How to answer sons who are asking me why so many girls have 'girls are better' merch

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Report it to the school/camp admin.

Bullying is not acceptable.

A "Girls Rule" t-shirt is bullying?

How is it not?
Explicit sexism is not welcome in school.

OMFG. Shirts like this don't say anything negative about boys. "Girls rule!" does not mean boys don't.

Oh? Can you explain what rule means then, I don’t think I understand. When I looked it up online it said rule meant to dominate or be the best. If you are the best it is understood that the opposing group, isn’t.

NP. Is English your first language? Saying something “rules” means it is awesome, not that it outranks something else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not sure how Girls on the Run got roped into this. It’s a quality program that has been around forever. It might be chapter-specific, but I believe boys can join GOTR.

LOL at the mom saying her son was hurt or confused that he couldn’t join GOTR. Ummm there are plenty of running clubs for kids. GOTR is not affiliated / sponsored by the schools.

Is your son also going to be hurt and confused when he can’t join the women’s cross country team in high school?

The very first Girls on the Run group was started in 1996 and included 13 girls. Very few mothers of elementary school students have participated themselves.

It operates like Girl Scouts. Someone has to be willing to step up and volunteer to lead a local council. This program only exists where an adult volunteers has made it happen. Adults are free to start a parallel program for boys. Parents are free to lobby their elementary school to ban organizations that won’t admit both sexes.

I’m a PP who has been critical here. To be clear - I actually have zero issues with single-sex programs. The issue is how to address with boys the differences in acceptable language and opportunities for boys v girls. Yes it is true that nothing is stopping parents from starting a boys group, but what boys (accurately) perceive is that there are many resources and much language currently for girls, with no boys equivalent. And moreover, I have my doubts about whether a boy-only group would ever be considered acceptable these days.

The boy equivalents are endemic. It’s weird you don’t understand that.

Why do you have to create an in-group out group dynamic by saying it is weird? That is divisive and doesn’t further conversation. It is also mean. An opinion/thought shouldn’t be “weird” and using that as a come back instead of just saying what you mean isn’t helpful.

Toots, not all opinions are valid. Especially when it’s been pointed out repeatedly why they are not and people cling stubbornly to them anyway. That’s weird.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not sure how Girls on the Run got roped into this. It’s a quality program that has been around forever. It might be chapter-specific, but I believe boys can join GOTR.

LOL at the mom saying her son was hurt or confused that he couldn’t join GOTR. Ummm there are plenty of running clubs for kids. GOTR is not affiliated / sponsored by the schools.

Is your son also going to be hurt and confused when he can’t join the women’s cross country team in high school?

The very first Girls on the Run group was started in 1996 and included 13 girls. Very few mothers of elementary school students have participated themselves.

It operates like Girl Scouts. Someone has to be willing to step up and volunteer to lead a local council. This program only exists where an adult volunteers has made it happen. Adults are free to start a parallel program for boys. Parents are free to lobby their elementary school to ban organizations that won’t admit both sexes.

I’m a PP who has been critical here. To be clear - I actually have zero issues with single-sex programs. The issue is how to address with boys the differences in acceptable language and opportunities for boys v girls. Yes it is true that nothing is stopping parents from starting a boys group, but what boys (accurately) perceive is that there are many resources and much language currently for girls, with no boys equivalent. And moreover, I have my doubts about whether a boy-only group would ever be considered acceptable these days.

The boy equivalents are endemic. It’s weird you don’t understand that.

Why do you have to create an in-group out group dynamic by saying it is weird? That is divisive and doesn’t further conversation. It is also mean. An opinion/thought shouldn’t be “weird” and using that as a come back instead of just saying what you mean isn’t helpful.

Toots, not all opinions are valid. Especially when it’s been pointed out repeatedly why they are not and people cling stubbornly to them anyway. That’s weird.

DP. Funny how you're arguing so strenuously when you're not in the right about this...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not sure how Girls on the Run got roped into this. It’s a quality program that has been around forever. It might be chapter-specific, but I believe boys can join GOTR.

LOL at the mom saying her son was hurt or confused that he couldn’t join GOTR. Ummm there are plenty of running clubs for kids. GOTR is not affiliated / sponsored by the schools.

Is your son also going to be hurt and confused when he can’t join the women’s cross country team in high school?

The very first Girls on the Run group was started in 1996 and included 13 girls. Very few mothers of elementary school students have participated themselves.

It operates like Girl Scouts. Someone has to be willing to step up and volunteer to lead a local council. This program only exists where an adult volunteers has made it happen. Adults are free to start a parallel program for boys. Parents are free to lobby their elementary school to ban organizations that won’t admit both sexes.

I’m a PP who has been critical here. To be clear - I actually have zero issues with single-sex programs. The issue is how to address with boys the differences in acceptable language and opportunities for boys v girls. Yes it is true that nothing is stopping parents from starting a boys group, but what boys (accurately) perceive is that there are many resources and much language currently for girls, with no boys equivalent. And moreover, I have my doubts about whether a boy-only group would ever be considered acceptable these days.

