree. If you have children you might be wondering what the future will look like for them.


Which aspect of feminism are you suggesting it’s in my daughter’s best interest to roll back? The laws that keep her from being raped by her future spouse? The legal right to leave her marriage? The right to have medical treatment without her husband’s permission? Truly what am I supposed to be worrying about for her?


Did the PP ever respond to these questions?


Of course not, because its easier to complain about feminism when you don’t have to deal with facts and can just make vague assertions of doom.


Vague assertions of doom? What planet do you all live on where the future is bright?


Oh good you're still here! Could you tell me which parts of the future will be brighter for my daughter if her husband can rape her at will? If she needs his permission for lifesaving medical care? Or if she can’t have a credit card without his signature?


Your daughter won't get married so it's really irrelevant this fake rape scenario. Our daughters will all be single, working their fingers to the bone in a purposeless life, wondering what the point of life is.

You need to stop reading tradwife fanfiction by incels and comprehend that being a stay at home mom is extremely hard work -- except it thankless, with zero promotions, zero severance, zero sick days, zero pay, and zero protections from your stupid husband. What is this silly narrative that only paid employment is "working their fingers to the bone"?


Do tell us where all these eligible bachelors will be found in the future! On college campuses? Where?

Are you mentally ill? Where did I mention eligible bachelors?


Then who will your daughter be marrying and potentially raped by? I've said all along she won't be getting married at all.

How exactly am I supposed to know what you have said "all along" on an anonymous forum? And how is your bizarre non sequitur even a response to what I wrote about the hardships of being a SAHM?


Who cares about SAHM? I know you don't. Feminists sure don't. But marriage as an institution is hanging on by a thread while people are patting themselves on the back for being a positive thing for relationships. Ok!


Don't you have some clothes to wash, asses to wipe? You are waaaayyyy out of your depth here.

All of you trad wives shit on feminism, until of course, your husbands cheat on you and you need to enjoy all of the protections that feminism affords you.


Your husbands? What about yours? Are you even in a relationship?


Because I need a husband in order to be credible? BAHAHAHAHAHAAHA


Where did you get your expertise on relationships?


I'm a woman and a feminist. My relationship status is irrelevant. But how unsurprising that a trad wife can only see herself through the eyes of her husband. Please make sure you stay with him if he cheats, beats you, or abuses you financially. Those benefits we enjoy after fighting for them are not for you.


Go pet your cats. You don't know anything about relationships.


Oh honey, you are so sad. You don't even understand most of what is being discussed here. Go bake something.


DP. Do you both not find it weird that you're are trading in misogynistic tropes ("cat lady" and "get back in the kitchen") to take jabs at each other in a thread about feminism?

Sigh


You also do not understand what is being discussed if that's your takeaway. Maybe give it another read?


How about you self reflect instead of retorting with this silly "you don't understand" reply as if you're some heightened intellect? You're not. You're getting off on trading misogynistic insults to win some stupid internet dispute, while simultaneously touting your feminist credentials. You look like a clown.


The only one who looks like a clown is you, since you clearly only saw the latest few exchanges and then proceeded to spew nonsense. Come back when you actually read what was being said, as i've stated before. If you don't want to do that, it's fine. Just refrain from commenting on anything I said.
Anonymous
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Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Obviously it's a negative for relationships. That doesn't meant there aren't other positives. But for relationships, no. Now women don't need men and men don't need women.


Do you think relationships are better when they reflect “needs“? I think the fact that I don’t “need” my husband to support me financially, sign for any business deal I do, or give me permission for medical treatment makes our relationship much better. Is your hypothesis that in places where women do not have rights, relationship relationships are better? Because, at least a news reporting, there seem to be a lot of murders and suicides of women being abused.


The question one is it better for relationships. No. It's not. Men can get the sex they want by never marrying and women can support themselves and kids if they want them. Neither "needs" a relationship to get their needs met.


People should never need to be together. They should want to be together.


Except that was the point of the social contract between men and women that worked for eons. And now that's broken. Men can get sex whenever they want and women can support themselves. There really is no point to a relationship for most people. Soon there will be bots so men won't even need a real woman. You can decide if that's better or not.


I don't think this is true, because men as a group haven't done the work to become more balanced people, but women have. Men can't get sex whenever they want because it requires a woman to want to have sex with them (and women have more choice than ever now), and it seems like there are things a lot of men want and either can only get in relationships or vastly prefer to get them in relationships (kids, societal connections and belonging, stability, etc.). Women also seem to prefer getting these in relationships, though it seems on the whole, women who don't find marriage are better able to attain these things than men do.

