Anyone completely blind sided by a cheating spouse ?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

What health and safety reasons? They are all safe and nothing I am doing is endangering anyone's health. But I'm not dumb, I know you harpies always have to claim that the cheating world is just a cesspool of STDs that I will bring home. Don't worry, you missed the part where I'm NOT having sex with my W. She can't catch anything from me. And married women are about the safest sex partners a man can chase. Much safer than single women in general.

You cannot stop a married woman or her husband from going nuclear on you, your wife or family. And you can’t know if someone (your AP or her spouse) will choose to do that under the right circumstances. So, no, married women are not the safest. Have you read the posts from women who are out to destroy the AP and her family? I know of a man who did the same thing, though less dramatically. You better keep watching over your shoulder.

Doesn't matter married or single there's a pretty good chance they will let your spouse know at some point. I know of one AP who did hang up calls on the wife. My sil had a visit from the AP. told her to come inside and once she was inside the home she beat her up. She had to go to court, but since she came inside and told the court AP attacked her it was dropped. I think it's best to just divorce, but wronged people will often want revenge.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

What health and safety reasons? They are all safe and nothing I am doing is endangering anyone's health. But I'm not dumb, I know you harpies always have to claim that the cheating world is just a cesspool of STDs that I will bring home. Don't worry, you missed the part where I'm NOT having sex with my W. She can't catch anything from me. And married women are about the safest sex partners a man can chase. Much safer than single women in general.

You cannot stop a married woman or her husband from going nuclear on you, your wife or family. And you can’t know if someone (your AP or her spouse) will choose to do that under the right circumstances. So, no, married women are not the safest. Have you read the posts from women who are out to destroy the AP and her family? I know of a man who did the same thing, though less dramatically. You better keep watching over your shoulder.

Thank you for your concern. While those risks are always there, it's not enough to deter me. I've been in the game a long time and I know what I'm doing. I've chosen my partners wisely. Most potential cheaters really do not do the things they need to insure they don't get busted, or their spouse won't sniff it out someday. Especially the new ones. I prefer those with some experience who can walk me through just how they cover their tracks. Of course, the APs spouse is always a big factor. A jealous spouse, or one that suspects does not make for a good partner. The woman I've been with, their spouse wouldn't know, or maybe just didn't care unless he tripped over my D while I was banging her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

What health and safety reasons? They are all safe and nothing I am doing is endangering anyone's health. But I'm not dumb, I know you harpies always have to claim that the cheating world is just a cesspool of STDs that I will bring home. Don't worry, you missed the part where I'm NOT having sex with my W. She can't catch anything from me. And married women are about the safest sex partners a man can chase. Much safer than single women in general.

You cannot stop a married woman or her husband from going nuclear on you, your wife or family. And you can’t know if someone (your AP or her spouse) will choose to do that under the right circumstances. So, no, married women are not the safest. Have you read the posts from women who are out to destroy the AP and her family? I know of a man who did the same thing, though less dramatically. You better keep watching over your shoulder.

Thank you for your concern. While those risks are always there, it's not enough to deter me. I've been in the game a long time and I know what I'm doing. I've chosen my partners wisely. Most potential cheaters really do not do the things they need to insure they don't get busted, or their spouse won't sniff it out someday. Especially the new ones. I prefer those with some experience who can walk me through just how they cover their tracks. Of course, the APs spouse is always a big factor. A jealous spouse, or one that suspects does not make for a good partner. The woman I've been with, their spouse wouldn't know, or maybe just didn't care unless he tripped over my D while I was banging her.

