Dating at gender-lopsided universities

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do agree with some of the conclusions here. I have both boys and girls, so you won't catch me bashing either.

My daughter would love to be "asked out" in the old-fashioned way. Dinner, coffee, whatever. She's sick of "talking to" guys.

My son is definitely a bit afraid to ask out a girl and either be shot down or shamed. He has friends who are gay and bisexual, but he admits to being confused about whether it's OK to pursue a girl who has said she's bi.

I don’t really understand sort of extreme reactions like this.

My two sons attended DCPS and while they shrugged at some of the social engineering, neither felt oppressed or overwhelmed by the messaging. Maybe in the scheme of things DCPS isn’t that crazy.

Neither has ever had an issue reading social cues and asking women out…sometimes a rejection happens but I guess they ask out normal people because there is no public shaming.

I don't think he'd get shamed, either, but HE thinks he would!

I totally agree.

The guys (thanks to social media in my opinion) think they are going to be mocked and shamed if they make a misstep.

Social media has destroyed dating relationships.

Social media, and more specifically influencers and podcasters are feeding your children crap information.

It is the female centered influencers, mostly.

I have boys, and I listen to guy focused social media, which is mostly right leaning.

Almost all of them are telling young men to get off video games, stop watching porn, exercise, get a job, go to church, learn about the world and make yourself worthy of the young women you want to be with, with a bunch of sports and things like aliens and moon landing conspiracies thrown in.


The girl social media is heavily skewed to cutting out any guy from your life who is not hard left.

Just read the Facebook posts of your adult female friends and neighbors. They say the exact same thing. I can't tell you how many times women post here and on their identifiable Facebook pages things like "I would divorce my husband if I found out he was conservative/voted for Trump."

That polarization by women is not good for dating or for society at large.

My girls do not want to date maga guys and has nothing to do with social influencers. It affects their lives and they have the right to want to date soneone closer to their ideals rather than soneone who wants five kids and a trad wife. Are you suggesting otherwise?

+1

Pushing boys to the right is bad for dating and society.

[Anonymous]

You want your boys to date? Have them reject MAGA and respect women. It’s really not that hard.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do agree with some of the conclusions here. I have both boys and girls, so you won't catch me bashing either.

My daughter would love to be "asked out" in the old-fashioned way. Dinner, coffee, whatever. She's sick of "talking to" guys.

My son is definitely a bit afraid to ask out a girl and either be shot down or shamed. He has friends who are gay and bisexual, but he admits to being confused about whether it's OK to pursue a girl who has said she's bi.

I don’t really understand sort of extreme reactions like this.

My two sons attended DCPS and while they shrugged at some of the social engineering, neither felt oppressed or overwhelmed by the messaging. Maybe in the scheme of things DCPS isn’t that crazy.

Neither has ever had an issue reading social cues and asking women out…sometimes a rejection happens but I guess they ask out normal people because there is no public shaming.

I don't think he'd get shamed, either, but HE thinks he would!

I totally agree.

The guys (thanks to social media in my opinion) think they are going to be mocked and shamed if they make a misstep.

Social media has destroyed dating relationships.

Social media, and more specifically influencers and podcasters are feeding your children crap information.

It is the female centered influencers, mostly.

I have boys, and I listen to guy focused social media, which is mostly right leaning.

Almost all of them are telling young men to get off video games, stop watching porn, exercise, get a job, go to church, learn about the world and make yourself worthy of the young women you want to be with, with a bunch of sports and things like aliens and moon landing conspiracies thrown in.


The girl social media is heavily skewed to cutting out any guy from your life who is not hard left.

Just read the Facebook posts of your adult female friends and neighbors. They say the exact same thing. I can't tell you how many times women post here and on their identifiable Facebook pages things like "I would divorce my husband if I found out he was conservative/voted for Trump."

That polarization by women is not good for dating or for society at large.

My girls do not want to date maga guys and has nothing to do with social influencers. It affects their lives and they have the right to want to date soneone closer to their ideals rather than soneone who wants five kids and a trad wife. Are you suggesting otherwise?

And this is the problem.

They are too far left.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do agree with some of the conclusions here. I have both boys and girls, so you won't catch me bashing either.

My daughter would love to be "asked out" in the old-fashioned way. Dinner, coffee, whatever. She's sick of "talking to" guys.

My son is definitely a bit afraid to ask out a girl and either be shot down or shamed. He has friends who are gay and bisexual, but he admits to being confused about whether it's OK to pursue a girl who has said she's bi.