I think of my BIL who is never married, quite bitter about it, and very lonely. He lacks a lot of social skills that would enable him to build and maintain friendships, doesn't really know how to make his home nice, and absolutely could not raise kids on his own. Then I think of the half dozen female friends I have who are also never married, but still have really lovely lives. They are financially stable and work to give their lives structure and meaning without a spouse. Several of them have had kids on their own and done a good job of figuring out how to make that work (often living near family to ensure greater stability, making enough to afford nannies and other supports to cover childcare gaps). Others instead focus on friendships, travel, and hobbies. They are all very happy. I think all of them would have been happy to marry IF they had found the right person at the right time, but they didn't and demonstrated a lot of resiliency in figuring out how to make it work for them anyway.

Meanwhile my BIL sits around angry at the world for not providing him with a wife to compensate for all his shortcomings. He wanted someone who would not only give him sex, but also children and create a comfortable home for him and manage his social life and cook his meals. He also would have needed a woman who would do all that while also earning an income, because he's a low earner who is often unemployed and would not have been able to support a family on his own. My MIL often laments his "bad luck" in not finding a partner but the truth is that I've never met a woman who would be willing to take all that on. He has had several lengthy and somewhat serious relationships but they don't last because he'll start out on his best behavior and then as he reveals himself to her, she realizes what she's taking on and leaves. One of his ex girlfriends was a single mom in her 40s -- she chose to stay a single mom rather than take on BIL as essentially a second dependent. More recently he dated a woman in her late 40s who never had kids and likely didn't have a ton of other romantic prospects. That one lasted two years but ultimately she decided she'd rather be alone than deal with BIL. And I've heard of other stories like this for other men. The women who reject them do fine even if it means being alone. The men don't.

The biggest problem with feminism is that some men have not stepped up to the plate and bettered themselves to make themselves worthy of women and marriage. When women have the choice to support themselves and be alone, it might not be their first choice but they can make it work and some even really enjoy it. And men suffer because before feminism, those women would have HAD to marry. Independence was not an option and they would have been really exposed and in danger of starvation or physical harm without a husband. That single mom especially would likely never have chosen to give up the protection of a husband, even one as burdensome as my BIL, because her prospects would have been so bad.

Feminism is a net positive for women in relationships because it has allowed us to choose, and offered us an alternative to marriage if we can't find a man we want to marry. For reasons I frankly don't understand, men have not seized the opportunity to make that same choice for themselves, and there are too many men (see the incel movement if you are looking for examples) still view access to women and a wife as a god-given right even though they've done nothing to earn the love of a woman.



+1000000000 YES


That's great that you keep telling us why women don't need men. But men don't need women either. If you think this is a plus for society then we'll have to agree to disagree. If you have children you might be wondering what the future will look like for them.


Which aspect of feminism are you suggesting it’s in my daughter’s best interest to roll back? The laws that keep her from being raped by her future spouse? The legal right to leave her marriage? The right to have medical treatment without her husband’s permission? Truly what am I supposed to be worrying about for her?


Did the PP ever respond to these questions?


Of course not, because its easier to complain about feminism when you don’t have to deal with facts and can just make vague assertions of doom.


Vague assertions of doom? What planet do you all live on where the future is bright?


Oh good you're still here! Could you tell me which parts of the future will be brighter for my daughter if her husband can rape her at will? If she needs his permission for lifesaving medical care? Or if she can’t have a credit card without his signature?


Your daughter won't get married so it's really irrelevant this fake rape scenario. Our daughters will all be single, working their fingers to the bone in a purposeless life, wondering what the point of life is.


OK so…why do you think her future is better if my husband has to sign for her credit card after she’s an adult?


You can keep trying to make up new scenarios but the train has left the station. In the future, marriages will be rare and it will be every person for themselves. If you think that's great, then good for yuo.


DP, it's a hell of a lot better than women being second-class citizens and staying in abusive marriages because they have no other options.
Anonymous
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Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Obviously it's a negative for relationships. That doesn't meant there aren't other positives. But for relationships, no. Now women don't need men and men don't need women.


Do you think relationships are better when they reflect “needs“? I think the fact that I don’t “need” my husband to support me financially, sign for any business deal I do, or give me permission for medical treatment makes our relationship much better. Is your hypothesis that in places where women do not have rights, relationship relationships are better? Because, at least a news reporting, there seem to be a lot of murders and suicides of women being abused.


The question one is it better for relationships. No. It's not. Men can get the sex they want by never marrying and women can support themselves and kids if they want them. Neither "needs" a relationship to get their needs met.


