what happens when Dad abandons the family and Mom is left to handle everything, but doesn't want it either?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Foster care is not going to take these kids.

Actually, there are boarding schools like the Milton Hershey school where parents sign over custody and kids live at the school for free, get college endowment, healthcare, live like kings basically. So the option exists. Infants- 16 admissions.

That being said, if neither parent wants them - look into Milton Hershey school or similar. It’s an option, and they encourage kids to visit parents frequently and maintain close relationship.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nobody forced this woman to have three kids with a loser.

Dad did a complete 180 in midlife crisis. He was the model dad before the he bolted. Honestly, ladies, he could be any one of your husbands.

Please stop the internalized misogynistic, guilty posts on how bad the mom is and focus on the dad and what can be done to keep him from abandoning his kids

Accept it for what it is and do the best for the kids. Make him pay so that you can get the closest thing to another parent: a good nanny. And some therapists for everyone because this sounds rough. Not all of us are cut out to be parents alone, but if you can mitigate that...

[Anonymous]

Every time married women are having kids, they should only have the number of kids that they can raise if they have no husband.

So, one or two is the limit for most. Why are these women breeding like sows?

[Anonymous]

You accept that as the mom you are now the primary parent and always will be. You enjoy the break you will get every other weekend.
You raise the kids you chose to have knowing you are the better person. You make your children feel loved, wanted, cared for. They didn’t choose this.
You do your best.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The kids become wards of the state and enter into Foster Care

It would be better to get some help (mental, emotional, financial) rather than further messing up the lives of children.

This, give them to foster care and let someone adopt them who wants them.

oh because there are a dearth of kids in the foster system. Those 3 kids can surely be adopted very quickly. /s

https://adoptuskids.org/meet-the-children/children-in-foster-care/about-the-children

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OMG.. poor kids. Like I keep saying, most men should not have kids. They can't handle the responsibility.

In this case mom should not have had kids either.

The mom was not the one to leave the dad to basically be a single parent. I would find being a single parent daunting. I have seen several women go through this very situations where the dead beat dad just up and leaves the mom holding the bag, so to speak. Most of the moms do what they can, but it's incredibly difficult for them without any family support.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Every time married women are having kids, they should only have the number of kids that they can raise if they have no husband.

So, one or two is the limit for most. Why are these women breeding like sows?

Stop it. Any responsibility for the dad? Or is that just 1 big part of male privelege?

[Anonymous]

Why did these bozos have THREE kids?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why did these bozos have THREE kids?

No one goes into a marriage thinking that the man is going to have a midlife crisis and leave the wife and kids for the AP.... well, most people don't.

But, when marriages do break up, most of the times, it's the moms who get stuck with raising the children by herself, while the deadbeat dads see the kids once in a while and barely offer any financial help.

[Anonymous]

Boarding school or au pair.

Usually the oldest gets parentified.

Parenting in a divorce often becomes a race to the bottom. Sad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OMG.. poor kids. Like I keep saying, most men should not have kids. They can't handle the responsibility.

In this case mom should not have had kids either.

The mom was not the one to leave the dad to basically be a single parent. I would find being a single parent daunting. I have seen several women go through this very situations where the dead beat dad just up and leaves the mom holding the bag, so to speak. Most of the moms do what they can, but it's incredibly difficult for them without any family support.

True. But what option is there?

The rate of sexual and physical abuse in foster care, not to mention trafficking in group homes, is not insignificant.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why should Mom (or her Mom) be forced/guilted into/expected, etc to raise the kids.
Why not the Dad? Can court force dad to stick around? to be a 50% parent?
Dad likes to "pretend" he's a good dad to his out of town family and co-workers, but he's not

I think this is the point of OP's hypothetical. Why is one parent "allowed" to walk away and the other forced to carry the weight of parenting alone? Why aren't both forced to carry equal weight?

[Anonymous]

If mom wants 50/50 custody then the court should force dad. Why should the father be able to take less? They are his kids too. Legally, can he really just refuse 50/50?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Every time married women are having kids, they should only have the number of kids that they can raise if they have no husband.

So, one or two is the limit for most. Why are these women breeding like sows?

Why is the burden of parenthood only on women?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Every time married women are having kids, they should only have the number of kids that they can raise if they have no husband.

So, one or two is the limit for most. Why are these women breeding like sows?

Why is the burden of parenthood only on women?

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