It’s shocking how many parents tell us (DINKS) we “did it right”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:G.d. This is a mean bunch of women.

This thread is a passive aggressive masterpiece isn’t it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The reactions of the parents in this spread demonstrate just how desperate they are to maintain the fairy tale that their lives weren't a series of huge mistakes.

You're not doing yourself or anyone else a favor by suppressing your true feelings about having kids. Young adults deserve to know the truth that having kids today is horrible, and it's likely to get worse.

Horrible? Marrying a college classmate and having kids in your 20s is the smartest and most fulfilling thing a young adult can do.

Dating apps, hookup culture, boozing through your 20s, marrying in your 30s with tons of mental baggage, and then needing IVF to have a kid has really screwed Americans up.

If the bolded is the recipe for a screwed-up person, then all of that must apply to you, because you certainly sound like a scared, reactionary, Luddite Boomer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:G.d. This is a mean bunch of women.

This thread is a passive aggressive masterpiece isn’t it?

The original post was passive agressive. The rest of the thread has devolved in to straight aggression. The posts here, with a few keywords swapped out, would be right at home on an incel forum.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I might say something like this without meaning it, because secretly I feel sorry for you and your empty life.

Or, you're just angry and bittter that settling and down and having a family is just 'something you do', like getting good grades and going to college. You never really gave it much thought. That's why it seems so frustrating for you when others around you choose to not have children because you didn't know that was an option. You didn't know you could be happy without having children.

So this! Like a pp said…sheep following sheep without much thought.

Ha! Most UMC folks here have put years of thought and planning into kids before they had them. Very few UMC families just have kids because it's the norm - in had a list and even planned the birth months.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Choosing to not have kids is certainly a choice one can make, and many more seem to be making. It’s working out great in Japan and Korea. Adults there seem to be very content and happy, and their countries seem to be progressing towards clean and depopulated eco-paradises. A lifetime of brunches, travel, and hobbies sure sounds great and very fulfilling.

Go for it! It sounds really shallow and superficial to me. Different strokes!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Be honest OP: you're really 33 and have another decade of fertility, and you're likely going to have children.

I wish the media/socials would stop overusing the word DINKs and limit it to the people who are truly DINKs for life. ie, they're 55 years old, or both partners have had tubal ligation/hysterectomy/vasectomy.

(yes, I know families can be formed in many ways and vasectomy can be reverse. but at least this is a tangible sign you're deeply committed rather than an attention seeking Gen Z)

I recently saw a reputable survey that said more than half of young women did not want to be parents, whereas more than half of young men wanted to be parents.

I know someone will ask me to post a link, but I don’t feel like searching for it . The point is that I found those data to be disturbing and also indicative of the fact that as a society, we make the experience of parenting much more appealing for men than for women (in 2024).

That makes zero sense because how would you really know how “appealing” parenting is unless you have done it. It’s just as likely that all of the hyperbolic rhetoric (like above) about how horrible things are for Moms gives young women a skewed sense of reality.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Choosing to not have kids is certainly a choice one can make, and many more seem to be making. It’s working out great in Japan and Korea. Adults there seem to be very content and happy, and their countries seem to be progressing towards clean and depopulated eco-paradises. A lifetime of brunches, travel, and hobbies sure sounds great and very fulfilling.

Go for it! It sounds really shallow and superficial to me. Different strokes!

You are intellectually dull enough that you missed the PP's sarcasm, and the fact that the PP is, in fact, making the same point you are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The reactions of the parents in this spread demonstrate just how desperate they are to maintain the fairy tale that their lives weren't a series of huge mistakes.

You're not doing yourself or anyone else a favor by suppressing your true feelings about having kids. Young adults deserve to know the truth that having kids today is horrible, and it's likely to get worse.

Horrible? Marrying a college classmate and having kids in your 20s is the smartest and most fulfilling thing a young adult can do.

Dating apps, hookup culture, boozing through your 20s, marrying in your 30s with tons of mental baggage, and then needing IVF to have a kid has really screwed Americans up.

How old are you?

No, that's called wasting your 20s and raising kids in poverty.

Your generation made it impossible to responsibly raise kids in your 20s.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:lol, yeah, ask alllllllll of those parents of school shooters just how ‘enriching’ having kids in their lives was. Or better yet, ask all of the victims’ family members how enriching other people having kids who went on to shootup schools was for them.


Massive loss of sleep
Massive financial drain
Massive amounts of stress
Potentially even huge legal troubles you’ll have to deal with


So, sooooo enriching. Not.

And these folks are on DCUM where this was posted?! Nope.