People should never need to be together. They should want to be together.


Except that was the point of the social contract between men and women that worked for eons. And now that's broken. Men can get sex whenever they want and women can support themselves. There really is no point to a relationship for most people. Soon there will be bots so men won't even need a real woman. You can decide if that's better or not.


I don't think this is true, because men as a group haven't done the work to become more balanced people, but women have. Men can't get sex whenever they want because it requires a woman to want to have sex with them (and women have more choice than ever now), and it seems like there are things a lot of men want and either can only get in relationships or vastly prefer to get them in relationships (kids, societal connections and belonging, stability, etc.). Women also seem to prefer getting these in relationships, though it seems on the whole, women who don't find marriage are better able to attain these things than men do.

I think of my BIL who is never married, quite bitter about it, and very lonely. He lacks a lot of social skills that would enable him to build and maintain friendships, doesn't really know how to make his home nice, and absolutely could not raise kids on his own. Then I think of the half dozen female friends I have who are also never married, but still have really lovely lives. They are financially stable and work to give their lives structure and meaning without a spouse. Several of them have had kids on their own and done a good job of figuring out how to make that work (often living near family to ensure greater stability, making enough to afford nannies and other supports to cover childcare gaps). Others instead focus on friendships, travel, and hobbies. They are all very happy. I think all of them would have been happy to marry IF they had found the right person at the right time, but they didn't and demonstrated a lot of resiliency in figuring out how to make it work for them anyway.

Meanwhile my BIL sits around angry at the world for not providing him with a wife to compensate for all his shortcomings. He wanted someone who would not only give him sex, but also children and create a comfortable home for him and manage his social life and cook his meals. He also would have needed a woman who would do all that while also earning an income, because he's a low earner who is often unemployed and would not have been able to support a family on his own. My MIL often laments his "bad luck" in not finding a partner but the truth is that I've never met a woman who would be willing to take all that on. He has had several lengthy and somewhat serious relationships but they don't last because he'll start out on his best behavior and then as he reveals himself to her, she realizes what she's taking on and leaves. One of his ex girlfriends was a single mom in her 40s -- she chose to stay a single mom rather than take on BIL as essentially a second dependent. More recently he dated a woman in her late 40s who never had kids and likely didn't have a ton of other romantic prospects. That one lasted two years but ultimately she decided she'd rather be alone than deal with BIL. And I've heard of other stories like this for other men. The women who reject them do fine even if it means being alone. The men don't.

The biggest problem with feminism is that some men have not stepped up to the plate and bettered themselves to make themselves worthy of women and marriage. When women have the choice to support themselves and be alone, it might not be their first choice but they can make it work and some even really enjoy it. And men suffer because before feminism, those women would have HAD to marry. Independence was not an option and they would have been really exposed and in danger of starvation or physical harm without a husband. That single mom especially would likely never have chosen to give up the protection of a husband, even one as burdensome as my BIL, because her prospects would have been so bad.

Feminism is a net positive for women in relationships because it has allowed us to choose, and offered us an alternative to marriage if we can't find a man we want to marry. For reasons I frankly don't understand, men have not seized the opportunity to make that same choice for themselves, and there are too many men (see the incel movement if you are looking for examples) still view access to women and a wife as a god-given right even though they've done nothing to earn the love of a woman.



+1000000000 YES


That's great that you keep telling us why women don't need men. But men don't need women either. If you think this is a plus for society then we'll have to agree to disagree. If you have children you might be wondering what the future will look like for them.


Which aspect of feminism are you suggesting it’s in my daughter’s best interest to roll back? The laws that keep her from being raped by her future spouse? The legal right to leave her marriage? The right to have medical treatment without her husband’s permission? Truly what am I supposed to be worrying about for her?


Did the PP ever respond to these questions?


Of course not, because its easier to complain about feminism when you don’t have to deal with facts and can just make vague assertions of doom.


Vague assertions of doom? What planet do you all live on where the future is bright?


Oh good you're still here! Could you tell me which parts of the future will be brighter for my daughter if her husband can rape her at will? If she needs his permission for lifesaving medical care? Or if she can’t have a credit card without his signature?


Your daughter won't get married so it's really irrelevant this fake rape scenario. Our daughters will all be single, working their fingers to the bone in a purposeless life, wondering what the point of life is.

You need to stop reading tradwife fanfiction by incels and comprehend that being a stay at home mom is extremely hard work -- except it thankless, with zero promotions, zero severance, zero sick days, zero pay, and zero protections from your stupid husband. What is this silly narrative that only paid employment is "working their fingers to the bone"?


