I feel like I won the parenting wars

[Anonymous]

Happy for OP's kid turning things around, but OP's post is insufferable. 1) It's self-congratulatory, 2) It's obnoxious gloating as to her siblings (and their children), and 3) It equates superior "winning" parenting with hyper helicoptering and college prestige. So, yes, let them crow. But we can find it very off putting.

[Anonymous]

I didn’t read all 19 pages but I will say this: anyone who thinks “game over” or “we won the war” when all that’s happened so far is their kid has gotten into a great college has a rude awakening ahead.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I didn’t read all 19 pages but I will say this: anyone who thinks “game over” or “we won the war” when all that’s happened so far is their kid has gotten into a great college has a rude awakening ahead.

Why do you say this? Students who get in unhooked, not TO, find themselves on track to do at least average if not better. Even if they end up "only"average, given that average is 3.75-3.9, many paths to T30-50 grad/med/law and tgreatcompanies await with that GPA from a top school. The top 10-25% of these students have a great shot at T10 grad/prof and MBB-level companies.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn’t read all 19 pages but I will say this: anyone who thinks “game over” or “we won the war” when all that’s happened so far is their kid has gotten into a great college has a rude awakening ahead.

Why do you say this? Students who get in unhooked, not TO, find themselves on track to do at least average if not better. Even if they end up "only"average, given that average is 3.75-3.9, many paths to T30-50 grad/med/law and tgreatcompanies await with that GPA from a top school. The top 10-25% of these students have a great shot at T10 grad/prof and MBB-level companies.

Because life is long and college is not the end game. Nor is grad/med/law/great company. There are many paths to success and more importantly, happiness and college is not the decider.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Happy for OP's kid turning things around, but OP's post is insufferable. 1) It's self-congratulatory, 2) It's obnoxious gloating as to her siblings (and their children), and 3) It equates superior "winning" parenting with hyper helicoptering and college prestige. So, yes, let them crow. But we can find it very off putting.

I think about OP’s post from time to time and completely agree with you, poster I quoted. Absolutely insufferable. Congratulations for being the absolute best OP! I wonder why your kid has anxiety and smokes and vapes? I bet you are miserable to be around.

[Anonymous]

Oh girl.... Just wait for college. I was a similar parent and our DC has struggled with Anxiety, drinking and lots of other issues at a top school. Don't count your chickens....

[Anonymous]

Oh lord, bless your heart OP.

I'm just thinking about that high achiever from my high school class who made it to a T20 and then got arrested during freshman year (felony, drug sale related) and ended up in a federal penitentary.

Or those two girls in my sorority who got pregnant and dropped out.

And the multiple girls I knew who developed horrible eating disorders, or the girl I know who woke up drugged and naked at a frat party (who knows what happened...)

But yeah, I guess you could celebrate now?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn’t read all 19 pages but I will say this: anyone who thinks “game over” or “we won the war” when all that’s happened so far is their kid has gotten into a great college has a rude awakening ahead.

Why do you say this? Students who get in unhooked, not TO, find themselves on track to do at least average if not better. Even if they end up "only"average, given that average is 3.75-3.9, many paths to T30-50 grad/med/law and tgreatcompanies await with that GPA from a top school. The top 10-25% of these students have a great shot at T10 grad/prof and MBB-level companies.

Are you an immigrant?
I think we can tell. You have no idea what is coming.....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Happy for OP's kid turning things around, but OP's post is insufferable. 1) It's self-congratulatory, 2) It's obnoxious gloating as to her siblings (and their children), and 3) It equates superior "winning" parenting with hyper helicoptering and college prestige. So, yes, let them crow. But we can find it very off putting.

I think about OP’s post from time to time and completely agree with you, poster I quoted. Absolutely insufferable. Congratulations for being the absolute best OP! I wonder why your kid has anxiety and smokes and vapes? I bet you are miserable to be around.

Nah, I get it, some kids are a roller coaster and require a lot of work. You may have an "easy" kid or 3, don't judge those that don't. I too feel like I won at least a minor victory getting my many-issues kid past the high school finish line and into a decent college that reflects his 36 ACT versus his eh grades due to various health (mental and otherwise) issues. You don't know until you've walk in those shoes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn’t read all 19 pages but I will say this: anyone who thinks “game over” or “we won the war” when all that’s happened so far is their kid has gotten into a great college has a rude awakening ahead.