I don’t really understand sort of extreme reactions like this.

My two sons attended DCPS and while they shrugged at some of the social engineering, neither felt oppressed or overwhelmed by the messaging. Maybe in the scheme of things DCPS isn’t that crazy.

Neither has ever had an issue reading social cues and asking women out…sometimes a rejection happens but I guess they ask out normal people because there is no public shaming.

I don't think he'd get shamed, either, but HE thinks he would!

I totally agree.

The guys (thanks to social media in my opinion) think they are going to be mocked and shamed if they make a misstep.

Social media has destroyed dating relationships.

Social media, and more specifically influencers and podcasters are feeding your children crap information.

It is the female centered influencers, mostly.

I have boys, and I listen to guy focused social media, which is mostly right leaning.

Almost all of them are telling young men to get off video games, stop watching porn, exercise, get a job, go to church, learn about the world and make yourself worthy of the young women you want to be with, with a bunch of sports and things like aliens and moon landing conspiracies thrown in.


The girl social media is heavily skewed to cutting out any guy from your life who is not hard left.

Just read the Facebook posts of your adult female friends and neighbors. They say the exact same thing. I can't tell you how many times women post here and on their identifiable Facebook pages things like "I would divorce my husband if I found out he was conservative/voted for Trump."

That polarization by women is not good for dating or for society at large.

My girls do not want to date maga guys and has nothing to do with social influencers. It affects their lives and they have the right to want to date soneone closer to their ideals rather than soneone who wants five kids and a trad wife. Are you suggesting otherwise?

+1

Pushing boys to the right is bad for dating and society.

This is bad for society in your opinion?

Get a job
Quit watching porn
Stop spending all your time on video games
Exercise
Go to church
Stop smoking pot
Become a man worthy of the women you want to date


If so, the problem is not the young men.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do agree with some of the conclusions here. I have both boys and girls, so you won't catch me bashing either.

My daughter would love to be "asked out" in the old-fashioned way. Dinner, coffee, whatever. She's sick of "talking to" guys.

My son is definitely a bit afraid to ask out a girl and either be shot down or shamed. He has friends who are gay and bisexual, but he admits to being confused about whether it's OK to pursue a girl who has said she's bi.

I don’t really understand sort of extreme reactions like this.

My two sons attended DCPS and while they shrugged at some of the social engineering, neither felt oppressed or overwhelmed by the messaging. Maybe in the scheme of things DCPS isn’t that crazy.

Neither has ever had an issue reading social cues and asking women out…sometimes a rejection happens but I guess they ask out normal people because there is no public shaming.

I don't think he'd get shamed, either, but HE thinks he would!

I totally agree.

The guys (thanks to social media in my opinion) think they are going to be mocked and shamed if they make a misstep.

Social media has destroyed dating relationships.

Social media, and more specifically influencers and podcasters are feeding your children crap information.

It is the female centered influencers, mostly.

I have boys, and I listen to guy focused social media, which is mostly right leaning.

Almost all of them are telling young men to get off video games, stop watching porn, exercise, get a job, go to church, learn about the world and make yourself worthy of the young women you want to be with, with a bunch of sports and things like aliens and moon landing conspiracies thrown in.


The girl social media is heavily skewed to cutting out any guy from your life who is not hard left.

Just read the Facebook posts of your adult female friends and neighbors. They say the exact same thing. I can't tell you how many times women post here and on their identifiable Facebook pages things like "I would divorce my husband if I found out he was conservative/voted for Trump."

That polarization by women is not good for dating or for society at large.

My girls do not want to date maga guys and has nothing to do with social influencers. It affects their lives and they have the right to want to date soneone closer to their ideals rather than soneone who wants five kids and a trad wife. Are you suggesting otherwise?

+1

Pushing boys to the right is bad for dating and society.

This is bad for society in your opinion?

Get a job
Quit watching porn
Stop spending all your time on video games
Exercise
Go to church
Stop smoking pot
Become a man worthy of the women you want to date

If so, the problem is not the young men.

Well...then why are any men complaining?

They would only be complaining if in fact they still are not worth of the women they want to date, right?

BTW, the "go to church" is complete bullshit. Something tells me it can't be a Unitarian church or any faith that isn't sufficiently "conservative".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do agree with some of the conclusions here. I have both boys and girls, so you won't catch me bashing either.

My daughter would love to be "asked out" in the old-fashioned way. Dinner, coffee, whatever. She's sick of "talking to" guys.