Do tell us where all these eligible bachelors will be found in the future! On college campuses? Where?

Are you mentally ill? Where did I mention eligible bachelors?


Then who will your daughter be marrying and potentially raped by? I've said all along she won't be getting married at all.

How exactly am I supposed to know what you have said "all along" on an anonymous forum? And how is your bizarre non sequitur even a response to what I wrote about the hardships of being a SAHM?


Who cares about SAHM? I know you don't. Feminists sure don't. But marriage as an institution is hanging on by a thread while people are patting themselves on the back for being a positive thing for relationships. Ok!


Don't you have some clothes to wash, asses to wipe? You are waaaayyyy out of your depth here.

All of you trad wives shit on feminism, until of course, your husbands cheat on you and you need to enjoy all of the protections that feminism affords you.


Your husbands? What about yours? Are you even in a relationship?


Because I need a husband in order to be credible? BAHAHAHAHAHAAHA


Where did you get your expertise on relationships?


I'm a woman and a feminist. My relationship status is irrelevant. But how unsurprising that a trad wife can only see herself through the eyes of her husband. Please make sure you stay with him if he cheats, beats you, or abuses you financially. Those benefits we enjoy after fighting for them are not for you.


Go pet your cats. You don't know anything about relationships.


Oh honey, you are so sad. You don't even understand most of what is being discussed here. Go bake something.


DP. Do you both not find it weird that you're are trading in misogynistic tropes ("cat lady" and "get back in the kitchen") to take jabs at each other in a thread about feminism?

Sigh


You also do not understand what is being discussed if that's your takeaway. Maybe give it another read?


How about you self reflect instead of retorting with this silly "you don't understand" reply as if you're some heightened intellect? You're not. You're getting off on trading misogynistic insults to win some stupid internet dispute, while simultaneously touting your feminist credentials. You look like a clown.


The only one who looks like a clown is you, since you clearly only saw the latest few exchanges and then proceeded to spew nonsense. Come back when you actually read what was being said, as i've stated before. If you don't want to do that, it's fine. Just refrain from commenting on anything I said.


Stop trying to justify your hypocrisy and do better. I will comment on what I please.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
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Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Obviously it's a negative for relationships. That doesn't meant there aren't other positives. But for relationships, no. Now women don't need men and men don't need women.


Do you think relationships are better when they reflect “needs“? I think the fact that I don’t “need” my husband to support me financially, sign for any business deal I do, or give me permission for medical treatment makes our relationship much better. Is your hypothesis that in places where women do not have rights, relationship relationships are better? Because, at least a news reporting, there seem to be a lot of murders and suicides of women being abused.


The question one is it better for relationships. No. It's not. Men can get the sex they want by never marrying and women can support themselves and kids if they want them. Neither "needs" a relationship to get their needs met.


People should never need to be together. They should want to be together.


Except that was the point of the social contract between men and women that worked for eons. And now that's broken. Men can get sex whenever they want and women can support themselves. There really is no point to a relationship for most people. Soon there will be bots so men won't even need a real woman. You can decide if that's better or not.


I don't think this is true, because men as a group haven't done the work to become more balanced people, but women have. Men can't get sex whenever they want because it requires a woman to want to have sex with them (and women have more choice than ever now), and it seems like there are things a lot of men want and either can only get in relationships or vastly prefer to get them in relationships (kids, societal connections and belonging, stability, etc.). Women also seem to prefer getting these in relationships, though it seems on the whole, women who don't find marriage are better able to attain these things than men do.

I think of my BIL who is never married, quite bitter about it, and very lonely. He lacks a lot of social skills that would enable him to build and maintain friendships, doesn't really know how to make his home nice, and absolutely could not raise kids on his own. Then I think of the half dozen female friends I have who are also never married, but still have really lovely lives. They are financially stable and work to give their lives structure and meaning without a spouse. Several of them have had kids on their own and done a good job of figuring out how to make that work (often living near family to ensure greater stability, making enough to afford nannies and other supports to cover childcare gaps). Others instead focus on friendships, travel, and hobbies. They are all very happy. I think all of them would have been happy to marry IF they had found the right person at the right time, but they didn't and demonstrated a lot of resiliency in figuring out how to make it work for them anyway.

