Where do private schools really get you in life?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Somehow these threads always devolve into a bunch of public school parents nodding at each other in satisfaction as they proclaim loudly that there are no benefits to private school. In fact, private schools are positively detrimental!

We get it, folks. You’re happy with the educational choices you made for your family. That’s great. I’m happy for you. Do you really need to go on and on about it?

+1 I will add...as private school parents we're happy with the educational choices we made for our family. Ain't life grand when we all make the choices that we feel are best for our own families!?!

[Anonymous]

At most the give your child a better education. At the least, he or she is less likely to be murdered at school.

[Anonymous]

They not the

[Anonymous]

Going to private school gives you a leg up in life if your parents are fully invested and involved in the private school. Mine were not, and didn't understand that's the way it worked.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:At most the give your child a better education. At the least, he or she is less likely to be murdered at school.

This is very sad and sadly very true.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So much of what some are describing account for access to wealth not private education.

+1

It's both. They are not mutually exclusive. I went to private schools all my life. My DH did not. We are sending our kids to a Big-3. In my experience, the really excellent private schools provide students with:
1) The ability to write well-researched papers, properly formatted, with correct citations
2) Significant practice engaging in conversation in a classroom
3) Comfort conversing with adults outside the classroom
4) Understanding that engaging with faculty during office hours is a normal thing, not something you do in an emergency
5) Confidence that comes with competence
6) Educated exposure to fine arts, music, theater, and some sports
7) Expectation of self-advocacy
8) Time-management skills. There are hours and hours of homework at competitive private schools.
9) The ability to read and assess a lot of material quickly
10) Not being impressed by people who are really smart and work hard; this is the norm, not the exception. This can backfire because when private school kids are exposed to "the real world," they are in for a shock.

Give me a break. This strikes me as obnoxious, especially #10. And we send our kids to private school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op, for us it feels like our DC might have struggled for years with learning to read and behavior issues in public school, and these have been able to be addressed in a private school setting because of the small class sizes and commitment to work with the parents.

Our DC went to our excellent public K, but as DC went through the year, I get like there was a problem with DC’s reading and behavior. I reached out to the teacher multiple times to ask about both and was told DC was meeting grade level standards and behavior was normal. We decided to move DC to private.

Meanwhile, I signed DC up to get tested for dyslexia and ADHD based on my own instincts. DC has mild versions of both, but the testing showed DC was not at grade level for reading and the teacher (who assured us DCs behavior was typical) rated DC as having clinically significant problems with attention and following rules.

Long story short, DC needed a bit extra support in the classroom for a year or two form the teacher as they learned coping strategies for attention and reading. DC has blossomed and we finally feel like their performance at school is matching their potential. More than that, the teachers and staff have been amazing partners with us in supporting DC. I can’t tell you how helpful their detailed emails or phone calls about DC have been in ensuring we can provide the support DC needed. I truly feel that DC would not be set up for academic success without this support.

We now have all our kids in private because we see how much that personal attention can elevate a child’s education. I understand that not all kids have special needs, but the larger point is that at our private school we feel like we have a whole team to help us support our kids. I wish it didn’t taking paying for private school to have this support, since all kids would benefit.

Sounds like you found an amazing school. Will you share which one? As a parent with a child with mild special needs, I am looking for an environment just like this. Thanks for sharing your experience!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op, for us it feels like our DC might have struggled for years with learning to read and behavior issues in public school, and these have been able to be addressed in a private school setting because of the small class sizes and commitment to work with the parents.

Our DC went to our excellent public K, but as DC went through the year, I get like there was a problem with DC’s reading and behavior. I reached out to the teacher multiple times to ask about both and was told DC was meeting grade level standards and behavior was normal. We decided to move DC to private.

Meanwhile, I signed DC up to get tested for dyslexia and ADHD based on my own instincts. DC has mild versions of both, but the testing showed DC was not at grade level for reading and the teacher (who assured us DCs behavior was typical) rated DC as having clinically significant problems with attention and following rules.

Long story short, DC needed a bit extra support in the classroom for a year or two form the teacher as they learned coping strategies for attention and reading. DC has blossomed and we finally feel like their performance at school is matching their potential. More than that, the teachers and staff have been amazing partners with us in supporting DC. I can’t tell you how helpful their detailed emails or phone calls about DC have been in ensuring we can provide the support DC needed. I truly feel that DC would not be set up for academic success without this support.