My son is definitely a bit afraid to ask out a girl and either be shot down or shamed. He has friends who are gay and bisexual, but he admits to being confused about whether it's OK to pursue a girl who has said she's bi.

I don’t really understand sort of extreme reactions like this.

My two sons attended DCPS and while they shrugged at some of the social engineering, neither felt oppressed or overwhelmed by the messaging. Maybe in the scheme of things DCPS isn’t that crazy.

Neither has ever had an issue reading social cues and asking women out…sometimes a rejection happens but I guess they ask out normal people because there is no public shaming.

I don't think he'd get shamed, either, but HE thinks he would!

I totally agree.

The guys (thanks to social media in my opinion) think they are going to be mocked and shamed if they make a misstep.

Social media has destroyed dating relationships.

Social media, and more specifically influencers and podcasters are feeding your children crap information.

It is the female centered influencers, mostly.

I have boys, and I listen to guy focused social media, which is mostly right leaning.

Almost all of them are telling young men to get off video games, stop watching porn, exercise, get a job, go to church, learn about the world and make yourself worthy of the young women you want to be with, with a bunch of sports and things like aliens and moon landing conspiracies thrown in.


The girl social media is heavily skewed to cutting out any guy from your life who is not hard left.

Just read the Facebook posts of your adult female friends and neighbors. They say the exact same thing. I can't tell you how many times women post here and on their identifiable Facebook pages things like "I would divorce my husband if I found out he was conservative/voted for Trump."

That polarization by women is not good for dating or for society at large.

My girls do not want to date maga guys and has nothing to do with social influencers. It affects their lives and they have the right to want to date soneone closer to their ideals rather than soneone who wants five kids and a trad wife. Are you suggesting otherwise?

And this is the problem.

They are too far left.

Plenty of center-left people won't date Maga, as plenty of center-right won't date Democratic Socialists.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:UMD is the choice. Big Ten and 51/49 m/f.

Well run

+1. Why is UMD among the only balanced options?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You want your boys to date? Have them reject MAGA and respect women. It’s really not that hard.

Except it’s not about that. It would be nice if things were so tidy. They aren’t.

There are plenty of middle of the road boys who respect people. Who play some video games but not a ton. Who are reasonably fit. Who are in college or college bound. Normal people. Who are having trouble meeting people and can’t figure it out. Don’t turn them into the enemy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:60w/40m

So confused.....0 non-binary??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Asked out on dates"

Is she willing to do the asking?

That's not going to go well

Why not?

I'm surprised you don't know this. Men want to do the choosing. If they want to date you they will ask. If they don't ask they won't want you. And I don't want to hear about the one man who was asked out because this true of the majority of men!

The 1950s have spoken.

Don't you know? With this administration we are going bsck to 1870s

The good news is that most women will refuse to reproduce with MAGA guys.

The bad news is that those guys are armed and are trained to squash empathy

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do agree with some of the conclusions here. I have both boys and girls, so you won't catch me bashing either.

My daughter would love to be "asked out" in the old-fashioned way. Dinner, coffee, whatever. She's sick of "talking to" guys.

My son is definitely a bit afraid to ask out a girl and either be shot down or shamed. He has friends who are gay and bisexual, but he admits to being confused about whether it's OK to pursue a girl who has said she's bi.

I don’t really understand sort of extreme reactions like this.

My two sons attended DCPS and while they shrugged at some of the social engineering, neither felt oppressed or overwhelmed by the messaging. Maybe in the scheme of things DCPS isn’t that crazy.

Neither has ever had an issue reading social cues and asking women out…sometimes a rejection happens but I guess they ask out normal people because there is no public shaming.

I don't think he'd get shamed, either, but HE thinks he would!

I totally agree.

The guys (thanks to social media in my opinion) think they are going to be mocked and shamed if they make a misstep.

Social media has destroyed dating relationships.

Social media, and more specifically influencers and podcasters are feeding your children crap information.

It is the female centered influencers, mostly.

I have boys, and I listen to guy focused social media, which is mostly right leaning.

Almost all of them are telling young men to get off video games, stop watching porn, exercise, get a job, go to church, learn about the world and make yourself worthy of the young women you want to be with, with a bunch of sports and things like aliens and moon landing conspiracies thrown in.


The girl social media is heavily skewed to cutting out any guy from your life who is not hard left.

Just read the Facebook posts of your adult female friends and neighbors. They say the exact same thing. I can't tell you how many times women post here and on their identifiable Facebook pages things like "I would divorce my husband if I found out he was conservative/voted for Trump."

