PSA-Hoco

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:We all realize that these “kids” are almost full adults, right? And helicopter mommy is trying to make the world what she taught her kid it’d was instead of reality. Hard lesson that will take a long time to fix.

Actually that's incorrect. These kids are 14, 15. The amount of maturing that happens between those ages and being an "adult" is tremendous.

And part of maturing is dealing with your insecurities. If your 14-15 yr old wants to go to homecoming, encourage them to go. Either by themselves, with one friend, with two. Any combination works. They don’t need to be asked by anyone. Just go. It’s filled with hundreds of kids that when there, are all intermingled.

And would it be the end of the world if the people they are friends with asked them if they had plans? According to you, it is. Again, terrible parenting.

Have you talked to your daughter about why her “friends” never include her? There may be more going on behind the scenes.

Probably because your daughter iced her out for no reason.

Yes I’m sure my 11 yr old daughter did this.

Wow, a little off-topic, but you're 11 year old girl probably shouldn't be going to homecoming....

(joking....)

I have more than one kid but only 1 daughter. Trying to make this personal is bizarre. You did this! Your daughter did this!

FYI: 'NP' means new poster. That was not the person you were arguing with. It was someone trying to make a joke

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We all realize that these “kids” are almost full adults, right? And helicopter mommy is trying to make the world what she taught her kid it’d was instead of reality. Hard lesson that will take a long time to fix.

Actually that's incorrect. These kids are 14, 15. The amount of maturing that happens between those ages and being an "adult" is tremendous.

And part of maturing is dealing with your insecurities. If your 14-15 yr old wants to go to homecoming, encourage them to go. Either by themselves, with one friend, with two. Any combination works. They don’t need to be asked by anyone. Just go. It’s filled with hundreds of kids that when there, are all intermingled.

And would it be the end of the world if the people they are friends with asked them if they had plans? According to you, it is. Again, terrible parenting.

Have you talked to your daughter about why her “friends” never include her? There may be more going on behind the scenes.

Probably because your daughter iced her out for no reason.

Yes I’m sure my 11 yr old daughter did this.

Wow, a little off-topic, but you're 11 year old girl probably shouldn't be going to homecoming....

(joking....)

I have more than one kid but only 1 daughter. Trying to make this personal is bizarre. You did this! Your daughter did this!

FYI: 'NP' means new poster. That was not the person you were arguing with. It was someone trying to make a joke

I get the joke. It’s funny b/c the wild assumptions people are making just to continue their rants and insults are becoming comical.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We all realize that these “kids” are almost full adults, right? And helicopter mommy is trying to make the world what she taught her kid it’d was instead of reality. Hard lesson that will take a long time to fix.

Actually that's incorrect. These kids are 14, 15. The amount of maturing that happens between those ages and being an "adult" is tremendous.

And part of maturing is dealing with your insecurities. If your 14-15 yr old wants to go to homecoming, encourage them to go. Either by themselves, with one friend, with two. Any combination works. They don’t need to be asked by anyone. Just go. It’s filled with hundreds of kids that when there, are all intermingled.

And would it be the end of the world if the people they are friends with asked them if they had plans? According to you, it is. Again, terrible parenting.

DP. Of course it wouldn't be the end of the world.

This is an honest question. Are there kids out there whose *friends* aren't aware of what their plans are for every free moment? The reason I ask is that my DD knows what her friends are doing on weekends and evenings (so and so has a meet and will be gone the whole weekend, this other kid is going to a Quinceanera on Saturday, that one is going to the mall with her soccer friends, so on), never mind something like HoCo. Acquaintances, she sometimes knows, and sometimes not.

This is the larger point (and what OP doesnt want to accept). She may be "friendly" with other kids but she's not friends with them. Bc the friends (especially the girls) know what everyone else's plans are.

So expecting someone else to intervene is really a weird social mis-step because it would assume that they are better friends than they really are

I think you did just sum up the larger point, but not in a way that looks favorable on you to your kids. You’ll disagree, I know.

[Anonymous]

I don't read this post as suggesting that kids invite people they don't genuinely like or want to spend time with on some level - no one should do that, and it is ok to have boundaries and decide who you want to spend free time with. I think the point is to give some thought to whether there are kids you like spending time with in some capacity that need a group to go with.

[Anonymous]

^^ sorry, that was supposed to say “you or your kids”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't read this post as suggesting that kids invite people they don't genuinely like or want to spend time with on some level - no one should do that, and it is ok to have boundaries and decide who you want to spend free time with. I think the point is to give some thought to whether there are kids you like spending time with in some capacity that need a group to go with.

Bingo.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't read this post as suggesting that kids invite people they don't genuinely like or want to spend time with on some level - no one should do that, and it is ok to have boundaries and decide who you want to spend free time with. I think the point is to give some thought to whether there are kids you like spending time with in some capacity that need a group to go with.

This one gets it.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Hoco is important to some and it is sad that some kids don't feel that they can go because they haven't been included.

Life is hard and we don't have to tailor ourselves to your kids anxieties. That's THEIR problem, not ours.

So tired of being told I have to accommodate other people's dysfunction.

We already knew you were an ass. No need to come back and tell us over and over again.

NP, but is anyone else seeing the irony in the posters asking for kindness calling the other posters "ass"

Do F off. I don't owe you kindness when you come here and call kids who might be struggling socially at 14 and 15 dysfunctional. A kind thing to do, what I do, is to try to include them and show them they can be loved. I don't owe you a kindness for being an ass to them. So yes, you are an ASS. And you deserve to be called out for it.

+ 1.

+2

+3

[jsteele]

Probably time to put this thread to rest.