Meanwhile my BIL sits around angry at the world for not providing him with a wife to compensate for all his shortcomings. He wanted someone who would not only give him sex, but also children and create a comfortable home for him and manage his social life and cook his meals. He also would have needed a woman who would do all that while also earning an income, because he's a low earner who is often unemployed and would not have been able to support a family on his own. My MIL often laments his "bad luck" in not finding a partner but the truth is that I've never met a woman who would be willing to take all that on. He has had several lengthy and somewhat serious relationships but they don't last because he'll start out on his best behavior and then as he reveals himself to her, she realizes what she's taking on and leaves. One of his ex girlfriends was a single mom in her 40s -- she chose to stay a single mom rather than take on BIL as essentially a second dependent. More recently he dated a woman in her late 40s who never had kids and likely didn't have a ton of other romantic prospects. That one lasted two years but ultimately she decided she'd rather be alone than deal with BIL. And I've heard of other stories like this for other men. The women who reject them do fine even if it means being alone. The men don't.

The biggest problem with feminism is that some men have not stepped up to the plate and bettered themselves to make themselves worthy of women and marriage. When women have the choice to support themselves and be alone, it might not be their first choice but they can make it work and some even really enjoy it. And men suffer because before feminism, those women would have HAD to marry. Independence was not an option and they would have been really exposed and in danger of starvation or physical harm without a husband. That single mom especially would likely never have chosen to give up the protection of a husband, even one as burdensome as my BIL, because her prospects would have been so bad.

Feminism is a net positive for women in relationships because it has allowed us to choose, and offered us an alternative to marriage if we can't find a man we want to marry. For reasons I frankly don't understand, men have not seized the opportunity to make that same choice for themselves, and there are too many men (see the incel movement if you are looking for examples) still view access to women and a wife as a god-given right even though they've done nothing to earn the love of a woman.



+1000000000 YES


That's great that you keep telling us why women don't need men. But men don't need women either. If you think this is a plus for society then we'll have to agree to disagree. If you have children you might be wondering what the future will look like for them.


Which aspect of feminism are you suggesting it’s in my daughter’s best interest to roll back? The laws that keep her from being raped by her future spouse? The legal right to leave her marriage? The right to have medical treatment without her husband’s permission? Truly what am I supposed to be worrying about for her?


Did the PP ever respond to these questions?


Of course not, because its easier to complain about feminism when you don’t have to deal with facts and can just make vague assertions of doom.


Vague assertions of doom? What planet do you all live on where the future is bright?


Oh good you're still here! Could you tell me which parts of the future will be brighter for my daughter if her husband can rape her at will? If she needs his permission for lifesaving medical care? Or if she can’t have a credit card without his signature?


Your daughter won't get married so it's really irrelevant this fake rape scenario. Our daughters will all be single, working their fingers to the bone in a purposeless life, wondering what the point of life is.


OK so…why do you think her future is better if my husband has to sign for her credit card after she’s an adult?


You can keep trying to make up new scenarios but the train has left the station. In the future, marriages will be rare and it will be every person for themselves. If you think that's great, then good for yuo.


It’s not a new scenario, its the same scenario but I’m meeting you in your own apocalypse. If you roll back feminism, my daughter still doesn’t have legal rights. Why is that better?

And, why would her marriage prospects improve if she needed her husband’s signature on a credit card application? What is it about that you believe men find so appealing?


If you're not able to discuss unintended consequences of feminism then you're not really having a good faith conversation.
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Anonymous wrote:Obviously it's a negative for relationships. That doesn't meant there aren't other positives. But for relationships, no. Now women don't need men and men don't need women.


Do you think relationships are better when they reflect “needs“? I think the fact that I don’t “need” my husband to support me financially, sign for any business deal I do, or give me permission for medical treatment makes our relationship much better. Is your hypothesis that in places where women do not have rights, relationship relationships are better? Because, at least a news reporting, there seem to be a lot of murders and suicides of women being abused.


The question one is it better for relationships. No. It's not. Men can get the sex they want by never marrying and women can support themselves and kids if they want them. Neither "needs" a relationship to get their needs met.


People should never need to be together. They should want to be together.


Except that was the point of the social contract between men and women that worked for eons. And now that's broken. Men can get sex whenever they want and women can support themselves. There really is no point to a relationship for most people. Soon there will be bots so men won't even need a real woman. You can decide if that's better or not.


I don't think this is true, because men as a group haven't done the work to become more balanced people, but women have. Men can't get sex whenever they want because it requires a woman to want to have sex with them (and women have more choice than ever now), and it seems like there are things a lot of men want and either can only get in relationships or vastly prefer to get them in relationships (kids, societal connections and belonging, stability, etc.). Women also seem to prefer getting these in relationships, though it seems on the whole, women who don't find marriage are better able to attain these things than men do.

