New VA trans policies for schools

[Anonymous]

The state only raises children when they are orphans until then no

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I think this is not complicated.

1. Schools cannot lie to parents unless there is a clear safety issue which has been documented.

2. Schools do not exist to protect children from their parents.

3. A child may want to transition back.

Number one is irritating me because if your kid asks me to call them a name, I’m going to. I’m not calling home for every kid that does this to check, that’s ridiculous. But it isn’t “lying” to you. If your kid comes out to me, i’m going to assume you know and not call you to discuss. That’s not lying. If your child discloses to me harm, abuse, or danger, I will appropriately report that as I am legally required to do and always have.

DP. When a student does not turn in a signed field trip form, does the school allow them to go anyway? If so, would that be lying to the parents? If a parent opts-out their child from an FLE lesson, and the child wants to attend, does the school allow them to attend anyway (as was described in the related FCPS thread)? If so, would that be lying to the parents?

Schools aren't telling parents every time a student changes their name or pronoun. (Although if this is burdensome for teachers, as a poster described upthread, with many students frequently changing their name or pronouns, then this could be a way to deal with that.) But should schools be in the business of hiding information about a student from the parent?

DP, Third grade teacher

If we don’t have a signed field trip permission slip, the student does not go. If a child is opted out of an FLE lesson, or any other opt-out, the child doesn’t participate. The school is very cautious about opt-outs.

I’ve never had a student change their pronouns. I have had students ask to be called names other than their full name that include nicknames not typically associated with their given name, but it’s never been an issue. It’s always been a name the family uses.

When Dr. Reid told parents that she would allow an opted-out student to attend FLE if they wanted to, she was violating that. If parents cannot trust schools to honor opt-outs, then how can parents trust schools? These new guidelines are/will be getting a lot of pushback. But they're needed, for parents to trust schools with their children.

I don’t know that she said that. I’ve only read you saying she said that. Of a child’s parent opts them out we 100% honor that. Now, if a parent wants the child to attend and the child chooses to opt out, that can happen. That happens with the SEL screener in particular.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The state only raises children when they are orphans until then no

We don’t want to raise your children. We have our own. We do want them to learn, since that’s what we do- teach.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Are the rules really that bad? Don’t socially transition a child without the parent’s knowledge and permission? Sports that are segregated by sex continue to be segregated by sex rather than gender identity?

If you're a right wing conservative and anti trans then I guess the new rules are perfectly fine.

I'm neither, but women's rights don't get trumped by biological boys who don't want to compete against other biological boys.

Mom of a straight cis girl here. I don't think she wants to share the girls bathroom with trans boys who everyone considers to be boys. What about her rights?

+1 there are moms here in VA that are listening to their girls at home say they don't want to have to change a pad or tampon with a biological boy in the next stall or have to change clothes with them in the locker room. These girls have rights too.

There were a lot of white girls uncomfortable with sharing a bathroom with black girls too. Sometimes things make us uncomfortable but that doesn't mean that it is wrong or we should make laws banning it.

There are a lot of things that trans activists say that are morally and ethically appalling, but the way white trans activists continually exploit, attack, and undermine the femininity of Black women and girls to make their points is particularly horrific. If you are white and you can’t make your argument without using the femininity of Black girls, maybe you shouldn’t make your argument at all. Get their names out of your mouth.

THANK YOU!
Equating Black girls and women to predatory males is horrific.

DP. We're talking about middle school and high school kids here, trans girls and trans boys. Not "predatory males".

Coopting white guilt to promote trans kids isn't right. But neither is calling a 14 year old trans girl predatory.

There are two girls in Loudoun that would disagree with you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am 100% positive that the person who compared trans girls to Black girls is not Black.

That’s a racist line that person should never, ever cross, but because of the endemic racism of many trans rights advocates, the poster didn’t even think about it, but went right ahead and colonized and used the experience of Black girls. It happens all the time in the trans rights movement, and it’s wrong. And it’s okay to call that out.

I will apologize and not use a comparison again. I will merely say throughout the history of the world folks have been uncomfortable sharing space with other people that they do not think belong in their space. That doesn't mean we given in to uncomfortable feelings.

Women getting preyed upon by males is not an uncomfortable feeling, it is biological reality. Women and girls deserve to feel safe in sex segregated spaces.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are the rules really that bad? Don’t socially transition a child without the parent’s knowledge and permission? Sports that are segregated by sex continue to be segregated by sex rather than gender identity?

If you're a right wing conservative and anti trans then I guess the new rules are perfectly fine.

I'm neither, but women's rights don't get trumped by biological boys who don't want to compete against other biological boys.

Mom of a straight cis girl here. I don't think she wants to share the girls bathroom with trans boys who everyone considers to be boys. What about her rights?

