It’s shocking how many parents tell us (DINKS) we “did it right”

[Anonymous]

My one childless friend has a full life but still battles the longing. My other childless friend has friends with kids across all ages and doesn't wish for any of it.

I sometimes hope my kids don't have kids, in the hopes that they can have a bit of a happier life. There's been a lot of unexpected hardship in my parenting journey.

My therapist used to tell me that my kids will be over 18 for much more of their life than they will be under 18. And maybe when mine are adults, I'll feel differently. At times, parenting has been gut wrenchingly horrible, and my childless friends deal with none of that. I have wished to not have to bear the stress of parenting in the circumstances that my/our life took me into.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My one childless friend has a full life but still battles the longing. My other childless friend has friends with kids across all ages and doesn't wish for any of it.

I sometimes hope my kids don't have kids, in the hopes that they can have a bit of a happier life. There's been a lot of unexpected hardship in my parenting journey.

My therapist used to tell me that my kids will be over 18 for much more of their life than they will be under 18. And maybe when mine are adults, I'll feel differently. At times, parenting has been gut wrenchingly horrible, and my childless friends deal with none of that. I have wished to not have to bear the stress of parenting in the circumstances that my/our life took me into.

Just curious and not attacking but do you think an ideal life is free from challenges? I truly don’t think you can enjoy life without knowing that you’ve made it thru some challenging and dark moments.

[Anonymous]

I say this to friends sometimes - it's more just a joke that they can leave when their niece/friend's kid is being a jerk. I just try to overcompensate sometimes when everyone is a parent and one person isn't. I have ZERO regrets about having kids. They are the best thing that ever happened to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My one childless friend has a full life but still battles the longing. My other childless friend has friends with kids across all ages and doesn't wish for any of it.

I sometimes hope my kids don't have kids, in the hopes that they can have a bit of a happier life. There's been a lot of unexpected hardship in my parenting journey.

My therapist used to tell me that my kids will be over 18 for much more of their life than they will be under 18. And maybe when mine are adults, I'll feel differently. At times, parenting has been gut wrenchingly horrible, and my childless friends deal with none of that. I have wished to not have to bear the stress of parenting in the circumstances that my/our life took me into.

It can get much worse when your kids are over 18. I know so many families with adult children who struggle with addiction, mental illness, inability to hold a job or become financially stable, etc.

The worrying and stress puts many parents into an early grave or a grey divorce. Or they spend lots of money trying to help stabilize their adult child. Once you're outside the wealthy parts of major cities, you discover that this instability is more of the rule than the exception with adult children.

The thing that scares me the most is that one of my now-young kids can't function in the adult world (for whatever reason). I don't want to spend the last few decades of my life worried about my adult kids.