One person's trash is another person's AP trash.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was totally blindsided when my W lost all interest in sex and decided our married sex life was over, for good. After putting up with that a few years, I suppose she would feel just as blindsided (but she really shouldn't) to discover my ongoing affair. I'm sure that's how she would spin it. The ever faithful, perfect wife who thought she had a perfect marriage until one day this just... HAPPENED

But from her perspective, all IS fine. She doesn't really know that you still want sex. She does feel faithful and perfect, feeding you dinner every night. (b/c the way to a man's heart is through his STOMACH not his dick) (so says the saying). So, yes, she thinks all is fine and you are happily not having sex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

What health and safety reasons? They are all safe and nothing I am doing is endangering anyone's health. But I'm not dumb, I know you harpies always have to claim that the cheating world is just a cesspool of STDs that I will bring home. Don't worry, you missed the part where I'm NOT having sex with my W. She can't catch anything from me. And married women are about the safest sex partners a man can chase. Much safer than single women in general.

You cannot stop a married woman or her husband from going nuclear on you, your wife or family. And you can’t know if someone (your AP or her spouse) will choose to do that under the right circumstances. So, no, married women are not the safest. Have you read the posts from women who are out to destroy the AP and her family? I know of a man who did the same thing, though less dramatically. You better keep watching over your shoulder.

Thank you for your concern. While those risks are always there, it's not enough to deter me. I've been in the game a long time and I know what I'm doing. I've chosen my partners wisely. Most potential cheaters really do not do the things they need to insure they don't get busted, or their spouse won't sniff it out someday. Especially the new ones. I prefer those with some experience who can walk me through just how they cover their tracks. Of course, the APs spouse is always a big factor. A jealous spouse, or one that suspects does not make for a good partner. The woman I've been with, their spouse wouldn't know, or maybe just didn't care unless he tripped over my D while I was banging her.

You are such a repulsive human being, as are the women 'walking you through' how to become a pathological liar and lead a double life. Bunch of sickos--all of you.

[Anonymous]

It never justifies cheating. Never. Health and safety reasons--for your family.

Man up and ask for a divorce. Lying for years and stealing time away from your kids, spending $ on a non-family member is NEVER the way to go.


If they won't go to counseling, or compromise then yes go your separate ways. Never a reason to cheat and bring or bring some nut into your family's life.

I am not so sure about this. Honestly, I think I'd prefer my spouse spend 2-3 hours a week or so with someone else (someone safe) and maintain our relatively stable home for our kids than disrupt their lives so badly with divorce, two houses, recrimination, losing faith in your parents/home. I dont think either of us are cheater (although you never know) but I disagree that its "always" better to divorce. I guess I'm more of the DADT camp.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

It never justifies cheating. Never. Health and safety reasons--for your family.

Man up and ask for a divorce. Lying for years and stealing time away from your kids, spending $ on a non-family member is NEVER the way to go.


If they won't go to counseling, or compromise then yes go your separate ways. Never a reason to cheat and bring or bring some nut into your family's life.

I am not so sure about this. Honestly, I think I'd prefer my spouse spend 2-3 hours a week or so with someone else (someone safe) and maintain our relatively stable home for our kids than disrupt their lives so badly with divorce, two houses, recrimination, losing faith in your parents/home. I dont think either of us are cheater (although you never know) but I disagree that its "always" better to divorce. I guess I'm more of the DADT camp.

The problem is that you don’t know who is DADT and so maybe it should be a discussion between husband and wife. I would not want my husband to cheat and would want to make my own decision.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

It never justifies cheating. Never. Health and safety reasons--for your family.

Man up and ask for a divorce. Lying for years and stealing time away from your kids, spending $ on a non-family member is NEVER the way to go.


If they won't go to counseling, or compromise then yes go your separate ways. Never a reason to cheat and bring or bring some nut into your family's life.

I am not so sure about this. Honestly, I think I'd prefer my spouse spend 2-3 hours a week or so with someone else (someone safe) and maintain our relatively stable home for our kids than disrupt their lives so badly with divorce, two houses, recrimination, losing faith in your parents/home. I dont think either of us are cheater (although you never know) but I disagree that its "always" better to divorce. I guess I'm more of the DADT camp.