I think of my BIL who is never married, quite bitter about it, and very lonely. He lacks a lot of social skills that would enable him to build and maintain friendships, doesn't really know how to make his home nice, and absolutely could not raise kids on his own. Then I think of the half dozen female friends I have who are also never married, but still have really lovely lives. They are financially stable and work to give their lives structure and meaning without a spouse. Several of them have had kids on their own and done a good job of figuring out how to make that work (often living near family to ensure greater stability, making enough to afford nannies and other supports to cover childcare gaps). Others instead focus on friendships, travel, and hobbies. They are all very happy. I think all of them would have been happy to marry IF they had found the right person at the right time, but they didn't and demonstrated a lot of resiliency in figuring out how to make it work for them anyway.

Meanwhile my BIL sits around angry at the world for not providing him with a wife to compensate for all his shortcomings. He wanted someone who would not only give him sex, but also children and create a comfortable home for him and manage his social life and cook his meals. He also would have needed a woman who would do all that while also earning an income, because he's a low earner who is often unemployed and would not have been able to support a family on his own. My MIL often laments his "bad luck" in not finding a partner but the truth is that I've never met a woman who would be willing to take all that on. He has had several lengthy and somewhat serious relationships but they don't last because he'll start out on his best behavior and then as he reveals himself to her, she realizes what she's taking on and leaves. One of his ex girlfriends was a single mom in her 40s -- she chose to stay a single mom rather than take on BIL as essentially a second dependent. More recently he dated a woman in her late 40s who never had kids and likely didn't have a ton of other romantic prospects. That one lasted two years but ultimately she decided she'd rather be alone than deal with BIL. And I've heard of other stories like this for other men. The women who reject them do fine even if it means being alone. The men don't.

The biggest problem with feminism is that some men have not stepped up to the plate and bettered themselves to make themselves worthy of women and marriage. When women have the choice to support themselves and be alone, it might not be their first choice but they can make it work and some even really enjoy it. And men suffer because before feminism, those women would have HAD to marry. Independence was not an option and they would have been really exposed and in danger of starvation or physical harm without a husband. That single mom especially would likely never have chosen to give up the protection of a husband, even one as burdensome as my BIL, because her prospects would have been so bad.

Feminism is a net positive for women in relationships because it has allowed us to choose, and offered us an alternative to marriage if we can't find a man we want to marry. For reasons I frankly don't understand, men have not seized the opportunity to make that same choice for themselves, and there are too many men (see the incel movement if you are looking for examples) still view access to women and a wife as a god-given right even though they've done nothing to earn the love of a woman.



+1000000000 YES


That's great that you keep telling us why women don't need men. But men don't need women either. If you think this is a plus for society then we'll have to agree to disagree. If you have children you might be wondering what the future will look like for them.


Which aspect of feminism are you suggesting it’s in my daughter’s best interest to roll back? The laws that keep her from being raped by her future spouse? The legal right to leave her marriage? The right to have medical treatment without her husband’s permission? Truly what am I supposed to be worrying about for her?


Did the PP ever respond to these questions?


Of course not, because its easier to complain about feminism when you don’t have to deal with facts and can just make vague assertions of doom.


Vague assertions of doom? What planet do you all live on where the future is bright?


Oh good you're still here! Could you tell me which parts of the future will be brighter for my daughter if her husband can rape her at will? If she needs his permission for lifesaving medical care? Or if she can’t have a credit card without his signature?


Your daughter won't get married so it's really irrelevant this fake rape scenario. Our daughters will all be single, working their fingers to the bone in a purposeless life, wondering what the point of life is.

You need to stop reading tradwife fanfiction by incels and comprehend that being a stay at home mom is extremely hard work -- except it thankless, with zero promotions, zero severance, zero sick days, zero pay, and zero protections from your stupid husband. What is this silly narrative that only paid employment is "working their fingers to the bone"?


Do tell us where all these eligible bachelors will be found in the future! On college campuses? Where?

Are you mentally ill? Where did I mention eligible bachelors?


Then who will your daughter be marrying and potentially raped by? I've said all along she won't be getting married at all.

How exactly am I supposed to know what you have said "all along" on an anonymous forum? And how is your bizarre non sequitur even a response to what I wrote about the hardships of being a SAHM?


Who cares about SAHM? I know you don't. Feminists sure don't. But marriage as an institution is hanging on by a thread while people are patting themselves on the back for being a positive thing for relationships. Ok!


Don't you have some clothes to wash, asses to wipe? You are waaaayyyy out of your depth here.

