Teen won't drink water in school unless I get her a Stanley Cup

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hope you haven’t given in yet, OP.

The newest TikTok videos are about “influencers” throwing their Stanley’s into the trash, due to lead concerns. Lead is used in the manufacturing process of Stanley’s. Article in WaPo.

Fwiw Owala and Hydroflask came out with statements that they are lead free.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hope you haven’t given in yet, OP.

The newest TikTok videos are about “influencers” throwing their Stanley’s into the trash, due to lead concerns. Lead is used in the manufacturing process of Stanley’s. Article in WaPo.

It doesn’t even matter if there is lead in them. All that matters is twits that the teens follow trashed their Stanley cups so they are dropping in popularity

[Anonymous]

The only lead in them is impossible to physically contact unless you wrenched the entire cup apart. I'm of two minds with this. If you really feel that getting the cup is against your values, don't do it. I am sure she is drinking something and even if not, she is in a situation where water is readily available from the fountain if she's desperate. She will not die of thirst. On the other hand, wanting to be on trend isn't necessarily insecure. My daughter really likes her Stanley and treats it like flesh and blood. She has certain trends she likes to follow and other ways she wants to set herself apart. Aesthetics are important to her, which tracks because she is an artist and into decorating too. I don't always agree with her aesthetic, but that's my problem. I digress. Which feels more important? Avoiding a trendy, pricey item or ensuring hydration? If she has a birthday or some other something to celebrate coming up, that could be a good excuse to get her one, if you want some justification!

[Anonymous]

Get the Stanley. This is not worth an argument or a 19-page thread.

[Anonymous]

Get her the water bottle. There's no need to call DD a terrorist or create a 19 page forum.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Middle school is the prime time for children, and girls especially, to be worried about fitting in and physical status symbols are a part of that. Bullying is worst at that time. I have never been really concerned about what people think or fitting in with the cool girls, but even I was desperate for a pair of the status jeans in middle school. My mother eventually gave in and got me a pair. So for your daughter, if it’s not the Stanley mug, it would be a specific jacket or shoes. It’s not really about the mug, but dealing with tween insecurities which is normal developmentally.

So I would get her one, but I like the idea of having a chore list to “earn” it.

“If it’s not the Stanley mug, it would be a specific jacket or shoes.”

That commenters advice is to give in and get the Stanley mug.

Sure, and where does it stop? What’s the next trend you’ll be manipulated into giving in to? Shoes, jeans, makeup, car …? If she wants things so badly, have her earn them. And stay within your budget. And if there is whining or guilt-tripping involved, then she needs to know it’s an automatic NO, not even if she earns it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Middle school is the prime time for children, and girls especially, to be worried about fitting in and physical status symbols are a part of that. Bullying is worst at that time. I have never been really concerned about what people think or fitting in with the cool girls, but even I was desperate for a pair of the status jeans in middle school. My mother eventually gave in and got me a pair. So for your daughter, if it’s not the Stanley mug, it would be a specific jacket or shoes. It’s not really about the mug, but dealing with tween insecurities which is normal developmentally.

So I would get her one, but I like the idea of having a chore list to “earn” it.

“If it’s not the Stanley mug, it would be a specific jacket or shoes.”

That commenters advice is to give in and get the Stanley mug.

Sure, and where does it stop? What’s the next trend you’ll be manipulated into giving in to? Shoes, jeans, makeup, car …? If she wants things so badly, have her earn them. And stay within your budget. And if there is whining or guilt-tripping involved, then she needs to know it’s an automatic NO, not even if she earns it.

But why take some kind of hard line stance against trends? It’s a meaningless stand that is only going to hurt your kid. yes budget is important. If it’s REALLY not in your budget to buy your kid a Stanley water bottle I’m sure they know that. They can buy it with their own money or earn money from babysitting, chores, or a job if they’re old enough.

But even if you think the trend items are stupid, they are clearly important TO YOUR KID. I don’t dismiss stuff that’s important to my kid even if it’s very blatantly silly kid stuff. Middle school is prime time for conformity and fitting in, like it or not. And if a silly water bottle is going to prevent her from being a victim on this one little issue, isn’t it worth it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Get her the water bottle. There's no need to call DD a terrorist or create a 19 page forum.

Hell to the no.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The only lead in them is impossible to physically contact unless you wrenched the entire cup apart. I'm of two minds with this. If you really feel that getting the cup is against your values, don't do it. I am sure she is drinking something and even if not, she is in a situation where water is readily available from the fountain if she's desperate. She will not die of thirst. On the other hand, wanting to be on trend isn't necessarily insecure. My daughter really likes her Stanley and treats it like flesh and blood. She has certain trends she likes to follow and other ways she wants to set herself apart. Aesthetics are important to her, which tracks because she is an artist and into decorating too. I don't always agree with her aesthetic, but that's my problem. I digress. Which feels more important? Avoiding a trendy, pricey item or ensuring hydration? If she has a birthday or some other something to celebrate coming up, that could be a good excuse to get her one, if you want some justification!

Lol

[Anonymous]

I can understand drawing the line at designer shoes that cost hundreds of dollars, but a stanley cup costs $35 on amazon and maybe you could find one on sale even cheaper elsewhere?

Drinking water seems important enough and this cup is affordable enough for the splurge. Just let her know that she is only getting 1 cup (or 2 if you can afford it), and not multiple in different color.

[Anonymous]

Why are you fighting this? They’re not expensive.

[Anonymous]

We didnt lug around water bottles in the 90s at all. And I dont remember being thirsty and certainly my doctor never said anything about my skin. This is all very odd to me. If she doesn't want to drink out of the bottles you have, she will be fine without.