Do you think feminism has been a net positive or net negative for relationships?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My experience is that the men who prattle on about traditional gender roles don't have the income to actually support a family. So what they actually want is a wife who works and does all the housework and childcare.

So these men don't want true traditional gender roles, they want to be big man babies.

And when they’re divorced they whine ENDLESSLY about child support.

[Anonymous]

Don't know, don't care. I have no time or energy for a relationship with someone who does not consider me his equal.

[Anonymous]

Unfortunately, most men are lacking. Marriage to one of them was easier to accept when they brought something to the table that you didn’t, namely money.

Now I can earn plenty of money and don’t really need a man so it’s more difficult to accept my DH’s many shortcomings.

I’m especially resentful I have to do most stuff for kids but I have a demanding job too. It makes me regret marriage and kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:One argument against feminism is that it has damaged the family structure. By getting rid of traditional gender roles, it has caused confusion about roles, placed unrealistic expectations on women, and pushed men away, all while prioritizing personal goals over family stability.

I mean it is *an* argument, just not a good one.

+1

More like fiction

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do think there are some positives, but I worry it’s pushed women to prioritize careers over marriage and children.

Interesting how it's always "is it bad to treat women as fully human?" and never "what could we do to make men and women both prioritize their families and communities?"

Right?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My experience is that the men who prattle on about traditional gender roles don't have the income to actually support a family. So what they actually want is a wife who works and does all the housework and childcare.

So these men don't want true traditional gender roles, they want to be big man babies.

Ha! My xH was exactly like this. I paid about 70% of the bills because he needed to spend his money on “hobbies” to be happy. But then when I asked him to help around the house because I did literally everything, he’d complain how “women today” don’t cook and clean.

Funny thing is he went around telling everyone he was such a feminist because…..he supported sex workers.

[Anonymous]

Women have almost always worked outside the home. Took in washing and farmer and did kitchen gardens and made cheese to sell etc etc. They just couldn't own land or have their own assets and money and had to have men as heads of household (husbands or fathers or brothers). Women who can earn their own living are "dangerous" as they won't be subjugated to men's desires and birth control means they can have children on their own timeline.

[Anonymous]

I think society adjusted to the idea of women having careers without ever fully expecting men to pick up more of the traditional work women did before careers were the norm all while men started slacking in education and ambition and are typically no longer able to support a family. It feels like we lost our choices as much as we gained them.

[Anonymous]

Negative. Feminism has moved from equal opportunity to we are all the same. It is creating confused and weak men or removing men completely from the family. That is bad in my opinion.

Women should not be considered property and should be treated with respect. Same goes for men.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:One argument against feminism is that it has damaged the family structure. By getting rid of traditional gender roles, it has caused confusion about roles, placed unrealistic expectations on women, and pushed men away, all while prioritizing personal goals over family stability.

My DH and I have no confusion about roles. Our roles are to provide each other with emotional support and companionship, raise our children, and earn money to support our family. Our family is quite stable and no one is "pushed away." Both DH and I have personal goals, but they are never more important than our children or each other.

DH and I have been married for 25 years, with both of us WOH for all but 1 year and me out-earning him for much of that time, considerably in recent years. Interestingly, DH's brother and sister both had more traditional marriages (SAHM and WOHF) and both are divorced now.¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[Anonymous]

Positive because we have multiple generations of men who were raised in homes with no dad!

There was a husband and he went to work and he came home and he ate his dinner and then he read the paper and watch TV but he never was a dad.

If you had a dad, congratulations but most people didn’t.

It’s time for men to step up at home and raise their children. The only way to do this is for women to work.

And if you want the lucky ones where your husband works and acts like a wife and parent when he gets home congratulations.

I was lucky and many respects though, and I understand that everybody cant do it this way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For me it’s been an absolute net positive. It helped me to open my eyes to how lame so many men are, and how they aren’t worth my time. Once my eyes were opened there was no turning back. No amount of propaganda in the world will turn me back. Call me a bitter old cat lady all you want. I could care less.

I live a life filled with peace and contentment. I go where I want to go, when I want to go. I have an amazing career that brings me job and pays big bucks. It’s an area that’s supposed to for men. But so what…. I like money too. I have fabulous group of friends, a beloved cat, and a boy toy to meet physical needs who I NEVER let live with me and start dirtying up my house.

Eh. I get where you’re coming from and I’ve met bitter women like you, you are going to believe what you’ve convinced yourself is true. But feminism and a high powered career and independence are not mutually exclusive. It’s about finding the right partner and building a life with them and still globetrotting, making money and climbing ranks. Oh and also having a family. You made a trade off that you felt you had to make at the time and have settled into a belief system now 20 years later. I may or may not have climbed as high as you did this is an anonymous board but I had my family while also having access to the corporate jet. Both are possible.

[Anonymous]

Also good for women and men that don’t wanna get married. There’s so many that never wanted to get married and they felt obligated to and that’s a train wreck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For me it’s been an absolute net positive. It helped me to open my eyes to how lame so many men are, and how they aren’t worth my time. Once my eyes were opened there was no turning back. No amount of propaganda in the world will turn me back. Call me a bitter old cat lady all you want. I could care less.

I live a life filled with peace and contentment. I go where I want to go, when I want to go. I have an amazing career that brings me job and pays big bucks. It’s an area that’s supposed to for men. But so what…. I like money too. I have fabulous group of friends, a beloved cat, and a boy toy to meet physical needs who I NEVER let live with me and start dirtying up my house.

Eh. I get where you’re coming from and I’ve met bitter women like you, you are going to believe what you’ve convinced yourself is true. But feminism and a high powered career and independence are not mutually exclusive. It’s about finding the right partner and building a life with them and still globetrotting, making money and climbing ranks. Oh and also having a family. You made a trade off that you felt you had to make at the time and have settled into a belief system now 20 years later. I may or may not have climbed as high as you did this is an anonymous board but I had my family while also having access to the corporate jet. Both are possible.

How about just career, and independence it’s not what you think it is when women have close friends.

Also they have families.

The reality is when man date they are competing against other men they are competing with peace.

[Anonymous]

Casual f buddy relationships? Yes, positive.