All of you trad wives shit on feminism, until of course, your husbands cheat on you and you need to enjoy all of the protections that feminism affords you.


Your husbands? What about yours? Are you even in a relationship?


Because I need a husband in order to be credible? BAHAHAHAHAHAAHA


Where did you get your expertise on relationships?


I'm a woman and a feminist. My relationship status is irrelevant. But how unsurprising that a trad wife can only see herself through the eyes of her husband. Please make sure you stay with him if he cheats, beats you, or abuses you financially. Those benefits we enjoy after fighting for them are not for you.


Go pet your cats. You don't know anything about relationships.


Oh honey, you are so sad. You don't even understand most of what is being discussed here. Go bake something.


DP. Do you both not find it weird that you're are trading in misogynistic tropes ("cat lady" and "get back in the kitchen") to take jabs at each other in a thread about feminism?

Sigh


You also do not understand what is being discussed if that's your takeaway. Maybe give it another read?


How about you self reflect instead of retorting with this silly "you don't understand" reply as if you're some heightened intellect? You're not. You're getting off on trading misogynistic insults to win some stupid internet dispute, while simultaneously touting your feminist credentials. You look like a clown.


The only one who looks like a clown is you, since you clearly only saw the latest few exchanges and then proceeded to spew nonsense. Come back when you actually read what was being said, as i've stated before. If you don't want to do that, it's fine. Just refrain from commenting on anything I said.


Stop trying to justify your hypocrisy and do better. I will comment on what I please.


Just know that you look like a damn fool making comments on something you clearly didn't bother reading, much less understanding.
Anonymous
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Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Obviously it's a negative for relationships. That doesn't meant there aren't other positives. But for relationships, no. Now women don't need men and men don't need women.


Do you think relationships are better when they reflect “needs“? I think the fact that I don’t “need” my husband to support me financially, sign for any business deal I do, or give me permission for medical treatment makes our relationship much better. Is your hypothesis that in places where women do not have rights, relationship relationships are better? Because, at least a news reporting, there seem to be a lot of murders and suicides of women being abused.


The question one is it better for relationships. No. It's not. Men can get the sex they want by never marrying and women can support themselves and kids if they want them. Neither "needs" a relationship to get their needs met.


People should never need to be together. They should want to be together.


Except that was the point of the social contract between men and women that worked for eons. And now that's broken. Men can get sex whenever they want and women can support themselves. There really is no point to a relationship for most people. Soon there will be bots so men won't even need a real woman. You can decide if that's better or not.


I don't think this is true, because men as a group haven't done the work to become more balanced people, but women have. Men can't get sex whenever they want because it requires a woman to want to have sex with them (and women have more choice than ever now), and it seems like there are things a lot of men want and either can only get in relationships or vastly prefer to get them in relationships (kids, societal connections and belonging, stability, etc.). Women also seem to prefer getting these in relationships, though it seems on the whole, women who don't find marriage are better able to attain these things than men do.

I think of my BIL who is never married, quite bitter about it, and very lonely. He lacks a lot of social skills that would enable him to build and maintain friendships, doesn't really know how to make his home nice, and absolutely could not raise kids on his own. Then I think of the half dozen female friends I have who are also never married, but still have really lovely lives. They are financially stable and work to give their lives structure and meaning without a spouse. Several of them have had kids on their own and done a good job of figuring out how to make that work (often living near family to ensure greater stability, making enough to afford nannies and other supports to cover childcare gaps). Others instead focus on friendships, travel, and hobbies. They are all very happy. I think all of them would have been happy to marry IF they had found the right person at the right time, but they didn't and demonstrated a lot of resiliency in figuring out how to make it work for them anyway.

Meanwhile my BIL sits around angry at the world for not providing him with a wife to compensate for all his shortcomings. He wanted someone who would not only give him sex, but also children and create a comfortable home for him and manage his social life and cook his meals. He also would have needed a woman who would do all that while also earning an income, because he's a low earner who is often unemployed and would not have been able to support a family on his own. My MIL often laments his "bad luck" in not finding a partner but the truth is that I've never met a woman who would be willing to take all that on. He has had several lengthy and somewhat serious relationships but they don't last because he'll start out on his best behavior and then as he reveals himself to her, she realizes what she's taking on and leaves. One of his ex girlfriends was a single mom in her 40s -- she chose to stay a single mom rather than take on BIL as essentially a second dependent. More recently he dated a woman in her late 40s who never had kids and likely didn't have a ton of other romantic prospects. That one lasted two years but ultimately she decided she'd rather be alone than deal with BIL. And I've heard of other stories like this for other men. The women who reject them do fine even if it means being alone. The men don't.