We now have all our kids in private because we see how much that personal attention can elevate a child’s education. I understand that not all kids have special needs, but the larger point is that at our private school we feel like we have a whole team to help us support our kids. I wish it didn’t taking paying for private school to have this support, since all kids would benefit.

Sounds like you found an amazing school. Will you share which one? As a parent with a child with mild special needs, I am looking for an environment just like this. Thanks for sharing your experience!

Yes, please tell the school because from what others have stated, most private schools are not equipped to support SN beyonds the basics autism or executive functioning. And even then you need to have the diagnosis in hand, be able to clearly articulate the supports needed, and require nothing beyond maybe some extended test time or seating upfront and the smaller class size.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So much of what some are describing account for access to wealth not private education.

+1

It's both. They are not mutually exclusive. I went to private schools all my life. My DH did not. We are sending our kids to a Big-3. In my experience, the really excellent private schools provide students with:
1) The ability to write well-researched papers, properly formatted, with correct citations
2) Significant practice engaging in conversation in a classroom
3) Comfort conversing with adults outside the classroom
4) Understanding that engaging with faculty during office hours is a normal thing, not something you do in an emergency
5) Confidence that comes with competence
6) Educated exposure to fine arts, music, theater, and some sports
7) Expectation of self-advocacy
8) Time-management skills. There are hours and hours of homework at competitive private schools.
9) The ability to read and assess a lot of material quickly
10) Not being impressed by people who are really smart and work hard; this is the norm, not the exception. This can backfire because when private school kids are exposed to "the real world," they are in for a shock.

Give me a break. This strikes me as obnoxious, especially #10. And we send our kids to private school.

And the reasons why YOU send your kids to a top private school are??? False humility is really unbecoming.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So much of what some are describing account for access to wealth not private education.

+1

It's both. They are not mutually exclusive. I went to private schools all my life. My DH did not. We are sending our kids to a Big-3. In my experience, the really excellent private schools provide students with:
1) The ability to write well-researched papers, properly formatted, with correct citations
2) Significant practice engaging in conversation in a classroom
3) Comfort conversing with adults outside the classroom
4) Understanding that engaging with faculty during office hours is a normal thing, not something you do in an emergency
5) Confidence that comes with competence
6) Educated exposure to fine arts, music, theater, and some sports
7) Expectation of self-advocacy
8) Time-management skills. There are hours and hours of homework at competitive private schools.
9) The ability to read and assess a lot of material quickly
10) Not being impressed by people who are really smart and work hard; this is the norm, not the exception. This can backfire because when private school kids are exposed to "the real world," they are in for a shock.

Give me a break. This strikes me as obnoxious, especially #10. And we send our kids to private school.

I think it a pretty well considered and compiled list which encapsulates a lot of reasons why we chose private. Demystifying expertise is critically important.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:At most the give your child a better education. At the least, he or she is less likely to be murdered at school.

This is precisely why we are going to pay for private. It is a better education, will actually be in school, and we won't have to fear school shootings. So sad.

[Anonymous]

It's a sacrifice in our case and a religious school. I found good social (diverse even) groups, good prep for high school and college...overall life long connections and community.
Depends on the kid and school tho ==
My special need son didnt' last in one, but his morals are good, his work ethic, he still is in touch w/ kindergarten friends and is almost engaged to a gal in grad school...despite his poor academic history!
Either us or his first 8 years in private or both.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At most the give your child a better education. At the least, he or she is less likely to be murdered at school.

This is precisely why we are going to pay for private. It is a better education, will actually be in school, and we won't have to fear school shootings. So sad.

You do realize that private school kids are sometimes murdered too. Horrible that money does not buy you safety.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At most the give your child a better education. At the least, he or she is less likely to be murdered at school.

This is precisely why we are going to pay for private. It is a better education, will actually be in school, and we won't have to fear school shootings. So sad.

You do realize that private school kids are sometimes murdered too. Horrible that money does not buy you safety.

Yes, of course. But there is less chance that they will be killed at their private high school than a public one. That’s good enough for me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At most the give your child a better education. At the least, he or she is less likely to be murdered at school.

This is precisely why we are going to pay for private. It is a better education, will actually be in school, and we won't have to fear school shootings. So sad.

You do realize that private school kids are sometimes murdered too. Horrible that money does not buy you safety.

No "school shooters" at any privates yet. Our private invested in security officers and tightened up access to the school. I'm glad to pay for the extra security!