The boy equivalents are endemic. It’s weird you don’t understand that.

Why do you have to create an in-group out group dynamic by saying it is weird? That is divisive and doesn’t further conversation. It is also mean. An opinion/thought shouldn’t be “weird” and using that as a come back instead of just saying what you mean isn’t helpful.

Toots, not all opinions are valid. Especially when it’s been pointed out repeatedly why they are not and people cling stubbornly to them anyway. That’s weird.

DP. Funny how you're arguing so strenuously when you're not in the right about this...

But I am. 100%. Take a seat. Grownups are talking.

[Anonymous]

This feel like a thread resurrected from about 4 years ago, but with the dates changed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Report it to the school/camp admin.

Bullying is not acceptable.

A "Girls Rule" t-shirt is bullying?

Of course it is. Would you be okay with a Boys Rule shirt?

Both are equally gross.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not sure how Girls on the Run got roped into this. It’s a quality program that has been around forever. It might be chapter-specific, but I believe boys can join GOTR.

LOL at the mom saying her son was hurt or confused that he couldn’t join GOTR. Ummm there are plenty of running clubs for kids. GOTR is not affiliated / sponsored by the schools.

Is your son also going to be hurt and confused when he can’t join the women’s cross country team in high school?

The very first Girls on the Run group was started in 1996 and included 13 girls. Very few mothers of elementary school students have participated themselves.

It operates like Girl Scouts. Someone has to be willing to step up and volunteer to lead a local council. This program only exists where an adult volunteers has made it happen. Adults are free to start a parallel program for boys. Parents are free to lobby their elementary school to ban organizations that won’t admit both sexes.

I’m a PP who has been critical here. To be clear - I actually have zero issues with single-sex programs. The issue is how to address with boys the differences in acceptable language and opportunities for boys v girls. Yes it is true that nothing is stopping parents from starting a boys group, but what boys (accurately) perceive is that there are many resources and much language currently for girls, with no boys equivalent. And moreover, I have my doubts about whether a boy-only group would ever be considered acceptable these days.

The boy equivalents are endemic. It’s weird you don’t understand that.

Why do you have to create an in-group out group dynamic by saying it is weird? That is divisive and doesn’t further conversation. It is also mean. An opinion/thought shouldn’t be “weird” and using that as a come back instead of just saying what you mean isn’t helpful.

Toots, not all opinions are valid. Especially when it’s been pointed out repeatedly why they are not and people cling stubbornly to them anyway. That’s weird.

Well, OP the person using this slang word is the reason why girls walk around with “girls are better” merch. They need to have it because their Mother’s are insecure and use sexist labels when talking about other women. The Moms who buy the clothes haven’t figured out that respect for women goes deeper than glitter sparkles.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here’s the vibe I’m getting from this thread -

Moms of boys are feeling threatened because girls are being encouraged and elevated in ways that boys are not. I get that. My nephew was recently rejected from his dream school while a female classmate with lower scores/grades was admitted. On an individual level, that probably feels terrible.

But as a result, these “boy moms” on this thread are completely sticking their heads in the sand on the past and present. There is a need to encourage and elevate girls, as a whole.

Also, they’re just t-shirts. If your sons are so threatened by a t-shirt, how on earth are they going to survive this world? Do you have similar problems with MAGA hats? Black Girl Magic hashtags? WTF people.

Yeah, that's what you got if you want to look at it in the worst light possible.

If you actually listened - what moms are noting is that we want to raise our children with good values, but have a hard time knowing what to say when they point out something that appears true: that it is socially acceptable to have a "girls rule" shirt, but not a "boys rule" shirt. The important question is how to have this discussion with very young kids without pushing them away or making them feel like their feelings are unacceptable or must not be voiced. THAT dynamic is exactly what eventually pushes boys into the "red pill" dynamic: once they are in a forum where they are "allowed" to express these taboo feelings, they can now be expressed and exaggerated. Much better to validate boys feelings and acknowledge that it feels unfair. Separately, there actually is good reason to be concerned about how boys are doing. Many parents of boys (NOT just moms) have observed how in elementary school, girls seem to be doing much better than boys. This is supported by research.

It's a very *progressive adult* orthodoxy to be able to say piously "Oh, I understand that BLM does not mean white lives do not matter! Of course "girls rule" is just a way to correct for historical discrimination!" It's a fantasy to believe that children will be able to say or understand the same way.

Thank you. Very well said.

Agree.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not sure how Girls on the Run got roped into this. It’s a quality program that has been around forever. It might be chapter-specific, but I believe boys can join GOTR.

LOL at the mom saying her son was hurt or confused that he couldn’t join GOTR. Ummm there are plenty of running clubs for kids. GOTR is not affiliated / sponsored by the schools.

Is your son also going to be hurt and confused when he can’t join the women’s cross country team in high school?

The very first Girls on the Run group was started in 1996 and included 13 girls. Very few mothers of elementary school students have participated themselves.

It operates like Girl Scouts. Someone has to be willing to step up and volunteer to lead a local council. This program only exists where an adult volunteers has made it happen. Adults are free to start a parallel program for boys. Parents are free to lobby their elementary school to ban organizations that won’t admit both sexes.

