Click here for Bad Advice

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve saved $2000 for college for my 13 yo. She wants to go to Harvard. Have I ruined her chances for a debt free life?

Sign her up for dance class. Teach her the art of finding sugar daddies.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How do I relay to my house guests that the kitchen is closed? I don’t want them dirtying you my house

Padlock the fridge and cabinets at night and leave directions to Burger King on the counter.

[Anonymous]

How do I tell my host I only eat plant-based?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Found out the guy I was dating was cheating. 800000 missing condoms. I know for a fact we used 3. Any advice? I am forlorn, just devastated I say, devastated.

Move far away. Spend all of your 401K buying plane tickets to visit him on the weekends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Which toilet seat should I buy for my commode?

You don’t need a toilet. You should use a compost pit in your backyard. If your neighbors complain, build a fence, but don’t tell them.

[Anonymous]

How many potatoes should I prepare for my dinner party?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How many potatoes should I prepare for my dinner party?

Zero. Instead, try two asparagus spears per person.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My teen keeps sneaking out after we fall asleep. What should we do?

My toddler acts out when he’s not getting enough protein. Maybe add a string cheese snack at bedtime?

I laughed so hard I cried at this one. Then I tried it and it worked! Subbed half a wheel for Brie though, because we live in Willowbrook. HHI 250k.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How many potatoes should I prepare for my dinner party?

Zero. Instead, try two asparagus spears per person.

Nope. Lightly fried tuna is the only way to go.

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend and I have been dating for 12 years, 3 months, and 27 days. When is he going to pop the question? I'm tired of waiting!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My boyfriend and I have been dating for 12 years, 3 months, and 27 days. When is he going to pop the question? I'm tired of waiting!

Any time now! Don’t bring it up though-that would ruin the magic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How do I tell my host I only eat plant-based?

PowerPoint deck delineating reasons/benefits.

[Anonymous]

I’m writing from a beach vacation with my in laws. FIL keeps taking the kids (3 and 5) skin diving without sunscreen. Also, the older cousins have been pressuring them to vape and when I intervened my SIL placed a hex on me. My husband thinks I’m being too sensitive. What should I do?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m writing from a beach vacation with my in laws. FIL keeps taking the kids (3 and 5) skin diving without sunscreen. Also, the older cousins have been pressuring them to vape and when I intervened my SIL placed a hex on me. My husband thinks I’m being too sensitive. What should I do?

Let me guess, first time parent?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What do I say when I answer my phone and someone calls? Used to texting. Halp

Seriously, who calls anymore? If they don't know to text, then don't answer.

Incorrect. You say, "yes I'd like to extend my car warranty, thank you!"

Don’t forget to give them your social security #.