Can we have a rational discussion about going Greek?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I went to university in another country that didn’t have this system or anything similar. I made great friends and several are still friends 30 years later. But my friend group evolved over the 4 years as my classes went from general to specific and got smaller and l matured. I’m lifelong friends with people from 3rd and 4th year. I don’t know because l didn’t live it but if you’re in the Greek system it seems like your friend group is formed there and not with people you’re studying with? Are you friends with the same group for all four years? It seems limiting.

My kids were born in the us. My university Experience was amazing both socially and academically. I don’t want to have a closed mind but l think l will steer them away from Greek when the time comes.

+1
Greek orgs. get a lot of attention because they're so absurd, but the reality is that the vast, vast majority of U.S. college students aren't involved - even if there is Greek life on campus.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I pledged a fraternity and then de-pledged. My biggest issue with the Greek system isn't the costs involved or the craziness of rush. It's how the Greek system kind of steers you away from being involved in other things on campus. At my school, about 15 years ago, I was also working for the student newspaper and had a chance to cover a road basketball game for the first time. Great assignment. The fraternity was pissed at me because we had a party that night and I wasn't going to be around. That happened with 2-3 other club things I wanted to do that year, so ultimately, I concluded the fraternity wasn't for me.

My nephew is at a large state school now. He joined a fraternity. I asked him what kind of things he's involved with on campus and he said, "Not really anything. The fraternity takes all my time." He has a lot of interests, and I know his school has a lot of clubs related to those interests. I asked him if he's thinking about getting involved in this or that. "No, pretty much just the fraternity."

Overall, I think that's a big missed opportunity for kids.

+100
Our neighbor's daughter is involved in a sorority and that is ALL she does - plan parties and silly events. That's it. My DD decided not to rush and has found herself involved in so many interesting activities as a result. I am hugely relieved she didn't go Greek.

does your neighbor know that you're stalking her daughter so much that you know everything she does? does she also know you mock her? I'll bet she's a much nicer person than you are.

No need to stalk her - my neighbor talks incessantly about her and all her sorority "doings" (planning parties and silly events). I hear far more about that nonsense than I've ever wanted to. But thanks for your concern!

Well you are one nasty and gossipy shrew that’s obvious. And just because the girl’s mother talks that way doesn’t make it true. Are you really THAT jealous of some college kid and her mother? Why??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I pledged a fraternity and then de-pledged. My biggest issue with the Greek system isn't the costs involved or the craziness of rush. It's how the Greek system kind of steers you away from being involved in other things on campus. At my school, about 15 years ago, I was also working for the student newspaper and had a chance to cover a road basketball game for the first time. Great assignment. The fraternity was pissed at me because we had a party that night and I wasn't going to be around. That happened with 2-3 other club things I wanted to do that year, so ultimately, I concluded the fraternity wasn't for me.

My nephew is at a large state school now. He joined a fraternity. I asked him what kind of things he's involved with on campus and he said, "Not really anything. The fraternity takes all my time." He has a lot of interests, and I know his school has a lot of clubs related to those interests. I asked him if he's thinking about getting involved in this or that. "No, pretty much just the fraternity."

Overall, I think that's a big missed opportunity for kids.

+100
Our neighbor's daughter is involved in a sorority and that is ALL she does - plan parties and silly events. That's it. My DD decided not to rush and has found herself involved in so many interesting activities as a result. I am hugely relieved she didn't go Greek.

does your neighbor know that you're stalking her daughter so much that you know everything she does? does she also know you mock her? I'll bet she's a much nicer person than you are.

No need to stalk her - my neighbor talks incessantly about her and all her sorority "doings" (planning parties and silly events). I hear far more about that nonsense than I've ever wanted to. But thanks for your concern!

Well you are one nasty and gossipy shrew that’s obvious. And just because the girl’s mother talks that way doesn’t make it true. Are you really THAT jealous of some college kid and her mother? Why??

What? Nothing you're saying makes sense. Again - I am a passive listener when my neighbor drones on about her daughter. You're saying she's lying? Okaaaay... I'm sorry this discussion has triggered you so.

[Anonymous]

I loved being in a sorority (t 20 d3 college) in the late 1990s.

It was so much fun. And my sisters are now very successful in a wide range of fields/professions/lives.

My DD is now a freshman at my Alma Mater and I fully support her if, or if not, she decides to rush.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well, rush has been a pretty harsh experience for my freshman at a school with a supposedly laid back and friendly sorority system. It’s not very welcoming to go through the process and get cut from the houses she liked best just a couple of weeks into the college experience. I wish it was second semester to allow the kids to get more situated and comfortable at their new college before they subject themselves to this confidence killer. She only went through the process because everyone said how different it was from other schools.

I agree, I feel very strongly that school should not allow rush at the start of the school year. It’s such a bad idea in so many ways.

Agree. My kid started freshman year depressed. It’s cruel. These kids just left home and are so excited for a fresh start.

[Anonymous]

Why has no one posted about the benefits of life post-graduation?

I’m 2O yrs out so perspective is everything.

1. High achievers - most of my sorority sisters have highly respected jobs. My sorority housemates produced 4 doctors, 6 lawyers, 3 engineers, scientists, a federal judge, multiple business execs, tenured university professors, author, professional musician (classical), social workers/therapists, finance leaders, international policy experts, pharmacist, and school administrators.

More of them had their “s-together” faster than non greek friends.

2. Post-Grad Networking: Right after college a (same) sorority alum picked my resume out of a pile because of the sorority name. Hired! I’ve hired entry level and interns through the National sorority network. I also was a formal alumni mentor for 5 years through national. They match alumni with sorority seniors interested in your industry. Helped them with resumes, job hunting, thinking about grad school, and I was the person they called when they needed help navigating office politics in their first jobs.

3. Sorority was the best training for corporate life. Years of rush training pay off in interviews, public speaking, and sorority leadership teaches coalition building, how to politic politely but effectively. It also helps to understand social dynamics in a workplace which —!we all know can be toxic AF.

And, like most young adults post college, that college greek social life stops quickly. You aren’t going to mixers at at 40…

Point is that it’s just a few years of someone’s life, it’s an experience you can only have once, it offers structure to those who need it , and you learn what you can and move on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why has no one posted about the benefits of life post-graduation?

I’m 2O yrs out so perspective is everything.

1. High achievers - most of my sorority sisters have highly respected jobs. My sorority housemates produced 4 doctors, 6 lawyers, 3 engineers, scientists, a federal judge, multiple business execs, tenured university professors, author, professional musician (classical), social workers/therapists, finance leaders, international policy experts, pharmacist, and school administrators.

More of them had their “s-together” faster than non greek friends.

2. Post-Grad Networking: Right after college a (same) sorority alum picked my resume out of a pile because of the sorority name. Hired! I’ve hired entry level and interns through the National sorority network. I also was a formal alumni mentor for 5 years through national. They match alumni with sorority seniors interested in your industry. Helped them with resumes, job hunting, thinking about grad school, and I was the person they called when they needed help navigating office politics in their first jobs.

3. Sorority was the best training for corporate life. Years of rush training pay off in interviews, public speaking, and sorority leadership teaches coalition building, how to politic politely but effectively. It also helps to understand social dynamics in a workplace which —!we all know can be toxic AF.

And, like most young adults post college, that college greek social life stops quickly. You aren’t going to mixers at at 40…

Point is that it’s just a few years of someone’s life, it’s an experience you can only have once, it offers structure to those who need it , and you learn what you can and move on.

So the best reason to be in a sorority is that it exposes you to toxic stuff earlier in college and prepares you for life.