Dating at gender-lopsided universities

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Make the SAT and GPA equally weighted (50-50) and keep the rest of the app holistic (ECs, essays, LORs, etc.).

Just equally weighting SAT/GPA will level the playing field for boys. Males develop later than female students so their 9th/10th grade GPAs usually pull them down. Equally weighting the SAT (which is taken in 11th/12th grade) helps them show their growth.

Another approach is not counting 9th grade at all for either gender. Or giving more weight to junior year.

Again…somehow all the issues you mention regarding male development were never a problem until like what 5 years ago? 10 years ago?

Clearly it’s more than this because men had no problem enrolling in college at equal and higher numbers than women in the past.

Also, there are hundreds of colleges with 90%+ acceptance rates. None of the things you mention above for boys would impact their attending these colleges which include schools like Kansas or Michigan State which are top 75.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Make the SAT and GPA equally weighted (50-50) and keep the rest of the app holistic (ECs, essays, LORs, etc.).

Just equally weighting SAT/GPA will level the playing field for boys. Males develop later than female students so their 9th/10th grade GPAs usually pull them down. Equally weighting the SAT (which is taken in 11th/12th grade) helps them show their growth.

Another approach is not counting 9th grade at all for either gender. Or giving more weight to junior year.

Again…somehow all the issues you mention regarding male development were never a problem until like what 5 years ago? 10 years ago?

Clearly it’s more than this because men had no problem enrolling in college at equal and higher numbers than women in the past.

Also, there are hundreds of colleges with 90%+ acceptance rates. None of the things you mention above for boys would impact their attending these colleges which include schools like Kansas or Michigan State which are top 75.

I might be off by a year or two, but around 10 years ago the SAT changed how it weighed math vs language scores to give enhanced weight to language over math, with the goal of raising girl scores over boys scores.

A lot was written about it at the time.

It was a change explicitly designed to benefit girls over boys.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Make the SAT and GPA equally weighted (50-50) and keep the rest of the app holistic (ECs, essays, LORs, etc.).

Just equally weighting SAT/GPA will level the playing field for boys. Males develop later than female students so their 9th/10th grade GPAs usually pull them down. Equally weighting the SAT (which is taken in 11th/12th grade) helps them show their growth.

Another approach is not counting 9th grade at all for either gender. Or giving more weight to junior year.

Again…somehow all the issues you mention regarding male development were never a problem until like what 5 years ago? 10 years ago?

Clearly it’s more than this because men had no problem enrolling in college at equal and higher numbers than women in the past.

Also, there are hundreds of colleges with 90%+ acceptance rates. None of the things you mention above for boys would impact their attending these colleges which include schools like Kansas or Michigan State which are top 75.

I might be off by a year or two, but around 10 years ago the SAT changed how it weighed math vs language scores to give enhanced weight to language over math, with the goal of raising girl scores over boys scores.

A lot was written about it at the time.

It was a change explicitly designed to benefit girls over boys.

But that change has zero to do with fewer boys going to college in general…it may impact which specific college.

[Anonymous]

“Most young men are center left if you press them on issues.”

No they aren’t. They will never tell you what they really think because they know that will provoke a boring scoldy lecture from you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do agree with some of the conclusions here. I have both boys and girls, so you won't catch me bashing either.

My daughter would love to be "asked out" in the old-fashioned way. Dinner, coffee, whatever. She's sick of "talking to" guys.

My son is definitely a bit afraid to ask out a girl and either be shot down or shamed. He has friends who are gay and bisexual, but he admits to being confused about whether it's OK to pursue a girl who has said she's bi.

I don’t really understand sort of extreme reactions like this.

My two sons attended DCPS and while they shrugged at some of the social engineering, neither felt oppressed or overwhelmed by the messaging. Maybe in the scheme of things DCPS isn’t that crazy.

Neither has ever had an issue reading social cues and asking women out…sometimes a rejection happens but I guess they ask out normal people because there is no public shaming.