That polarization by women is not good for dating or for society at large.

My girls do not want to date maga guys and has nothing to do with social influencers. It affects their lives and they have the right to want to date soneone closer to their ideals rather than soneone who wants five kids and a trad wife. Are you suggesting otherwise?

There are very few red hat MAGA men at top 20 colleges. Most young men are center left if you press them on issues. I don’t think politics is the problem.

Both of my college boys have serious girlfriends. I think dating for them has been pretty normal. One met the other at a party. One met the other at the gym. And they pursued things as normal people do. But these are both 50-50 schools where everyone is high performing and sane.

My boys schools are in the South however - Tennessee and Texas. Things seem to be pretty normal there. Genuine relationships seem to be the norm by junior and senior years. At least at the good schools. Their friends also have serious girlfriends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do agree with some of the conclusions here. I have both boys and girls, so you won't catch me bashing either.

My daughter would love to be "asked out" in the old-fashioned way. Dinner, coffee, whatever. She's sick of "talking to" guys.

My son is definitely a bit afraid to ask out a girl and either be shot down or shamed. He has friends who are gay and bisexual, but he admits to being confused about whether it's OK to pursue a girl who has said she's bi.

I don’t really understand sort of extreme reactions like this.

My two sons attended DCPS and while they shrugged at some of the social engineering, neither felt oppressed or overwhelmed by the messaging. Maybe in the scheme of things DCPS isn’t that crazy.

Neither has ever had an issue reading social cues and asking women out…sometimes a rejection happens but I guess they ask out normal people because there is no public shaming.

I don't think he'd get shamed, either, but HE thinks he would!

I totally agree.

The guys (thanks to social media in my opinion) think they are going to be mocked and shamed if they make a misstep.

Social media has destroyed dating relationships.

Social media, and more specifically influencers and podcasters are feeding your children crap information.

It is the female centered influencers, mostly.

I have boys, and I listen to guy focused social media, which is mostly right leaning.

Almost all of them are telling young men to get off video games, stop watching porn, exercise, get a job, go to church, learn about the world and make yourself worthy of the young women you want to be with, with a bunch of sports and things like aliens and moon landing conspiracies thrown in.


The girl social media is heavily skewed to cutting out any guy from your life who is not hard left.

Just read the Facebook posts of your adult female friends and neighbors. They say the exact same thing. I can't tell you how many times women post here and on their identifiable Facebook pages things like "I would divorce my husband if I found out he was conservative/voted for Trump."

That polarization by women is not good for dating or for society at large.

My girls do not want to date maga guys and has nothing to do with social influencers. It affects their lives and they have the right to want to date soneone closer to their ideals rather than soneone who wants five kids and a trad wife. Are you suggesting otherwise?

There are very few red hat MAGA men at top 20 colleges. Most young men are center left if you press them on issues. I don’t think politics is the problem.

Both of my college boys have serious girlfriends. I think dating for them has been pretty normal. One met the other at a party. One met the other at the gym. And they pursued things as normal people do. But these are both 50-50 schools where everyone is high performing and sane.

My boys schools are in the South however - Tennessee and Texas. Things seem to be pretty normal there. Genuine relationships seem to be the norm by junior and senior years. At least at the good schools. Their friends also have serious girlfriends.

I agree with you.

Things are more normal in the Midwest and South.

[Anonymous]

Make the SAT and GPA equally weighted (50-50) and keep the rest of the app holistic (ECs, essays, LORs, etc.).

Just equally weighting SAT/GPA will level the playing field for boys. Males develop later than female students so their 9th/10th grade GPAs usually pull them down. Equally weighting the SAT (which is taken in 11th/12th grade) helps them show their growth.

Another approach is not counting 9th grade at all for either gender. Or giving more weight to junior year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You want your boys to date? Have them reject MAGA and respect women. It’s really not that hard.

+1

I have three boys and am so proud that they are all anti-Maga and do not listen to these right-wing gun nut influencers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Make the SAT and GPA equally weighted (50-50) and keep the rest of the app holistic (ECs, essays, LORs, etc.).

Just equally weighting SAT/GPA will level the playing field for boys. Males develop later than female students so their 9th/10th grade GPAs usually pull them down. Equally weighting the SAT (which is taken in 11th/12th grade) helps them show their growth.

Another approach is not counting 9th grade at all for either gender. Or giving more weight to junior year.

These are interesting thoughts. If I could throw out my kid's 10th grade grades, I would. But junior year and SATs were good!