Considering how many people cheat and how few of those marriages end in divorce, I think the silent majority of people are in the DADT camp, or at least the idea that cheating isn't always the nuclear option.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

What health and safety reasons? They are all safe and nothing I am doing is endangering anyone's health. But I'm not dumb, I know you harpies always have to claim that the cheating world is just a cesspool of STDs that I will bring home. Don't worry, you missed the part where I'm NOT having sex with my W. She can't catch anything from me. And married women are about the safest sex partners a man can chase. Much safer than single women in general.

You cannot stop a married woman or her husband from going nuclear on you, your wife or family. And you can’t know if someone (your AP or her spouse) will choose to do that under the right circumstances. So, no, married women are not the safest. Have you read the posts from women who are out to destroy the AP and her family? I know of a man who did the same thing, though less dramatically. You better keep watching over your shoulder.

Thank you for your concern. While those risks are always there, it's not enough to deter me. I've been in the game a long time and I know what I'm doing. I've chosen my partners wisely. Most potential cheaters really do not do the things they need to insure they don't get busted, or their spouse won't sniff it out someday. Especially the new ones. I prefer those with some experience who can walk me through just how they cover their tracks. Of course, the APs spouse is always a big factor. A jealous spouse, or one that suspects does not make for a good partner. The woman I've been with, their spouse wouldn't know, or maybe just didn't care unless he tripped over my D while I was banging her.

One person's trash is another person's AP trash.

Yes, that's a popular thing to post here. Bashing the AP as being some trashy person. Not someone in a bad situation making a difficult choice. I'm sure it makes you feel better to imagine them like this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was totally blindsided when my W lost all interest in sex and decided our married sex life was over, for good. After putting up with that a few years, I suppose she would feel just as blindsided (but she really shouldn't) to discover my ongoing affair. I'm sure that's how she would spin it. The ever faithful, perfect wife who thought she had a perfect marriage until one day this just... HAPPENED

But from her perspective, all IS fine. She doesn't really know that you still want sex. She does feel faithful and perfect, feeding you dinner every night. (b/c the way to a man's heart is through his STOMACH not his dick) (so says the saying). So, yes, she thinks all is fine and you are happily not having sex.

Nope. She knows damn well all is not fine. I haven't kept that a secret. I've been very clear about it. I've just dropped the subject since taking on an AP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

What health and safety reasons? They are all safe and nothing I am doing is endangering anyone's health. But I'm not dumb, I know you harpies always have to claim that the cheating world is just a cesspool of STDs that I will bring home. Don't worry, you missed the part where I'm NOT having sex with my W. She can't catch anything from me. And married women are about the safest sex partners a man can chase. Much safer than single women in general.

You cannot stop a married woman or her husband from going nuclear on you, your wife or family. And you can’t know if someone (your AP or her spouse) will choose to do that under the right circumstances. So, no, married women are not the safest. Have you read the posts from women who are out to destroy the AP and her family? I know of a man who did the same thing, though less dramatically. You better keep watching over your shoulder.

Thank you for your concern. While those risks are always there, it's not enough to deter me. I've been in the game a long time and I know what I'm doing. I've chosen my partners wisely. Most potential cheaters really do not do the things they need to insure they don't get busted, or their spouse won't sniff it out someday. Especially the new ones. I prefer those with some experience who can walk me through just how they cover their tracks. Of course, the APs spouse is always a big factor. A jealous spouse, or one that suspects does not make for a good partner. The woman I've been with, their spouse wouldn't know, or maybe just didn't care unless he tripped over my D while I was banging her.

You are such a repulsive human being, as are the women 'walking you through' how to become a pathological liar and lead a double life. Bunch of sickos--all of you.

Thank you. Now please describe your situation so I know what perch you sit on to look down on me/us. I already know you are a woman so you can skip that. You know my situation. It's only fair you share yours if you're going to bash me.

-Married with at least a somewhat normal married sex life?

-Married and you are done with sex?

-Or...?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

It never justifies cheating. Never. Health and safety reasons--for your family.

Man up and ask for a divorce. Lying for years and stealing time away from your kids, spending $ on a non-family member is NEVER the way to go.