I’m a PP who has been critical here. To be clear - I actually have zero issues with single-sex programs. The issue is how to address with boys the differences in acceptable language and opportunities for boys v girls. Yes it is true that nothing is stopping parents from starting a boys group, but what boys (accurately) perceive is that there are many resources and much language currently for girls, with no boys equivalent. And moreover, I have my doubts about whether a boy-only group would ever be considered acceptable these days.

The boy equivalents are endemic. It’s weird you don’t understand that.

Why do you have to create an in-group out group dynamic by saying it is weird? That is divisive and doesn’t further conversation. It is also mean. An opinion/thought shouldn’t be “weird” and using that as a come back instead of just saying what you mean isn’t helpful.

Toots, not all opinions are valid. Especially when it’s been pointed out repeatedly why they are not and people cling stubbornly to them anyway. That’s weird.

Well, OP the person using this slang word is the reason why girls walk around with “girls are better” merch. They need to have it because their Mother’s are insecure and use sexist labels when talking about other women. The Moms who buy the clothes haven’t figured out that respect for women goes deeper than glitter sparkles.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Here’s the vibe I’m getting from this thread -

Moms of boys are feeling threatened because girls are being encouraged and elevated in ways that boys are not. I get that. My nephew was recently rejected from his dream school while a female classmate with lower scores/grades was admitted. On an individual level, that probably feels terrible.

But as a result, these “boy moms” on this thread are completely sticking their heads in the sand on the past and present. There is a need to encourage and elevate girls, as a whole.

Also, they’re just t-shirts. If your sons are so threatened by a t-shirt, how on earth are they going to survive this world? Do you have similar problems with MAGA hats? Black Girl Magic hashtags? WTF people.

again, at NO point did OP say this was some huge problem for her kids.
can people not understand english at this point that someone says 'hey my kids asked this' and in their head it reads like 'my kids wont get out of bed in the morning due to devastation caused by another child's t shirt'.
read the f-ing original post people. jfc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here’s the vibe I’m getting from this thread -

Moms of boys are feeling threatened because girls are being encouraged and elevated in ways that boys are not. I get that. My nephew was recently rejected from his dream school while a female classmate with lower scores/grades was admitted. On an individual level, that probably feels terrible.

But as a result, these “boy moms” on this thread are completely sticking their heads in the sand on the past and present. There is a need to encourage and elevate girls, as a whole.

Also, they’re just t-shirts. If your sons are so threatened by a t-shirt, how on earth are they going to survive this world? Do you have similar problems with MAGA hats? Black Girl Magic hashtags? WTF people.

again, at NO point did OP say this was some huge problem for her kids.
can people not understand english at this point that someone says 'hey my kids asked this' and in their head it reads like 'my kids wont get out of bed in the morning due to devastation caused by another child's t shirt'.
read the f-ing original post people. jfc.

Not to mention it's clear the OP is interesting in a thoughtful response for her son and this person is attacking them... Being misogynistic in response to another mother, ironically.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The shirts probably say “girls rule” or “girl power” or “run like a girl”, etc. Your boys are likely being overly sensitive. I doubt a girl has a shirt that says “girls are better than boys”.

op - i think you're probably right that it's some version of 'girls rule'.
but my 7 year old is definitely getting this msg and he is not generally oversensitive at all (if anything the opposite!). So I do need some language to frame it around.

No, you're just not ready to see that he absolutely is oversensitive when it comes to female peers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The shirts probably say “girls rule” or “girl power” or “run like a girl”, etc. Your boys are likely being overly sensitive. I doubt a girl has a shirt that says “girls are better than boys”.

op - i think you're probably right that it's some version of 'girls rule'.
but my 7 year old is definitely getting this msg and he is not generally oversensitive at all (if anything the opposite!). So I do need some language to frame it around.

No, you're just not ready to see that he absolutely is oversensitive when it comes to female peers.

My female child would be the exact same way, is she oversensitive? Maybe I should tell her that.

/s

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The shirts probably say “girls rule” or “girl power” or “run like a girl”, etc. Your boys are likely being overly sensitive. I doubt a girl has a shirt that says “girls are better than boys”.

op - i think you're probably right that it's some version of 'girls rule'.
but my 7 year old is definitely getting this msg and he is not generally oversensitive at all (if anything the opposite!). So I do need some language to frame it around.

No. There are shirts in major stores that say “Girls do it better” and “anything boys can do girls can do it better”. I wouldn’t buy one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think explain that unfortunately in this country and in many, women and girls are denied basic rights, and because of this we pay extra care to uplift girls and their self-esteems, because the system is that boys rule the system, and you can have a sexual predator, narcissistic, no experience man elected over a competent women because the system is rigged to keep boys ruling.

you are saying biden is a sexual predator now?
aside from a million other questions, including whether you're sure your tinfoil hat is fitting ok right now, where would he even have the time or the energy?
the crazy in this country is getting seriously out of hand.

Yikes, your lack of a frontal lobe is really hurting you, Trumpie.