+1 there are moms here in VA that are listening to their girls at home say they don't want to have to change a pad or tampon with a biological boy in the next stall or have to change clothes with them in the locker room. These girls have rights too.

There were a lot of white girls uncomfortable with sharing a bathroom with black girls too. Sometimes things make us uncomfortable but that doesn't mean that it is wrong or we should make laws banning it.

There are a lot of things that trans activists say that are morally and ethically appalling, but the way white trans activists continually exploit, attack, and undermine the femininity of Black women and girls to make their points is particularly horrific. If you are white and you can’t make your argument without using the femininity of Black girls, maybe you shouldn’t make your argument at all. Get their names out of your mouth.

THANK YOU!
Equating Black girls and women to predatory males is horrific.

DP. We're talking about middle school and high school kids here, trans girls and trans boys. Not "predatory males".

Coopting white guilt to promote trans kids isn't right. But neither is calling a 14 year old trans girl predatory.

There are two girls in Loudoun that would disagree with you.

These were very different cases than what we are discussing and you know it. Men can still go into women's bathrooms and assault women. A rules against biological males in girls bathrooms doesn't do anything to stop that. Stop acting like bathrooms were some super safe place until trans people magically popped onto the GOPs radar a few years ago.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The state only raises children when they are orphans until then no

We don’t want to raise your children. We have our own. We do want them to learn, since that’s what we do- teach.

Stick to the science , math , English whatever the sats are and nothing more , leave the social justice to the parents, churches and other charitable orgs

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The state only raises children when they are orphans until then no

We don’t want to raise your children. We have our own. We do want them to learn, since that’s what we do- teach.

Stick to the science , math , English whatever the sats are and nothing more , leave the social justice to the parents, churches and other charitable orgs

So what books are kids supposed to read? Since they can clearly only read books that have no social issues whatsoever (conservative or liberal). I guess they are reading the dictionary? Although I heard Merriam-Webster is pretty woke these days.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:The emotional blackmail about trans suicides has already started in our local Facebook group.

It’s not emotional blackmail, it’s statistics. I understand they are not comfortable to absorb but that isn’t blackmail. LGBTQ teens commit suicide at rates much, much higher than their cis straight peers . The world is cruel to them.

Threatening self harm when you don't get your way is tactic of manipulation used by abusers. Same thing here.

If a kid threaten self harm they need medical help and support.....SOMETHING ONLY THEIR PARENTS CAN PROVIDE.

Seriously? You think parents of suicidal teens are equipped to provide the medical treatment they need? You do realize parents can't prescribe anti-depressants, unless they're an MD? And parents don't have the training for mental health counseling?

Sometimes it is better to be thought a fool instead speaking and proving you are one.
No sweetheart, parents are the only people that are legally responsible for a minor's medical care. YOU cannot take a STUDENT that is NOT YOUR child (its awful that I have to remind you of this) through a mental health crisis such as suicide ideation.
If these kids are so medically fragile that they threaten self harm if someone doesn't "affirm" their identity, then it is up to the parents to intervene. NOT YOU.

Yes, it is the parents' responsibility. But that's not what the original statement was. It takes more than the parents to provide what the child needs and if the parents aren't providing it, I believe others should "intervene" on behalf of a minor in extreme circumstances such as expressing suicidal intentions or credible evidence of abuse. It's just the morally right thing to do. The teacher doesn't have to "out" the student to the parent; the teacher can notify the parent of a generic urgent need for medical consultation. As you say, it's a parent's obligation to determine the cause of that need and provide access to the medical treatment needed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are the rules really that bad? Don’t socially transition a child without the parent’s knowledge and permission? Sports that are segregated by sex continue to be segregated by sex rather than gender identity?

If you're a right wing conservative and anti trans then I guess the new rules are perfectly fine.

I'm neither, but women's rights don't get trumped by biological boys who don't want to compete against other biological boys.

Mom of a straight cis girl here. I don't think she wants to share the girls bathroom with trans boys who everyone considers to be boys. What about her rights?

+1 there are moms here in VA that are listening to their girls at home say they don't want to have to change a pad or tampon with a biological boy in the next stall or have to change clothes with them in the locker room. These girls have rights too.

There were a lot of white girls uncomfortable with sharing a bathroom with black girls too. Sometimes things make us uncomfortable but that doesn't mean that it is wrong or we should make laws banning it.

There are a lot of things that trans activists say that are morally and ethically appalling, but the way white trans activists continually exploit, attack, and undermine the femininity of Black women and girls to make their points is particularly horrific. If you are white and you can’t make your argument without using the femininity of Black girls, maybe you shouldn’t make your argument at all. Get their names out of your mouth.