The biggest problem with feminism is that some men have not stepped up to the plate and bettered themselves to make themselves worthy of women and marriage. When women have the choice to support themselves and be alone, it might not be their first choice but they can make it work and some even really enjoy it. And men suffer because before feminism, those women would have HAD to marry. Independence was not an option and they would have been really exposed and in danger of starvation or physical harm without a husband. That single mom especially would likely never have chosen to give up the protection of a husband, even one as burdensome as my BIL, because her prospects would have been so bad.

Feminism is a net positive for women in relationships because it has allowed us to choose, and offered us an alternative to marriage if we can't find a man we want to marry. For reasons I frankly don't understand, men have not seized the opportunity to make that same choice for themselves, and there are too many men (see the incel movement if you are looking for examples) still view access to women and a wife as a god-given right even though they've done nothing to earn the love of a woman.



+1000000000 YES


That's great that you keep telling us why women don't need men. But men don't need women either. If you think this is a plus for society then we'll have to agree to disagree. If you have children you might be wondering what the future will look like for them.


Which aspect of feminism are you suggesting it’s in my daughter’s best interest to roll back? The laws that keep her from being raped by her future spouse? The legal right to leave her marriage? The right to have medical treatment without her husband’s permission? Truly what am I supposed to be worrying about for her?


Did the PP ever respond to these questions?


Of course not, because its easier to complain about feminism when you don’t have to deal with facts and can just make vague assertions of doom.


Vague assertions of doom? What planet do you all live on where the future is bright?


Oh good you're still here! Could you tell me which parts of the future will be brighter for my daughter if her husband can rape her at will? If she needs his permission for lifesaving medical care? Or if she can’t have a credit card without his signature?


Your daughter won't get married so it's really irrelevant this fake rape scenario. Our daughters will all be single, working their fingers to the bone in a purposeless life, wondering what the point of life is.

You need to stop reading tradwife fanfiction by incels and comprehend that being a stay at home mom is extremely hard work -- except it thankless, with zero promotions, zero severance, zero sick days, zero pay, and zero protections from your stupid husband. What is this silly narrative that only paid employment is "working their fingers to the bone"?


Do tell us where all these eligible bachelors will be found in the future! On college campuses? Where?

Are you mentally ill? Where did I mention eligible bachelors?


Then who will your daughter be marrying and potentially raped by? I've said all along she won't be getting married at all.

How exactly am I supposed to know what you have said "all along" on an anonymous forum? And how is your bizarre non sequitur even a response to what I wrote about the hardships of being a SAHM?


Who cares about SAHM? I know you don't. Feminists sure don't. But marriage as an institution is hanging on by a thread while people are patting themselves on the back for being a positive thing for relationships. Ok!


Don't you have some clothes to wash, asses to wipe? You are waaaayyyy out of your depth here.

All of you trad wives shit on feminism, until of course, your husbands cheat on you and you need to enjoy all of the protections that feminism affords you.


Your husbands? What about yours? Are you even in a relationship?


Because I need a husband in order to be credible? BAHAHAHAHAHAAHA


Where did you get your expertise on relationships?


I'm a woman and a feminist. My relationship status is irrelevant. But how unsurprising that a trad wife can only see herself through the eyes of her husband. Please make sure you stay with him if he cheats, beats you, or abuses you financially. Those benefits we enjoy after fighting for them are not for you.


Go pet your cats. You don't know anything about relationships.


Oh honey, you are so sad. You don't even understand most of what is being discussed here. Go bake something.


DP. Do you both not find it weird that you're are trading in misogynistic tropes ("cat lady" and "get back in the kitchen") to take jabs at each other in a thread about feminism?

Sigh


You also do not understand what is being discussed if that's your takeaway. Maybe give it another read?


How about you self reflect instead of retorting with this silly "you don't understand" reply as if you're some heightened intellect? You're not. You're getting off on trading misogynistic insults to win some stupid internet dispute, while simultaneously touting your feminist credentials. You look like a clown.


The only one who looks like a clown is you, since you clearly only saw the latest few exchanges and then proceeded to spew nonsense. Come back when you actually read what was being said, as i've stated before. If you don't want to do that, it's fine. Just refrain from commenting on anything I said.


Stop trying to justify your hypocrisy and do better. I will comment on what I please.


Just know that you look like a damn fool making comments on something you clearly didn't bother reading, much less understanding.


Here we go with the "you don't understand" nonsense again

Don't flatter yourself.
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