Why do you say this? Students who get in unhooked, not TO, find themselves on track to do at least average if not better. Even if they end up "only"average, given that average is 3.75-3.9, many paths to T30-50 grad/med/law and tgreatcompanies await with that GPA from a top school. The top 10-25% of these students have a great shot at T10 grad/prof and MBB-level companies.

It’s crazy to me how some of you just see your kids as a jumble of acronyms and stats, and not individuals with real preferences and vulnerabilities.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn’t read all 19 pages but I will say this: anyone who thinks “game over” or “we won the war” when all that’s happened so far is their kid has gotten into a great college has a rude awakening ahead.

Why do you say this? Students who get in unhooked, not TO, find themselves on track to do at least average if not better. Even if they end up "only"average, given that average is 3.75-3.9, many paths to T30-50 grad/med/law and tgreatcompanies await with that GPA from a top school. The top 10-25% of these students have a great shot at T10 grad/prof and MBB-level companies.

Are you an immigrant?
I think we can tell. You have no idea what is coming.....

Definitely immigrant or first gen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn’t read all 19 pages but I will say this: anyone who thinks “game over” or “we won the war” when all that’s happened so far is their kid has gotten into a great college has a rude awakening ahead.

Why do you say this? Students who get in unhooked, not TO, find themselves on track to do at least average if not better. Even if they end up "only"average, given that average is 3.75-3.9, many paths to T30-50 grad/med/law and tgreatcompanies await with that GPA from a top school. The top 10-25% of these students have a great shot at T10 grad/prof and MBB-level companies.

Are you an immigrant?
I think we can tell. You have no idea what is coming.....

Definitely immigrant or first gen.

Yes, those are the parents who haven't typically had a regular American college experience themselves. They don't realize these kids are dealing with far more than academics during those tricky four years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Happy for OP's kid turning things around, but OP's post is insufferable. 1) It's self-congratulatory, 2) It's obnoxious gloating as to her siblings (and their children), and 3) It equates superior "winning" parenting with hyper helicoptering and college prestige. So, yes, let them crow. But we can find it very off putting.

+1 million. We know an independent college counselor who says that most of the kids who apply to transfer because they are unhappy are kids who got into their first choice "elite" college early and then realized that it wasn't a prize to win.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn’t read all 19 pages but I will say this: anyone who thinks “game over” or “we won the war” when all that’s happened so far is their kid has gotten into a great college has a rude awakening ahead.

Why do you say this? Students who get in unhooked, not TO, find themselves on track to do at least average if not better. Even if they end up "only"average, given that average is 3.75-3.9, many paths to T30-50 grad/med/law and tgreatcompanies await with that GPA from a top school. The top 10-25% of these students have a great shot at T10 grad/prof and MBB-level companies.

Are you an immigrant?
I think we can tell. You have no idea what is coming.....

Definitely immigrant or first gen.

Yes, those are the parents who haven't typically had a regular American college experience themselves. They don't realize these kids are dealing with far more than academics during those tricky four years.

Exactly. then their kid doesn't get into consulting clubs or the secret societies and comes back her to complain. then doesn't get MBB and has to settle for ZS and comes back to complain. See it ALL the time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn’t read all 19 pages but I will say this: anyone who thinks “game over” or “we won the war” when all that’s happened so far is their kid has gotten into a great college has a rude awakening ahead.

Why do you say this? Students who get in unhooked, not TO, find themselves on track to do at least average if not better. Even if they end up "only"average, given that average is 3.75-3.9, many paths to T30-50 grad/med/law and tgreatcompanies await with that GPA from a top school. The top 10-25% of these students have a great shot at T10 grad/prof and MBB-level companies.

Are you an immigrant?
I think we can tell. You have no idea what is coming.....

Definitely immigrant or first gen.

Yes, those are the parents who haven't typically had a regular American college experience themselves. They don't realize these kids are dealing with far more than academics during those tricky four years.

Exactly. then their kid doesn't get into consulting clubs or the secret societies and comes back her to complain. then doesn't get MBB and has to settle for ZS and comes back to complain. See it ALL the time.

lol.
ZS.....iykyk