I don't think he'd get shamed, either, but HE thinks he would!

I totally agree.

The guys (thanks to social media in my opinion) think they are going to be mocked and shamed if they make a misstep.

Social media has destroyed dating relationships.

Social media, and more specifically influencers and podcasters are feeding your children crap information.

It is the female centered influencers, mostly.

I have boys, and I listen to guy focused social media, which is mostly right leaning.

Almost all of them are telling young men to get off video games, stop watching porn, exercise, get a job, go to church, learn about the world and make yourself worthy of the young women you want to be with, with a bunch of sports and things like aliens and moon landing conspiracies thrown in.


The girl social media is heavily skewed to cutting out any guy from your life who is not hard left.

Just read the Facebook posts of your adult female friends and neighbors. They say the exact same thing. I can't tell you how many times women post here and on their identifiable Facebook pages things like "I would divorce my husband if I found out he was conservative/voted for Trump."

That polarization by women is not good for dating or for society at large.

My girls do not want to date maga guys and has nothing to do with social influencers. It affects their lives and they have the right to want to date soneone closer to their ideals rather than soneone who wants five kids and a trad wife. Are you suggesting otherwise?

There are very few red hat MAGA men at top 20 colleges. Most young men are center left if you press them on issues. I don’t think politics is the problem.

Both of my college boys have serious girlfriends. I think dating for them has been pretty normal. One met the other at a party. One met the other at the gym. And they pursued things as normal people do. But these are both 50-50 schools where everyone is high performing and sane.

My boys schools are in the South however - Tennessee and Texas. Things seem to be pretty normal there. Genuine relationships seem to be the norm by junior and senior years. At least at the good schools. Their friends also have serious girlfriends.

Ha. No most college age young men are not center left.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:“Most young men are center left if you press them on issues.”

No they aren’t. They will never tell you what they really think because they know that will provoke a boring scoldy lecture from you.

Well, yes they are. 51% of college men supported Harris. We are talking about college educated people here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:“Most young men are center left if you press them on issues.”

No they aren’t. They will never tell you what they really think because they know that will provoke a boring scoldy lecture from you.

Well, yes they are. 51% of college men supported Harris. We are talking about college educated people here.

Cite please.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:“Most young men are center left if you press them on issues.”

No they aren’t. They will never tell you what they really think because they know that will provoke a boring scoldy lecture from you.

Well, yes they are. 51% of college men supported Harris. We are talking about college educated people here.

That includes much older men. In-college-now males are much more conservative

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Make the SAT and GPA equally weighted (50-50) and keep the rest of the app holistic (ECs, essays, LORs, etc.).

Just equally weighting SAT/GPA will level the playing field for boys. Males develop later than female students so their 9th/10th grade GPAs usually pull them down. Equally weighting the SAT (which is taken in 11th/12th grade) helps them show their growth.

Another approach is not counting 9th grade at all for either gender. Or giving more weight to junior year.

Again…somehow all the issues you mention regarding male development were never a problem until like what 5 years ago? 10 years ago?

Clearly it’s more than this because men had no problem enrolling in college at equal and higher numbers than women in the past.

Also, there are hundreds of colleges with 90%+ acceptance rates. None of the things you mention above for boys would impact their attending these colleges which include schools like Kansas or Michigan State which are top 75.

I might be off by a year or two, but around 10 years ago the SAT changed how it weighed math vs language scores to give enhanced weight to language over math, with the goal of raising girl scores over boys scores.

A lot was written about it at the time.

It was a change explicitly designed to benefit girls over boys.

Hmm. Interesting.

[Anonymous]

I think it’s the video games. There are way more gamers in the basement than athletes on the field. Even the ones that are not athletic but do other things like kayak, or hike or skateboard or play an instrument are rarer than the gamers. Most women don’t want a guy that is only into video games, anime and Lord of the Rings type stuff. I’m not saying all women- but this is a big part of the problem

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:“Most young men are center left if you press them on issues.”