If they won't go to counseling, or compromise then yes go your separate ways. Never a reason to cheat and bring or bring some nut into your family's life.

I am not so sure about this. Honestly, I think I'd prefer my spouse spend 2-3 hours a week or so with someone else (someone safe) and maintain our relatively stable home for our kids than disrupt their lives so badly with divorce, two houses, recrimination, losing faith in your parents/home. I dont think either of us are cheater (although you never know) but I disagree that its "always" better to divorce. I guess I'm more of the DADT camp.

The problem is that you don’t know who is DADT and so maybe it should be a discussion between husband and wife. I would not want my husband to cheat and would want to make my own decision.

Do you mean to say that you would want a say in who he chooses for an AP? You know, it just doesn't work that way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

It never justifies cheating. Never. Health and safety reasons--for your family.

Man up and ask for a divorce. Lying for years and stealing time away from your kids, spending $ on a non-family member is NEVER the way to go.


If they won't go to counseling, or compromise then yes go your separate ways. Never a reason to cheat and bring or bring some nut into your family's life.

I am not so sure about this. Honestly, I think I'd prefer my spouse spend 2-3 hours a week or so with someone else (someone safe) and maintain our relatively stable home for our kids than disrupt their lives so badly with divorce, two houses, recrimination, losing faith in your parents/home. I dont think either of us are cheater (although you never know) but I disagree that its "always" better to divorce. I guess I'm more of the DADT camp.

Considering how many people cheat and how few of those marriages end in divorce, I think the silent majority of people are in the DADT camp, or at least the idea that cheating isn't always the nuclear option.

Once you run in those circles, yuo will never look at couples the same. I swear, I can tell if a married women is the kind who is open to cheating within 10 minutes of meeting her. I can spot couples in the park and know they are both married to someone else.

You would be amazed at the percentage of cheaters. I think I can find a cheating woman to meet for sex easier than I can find date if I was single. I'm also amazed at how many of these women are single themselves and willing to see a married man for NSA sex.

[Anonymous]

Cheaters are gross low-lifes. They feel entitled to "have their cake and eat it too," reaping all the benefits of both a monogamous relationship AND a single life. They lie to people who love them and prevent those people from making informed, autonomous decisions about their own lives. They often risk the faithful spouses health as well, since many cheaters can't be bothered to use condoms.

If your marriage sucks, do something about it. Go to counseling and make it better. Or divorce your spouse before your f* other people. Or be up front about wanting to go outside the relationship and offer your spouse the chance to be with others too. But don't pretend that cheating is your ONLY option.

No, you're just a garbage human.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

It never justifies cheating. Never. Health and safety reasons--for your family.

Man up and ask for a divorce. Lying for years and stealing time away from your kids, spending $ on a non-family member is NEVER the way to go.


If they won't go to counseling, or compromise then yes go your separate ways. Never a reason to cheat and bring or bring some nut into your family's life.

I am not so sure about this. Honestly, I think I'd prefer my spouse spend 2-3 hours a week or so with someone else (someone safe) and maintain our relatively stable home for our kids than disrupt their lives so badly with divorce, two houses, recrimination, losing faith in your parents/home. I dont think either of us are cheater (although you never know) but I disagree that its "always" better to divorce. I guess I'm more of the DADT camp.

Considering how many people cheat and how few of those marriages end in divorce, I think the silent majority of people are in the DADT camp, or at least the idea that cheating isn't always the nuclear option.

Once you run in those circles, yuo will never look at couples the same. I swear, I can tell if a married women is the kind who is open to cheating within 10 minutes of meeting her. I can spot couples in the park and know they are both married to someone else.

You would be amazed at the percentage of cheaters. I think I can find a cheating woman to meet for sex easier than I can find date if I was single. I'm also amazed at how many of these women are single themselves and willing to see a married man for NSA sex.

So why don't you just divorce your wife or do you want to wait until kids are grown up? Just curious.