I'm still confused why this was posted on a forum for parents. The idea that OP wants to post here is very telling and sad. If she were so happy with her life she'd be brunching with her friends in an expensive restaurant, rather than writing about the kids she doesn't have to UMC women who are killing time until their kid is finished napping.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:lol, yeah, ask alllllllll of those parents of school shooters just how ‘enriching’ having kids in their lives was. Or better yet, ask all of the victims’ family members how enriching other people having kids who went on to shootup schools was for them.


Massive loss of sleep
Massive financial drain
Massive amounts of stress
Potentially even huge legal troubles you’ll have to deal with


So, sooooo enriching. Not.

And these folks are on DCUM where this was posted?! Nope.

I'm still confused why this was posted on a forum for parents. The idea that OP wants to post here is very telling and sad. If she were so happy with her life she'd be brunching with her friends in an expensive restaurant, rather than writing about the kids she doesn't have to UMC women who are killing time until their kid is finished napping.

So only UMC women whose kids are napping have downtime to kill? People like the OP don't have downtime to kill when they're sitting on the train? Why wouldn't she come to a forum that has parents on it to ask a question of parents? If a non-Mustang owner has a Mustang question, wouldn't a Mustang enthusiast forum be a good place to ask?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The reactions of the parents in this spread demonstrate just how desperate they are to maintain the fairy tale that their lives weren't a series of huge mistakes.

You're not doing yourself or anyone else a favor by suppressing your true feelings about having kids. Young adults deserve to know the truth that having kids today is horrible, and it's likely to get worse.

Horrible? Marrying a college classmate and having kids in your 20s is the smartest and most fulfilling thing a young adult can do.

Dating apps, hookup culture, boozing through your 20s, marrying in your 30s with tons of mental baggage, and then needing IVF to have a kid has really screwed Americans up.

How old are you?

No, that's called wasting your 20s and raising kids in poverty.

Your generation made it impossible to responsibly raise kids in your 20s.

DP

I respectfully agree with the PP you are so vehemently disagreeing with.

However, if you have to live in poverty to raise kids in your 20s, then you are right, it's miserable. Most women here who have kids in their 20s are UMC and above and are wealthy with lots of family support. That makes life so much easier and enjoyable. I wish I were in that situation. I had my first at 31, when I could comfortably afford them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The reactions of the parents in this spread demonstrate just how desperate they are to maintain the fairy tale that their lives weren't a series of huge mistakes.

You're not doing yourself or anyone else a favor by suppressing your true feelings about having kids. Young adults deserve to know the truth that having kids today is horrible, and it's likely to get worse.

Horrible? Marrying a college classmate and having kids in your 20s is the smartest and most fulfilling thing a young adult can do.

Dating apps, hookup culture, boozing through your 20s, marrying in your 30s with tons of mental baggage, and then needing IVF to have a kid has really screwed Americans up.

How old are you?

No, that's called wasting your 20s and raising kids in poverty.

Your generation made it impossible to responsibly raise kids in your 20s.

DP

I respectfully agree with the PP you are so vehemently disagreeing with.

However, if you have to live in poverty to raise kids in your 20s, then you are right, it's miserable. Most women here who have kids in their 20s are UMC and above and are wealthy with lots of family support. That makes life so much easier and enjoyable. I wish I were in that situation. I had my first at 31, when I could comfortably afford them.

No, most people in their 20s are certainly not UMC. And the number that are continues to shrink.

[Anonymous]

I feel sorry for those who never had kids, I think they missed out on the importance stuff. I woukd it do it all over again, maybe even more kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The reactions of the parents in this spread demonstrate just how desperate they are to maintain the fairy tale that their lives weren't a series of huge mistakes.

You're not doing yourself or anyone else a favor by suppressing your true feelings about having kids. Young adults deserve to know the truth that having kids today is horrible, and it's likely to get worse.

Horrible? Marrying a college classmate and having kids in your 20s is the smartest and most fulfilling thing a young adult can do.

Dating apps, hookup culture, boozing through your 20s, marrying in your 30s with tons of mental baggage, and then needing IVF to have a kid has really screwed Americans up.

Not really. My parents were Boomers who married and had right out of college and they were also screwed up. My grandparents also got married young and had 5 kids, and they were screwed up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I feel sorry for people without children. I really do. But I will never ever reveal my thoughts in any way. Instead, I will say something like, "oh wow, I wish we could just head off to Europe like you" but know that I am just blowing smoke up your a-s trying to make you feel good. Inside I feel pity for you.

I feel sorry for working mothers. I really do. But I will never reveal my thoughts in anyway, unlike Harrison Butker, although I wholly agree with him.

Instead, I will say something like, "oh wow, congratulations in your promotion! I wish I had a high-powered career like you" but know that I am blowing smoke up your a-s trying to make you feel good for choosing to have your children raised by other women. Inside I feel pity for you.