Where do private schools really get you in life?
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Anonymous
Uh, what? Poster asked a question. People have offered range of perspectives (most of them pro-private school, if you count). Why do you assume that the people who have misgivings about private school's value are all public school parents? Sure there are some people in that category who wind up here because it's on the recent topics list, or whatever, but I'm going to guess that most people on the private school board have some interest in .... private schools. Of those who may be posting more skeptical perspectives I will bet money that a good number are (I hate to break it to you!) staff and teachers. If you haven't heard an elite private school teacher let her hair down about parents lately, you're missing out. (We can make fun of the Caitlin Flanagan piece all we want, but I know more than one private school teacher who LOVED it.) In my own social circle, I can think of quite a few who are anguished about this choice and have moved kids from one type of school to the other as a result, with lasting ambivalence. Often they think their kid would struggle at a public school for one reason or another (and/or they have family money devoted to this purpose that's "use it or lose it") and yet are repelled by the parent crowd and affluenza at the private... |
Anonymous
| Private schools get you a sense of entitlement for the rest of your life. |
Anonymous
Um, Wow. This is a pretty small minded statement, particularly given OP’s original question. A question which likely comes down to one that’s asked constantly on this forum; value of outcome to cost of tuition. When a family has the income level or means to afford private school tuition at 50k without the cost being meaningful to everyday living, comforts and conveniences, then assessing the outcome value is easier because the financial lost is negligible. However, for other families where this is a significant investment that likely requires many sacrifices, it can be harder to determine if the cost is actually worthy. If you can’t understand this it likely indicates your inability to empathize with the experiences and concerns of a large percentage of the population. Which frankly is not a positive regardless of station in life. |
Anonymous
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Private schools, in this area, are amazing. The resources they provide are top notch. They are also a pipeline to great colleges. This should be completely obvious to anyone that has eyes and can read a newsletter. Besides maybe School Without Walls and Thomas Jefferson, no public is sending that high of percentage of kids to top tier universities than the privates in this area.
I have also seen the network these kids have when they graduate. It's insane -way better than what I grew up with. I have seen the support graduates get from former classmates when they run for office or decide to start a business. Remember, not every kid gets into these schools. It's competitive beyond just some testing nonsense. The kids are just better prepared to succeed in real life. That's just my take. |
Anonymous
On this point: "Remember, not every kid gets into these schools. It's competitive beyond just some testing nonsense. The kids are just better prepared to succeed in real life." This is true, but it you follow this to it's logical conclusion, you may end up somewhere you didn't expect to be. To that end, it is worth reading this wonderful Malcolm Gladwell piece (one of his best, from when he was at his best): https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2005/10/10/getting-in Punchline: Research shows that Harvard picks winners, it doesn't make them. The same is true of the most competitive private schools, to a decent extent. |
Anonymous
| Private schools are a tax rich people pay to keep their kids with other “like us” children. I attended private school and got a very good education, mostly because there were classes, no disruptive behavioral issues and peers whose parents were like mine. I can’t afford private school for my kids, but I would absolutely prefer to in high school, when peers inevitably shape my children’s behaviors and judgment. |
Anonymous
| Also private schools are self-selecting successful children; the type of parents who make enough money to 1. pay for school and 2. value education enough to pay for it, will likely have offspring who share those values. |
Anonymous
Please note that living in a “top” school district is exactly the same — rich people pay $2 million for a house to keep their kids with children like themselves. |
Anonymous
I agree. Housing prices are based on the same principle, that rich people want to be around other rich people. I’m sure rich people would rather spend $200k than $2 million for their home, but that’s the tax to live next to like-minded people. If I had teenagers, I would absolutely either send them to private school or rent in the best school district possible. Peer group affects 16 year olds much more than parenting, and if you have the choice between a school with lots of drugs and teen pregnancies or a school with none, the decision is easy. |
Anonymous
Honestly, I dont care IF my kids go to college, much less where. I send my kids to an elite private school to love learning in an environment that values curiosity. Nothing can replace critical thinking skills in life. In my opinion, if they have that from a young age the rest falls into place. The added bonus is that the other children also value learning, so it is a positive feedback loop. Some parents, yes, are only looking to college. I've perfect the art of smile and nod, but that is not my motive. Their kids are also smart and inquisitive, so it's part of the landscape. Love of learning happens early, so we sent our kids from a very young age. |
Anonymous
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Where does it get you?
My daughter doesn't have to compete with 1500 other kids for resources. She not only gets an academic education, she gets an education in social service and the religion of her choice (in this case, Catholic). She gets an education that truly prepares her for college. Yes, she gets connections that will last a lifetime and may pay off in the form of employment. And because she goes to an all-girls school, she receives all this on her terms, without having to deal with the social dominance of high school males (look it up - there are all kinds of studies showing that single-sex secondary education - male and female - provides an advantage). Mostly, my daughter goes to private school because I can afford it and it's a better school than the local public high school. |
Anonymous
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People go to public because they are poor, destitute, overwhelmed or confused. Covid exposed public as the lowest of the low.
Private is for everybody else. |
Anonymous
Maybe I just read too much Malcolm Gladwell, but I feel like this is pretty well understood. Private schools are in no small part outplacement businesses. Sure, they collect tuition and donations. Sure, they care about educational mission. None of those things happen if they can’t generate pretty good “life-after-[insert school here]-results.” This is true starting as early as preschool in the DC area: Parents care about outplacement, schools know they care, so schools try to hedge their bets and admit kids who will be easy to outplace. Legacy status, donor status, special talents, high test scores, other hooks—all are big admissions criteria at privates in no small part BECAUSE they are outplacement predictors. |
Anonymous
huh? you are really out of touch. And most private schools are not that great. There are maybe 10 in this whole area DMV that are worth the money. Maybe less. |
Anonymous
Well Pods or homeschooling is vastly superior as well on a budget. It’s heartbreaking to watch your kid go off in a public school bus. Public health, public transportation and public education are all just low quality and for the poor and/or overwhelmed. |