No they aren’t. They will never tell you what they really think because they know that will provoke a boring scoldy lecture from you.

Well, yes they are. 51% of college men supported Harris. We are talking about college educated people here.

That includes much older men. In-college-now males are much more conservative

More conservative vs 2020…but still slightly democratic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:“Most young men are center left if you press them on issues.”

No they aren’t. They will never tell you what they really think because they know that will provoke a boring scoldy lecture from you.

Well, yes they are. 51% of college men supported Harris. We are talking about college educated people here.

That includes much older men. In-college-now males are much more conservative

More conservative vs 2020…but still slightly democratic.

I don’t believe it based on the ones I know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:“Most young men are center left if you press them on issues.”

No they aren’t. They will never tell you what they really think because they know that will provoke a boring scoldy lecture from you.

Well, yes they are. 51% of college men supported Harris. We are talking about college educated people here.

That includes much older men. In-college-now males are much more conservative

More conservative vs 2020…but still slightly democratic.

I don’t believe it based on the ones I know.

Useless anecdotes aren’t facts. My two sons and all their college friends are Democrats and one even attends a southern ACC school. They are exactly center left.

Now, in a different life they might be Reagan republicans.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:“Most young men are center left if you press them on issues.”

No they aren’t. They will never tell you what they really think because they know that will provoke a boring scoldy lecture from you.

Well, yes they are. 51% of college men supported Harris. We are talking about college educated people here.

Taking above number at face value, it still does not support the conclusion. MANY center-right voters held their noses and voted for Harris as the "least bad" candidate (in their opinion).

Genuine moderate / centrist voters have had to vote for the "least bad candidate" for years now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do agree with some of the conclusions here. I have both boys and girls, so you won't catch me bashing either.

My daughter would love to be "asked out" in the old-fashioned way. Dinner, coffee, whatever. She's sick of "talking to" guys.

My son is definitely a bit afraid to ask out a girl and either be shot down or shamed. He has friends who are gay and bisexual, but he admits to being confused about whether it's OK to pursue a girl who has said she's bi.

I don’t really understand sort of extreme reactions like this.

My two sons attended DCPS and while they shrugged at some of the social engineering, neither felt oppressed or overwhelmed by the messaging. Maybe in the scheme of things DCPS isn’t that crazy.

Neither has ever had an issue reading social cues and asking women out…sometimes a rejection happens but I guess they ask out normal people because there is no public shaming.

I don't think he'd get shamed, either, but HE thinks he would!

I totally agree.

The guys (thanks to social media in my opinion) think they are going to be mocked and shamed if they make a misstep.

Social media has destroyed dating relationships.

Social media, and more specifically influencers and podcasters are feeding your children crap information.

It is the female centered influencers, mostly.

I have boys, and I listen to guy focused social media, which is mostly right leaning.

Almost all of them are telling young men to get off video games, stop watching porn, exercise, get a job, go to church, learn about the world and make yourself worthy of the young women you want to be with, with a bunch of sports and things like aliens and moon landing conspiracies thrown in.


The girl social media is heavily skewed to cutting out any guy from your life who is not hard left.

Just read the Facebook posts of your adult female friends and neighbors. They say the exact same thing. I can't tell you how many times women post here and on their identifiable Facebook pages things like "I would divorce my husband if I found out he was conservative/voted for Trump."

That polarization by women is not good for dating or for society at large.

My girls do not want to date maga guys and has nothing to do with social influencers. It affects their lives and they have the right to want to date soneone closer to their ideals rather than soneone who wants five kids and a trad wife. Are you suggesting otherwise?

There are very few red hat MAGA men at top 20 colleges. Most young men are center left if you press them on issues. I don’t think politics is the problem.

Eh… they may not wear the hats, but that’s where their hearts and votes are. But it’s the same for white women, so not really a big deal.