OK, then. White people were uncomfortable with sharing restrooms and drinking fountains with Black people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am 100% positive that the person who compared trans girls to Black girls is not Black.

That’s a racist line that person should never, ever cross, but because of the endemic racism of many trans rights advocates, the poster didn’t even think about it, but went right ahead and colonized and used the experience of Black girls. It happens all the time in the trans rights movement, and it’s wrong. And it’s okay to call that out.

So if the person who made the statement were Black, it would be ok?
'cause essentially, no white person can ever bring up race without being called racist.

[Anonymous]

An even stronger statement from Dr. Duran/APS and I, for one, really appreciate it.

Dear APS Community,

As many of you are aware, the Virginia Department of Education (VDOE) announced new model policies for the treatment of transgender, non-binary and gender fluid students.

I reaffirm our unwavering support for our LGBTQIA+ students, staff and community. I want our transgender, non-binary, and gender fluid students to hear loud and clear that you belong here, you are valued, and we stand with and support you. Who you are enhances the lives and educational experiences of all APS students and staff. We have reviewed the model policies and determined that our current policies and policy implementation procedures that protect the rights of our transgender students will stay as is. ​Moreover, they are in alignment with decisions from the Fourth Circuit Court of Appeals, Title IX of the Educational Amendments of 1973, and the Equal Protection Clause of the Fourteenth Amendment.

I oppose any policy that infringes upon the rights of our students and threatens the safety and well-being of our LGBTQIA+ students. APS will continue to uphold our core mission and follow our policies to ensure that every child receives equal educational access and opportunities. We fully support our transgender and LGBTQIA+ students and value the many diverse identities within our schools, where every student can authentically express themselves, feel valued and have a genuine sense of belonging.

I know that the announcement of these new model policies may be distressing to some of our students. As we transition into the 2023-24 school year, school counselors, school psychologists, and school social workers are available at our schools to provide a listening and reassuring space. Additional resources for transgender, non-binary, and gender fluid youth may be found on our website and the on the Arlington County website. If families have any additional questions or concerns, they may also reach out to their child’s school.

We will continue to model and live our values in support of inclusion, belonging, well-being and access to quality education. ​To this end, our current policies and procedures that protect, affirm, and celebrate transgender, non-binary, and gender-fluid students are of paramount importance in adhering to these ideals.

Sincerely,

Dr. Francisco Durán
Superintendent

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You guys are all debating this naming thing and referencing nicknames. I think the real issue was that teachers were inundated with pronoun requests. And kids were getting nasty about it when teachers couldn't remember whether a kid should be zher, her, zhe, ze, they, em, eir. Teachers have dozens of students in high school and I'm not sure why pronouns need to be a daily debate.

Agree! But teacher inconvenience isn't the motivation behind this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:An even stronger statement from Dr. Duran/APS and I, for one, really appreciate it.

Dear APS Community,

As many of you are aware, the Virginia Department of Education (VDOE) announced new model policies for the treatment of transgender, non-binary and gender fluid students.

I reaffirm our unwavering support for our LGBTQIA+ students, staff and community. I want our transgender, non-binary, and gender fluid students to hear loud and clear that you belong here, you are valued, and we stand with and support you. Who you are enhances the lives and educational experiences of all APS students and staff. We have reviewed the model policies and determined that our current policies and policy implementation procedures that protect the rights of our transgender students will stay as is. ​Moreover, they are in alignment with decisions from the Fourth Circuit Court of Appeals, Title IX of the Educational Amendments of 1973, and the Equal Protection Clause of the Fourteenth Amendment.

I oppose any policy that infringes upon the rights of our students and threatens the safety and well-being of our LGBTQIA+ students. APS will continue to uphold our core mission and follow our policies to ensure that every child receives equal educational access and opportunities. We fully support our transgender and LGBTQIA+ students and value the many diverse identities within our schools, where every student can authentically express themselves, feel valued and have a genuine sense of belonging.

I know that the announcement of these new model policies may be distressing to some of our students. As we transition into the 2023-24 school year, school counselors, school psychologists, and school social workers are available at our schools to provide a listening and reassuring space. Additional resources for transgender, non-binary, and gender fluid youth may be found on our website and the on the Arlington County website. If families have any additional questions or concerns, they may also reach out to their child’s school.

We will continue to model and live our values in support of inclusion, belonging, well-being and access to quality education. ​To this end, our current policies and procedures that protect, affirm, and celebrate transgender, non-binary, and gender-fluid students are of paramount importance in adhering to these ideals.

Sincerely,

Dr. Francisco Durán
Superintendent

+♾️

[Anonymous]

No mention of parents. Again. And no understanding of Title IX.